A bit of housekeeping: You may have noticed a change in my byline. I've been going by Jas and my pronouns are they/them. I don't care if you think non-binary people are spiders or the singular use of "they" is dumb. I'm just letting you know so that when you insult my intelligence in the comment section, you can do so properly. Don't make this weird! There's a pie thief on the loose: According to...