Just floating here like bananas inside a jello mold the things we thought mattered now we dont the things we thought didnt matter now oh i really dont remember when you thought if you didnt get your eyebrows eyebrows threaded every other week your life was over now people are just Walking Around looking like the back end of a peacock it doesnt matter no one cares for years weve been stuck inside the for now to keep pace of lives based on nonevent never given a moment to pause to look at the society we had created remember what used to matter before this pandemic remember what you used to focus on how many live picture of your dinner got on instagram what happened in the new episode of the voice of the real housewives of the walking dead or the farting diseased which superhero movie to go see and then complain about how it sucked afterwards whether the guy at work doesnt like you even though he smiles his stupid face that you we thought all of that mattered not of it really matters. Many of us maybe most of us have been living for nothing rushing towards nonsense while the world burns weve filled our days with the spastic motion of the boy that is if we stop to truly think about it we may figure out our scant few years of consciousness are pissed away as slaves that often meaningless jobs they the corporate obey we see almost none of it was essential instead the things we were ignoring what were whats actually essential forming a world that will last more than 20 years learning and creating enjoying clean water clean air clean food spending time with your beautiful family right dog god all right not that one go back to the waterfall jesus christs point is the stuff that matters is the stuff we were completely ignoring as our world was eaten by corporate profit but now now the Natural World is already reclaiming the spaces beaches around the globe are no longer flooded by fleshy apes and have been retaken by thousands and millions of birds massive highways normally filled with no ways pollution and coughs now sit empty quiet in cleveland in los angeles the air quality which is usually some of the worst in the nation has turned into one of the cleanest compared to other major cities even more impressive is the fact that the city has enjoyed its longest stretch of good air quality since 995 since 99 the by do you understand how long ago 9095 was in 9095 there was a movie starring chuck norris and a dog im not kidding and im pretty sure the dog want to go and go for that. Plus nitrogen dioxide has plummeted heres a map of the 2 different time has plummeted over china and italy during this pandemic bears and bobcats have been seen wandering around Yellowstone Park when they used to live in the shadows coyotes are out in a ballot in california again eating peoples paths its utopia zoom in hong kong thats been trying to get 2 pandas to mate for 10 years and now that the zoo is shut down they finally have what more proof do you need the pandas are. But in all seriousness and im sorry if you dont want to hear this im really sorry in order to stop Climate Change and create a Sustainable World it requires. The end of capitalism i know its upsetting i know and i know that theyre just saying that just saying that is not allowed on any Corporate Media dog and pony show bull infotainment hour if i said that on c. N. N. Or fox news a tranquilizer dart would hit me right in the knack right now and theyd cut to a commercial while my lifeless body was dragged off jack and fed to the starving ladies of fox news and only feed him once a week but lets be intellectually honest just for a moment as guardian columnist george bottom on the 0 said capitalism has 3. 00 and 8. 00 characteristics that drive us towards destruction firstly that it generates and relies upon perpetual growth and less growth on a planet with finite resources that is physically impossible and find my palm pale touching his toes ok its a possible the 2nd problem is the idea that our right to own natural wealth equates to the amount of money that weve got in the bank or we can borrow so you can take as much natural wealth away from other people as you like and it means that no matter what environmentalists do to drive a video game Climate Change the richest corporations in the world can just a new it by buying and polluting ever more the 3rd characteristic is the one that really ensures that people go along with capitalism the idea that everyone can pursue and can expect to find private luxury but of course thats impossible if everyone live the way the top one percent live on the planet would collapse quickly and in fact its glad to get away right now because of how a percentage of humanity lives we look at a very good point of pink things short i admit. I like to keep my private jet air conditioned to a nice 58 degrees in the hottest days of the summer and stocked full of rare endangered fish full lays not for me but for my 5 dogs who are bathed in only the freshest spring water shipped in from alaska but every cycle the fish fillet packages so i think im doing my part in the cold truth is 90 percent of humanity will never live anywhere near the way the richest people do in fact the World Bank Says that nearly half of the world lives on less than 5. 50 a day even as our planet crumbles under the weight of consumption and greed most people most people are in poverty and thats how the system of capitalism is designed its just it and its not a mistake its not a move to see its not a boo boo its by design it was meant to be that way as mon bio also said if we were to admit the truth if we take away the false promise of capitalism and just say to people look private luxuries only for a few people you will never have it and you wont even have a chance of getting it if we admit that then the entire justification for capitalism is no war. Im not saying i have all the answers but the pandemic shutdown has shown us the problem it is showing us what the world looks like without much pollution without the chaos and roar of mostly meaningless work and i dont mean that everything that has stopped is meaningless but most jobs clearly arent essential if you could stop doing something for a month or 2 and it doesnt kill anyone you know no one dies from the fact that your job is stopped. Thats not essential of course this t. V. Show here is essential because without me yelling. At the corrupt leaders then many people would be angry who could take it and kill themselves so im saving a lot of lives come to you from washington say the belle of the bases redacted i. Welcome my only cam dollars take the news from as you know Bernie Sanders has one of the democratic primaries to be there to drop out before handing the nomination to a senile old man who fought for segregation. And biden fought for segregation back when his brain was still working how terrifying is that if this supporters could say oh yeah well back then you know is brain was tapioca pudding back that back when he supported segregation then you might have something but no that was back when his brain was at its best but where was i yes Bernie Sanders led a Political Revolution john. Philip was and a back over to the neo liberal destruction of the planet he told his supporters they were going up against the democratic establishment against the republican establishment against the military establishment and the corporate establishment we are legion we never got out as i write. Till we surrender. And they win yeah they want. The democratic establishment republican establishment the military blah blah blah bernie wants to know they won and he endorses joe biden the one thing Bernie Sanders seems to have missed was that true Political Revolutions dont generally endorse everything they fought against bite in all honesty Bernie Sanders has done a lot of good by forcing certain ideas into the mainstream however he was never a revolutionary so if there is going to be a true Political Revolution in america as our empire collapses it must be far larger than just Bernie Sanders or just one person of any stripe it must be all of us and many and maybe sanders greatest addition to our National Discourse was showing that the Democratic Party will never let progress carry the day now just as in 2016 this time around the millionaires who run the Democratic Party did everything they could to stop burning standers campaign they rigged it with media manipulation they rigged it with collusion among the corporate establishment kissing joe bidens but on the same day he was so intense they had to rub chapstick on biden. They rigged it by closing polling places in sanders strongest areas they rigged it but instructing alexion volunteers to give out provisional ballots they rigged it with a shadow app in iowa they rigged it but you have black box Voting Machines that can never be held accountable they rigged it by suppressing social media to stop a Viral Movement of progress and human rights they rigged it with millions of dollars of dark money and they rig did by giving Bernie Sanders heart attack using a positive value on it is telling rag on developed by darpa and placed on mars you know jane 74 i made up that got the rest are true you cant put a brake on on mars because the earth is flat and mars is a plate of pasta sauce everyone knows that. Theyve really do it. In a 1000000 different ways and now were expected to jump in bed with joe biden thats no choice at all we have a choice between a serial liar serial Sexual Assault or serial narcissist serial pusher of racist policies old rich white man with mental problems funded by big banks and the worst slime puddles of Corporate America or donald trump theyre practically the same. This is like an election between Kim Kardashian and chloe card ashton i dont even know which is which this is not a choice would you rather have been if from back to the future 2 or mr burns from the simpsons thats your option. So go ahead good luck to those. Moving on i want to jump to how the New York Times has just realized something that everyone else knew for the past 20 years which thats thats their m. O. Because you say theres a reason i go after the New York Times because theres supposed to be the accurate media theres supposed to be the good one i dont spend much time Fact Checking fox news or something because that would be like Fact Checking your 2 year old after she got into the benadryl bottle and shes plastered calling out that fox news or m s n b c got something wrong feels like yelling and they say theyre drunk cause or you are incorrect in your assessment. Of course that doesnt mean i dont do it sometimes but still but yes the New York Times has suddenly realized that the rich have secretly been exploiting 99 percent of us for years they put together a series of charts that say g. D. P. Has risen 79 percent since the 1980 over that same 40 years the after tax income of the bottom bottom half of earners has risen only 20 percent but for the very wealthy the story is completely different their incomes have risen much faster than g. D. P. Up 420 percent since the 1980 s. And durable the New York Times just found out. Capitalism. Grow up so quick dont search to feel the quality hadnt soared over the past 40 to 50 years with the same g. D. P. That we have today but with 1980 levels of inequality every American Household in the bottom 90 percent of income would be earning about 12000. 00 more not just this year but permanently in effect each household in the bottom 90 percent is sending a check for 12000. 00 to every household in the top one percent year after year after year since 2011 and family in the bottom 90 percent has given the rich a 110468. 00 now nice of you to inform us New York Times this is certainly something that could have been brought to our attention years ago perhaps during the occupy wall Street Movement when it would have added massive amounts of fuel to the fires that were burning next week the New York Times is going to inform us that Osama Bin Laden is determined to attack within the u. S. Cant wait where to go to a quick break but check out my free standup comedy special at least camp american dot com my standup comedy special is free for the 1st time also grab the new r t america app portable t. V. Which is also free at portable dot tv slash download although i bet a lot more. The kind of Economic Growth rate that theres going to be one can be expected through the pandemic is going to. Come to the pinch any change to going to me is the only chance of returning to pretend any condition. Im not for decapitating anybody but i am for a day capitalizing all the wall street bankers by shifting the center of gravity of money from the dollar and fear to bitcoin and thats perfectly within our purview into our scope as global citizens who wish Justice Justice truth free competition and hard money thats the only just a stud matter thats sustainable thats real that doesnt rely on politicians. Whos changed american lives but pharmaceutical companies have a miraculous solution. Based drugs talk to people who are chronic pain patients believe that their prescription is working for them on the river to the city to. Price at the. Grocery dependency and addiction to opiates to long to use that really isnt scientifically just right now studies actually suggest that. The long term effects my. I know just being the absence of benefits but actually that they might be causing me want to. Welcome back im still a camp while the pandemic has exposed the failings of our government and corporate institutions it is also revealed how dependent state Unemployment Offices are on Outdated Technology we go now to correspondent only care of ana whos in the field reporting on this story theyre mailed me where are you today only 159 i think you know what we i had a middle c. On a 24 hour time machine ride it was super crowded because everyone was on their way to hitlers birth date even though i got off early it was terrible ok well when we talk about social distancing i think we mean space not time you need to well i wasnt going to go to new jersey thats not safe ever Unemployment Benefits may be delayed due to outdated Computer Systems but theres good news c. N. N. Reports new job openings at your local Unemployment Office he wanted urgently people who know a half century old computer language so states can process unemployment claims all you need is 50 plus Years Experience with the computer languages how old lee is little employee to ask the age of a Computer Program its name is cobol common business oriented language and it was created in 1959 by grace hopper who i just spoke to she cant believe that were still using the code either. And its really widespread 61 years later cobol runs the Social Security administration the v. A. The Treasury Department and many banks use it to process credit Card Transactions in 2020 because i just dont teach it anymore so theres a total lack of expert only one programmer maintained colorados cobol unemployment system before the corona Virus Outbreak and they get by with one dude now now states are calling for cobol volunteers to help with the massive demand on unemployment agencies like with governor of new jersey in our list of volunteers judy no only do we need Health Care Workers but given the legacy systems we should add a page for cobalt. Computer skills because thats what were dealing with but literally we have. Systems that are 40 plus years old and theyll be and theyll be lots of postmortems and one of them on our list will be how the heck did we get here we literally needed cobol programmers did he say cobalt like the color so we dont only desperately need a virus test and ventilators but we also have a shortage of experts in ancient computer language which where is he going to find these people well retirees can get off their boats and volunteer and yes i think he did say cobalt on the bright side theyre offering for shiny nickel an hour for the work plus the state of the art frigidaire. Ok so what does this mean for the stimulus package that is supposed to put more money in the hands of the unemployed now that well the stimulus has weekly increase of 600. 00 on unemployment checks when i get there for a while because states are responsible for distributing the checks and at least 12 states are running their unemployment cobol and antique machinery the floppy disks kid dusty really Many Americans wont receive the relief until months later but im suffering to the why fight is crap here so the relief wont relieve much congress has been making cuts to modernization which costs a lot so its a crisis on a crisis we havent been investing in the systems serving people in poverty because we thought if it aint broke dont fix it and now everyones broke so its very confusing now i need to go make dinner for my husband or beat me legally so if youll excuse me. One minute break thanks sale me naomi campbell. Next up new segment where i get to chat about the news that i didnt get to cover before and with me is my socially distant correspondent Natalie Mcgill thanks for joining me from way over there natalie what do you got well we ive got a warning for our viewers for those of you watching this while quarantining with others you may constantly feel like someone is watching you whether its your child or your cat or the boyfriend or girlfriend you were planning to pick up with before the korean teen and if youre watching this from Baltimore City then you definitely feel like youre being watched after your elected officials just approved a Drone Surveillance Program for cops the spy on you on april fools day baltimore officials approve the deal between the Baltimore Police department and ohio based company Persistent Surveillance Systems to use drones equipped with High Resolution cameras in order to spy on the citys residents through around the clock surveillance the spied for home objections filed by the a. C. L. U. And the legal defense. First of all great name persistent surveillance real subtle subtle about it also if youre from baltimore is this standard april fools day joke or generally an april fools a joke and baltimore is a few switch out somebody is all big canister with like sugar or salt instead of actual. Also the name is perfect i mean i think the only thing that would have been better would have been like stalkers r us and then it would just be like the backwards are from toys r us maybe they can remember blackwater or yeah exactly but the funny thing is actually that name is actually really appropriate Persistent Surveillance Systems because 4 years ago that same company was under heat for flying a spy plane over baltimore to surveil its citizens without them knowing even the city council didnt even know about this but in this case the city council does know and like the public didnt even get any say. In the guinea pigs for all their. Crazy we want to do in this country carol it was just doing to baltimore because they can fight back there you know to a lot of poor people every also looks kind of really up about it its like Everybody Knows how jacked up this Police Department is this is the Police Department thats known for planting or have making sure that their officers have like a toy gun on them oh right case they get you know yeah in case they get like there or making sure that they plant drugs on like suspects so like they already dont have a great relationship with any of their citizens there thats a. Fools joke as killing someone planting a toy go on a gun on them youve got another story yeah so our privacy isnt the only thing at risk of falling to covert 19 in the United StatesPostal Service is on the verge of collapse and 630000 people could lose their jobs because trump refuses to bail them out the Postal Service needs 75000000000. 00 to stay alive but whats being talked about in this is thats because they were forced to pay their pensions like 75. 00 yes in advance yes so theyre like the only industry thats forced to do that basically because the larger republicans wanted to bankrupt them yet Everybody Knows that the United StatesPostal Service is not a business it was never intended to be a business its a service that i never supposed to be let out acts of the i got it going its only saying these Public Libraries are not making a big enough profit have you know to say they are not raking in the dough like they should be its ridiculous i mean at this point were going to have to have like a national slingshot or something like. I mean nothing with class and obviously but no its its a ridiculous and its an absurd standard that no other Government Agency has to handle and i dont think a lot of people realize how screwed we will be without a Postal Service like if youre somebody who has your business is to create tiny jackets for hamsters on etsy. Wow all right natalie thanks so much thank you. And here are your headlines from the future on monday e. S. P. N. Will report 30 percent of pro sports mascots of kill themselves due to lack of audience philly fanatic latest to crush head a with comically large mallet that was a sad story and one week youll learn. With the world on lockdown endangered of why all the water possums have begun living in Donald Trumps hair again thats adorable and in 3 weeks the Washington Post will report some things all the coronavirus something something what bugs is a. Thats our show but if you look at preserve the free to do ad all right now check out my standup comedy special at least camp american dot com and my new book is that lee camp book dot com plus ive been putting up web exclusive videos all the time of you tube god calm so i for dad to deny until next time goodnight and keep fighting. The world is driven by a dream shaped by one person with those great. Things. We dare to ask. That nice stevy song cycle dont play you hate you listen. To the law in the face is fine it can be said usually good if you dont believe its going. To take the safe rule sets walk next you dont. Give a solution safety feature and you move on to the sort of the thief. Oh everyone lets take a look at whats on todays menu to see what straight ahead on the press. We have a few clips