Im seth meyers. This is late night. We hope youre doing well. And now if you dont mind, were going to get to the news today was super tuesday, where 16 states and one territory got together and held an intervention for nikki haley [ light laughter ] in a profile published yesterday in the new yorker. President biden said he will beat former President Trump and added, quote, im the only one who has ever beat him. Well, thats true, unless you count e. Jean carroll, letitia james, covid, the free market, and ramps. Lhlh according to a new report the Trump White House pharmacy would give staffers xanax and speed without prescriptions. Oh, come on. Is there any proof saudi arabia and russia will repetoo oh. [ laughter ] seth ohh thats right, the Trump White House pharmacy would give staffers xanax and speed without prescriptions, and one patient kept asking them, is there such a thing as reverse viagra . [ laughter ] according to a new survey, nearly half of parents keep a pregnancy test or ultrasound image of their child as a keepsake, but be careful, because the Alabama Supreme Court now considers both of those things a person. [ laughter ] an Amazon Warehouse near seattle recently began testing a 59 robot that resembles a human hes so lifelike his tinder profile says hes 61. [ laughter ] a man in wisconsin recently extended his Guinness World record after he ate 728 mcdonalds big macs in 2023. The record was for healthiest man in wisconsin [ laughter ] according to a new survey, 46 of parents said that they would be willing to give up social media to have one more day with their child as a baby. But that drops to 5 when you change it to one more night. [ light laughter ] the Genealogy Company ancestry confirmed yesterday that taylor swift and the late poet Emily Dickinson are related. Okay, i was wondering why Emily Dickinson was at the super bowl [ laughter ] she brought a fan . Photographers in hawaii recently captured images of two male humpback whales having sex, in case youre wondering why mike pence is trying to shut down the beach [ laughter ] and finally, the Startup Company colossal biosciences has announced that its working to genetically bring back the dodo bird, and well know the moment they succeed [ laughter ] [ audience oohs youll try it [ laughter ] were all going to try it that guy in wisconsins going to try it [ laughter ] that was the monologue, everybody, we are off and running [ cheers and applause we have a great show for you tonight. You know him from community, the soup, and he stars in animal control, which returns tonight on fox our friend joel mchale is back on the show. [ cheers and applause one of our favorites and hes a fantastic comedian whose standup special dirt nap is on sale now. Kyle kinane will also be joining us, you guys [ cheers and applause hey, one of my favorite singersongwriters, jeff tweedy is on family trips with the meyers brothers this week give it a listen wherever you get your podcasts. Moving on [ applause ] i dont have to tell you guys, these days the news stinks every headline i see makes me feel worse than the last, but every once in a while theres a story, and you know what, ill just admit it, that makes me feel great id like to share one now in a segment called the kind of story we need right now. [ cheers and applause seth this is logen abney and Tiana Ailstock logen and tiana were engaged to be married, and they were facing the most important question all engaged people face where should we have our wedding did they choose a church, a hotel ballroom, a barn filled with upcycled centerpieces from etsy no, logen and tiana got married in the dopest location of all time a gas station bathroom in verona, kentucky. A gas station bathroom isnt dope, you may say. But it wasnt just any gas station bathroom in this bathroom theres a Big Red Button with a sign next to it that says do not push this button. [ light laughter ] and when you push it, a disco light comes on and music plays this is the kind of story we need right now what a [ bleep ] you to the wedding industry [ laughter ] wedding planners everywhere are like, you need a chocolate fountain and fireworks and 1,000 white doves. And this couple was like, we need a gas station with a button and a list. [ light laughter ] the average couple spends over 30,000 on their wedding not this couple. Thigh might even make money if they bought the right scratch offs so [ light laughter ] what does a wedding in a gas station disco bathroom look like the answer is, cool as hell. Heres the bride walking in. Seth this is the kind of story we need right now most weddings are so boring. You watch your cousin walk down the aisle past all your old ass relatives. These guests got to watch the bride walk past a slushie machine. [ laughter ] just as customers mix flavors at the slushie machine, we gather today to watch logen and tiana mix their lives. For the record, those slushie colors are also the most common colors for bridesmaids dresses [ light laughter ] after the bride walked down the aisle, specifically aisle three, she met her groom in the disco bathroom, where they exchanged the best words ive ever heard through the funky beats through the funky beats and mellow melodies and mellow melodies, i promise to be your partner in every rhythm in life in every rhythm in life logen, in disco bathrooms and on a dance floor of life. And on the dance floor of life i choose you. I choose you. Seth this is the kind of story we need right now [ cheers and applause most wedding vows are like, im going to take care of you when youre sick. These vows are like, were going to [ bleep ] boogie. When they were done exchanging vows, the priest pronounced them man and wife and then they hit the Big Red Button and shared their first dance. [ laughter ] [ audience aws ] right there in front of their friends and family and the paper towel dispenser. Guys, i got to say, not only is it cool that logen and tiana got married in a disco bathroom, its cool that this bathroom exists in the first place. Gas station bathrooms are widely recognized as the worst places on earth theyre disgusting, they smell bad, and usually when you see one on the news its for a murder [ laughter ] but someone in this gas station said, what if we ahead our bathroom a little less bad . And now people are getting married there. Move over, Thomas Edison whoever made this bathroom is historys greatest inventor. Now, you may be thinking, how did they have time to do a whole wedding . Anytime im in a gas station bathroom for more than 2 minutes, i hear the angry pounding of a trucker whos about to crap his pants. Well, to make sure no one tried to use the bathroom while logen and tiana were tying the knot, the gas station put up this sign disco bathroom wedding in session [ laughter ] sorry if any inconvenience. This is the kind of story we need right now [ cheers and applause right there. Usually when a bathroom is out of order its for something gross. This time it was for something beautiful. That sign shouldnt say sorry for the inconvenience, it should say youre welcome for showing you what true love looks like. And look at the fine print free fountain pop on us. [ laughter ] story keeps Getting Better you know everyone in the area was like, youve got to get down to the gas station in verona theyre giving away soda because theyre having a wedding in the can. [ light laughter ] after the ceremony was over, the couple hung out in the Convenience Store with their guests, which frankly sounds like a perfect wedding reception no boring toasts, no bouquet toss, and if you dance too hard, youre never more than three feet away from gatorade and when the reception was over, the couple left the gas station to a parking lot full of applause the crowd was clapping because they were happy for them, and because they had just eaten the best wedding cake of their lives. [ laughter ] ive seen a million weddings in my life, and i have to say, this is my favorite one of all time, because the focus wasnt on a fancy venue or a fancy reception, or a fancy tenpiece orchestra. Instead, this wedding focused on the most important thing love and job opportunities. So [ laughter ] heres to you, logen and tiana, because this is the kind of story we need right now. [ cheers and applause well be right back with joel mchale, everybody here at papa johns, we know our stuff so try our garlic epic stuffed crust pizza. Made with our iconic garlic sauce flavor, mixed with cheese and hand stuffed into that papa johns original dough no one stuffs a crust like papa johns. tony hawk skating for over 45 years has taken a toll on my body. I take qunol turmeric because it helpse with healthy joints and inflammation support. Why qunol . It has superior absorption compared to regular turmeric. Qunol. The brand i trust. Leftover chicken, scallions, cheese. What am i gonna make with this . Mayow mayo . Mayow hellmanns . . You can talk . a Chicken Salad sandwich. God i love you. grace didnt believe in magic. But her daughter was happy to prove her wrong. You were made to dream about it for years. We were made to help you book it in minutes. together is the best way to discover joy kinder joy, open a world of surprise roll up to easter with fast and easy drive up. [ upbeat music plays ] drive up is fast, easy, and always free only at target. Are you taking the right multivitamin . With new chapter, you get excellent quality, organic ingredients, and fermentation. Fermentation . Yes. Feel the difference with 20 plus nutrients your body can absorb. So you can do you. Learn more at newchapter. Com. Outback steakhouse has a new, threecourse meal called the. Aussie aussie aussie all oi oi oi with soup or salad, choice of five entrees and cheesecake for dessert. All oi oi oi . Oi its three. Three ois. Three courses, starting at 16. 99, at outback for a limited time. [ cheers and applause seth give it up for the fantastic 8g band right over there. [ cheers and applause also so exciting, sitting in with us this week, hes the drummer for dream car, and legendary band no doubt. The band is celebrating tragic kingdoms 30th anniversary next year, and will be performing for the first time in nine years at the coachella festival in april. Adrian young is here, everybody. [ cheers and applause so great to have you, adrian, thanks for being here. Our first guest tonight is an emmynominated actor and comedian you know from shows like community, the soup and the bear. He stars in animal control, which returns march 6th on fox please welcome back to the show our friend joel mchale, everybody. [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause what . Seth youve been here before yeah. Seth you know what our vibe is this, wow, its nice to breathe some life into this show [ laughter ] its great to see that you have gym rash on bass right now or on guitar ive got a problem with you, seth seth whats the problem . I notice you dont dress up anymore. Seth no. Except for certain people seth oh, yeah. I do, for certain people like the president . Seth yeah, i did you wore a tie. Seth yeah. And then for letterman, you wore a tie seth yeah. Springsteen, no tie seth yeah, no tie, but i did wear a sports coat for springsteen. But then everybody else, slob seth yeah. [ laughter ] it really shows you how you treat your guests, what does Annette Bening get tomorrow night . Seth youll have to tune in, my friend. Well, okay. [ laughter ] im just going to dress down now. Because, you know seth i mean, know youre a fit guy, but are you regretting the stairs [ laughter ] yeah, i i think i think i got a hole in my heart i im smelling burnt almonds. Seth yeah. And toast, i think. I had a stroke seth did you know the gentlemen that you sort of hug humped that was my no, but i expect to be hearing from his lawyers anytime. [ laughter ] seth oh, no, he already went to h. R. , dont point youre pointing to an empty seat, my friend i didnt think i would get cancelled this way [ laughter ] thats hes thats my uncle bill, everybody. Seth oh, thats so great, uncle bill its not, its not, its not my uncle bill, i dont know that man. Seth yeah. Youre already creating your defense. Youre like, he looked like my uncle bill. We thought he had died in the war. [ laughter ] what war world war ii seth i know. Thank you for having me seth its so good to have you. And we have the drummer from no doubt seth its pretty exciting. [ cheers and applause yeah, he got his haircut for the show seth yeah. I mean, he didnt know i dont wear suits, he was like, i got to do something nice oh, boy seth you and i, were very good friends, we and i think it speaks to our friendship that we managed to get past our football teams to play this year on new years eve. The steelers and the seahawks. I dont know that first team that you said. Seth you just know the seahawks i just know the seahawks. Yes, its the only time i allow tribalism into my life is that i if the seahawks win, i have a great week, and then if they lose, i cut myself seth yeah. [ laughter ] were very similar that way. You seth its an irrational dumb thing. Yep but its the only i allow that in. And uh, i know that, look, your team has been rebuilding for the last 20 years. [ laughter ] and you have a number of its people auditioning for quarterback at this point. No, im sorry, i cant help it, i just hate all other teams. Seth yeah, i feel the same way. And i love that team. Seth its throughout your family your brother is a priest he is a priest. Seth in the bay area hes an episcopal priest so he has sex with his wife [ laughter ] yeah, dont worry about that seth did he ask you to say that to everybody . He was like if you bring it up, just let him know. Yeah, hes constantly telling us, just had sex with my wife, because we can seth because we can. We broke away seth he shes a minister too. Seth oh, really . She can only do hand stuff. [ laughter ] its you know seth why do you go another lap. You do another lap, mchale, think about what you said. You know, lutherans, right . Uh all up in minnesota, just dirty as hell. [ laughter ] i dont know why im picking a fight with the seth i like that youre getting specific to both religions and regions. Do you think the steelers are going to win the super bowl next year seth every year i think. Thats what i think too i think it every year. Seth ill place a wager, you know, if im in vegas for a show ill see what the odds are for them in the super bowl as i place the bet, 801 you suckers, i cant wait when you see my face give me a big old pile of money. Yeah, its dumb. Thats exactly. Im literally like if we lose, which we did this year, maybe once, and i was like, well, next year were going to win. This is it we finally put it together so anyway, my brother. Seth he texted you im taunting my 49ers fans because hes a priest in the bay area in the bay area seth by changing the church colors to blue and green, so these are seahawks colors. Yeah, thats thats my brother. And, yeah, thats you can see he wears the glass frames of a giant. [ laughter ] and thats he posted that, which really shows you his his 49er fan parishioners have seth it does, youre right, those glasses, it looks like he lost a thousand pounds [ laughter ] he looks like hes in a bugs life. [ laughter ] seth you wrote to your priest brother, give them hell [ laughter ] yeah, yeah. I hate the 49ers i hate them. I hate them. Theyre always good. And i hate them. And then when they lost the super bowl because they didnt know the rules at the end, i was like, why are you so happy . [ laughter ] youre such an ass [ bleep ] and i was like, it really gives me joy, its bad. Seth well im glad are you a baseball or basketball seth so i was released from baseball because i was a red sox fan, and once they won, i was just set free. I was like, i have hope. In 2004, i was like, youve given me all i asked for, and im now no longer going to live and die 162 days a year. Yeah, you left seth i felt like the way pinnochio probably felt when he became a real boy. [ laughter ] thats dramatic seth yeah. [ laughter ] it was a lot, man, the red sox thing was a lot. Where do they play . Sorry, i cant help it because im a mariners fan and i dont give a [ bleep ] about anybody else yeah, its seth your boys, we talked about your boys before and this makes me very happy, and by the way, i wonder where they got it. Theyre very sarcastic and mean to you they are, yes, if it would be very odd if they were fans of mine if they were like, dad, you can do no wrong. Seth theyre growing into the age where they can watch community. They do watch community and when theyre like, the episode was really good until you walked in [ laughter ] and theyre like, you know why . And im like why, because you cant act. [ light laughter ] im like, thank you, good. And then my 19yearold, he was like, how do you why do you think weve never bonded . And im like what the what kind of and then hes smiling, hes like, yeah, we dont really know each other. [ laughter ] and im like this is and then the younger one, he if someone walks up to me and wants a photo, he will taunt the fan hell be like, youre going to remember this one, huh . [ laughter ] its just this is a big deal oh, wow, look at you, youre going to remember this. And id be like [ bleep ] you, what the i dont say that, i say [ bleep ] off [ laughter ] so theyre they will watch this, and be like, you know hes going to great, Annette Bening. And they will literally say that [ laughter ] seth i got a lot more questions for you. Be right back with more joel after this [ cheers and applause nothing brings us together like egglands best eggs. Always so fresh and delicious. Plus, superior nutrition. For us, its eggs any style. As long as theyre the best. Egglands best. Your shipping manager left to find themself. leaving you lost. You need to hire. I need indeed. Indeed you do. Indeed instant match instantly delivers quality candidates matching your job description. Visit indeed. 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[chaotic music] [inspirational music] healthcare can get a whole lot easier when your medical records, care and coverage are in one place. At kaiser permanente, all of us Work Together for all that is you. Look, clearly, what ive been doing is not shutting you up, so whats going to take your mind off emily . Whatever that is, thats what were doing today. Really, like my own special day, like shreds day more like a long lunch, but sure whatever i want, you promise not to judge me . Absolutely not, would you ask michelangelo not to sculpt i thought he was more of a nunchuck guy not the ninja turtle. I know. Seth welcome back to late night, here with joel mchale. [ cheers and applause that was a clip from animal control. Yes seth before we get to the show, you did a little real life animal control, you took your family to ireland. Yes, and did the irish are animals. Im half irish, so i can say that seth now what is this . Its a photo of you came across a mud pit yeah, you know, you go to ireland, see all the mud pits. [ laughter ] there, we were in this, i dont know, fjord like place and my kids were like, were bored, theyre bored and your acting is bad, and my sisterinlaw challenged her son to go touch a lamb because theyre all over the place. And east like, i touched one youre like what, they scattered. And he was like, theres two of them trapped in a mud bug. And i was like, wow, what a day were having and so, i saw them, and i was like, this is an opportunity for social media. [ laughter ] and i pulled those lambs out seth wow yeah, i pulled them out [ cheers and applause and then i slow roasted them for six hours. [ laughter ] and it was oh, it was seth worth it . It was so good. It was irish lamb is theres people right now going, oh seth this is something you found in your home region, the pacific northwest. Yes seth this was called a gooey duck yeah, thats a gooey duck, so thats thats why you know that god is real, because he was drunk and was like, im going to make a clam penis, and make it look kind of like a odd duck but that is this is where it breathes and spits, and it is in only in the northwest would we eat it all the time. And it isa delicacy and yeah, so that is a gooey duck. Seth have you had them, are they actually good oh yeah, i slap it in my face thats how you eat them, you slap them around [ laughter ] sorry. My mom is going to watch this and go, it was fine until you got dirty. [ laughter ] yeah, thats a delicacy. Its really it actually is quite good thats on Vashon Island where my wife grew up yeah, just [ bleep ] everywhere. Seth there you go. [ light laughter ] have you ever had gooey duck . Seth no, ive never had a gooey duck, i dont think id want one is that a challenge seth how are you going to get me to eat it i dont know. Seth all right [ light laughter ] you animal control, a lot of people will say, you know, dont work with animals, dont work with kids. You have obviously skip that lesson yeah. Seth how have your costar animals been theyve been good, weve had a lot of cool we had lemurs and bobcats and all these cool but we worked with a sloth, ive never really been scared except for the sloth. Seth which is interesting because a lot of people would be the least scared of a sloth. Right and when the trainer, he was like, a lot of people think sloths are slow and friendly and he was like, this one is neither. [ laughter ] and im like, im so glad we have this one. And it was this big. It was as big as a golden retriever, and we i was climbing on this rock wall to try and pretend like i was saving it because its hanging off doing some rock climbing and it did a very good job but its eyes are completely black, and they look its looking like youre looking into the abyss of space. Then, it has fangs that if someone took real fangs and took a hammer, smashed them all up and then put them back inside of an animal, it is and then it smiles at you. [ laughter ] and, uh, and the trainer was he i was like, how close can i get . And hes like, youre close enough now. [ light laughter ] and i was like, have you been bit . He goes, yeah, i have a lot of pictures of it. I was like, again, this is great. [ laughter ] and im glad that were working with the and then he ate like bananas whole with the peel, which was disturbing, the most disturbing thing ive ever seen [ laughter ] and we dated for like two weeks. [ laughter ] seth yeah. Its great i think i saw that in us weekly. We had gooey ducks in vancouver. [ light laughter ] it was good. But yeah, its fun, do you like animals . Seth eh. So if like do you have the trainers on to seth we had the trainers, and it actually was a sloth. I had a moment, the last animal we had on, true story, im not just saying this, a sloth. I made eye contact with the sloth and i had this real sense, he doesnt want to be here right seth i know that like the trainers are like this is cool, were teaching people about sloths i think the sloth was like im good with nobody here knowing anything about me. Okay. Seth i my anonymity in that world and the fingernails on it seth yeah bad looking fingernails. Theyre this big and they make a tapping noise like they have live beatles. Seth thats how i knew he wasnt having fun as he did this the whole time [ laughter ] is this almost over . He was like, this guy didnt wear a sport coat so im not [ laughter ] seth you, season one of the show that really and season two was also excellent you had a cameo on the bear. Yes, yeah seth i was very excited when i saw it i remember i wrote you right away you played a real bad chef you mean the hero seth okay, so you believe you are the hero, you are carms former employer. Ive never seen the show so i dont its freaking its no yeah i was portraying chef thomas keller. Hes going to be so happy im saying these things, and poison me if i ever meet him. But yeah, i dont think hes as awful as i was, but he does whisper at his employees seth oh, really . Yeah. You ever go behind walk up to elon and go like, you call this keyboarding, what is this . Seth oh, you mean do i whisper during the show . Yeah, no, i just text them yeah you [ bleep ] it up again [ laughter ] my favorite songs, yeah, no, its the guy who chris store who wrote that show is the boyfriend of Gillian Jacobs who was seth of course on community. On community and he asked if i would come in and get Hair Transplants for the show and i was like absolutely, and wear these same glasses, so, no, it was really fun and i found it really interesting that he the bear won best comedy, and succession won best drama. Seth yeah. And i was like, i feel like seth its true theyre both wonderful shows, and it is weird how i do feel like one is just half an hour and one is an hour and poor Abbott Elementary is in the middle and theyre like what the [ bleep ]. Were right here, its really fun to be on the show. Seth its always such a delight to have you here, buddy. Thank you so much for making the time oh, im not leaving this is still going. [ cheers and applause well be right back with joel mchale. Seth animal control thank you for having me guys. Seth starts march 6th. Well be right back with more late night. [ cheers and applause oldest girl someday, ill be the first female president. Of the universe. middle boy someday, im gonna marry my baseball glove. Probably in vegas. youngest girl someday, ill help all balloon animals roam free. vo there are a lot of miles between today and someday. Your longlasting threerow Subaru Ascent will get your family there. 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You know those mornings becau when it takes just acare little bit extra to get you out of bed . This might be it. Wake up to the goodness of jimmy dean. [traffic noise] [text message] lets ace this thing i got you coffee. Oh my god, what . You literally read my mind. Got you, girl. This is decision 2024, super tuesday. Here are lester holt and savannah guthrie. Good evening, everyone. Welcome to our nbc News Coverage of super tuesday. This is a decisive night that will shape the 2024 race for president with residents in 16 states and one u. S. Territory cassing their votes today to determine their partys nominee. Determine their partys nominee. It is shaping up to be a big smelling ew. Gotta get rid of this. Tell me why because it stinks. Have you tried downy rinse and refresh it helps remove odors 3x better than detergent alone. It worked guys yeahhhh downy rinse and refresh. My frequent heartburn had me taking antacid after antacid all day long but with prilosec otc just one pill a day blocks heartburn for a full 24 hours. For one and done heartburn relief, prilosec otc. One pill a day, 24 hours, zero heartburn. [ cheers and applause seth welcome back to late night. Have you guys noticed the recent trend of online product testing articles they are everywhere. For example this one New York Times after testing 23 knife sharpeners we found the best one. And this one, after testing 32 air fryers, this one crisps food the best. Well, we here at late night wanted to get in on the game and make sure that you know which baking sheet is the best one out of all the options on the market so we asked our writer, john lutz to test 48 different baking sheets. [ light laughter ] in our new segment, john lutz product tester. [ cheers and applause [ light laughter ] why would you make me do this seth its my show and i want people to find the best baking sheet. Who cares about baking sheets seth people in the market for baking sheets. No ones in the market for baking sheets you just buy a baking sheet seth people deserve to know what the best one is theyre baking sheets they all look the [ bleep same [ light laughter ] they all work the [ bleep same, theres no best, theres no worst actually, this ones pretty bad. [ laughter ] its not good at all seth which ones that . No, im not participating in this all right, so the cooper ultra nonstick ceramic baking sheet and im only giving it two out of five rolling pins [ ding ] [ light laughter ] seth you have a grading scale . Well, just because i hated doing this doesnt mean im going to do a bad job, okay. Seth why only two out of five well, okay. Durable nonstick coating just on the interior and not the exterior, cant be above 550 degrees in the oven, is this a baking sheet or a [ bleep ] paper plate . [ laughter ] seth see now viewers can eliminate that one. Is that the only one that can eliminate . [ light laughter ] yes okay well, this one stinks too seth okay. Is it also nonstick theyre all nonstick, seth all of them. At this point, every pan in the world is nonstick its 2024, seth. Good lord can i just review it, please seth sure. One out of five rolling pins. Seth why well, okay, well, look, the rolled edges arent thick enough to prevent warping and the heat distribution is so off its like what are we even doing here, folks. Seth lutz, ive got to say it sound like you really got into this. No, no. Okay, actually, this ones really, really good. This one here, this one sits better than this one, better than this one, and better than this one oh, well, this ones good if you want to make horse [ bleep ] on it you want to bake horse [ bleep ]. Are you a horse [ bleep baker seth [ laughter ] cause thats the one you want for horse [ bleep ]. Seth do you want to talk about one of the good ones no. Okay, but if i were id say this one right here gets four out of five rolling pins seth oh, four out of five. I know, right seth not all of them, is it the best maybe seth is there one thats maybe better maybe [ light laughter ] seth one that if someone wanted to buy a baking sheet, youd recommend more highly than all the others one that mixes affordability and technology effortlessly . Seth yes, one that does that yes, yes theres one that does that, of course there is theres always a best in life, theres always a best one, where is it . [ cookie sheet banging ] this is it [ light laughter ] this baking sheet is special seth can i see it . Dont you touch it. [ light laughter ] seth whats it called . This is the nordic ware natural aluminum commercial bakers half sheet and its if its as if christ died for our sins so that this pan could exist. Seth if you want to talk about the specs no, yes, no, of course yeah, of course i do seth the floor is yours. Okay, food bakes evenly its got reenforced steel rims that prevent warping, and add strength it adds strength, seth, it adds it [ laughter ] seth is it affordable . Yes [ laughter ] yes, yes, yes, its affordable its only 21. Its cheap its cheap compared to compared to this [ bleep ] monstrosity. [ light laughter ] look at this thing look at how small you could cook one cookie on this [ bleep ] piece of [ bleep ] why is it red . [ laughter ] seth arent you glad we did this i dont know. Seth well, were going to do it again next month with 86 coat hooks. [ laughter ] product tester john lutz. Well be right back with more late night [ cheers and applause i splurged a little because Liberty Mutual customized my Car Insurance and i saved hundreds. Thats great. I know, right . Ive been telling everyone. Baby liberty. Did you hear that . Ty just said her first word. Can you say mama . Baby liberty. Can you say auntie . Baby liberty. How many people did you tell . Only pay for what you need. 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You lasted longer than most. Mayow you made a cow actually its a piggy bank. My inspiration to start saving. How about a more solid way to save . Im listening. Well, bmo helps get your savings habit into shape with a cash reward, every month you save. Both cash reward . And theres a cash bonus when you open a new Checking Account to get you started. Wow. Anything you cant do . mugs. Bmo [ cheers and applause seth our next guest is a very funny comedian you know from shows like those who cant. He is currently on his its not a tour, its the job tour, and his latest standup special dirt nap is on sale now. Lets take a look. Like my dad still my dad will still have a steak with a glass of milk. [ light laughter ] yeah you trying to put it back together inside of you whats [ laughter ] some sort of culinary ship in a bottle youre trying to build down there yeah, i got an idea, lets get your old racing leathers on, you can cosplay the whole [ bleep ] thing, how about that . [ laughter ] seth please, welcome to the show kyle kinane, everybody. [ cheers and applause seth welcome to the show, kyle thanks for having me, you guys swear a lot more. Seth we do we realized early on no one was paying attention thats yeah, i kind of picked that up seth its very jarring when even when backstage to say hello, when i first walked in i assumed you were not there yet, because your beard, your very iconic beard is off. Im between looks [ laughter ] every three or four years ive got to shave, just to make sure i still have the same jaw line as a dachshund [ laughter ] still just top teeth and an adams apple all right, great seth dirt nap is a unique title for a standup special yeah. Seth and its also the name of your cat. Yeah, yeah. All right, p little dirty, shes up there in heaven now it was a stray cat that was living in the yard of this house we moved into. And you cant really name a stray cat, so it went through some iterations, at first we were calling it helen. We thought it was blind and deaf [ light laughter ] so my girlfriend named it that [ laughter ] my girlfriend named it that, so youre not mad at me, youre mad at her and then i was calling it dirt nap on account of, you know, it would just sleep in the dirt and it looked deceased like most of the time. [ laughter ] seth and how many so it seemed like you maybe didnt get a lot of good years with dirt nap. We got three great years, ill tell you. Seth thats pretty good. We found out it was a 16yearold cat it was a 16yearold stray cat that were like, were going to give this thing the best sunset we can give it. Seth well thats fantastic you did that we loved that little crabapple hanging out there. Seth youre on the road all the time, but you recently got a house in the burbs youre living in the portland suburbs. No, thats the chicago burbs. I wear this hat because i hear, youre from chicago where . Im like, out where the tornado starts. Yeah, im living easy now, man seth do you like burb living i think so. Like, ive never owned a home before in my life, and so its i always said i was going to rent forever. And then now i like theres a freedom in renting that i know is like an issue but now if i clog my toilet, its my toilet seth yeah. And there was like a nice power shift when someone you refer to as a lord, you have to call to come unclog a toilet excuse me, my leej, can you lay down your septer, dominos was having a two for one last night. [ laughter ] i really bricked this bitch out, so you might want to roll the sleeves up on that golden robe [ laughter ] seth this is very sweet. I think its true of a lot of people in comedy, you usually have one or two parents who are into comedy, and your mom would let you stay up late, would watch carson with you. Yeah, i would watch Johnny Carson as a little kid, which my Kindergarten Teacher thought was irresponsible parenting. So seth i would say its pretty late at night for a kindergartner. Well, you had kindergarten that started in the morning and one that started in the afternoon. I was in the one that started in the afternoon. My mom is a night owl. So, shes like, well, im watching Johnny Carson im up my kid may as well with up watching Johnny Carson with me. And so i would watch, you know and i didnt even know what standup was. And youd have bands, or you would have actors that were on it, but then you just have one person show up at the end and just talk. And im like, thats the job . Ill just do that. I wont even worry about the tvs or the movies or learning instruments. Ill just do the talking part, and then ill be cool. Seth but you did do the instrument part for a little bit. You actually have a similar trajectory to our band leader fred armisen, who was in a band called trench mouth. He was a drummer for them. And then he thought music was going to be his thing, and found his way into comedy. You were in a punk band as well. Yeah, yeah. Grand marquee, shout out to any five people out there, four of the guys who were in the band watching this, and my sister who came to the shows, thank you yeah, it was you know, it was just like you just thats what you did nobody had any futures youre from the suburbs, youre going to burn out. Lets be in a band and then standup comedy came around like i dont have to load any gear or organize find out what three other drunks are going to do this weekend ill just do the standup thing. Seth do you love i would imagine having been in a band, nothing the better than doing a standup show where you do your sound check and its literally 30 seconds oh, every sound guy at every venue loves standup i was misinterpreting it as like the people that work at the venue really like my comedy. Theyre like, no, they just like that you dont have to sound check five hours before the show. And deal with the temperaments of six different people on a crew like, we love your act. Funny . No, no, youre just easy to work with. Thats all, we dont care. [ laughter ] humor is not for me but just one microphone, its on, i go take a nap. Its fine. [ laughter ] seth do you have early theres a lovely craft to a lot of stuff you do. But we always see the stuff that works, and early comedy, you have a lot of stuff that you put a lot of heart into, but then it fails with the audience. Yeah. I mean, those are the best jokes, though. Seth yeah. You got one that we all saw the baking pan sketch you guys were having fun, right . Seth yeah. [ laughter ] i could tell you guys were having a blast seth we had a lot of fun who cares about them . You guys had fun seth i dont know whos going to die first, lutz or i, but were going to talk about it at the funeral [ laughter ] thats okay, that was the joke i was at a wake, which is, you know, always youre just thinking comedy at a wake. [ light laughter ] and i was in you know like Funeral Homes have like break rooms in them. Where you get coffee and like seth cause people are still working. Ive been grieving for four hours, union rules, ive got to go take i got to get a smoke and a coffee so theres like theres like that, i was in that area and then Funeral Homes will, like, like businesses sponsor Little League teams, and you always put the pictures out and so this funeral home sponsors a Little League team, and they had all the pictures of different Little League teams up with the name of the funeral home on the jerseys. And it was i wrote it down. Theres got to be something funny. And then i realized so the joke was that like my grandfather and my father both served in the military i did not serve in the military, but i was on a Little LeagueTeam Sponsored by a funeral home, so i do know the honor involved in wearing a uniform that thousands of people have died for [ laughter ] and it like okay, you guys are laughing now, but you should have checked in with me 20 years ago. Seth did we switch out the audiences after the pan sketch [ laughter ] thats im like this ones great and people are like, boo, you werent there. No, i wasnt, that was the point of the joke. Oh, whatever seth congratulations, the eighth special thats really impressive congratulations on that. Thank you, thank you, thank you. [ cheers and applause seth thank you so much for being here, kyle such an honor. Kyle kinane, everybody dirt nap is available on 800 pound gorilla. For more info go to kylekinane. Com well be right back. [ cheers and applause no two bodies are the same. Some pads, never got that message. But, always flexfoam did it protects against different flows for up to zero leaks. And it flexes to fit all bodies, for up to zero feel. Feel it yourself with always flexfoam. Upbeat music deep breath. Cancer is a journey you dont take alone. You did it our Cancer Care Team works together to care for all that is you. You can make money the hard way as a bullfighter or a human cannonball. Or save money the easy way, with xfinity mobile. Existing customers can get a free line of our most popular unlimited plan for a year not only will you save hundreds but youll also be joining millions who have connected to americas most reliable 5g network. Sure is a lot safer than becoming a stuntman for money. Get a free line of unlimited intro for a year when you buy one unlimited line. Visit xfinitymobile. Com today to learn more. [ cheers and applause seth i want to thank my guests joel mchale and kyle kinane everybody. I want to thank adrian young and the 8g band. Thank you for watching we love you everybody. [ cheers and applause