Announcer tonight on late night with seth meyers. Russell crowe. From a. P. Bio, actor and comedian, Patton Oswalt. Music from the lemon twigs featuring the 8g band with thomas land. And now seth meyers. Seth welcome to late night. Hows everybody doing . The sea captain just found out im leaving after this week and now he is not speaking to me or as my family keeps trying to tell me, hes never been speaking to me well, last night was the first night of the Democratic NationalConvention Republican edition seriously, what was going on last night you couldnt gather that many republicans if you were giving away golf pants at the marina. During her speech at last nights Democratic National convention, former First Lady Michelle Obama said, quote, let me be as honest and clear as i possibly can. Which was then followed by extensive bleeping donald trump is the [ bleep ][ bleep ] for [ bleep ][ bleep ] seth during her speech at last nights Democratic National convention, former First Lady Michelle Obama said President Trump is quote, the wrong president for our country. Thats putting it mildly like its just a bad match or something. You are not a good president for us, but there are plenty of countries out there for you. What about mordor, gilead . During her Democratic NationalConvention Speech last night, former First Lady Michelle Obama wore a necklace that read vote and of course its already been plagiarized, be vote. President trump said today he will posthumously pardon susan b. Anthony, who was arrested and fined for illegally voting in 1872 incidentally, susan b. Anthony is what trump thinks happens during gender reassignment surgery. The Trump Administration announced yesterday it had approved a plan to drill for oil and gas in the Arctic NationalWildlife Reserve in alaska and if you think thats bad, Bernie Sanders has been single handedly chopping down the rain forest i guess we finally know the answer to the riddle, how much wood would a socialist chop if a socialist could chop wood. Look at all that firewood. Its like he listened to folklore once and thought, yeah, i could live that life former Vice President , joe biden held a virtual fundraiser today with tom hanks unfortunately it was with virtual tom hanks. [ shudder rapper cardi b interviewed former Vice President joe biden yesterday and discussed health care, Free Education and tax breaks overall, an unexpectedly dryass conversation my favorite joke of the day, maybe the week its only tuesday, but thank you, ally hord new York Governor Andrew Cuomo said yesterday that gyms can reopen next week at one third capacity but lets face it, even if they cut capacity to one tenth, there could still be a naked guy blocking your locker a man in chicago was arrested last week, after he allegedly tried to break into an atm while Live Streaming the crime on his phone. Even dumber, he kept calling it an atm machine yes, like one of the automated atm machines a man in china was recently knocked unconscious after a cat fell from a balcony onto his head said the cat, thats right, i fell. A pair [ laughter ] that was my sly cat. A pair of sneakers worn by Michael Jordan broke a record last week when they were sold for 615,000 said the winner, wait a minute, baseball cleats . That is the monologue. Youre welcome weve got a great show for yout. Russell crowe will be here plus i will be chatting with our friend Patton Oswalt about the new season of a. P. Bio thats coming to peacock in a few weeks. And well have music from the lemon twigs. But first President Trump has tweeted a lot of ridiculous things recently but perhaps the most ridiculous was this tweet from thursday, ive done more for women than just about any president in history. Here to talk about it is one of our writers, amber ruffin. Hi, seth. Seth hi, amber what do you think about trump saying hes done more for women than any american president in history . I think hes correct. Seth you dont disagree with that statement why should i . Its true seth it is it is seth how is that possible . What has he done what has trump done for women . Well he did this he did tha he did thi and this and this dont you forge about that seth but those are all bad things he didnt say hes done good things for women, he just said no president has done more and he is right. No president has done more for women. To make our lives worse hes done thi hes done that he said this and this and this dont you forge about that seth wow, that is a lot. It sure is. Seth do you have more . Seth, i could do this forever he also did thi and this and thi and this and thi and dont forget he did thi and this and this and this and dont you ever forge he did thi and this seth wow, thats more than a lot. Hmmmm. Seth so, are you done . Nuhuh. Seth okay. He also did thi he did thi can you believ he did this most of all he did this he did that thats what he did seth thanks, amber well be right back with more late night. Adventure. To reconnect and be together. And once we did that, we realized his greatest adventure is just beginning. vo welcome to the most adventurous outback ever. The allnew subaru outback. Go where love takes you. Tmobiles new offer on iphone 11 pro is even better on our most powerful signal. Switch and get two new lines of unlimited for only 90 and 2 iphone 11 pros on us. Only at tmobile. Scratch that, baby, im grateful. Ankf l. Gotta say, its really been a while. But now i got back that smile. Smil check everything off the list with jeans from 8 and tees from 4. Get ready for school at target. We gave new dove men care to mike who transforms homes for those in need. I feel comfortable and protected all day long. Dove men care 48h freshness with triple action moisturizer. Im going to start the bidding at 5. Thank you, sir. 6 over there going once. Going twice. Sold dont get mad get e trade and get more than just trading investing. Banking. Guidance. And get more than just trading im a verizon engineer and im part of the Team Building 5g ultra wideband. Its already available in parts of select cities and its rolling out in cities around the country. 25x faster than todays 4g networks. Its the fastest 5g in the world. This is 5g built right. Ok, so, magnificent mile for me i thought i was managing. My moderate to severe Crohns Disease. Yes until i realized something was missing. Me. You ok, sis . My symptoms kept me from being there for my sisters. Flight boarding for flight 2007 to chicago. So i talked to my doctor and learned. Humira is for people who still have symptoms of Crohns Disease after trying other medications. And the majority of people on humira saw significant symptom relief. And many achieved remission in as little as 4 weeks. Humira can lower your ability to fight infections. Serious and sometimes fatal infections, including tuberculosis, and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened, as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. Tell your doctor. If youve been to areas where certain fungal infections are common and if youve had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections. Or have flulike symptoms or sores. Dont start humira if you have an infection. Be there for you, and them. Ask your doctor about humira. With humira, remission is possible. If you cant afford your medicine, abbvie may be able to help. Seth awardwinning musician, thomas lang, is sitting in with the 8g band this week. Hes currently on the cover of the august edition of modern drummer magazine. And headlining the virtual modern drummer festival on live by live september 12th. He also Just Launched a brand New California based Music Education company, nine beats usa, check it out, at ninebeatsusa. Com thanks for joining us, thomas. Our first guest tonight is an oscarwinning actor you know from films like l. A confidential, gladiator, and a beautiful mind. He stars in unhinged, which is in theaters august 21st. Heres my conversation with russell crowe. Welcome back, russell. How are you . Im pretty good, seth how have you been . You look great, man. Seth ive been very well having a summer time. You must have somewhere that you can get out in the sunshine. Seth yes we are at one of the nice things about this situation is finish the show a little early and get out in the sun i cant complain cool. Seth you is it is accurate to say that you are currently in the bush as it is as its called im deep in the bush, seth. [ laughter ] seth yeah. Here in my place, im in northern New South Wales seth all right and for those who know a little bit about australian geography, im seven hours north of sidney by car and about two hours south of byron bay so, its a sub tropical rain forest area, but it was cleared in the mid 1800s well, my particular place was, part of it anyway. So, i have about half pasture and half trees seth sounds wonderful. Since sounds very relaxing. Something that is not relaxing, russell, is the film unhinged. Right [ laughter ] seth people who are looking to just forget about their troubles, i would say, unhinged is a film to make you realize your troubles could be so much worse. [ laughter ] yeah. I think it really puts things in perspective in that way, for sure and what im getting back from people, is that funny thing that, you know, no matter where you live, whether its in america or australia, you know, through europe, wherever you know, everybodys been affected in their own way by the situation that were all sharing, you know. But this thing, this perverse human thing theyre wanting to go in the cinema, and sit in a room and share some extreme experience with other people but, you know, its kind of defined by the fact that crazy stuff just happens on the screen seth yes not actually in your real life so you can walk away from it you know, so thats the vibe im getting back from people who are seeing the film at the moment. Its kind of like, it fills you full of stress for 90 minutes, but then you come out the other side of it and that adrenaline goes through your body and its like, right, lets have some fun. [ laughter ] seth you have a i should say, the movie is kind of it is sort of action packed, and it is a movie pretty absent of humor. Yet i have seen you do some very funny promos for this film what made you guys think because i found them incredibly endearing, and made me want the see the movie even more because it is a reminder that, you know, this is just a movie what made you guys decide to do promos like that well its an unfortunate character, you know, sometimes you are playing a bad guy, and you can do a little nod and a wink to the audience, you know you do something extreme, and you know that even in the moment of terror they are going to find that funny you cant really do that with this guy, you know seth yeah, no. His actions have no justification. He is like, just a violent rampage driven by his own self, you know, his own lack of humanity so, you cant really do that but in the selling of the film in the reminding people of, you know, its still a cinema experience its not a documentary this isnt real life this is, you know, just something extreme that you can experience in the selling of it, you know, i just started getting the idea that maybe we can have just a little bit more fun. Seth yeah. You know, we didnt have to be so serious about it at this point, you know. And i was discussing that with the studio, and we talked about it even while we were shooting but by the time that sort of idea of freedom and fun like that had gone through that machination of, you know, the decision by committee. So 15 people have now looked at this idea. So they bring the idea back to me, and it was just not a fun idea anymore its like [ laughter ] so i thought i would just film an example of what i meant by having fun and they actually really got into it, man so, they just started to use something i did as a personal joke, as something to sell the film so its pretty funny seth its nice to hear that, and that would explain how authentic it feels because it theres something really natural and fun about it. I also i wanted to ask, because obviously, you know, you had a very well established career in australia before we first laid eyes on you over here mmhmm. Seth what when you first showed up in the states, like, what sort of genre of film, now that weve seen you in all genres, what genre did people expect you to, you know, excel at when you first got here im pretty sure nobody expected me to excel at anything, man. You know [ laughter ] people forget, its like bunch of time where i was going in and out of america to, you know, meet people whatever and im still working at other places, and coming in to america. I used to say, my theory of los angeles was that you have to be careful because they will nice you to death. You know they will nice you so much, that you think everything is going to go well for you, and then you realize x amount of time later that you got nothing out of all that niceness. You know it took me probably about 18 months or more and, you know, literally hundreds and hundreds of meetings before i actually got an american gig. And i only got it because sharon stone had seen a movie i was in, and she was doing her first gig as a producer on a film called the quick and the dead. And she was kind of in a sword fight with, you know, the male producers on the film. And she just put her foot down and said, im going hire the person i want to hire as the Love Interest kind of thing, you know and i mean, if it wasnt for her strength of commitment, i dont know how long it might have been she going through a really difficult time at the moment i saw that on social media you know, she has had a few relatives, you know, pass away with coronavirus and shes got seth yeah, she has yeah, so seth i didnt realize that she was one of your first lifelines in the movie industry. Was there an australian actor who had succeeded in the states that you sort of looked to before you made the leap well, you know, when people [ laughter ] oh, i see where youre going [ laughter ] thanks for that. Thats a much better feat. Thank you. I could go [ laughter ] i havent been doing that joke since the early 90s. But you know, so ill bring it back out of retirement dust it off. [ laughter ] yeah, cause people people used to say to me all the time, you know, now that you are working in america, we see you as the new mel gibson, you know and my attitude was that mels pretty much okay by himself. You know what i mean if you want to compare me to an australian actor, could you compare me to judy davis because i think her body of work is stronger [ laughter ] seth it is the most wonderful, i mean that was a very bad delivery of what used to be a fun joke. Seth but, it is really i think, its given a hundred guesses, very few of us would land on judy davis and yet, she is an actor of such skills, that i can see why you would [ laughter ] why you would choose her yeah. She was definitely an inspiration to me at the time. Seth thats great. Hey, it is the 20th anniversary of gladiator, which is insane, because it does feel you know, i think when you do period pieces, like, you kind of forget how much time has passed, cause its not like it reminds you of the year it came out. But i know you have teenage sons now. Do they are they drawn to the film they tell me off every time i tell stories about them on any kind of media. You know but, you know, youre a dad and you just sometimes your kids say stuff thats just so cute. Its fantastic when my little one, who is not little anymore, he is 14 and hes got a mustache. And so, you know, we have to make sure that we clarify that he goes to the gym every day, and he is a very committed young fellow but when he was little, he insisted on watching gladiator, because his friends at school had told him that they had seen gladiator, you know but i think he was only like five or six. Seth yeah. And im like, man, its [ laughter ] this is too much for you right now. Seth thats way [ laughter ] thats way too early yeah, and he is like, dad. You know i know who i am. And blah, blah, blah and i can handle it. And blah, blah, blah, you know and if such a such has seen it, then i should be able to see it. So, you know, he made sort of a deal out of it and, you know, so off we went, and we took him down to where the tv is, and i put the film on, and we sort of had a little Screening Room here that is separated from where we eat dinner, you know and he is supposed to be watching that film so, we are going to have dinner late, you know so about 20 minutes or something, into after i left him, he is back in the main house. You know and my mother is like, um, oh, darling, i thought you were watching dads movie. And hes like, oh, grandma, that thats awful all that happens all that happens, dads just yelling at everybody. He just yells atrybody and then, they run over this kid, and its just the worst movie thats ever been made. So, his first review wasnt positive i think he has seen it since then seth you just have to give him time theyre actually seth russell, its always a pleasure very honest with everything of mine that they see. And that sounds way better than it really is [ laughter ] seth i believe that. Having kids now im starting to see how that could be problematic. Russell, its always a pleasure to see you congrats on the film, and hopefully we will see you back in the states soon cheers, seth. Look after yourself. Stay safe. Seth well be right back with Patton Oswalt so im gonna hold on promoting you this quarter, cool . Drop the taco, get in the car. Does this sentra feel like a compromise to you . Wait what . The handling, its good right . No compromise there. Nope. Watch this. Brie brie. sfx rab beeps rear automatic braking. So if this Nissan Sentra isnt gonna compromise why should you . Youre right that a girl. The all new Nissan Sentra. 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Tell your doctor about an infection or symptoms, if your inflammatory bowel disease symptoms develop or worsen, or if youve had a vaccine or plan to. Serious allergic reactions may occur. Learn more at cosentyx. Com. Come on tucker, lets go. K . Tuck, tuck, do you want a walk boy . Tucker, do you want to go out . When the whole family needs an excuse to get out, nutros clean recipe will help your dog keep up. Honey, did you hear about these new geico savings . Mom . Youll get an extra 15 on top of what geico could already save you. Can i call you back . You know your fathers learning to make sourdough. Even though he knows i prefer rye theres never been a better time to save with geico. Switch by october seventh for an extra 15 on car and motorcycle insurance. Hey, next time lets do a face call seth our next guest is an Emmy Awardwinning comedian you know from his work in ratatouille, the king of queens, and veep. He stars in a. P. Bio. The third season premiers september 3rd on peacock lets take a look. You okay with covering for me now . Absolutely. Im a principal of the school, i can answer a couple of calls im probably going to kick back and finish my book you are okay, divorcee adventuress in singlehood. Good, you are doing the work. Do you mind if i take the keyboard cleaner im really sweating it up. I am, ralph youre going to be fine seth heres my conversation with our friend, Patton Oswalt seth welcome back to the show, patton thanks for having me back, seth its so good to be back. Hey, man seth you joined a very elite club of people who have managed to be on the show twice since we left the studio. Wow that is seth yeah. That is, um, an honor seth true story. I believe its you and kamala harris. So [ laughter ] for real . Seth for real. Well, theres something i can that will be an ice breaker if i ever get to meet her. Seth yeah, you hit both an attic show and a captains quarter show so, well done. Thank you seth thank you for your loyalty and friendship in these times of need. Uhhuh. Seth i want to congratulate you on something else. Your wonderful standup special was nominated for best writing for a variety special was i guess the category we are both nominated in the same category. I was going to say, who else was nominated for best writing oh, my god, lobby baby. Seth yeah. So hilarious. And again, that the i remember the first time i heard the whole lobby baby story im amazed, like, you could have turned that in to like a oneman show seth yeah. Like, that is one hysterical story in a group of other hysterical stories that you have that special, i so needed the goofiness and silliness and sweetness of that, so, thank you. Seth i think the best thing a child can do is give you an experience that you as a comedian can monetize. And that thats right. [ laughter ] your baby has a, an emmynominated special named after seth yeah. You did something really cool. We were talking before this started alice, its her first day in fifth grade today, yes . And you did a very cool dad thing for her. You got her skateboard lessons from perhaps the best person you could can possibly get skateboard lessons from. Yes, her first skateboard lesson was with tony hawk. And its not, this is not me, you know, having resources and access he we follow each other on insta and twitter, and he dmed me and i said, you know, my wife and i, had been watching the documentary, ill be gone in the dark and we really, really love it and if your daughter would like some skateboard equipment, id love to send her some stuff. And then i said, you know what i will take, and roll the dice on being a jerk and i said, look, tony, absolutely, she would love that. Because she really does want a skateboard she is wanting to skateboard im like, but, is there any way, and i will bring her to you, can she get a skateboarding lesson from you . And he was like, oh, my god, that would be great. And we he has a warehouse in san diego full of half pipes and him and andy mcdonald, another legend, were just teaching her, and showing her skate stuff. And you could see like they were showing her basic stuff and then they would do crazy half pipes. Andy mcdonald did a flip in the air, in the like, went to the top half, did a flip and managed to get his feet back on his skateboard and then land back it was it was insane. Seth i think the other thing that is incredible hearing that story is you realize like, how few people were the best in their field when we were young yeah. Seth that still are to like now, four generations i mean, its crazy you know, the fact that alice would be excited about tony hawk the same way that i would have been when i was alices age is just lets tip our caps to tony hawks longevity. And the fact that he is 50, and is doing tricks that teens cant do it was, it was ridiculous the he looked like a cgi thing for a while. It didnt really look like it was real it was amazing seth you mentioned that he reached out about the documentary, ill be gone in the dark, which is about your late wife michelles sort of efforts to, you know, find, reveal the Golden State Killer there was a crazy bit of circumstance back in the studio, i guess, a year ago now. Where you were on the show to promote your works and that morning the Golden State Killer was arrested which was an incredibly surreal thing. And now im assuming theres this extra surreal element of there being a documentary that is obviously documenting something you lived through. Have you been able to engage with the material, or is it too painful . Ive only been able to watch the first four episodes. I mean, i had to watch them in roughs when we were making them. And then after episode four, i called up liz garbus, the director, and i just said, i cannot i cant do this. I cant watch anymore. I hope you understand. And she goes, i totally get it. Dont worry about it uh, you dont have to do this. My my wife and daughter went out front to take their first day fifth grade picture and now they just locked themselves out. Can you give me a second im going to go let them in. Theyre literally five feet away dont edit this out. Seth i wont edit this out oh [ shouting ] it was i mean, im really happy that youve got a cartoon doorbell sound i swear to god i have not heard that actual doorbell since a looney toons cartoon you went fully up and down the doorbell scale oh, my god. [ laughter ] they locked themselves out okay seth let me just speak to what a perfect bit of comedy it is that we were talking about a very real, very traumatic thing, and then the puncturing of that was the longest door bell i have ever heard and i think you and i can both appreciate that was that sometimes life is perfect, comedy timing as well. It could not have been more perfectly timed to burst that bubble [ laughter ] oh, god. Seth i do it must be special to know you know, i feel like theres been theres been these waves of appreciation for what michelle has done, right . Like there was the book and the arrest, and now, you know, this incredible documentary that tells the story. Yeah. Seth it must be special to know that people will continue to have this appreciation for how she spent her time on this earth. Yeah, i mean, its also, i think really important that liz garbus made a documentary that will live on as this is the kind of focus these things should have, which is also what michelle wanted to have. Which is not the killer, not this dark, you know, antihero wannabe, but these victims, these survivors, these resilient men and women, that people that were chasing him, the people that had to do survive his sickness, basically. That is the focus of it. It brings the focus back onto life and if that is the legacy and that is what gets remembered, you know, that to me is really what means the most. That definitely is the hardest seth i also want to talk about, in lighter fare, im very excited a new season, season three of ap bio is coming out on peacock. Yes seth i remembered, you know, its surreal to think back, but you guys did get eight out of the ten filmed, which is luckier than most shows, certainly yes seth and i can imagine, i think you wrapped the eighth episode on march 12th, which was the same day we had to cancel our show i remember it was the afternoon of thurday, march 12th, and everyone was checking their twitter and news updates and they were like, wow, they are locking everything down. Im like, are we going to you know and you could feel the pacing become faster and very runandgun, because it felt like, we got to get these in the can. How do we do this . How do we so, and i remember we shot until 9 00 that night. And then at 9 00 they brought us all together and we were all looking at each other, we know whats about to happen and they went, yeah, its all being locked down. Everyone go home. And i remember getting in the car and going to ivans and buying, like as much bottled water, and you know, power bars and stuff that i could but it really felt like, this is the last this is the last hurrah of this world for a little while seth and it will be, i think, surreal as well for people to watch a show that takes place in a high school where, you know, no one is obviously taking any precautions about transmitting diseases. So, hopefully people will enjoy the escapism of simpler times. Where like puberty and things like that were the toughest hurdles for High Schoolers yeah. Seth another show that is even though its about a murder, mapleworth murders, is an incredibly innocent and incredibly sweet show, that stars your cohort at a. P. Bio, paula pell, and yourself and that show is available on quibi, and certainly is fun to watch and im assuming was fun to make. Theres a scene paula pell is such a friggin genius. She its basically if Martin Scorsese directed murder, she wrote, thats kind of the vibe to it. Where its really nice and sunny, and then it gets weirdly violent and sexual for no reason [ laughter ] and youre just oblivious in the middle of it and she calls in a murderers row, all of her friends, tina fey and fred armisen, and theyre all in there and its just john lutz. Theres a scene where she is sucking i cant get through this without laughing. She is explaining the solution to a murder, but it involves all this really, really graphic sexual stuff, and when i was reading the scene, i dont say anything, but i was facing Jack Mcbrayer and all he is doing is just reacting to what shes saying like kind of [ laughter ] frozen smile of terror. And i, i was so terrified that i was going to blow the take because its so hilarious. That show is amazing i hope they get to do more of those, because she is just seth i hope so too yeah. Seth and i cant wait to see more a. P. Bios and its always just a delight to see you. Best of luck yes seth to you, my friend. Well deserved. And ill see you soon. Lesson with adele, so i have to go sorry. [ laughter ] l seth and she went outside, and adele is not here yet, and she is locked out. Exactly, shes locked out i got to go. [ laughter ] seth okay, bye, buddy. See you, bye. Seth a. P. Bio returns with new episodes on peacock september 3rd. And in the meantime, check out a. P. Bio the podcast wherever you get your podcasts. We will be right back with more late night. The only thing that makes tmobiles new offer on iphone better is the people you share it with. So right now switch and get two new lines of unlimited for only 90 and get 2 iphone 11s or 2 iphone 11 pros on us. All on tmobiles most powerful signal that goes farther than ever before. Hurry into tmobile now and get two iphone 11 s or two iphone 11 pros on us. Only at tmobile. Scratch that, baby, im grateful. Got to say its really been a while but now i got back that smile. Smile. Check everything off the list with lower prices and hundreds of deals. Get ready for school at target. Really hold up against 60 of the toughest stains . Absolutely. Seventh generation. Clean clothes, powered by plants. Did you know Liberty Mutual customizes your Car Insurance tada seventh generation. So you only pay for what you need . Given my unique lifestyle, thatd be perfect let me grab a pen and some paper. Know what . Im gonna switch now. Just need my desk. My chair. And my phone. Only pay for what you need. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. Digiorno has 7 delicious crusts. And your family food critics will rave. Rising crust is freshbaked deliciousness. Stuffed crust is literally mouthwatering. Theres a fivestar pizza for everyone in your family to love. Its not delivery, its digiorno. Hi. Whats on your mind . In. Can you help keep these guys protected online . Easy. Connect to the xfi gateway. What about wireless data options for the family . You can customize and save. What about internet speeds that can keep up with my gaming . Lets hook you up with the Fastest Internet from xfinity. And now with our stores reopening, were putting Healthy Practices in place. Come visit a store today. Stop in or book an appointment online at a time that works for you. Now thats simple, easy, awesome. Ask. Shop. Discover at your local xfinity store today. Seth welcome back to late night. Last week, President Trump invoked his emergency economic powers to ban the digital app, tiktok here to talk about it is our new writer, jeff wright. What it do, seth . Seth hey, jeff so what do you think about the president banning tiktok i hate this someone has to do something. Seth oh, wow so i didnt realize youd be that upset of course im upset im a young person imagine if someone took your metamucil, seth. Youd be mad too seth im not that old. Are you on tiktok seth im on twitter. Oh, like the president. Seth im not as old as the president. Oh, good for you. Sound like my grandma. Thats a great attitude to have. Look, like a lot of young people, i spent a lot of time on tiktok its really important to me. And i think this ban is an attack on the youth. Seth oh, interesting why do you think ending tiktok accounts is an attack on the youth . Because, thats something that donald trump has never had before seth a tiktok account . Youth trump has never been young in his life the man was born old look at this picture look at that shirt hes four years old, and he looks like hes headed to a Parent Teacher conference. Seth well, what about the fact that the app can be used by oppressive governments and counter intelligence, to gather information and surveil americans . I dont understand these old words youre using try saying swag at the end of your sentence. Seth what about the fact that the app could be used to spy on americans swag. Oh, thats what you were trying to say . Look, seth, this is america in 2020. We dont have any intelligence were running around maskless, coughing on each other at Outback Steakhouse we dumb as hell. The only information that could be collected from our country is what not to do besides, this isnt about data or intelligence, this is about the president getting roasted. Seth oh, so you think trumps decision to ban is based on the amount of people who make fun of him on tiktok seth, what is the only thing worse than being teased . Seth being teased by people younger than you on an app you dont understand exactly, seth tiktok has been around and owned by china for four years. But now suddenly when Trump Realizes hes being roasted on it, he has a problem with it its clear theres a connection its like how i heard you wore shorts to the office one time, and everyone made fun of your bird legs so bad, no one is allowed to wear shorts to the office anymore seth thats not true so i can wear shorts to the office seth no ones going to the office right now because of covid. But i can wear shorts when we come back . Seth well, i think itll probably be too cold for shorts then what if winter shorts is my thing . Seth look, i dont have bird legs, okay see youre mad that you got teased, and so is trump. Id be mad too, if an app that sounds like a fun way to tell time, filled with people dancing, was actually being used to make fun of me. Old people are crazy sensitive almost as sensitive as they are indecisive seth indecisive . Yes first they tell us go outside more, and get off your screens. Then you guys cancel outside for what seems like forever. So we stay inside and use tiktok, but now thats getting banned at this point, im like, what more do you want from me talk to him, seth use your old words to convince him. Seth i dont think i can convince trump to do anything. What about when you convinced him to run for president seth i you know, i dont think it was me who did that you would think trump would love tiktok, since he has so much in common with it they are both influenced by shady foreign elements, and they both make you scream at your phone. Seth what about the fact that china may be using tiktoks increasing influence on young minds to push communist propaganda i dont understand these old words youre using try saying swag at the end again. Seth all right what about the fact that china may be using tiktok as a means to push propaganda swag. Oh you got to lead with swag, seth and so what if chinas pushing their narratives food ads do it all the time. No matter how many times they show me that cold looking, floppy ass sandwich, when i get hungry, im never thinking, hm, i should go to arbys. Seth sounds like youre really upset about this. Yes tiktok was all i had seth you still have facebook again, i dont understand these old words. Seth jeff wright, everybody. Well be right back with more late night. M i have moderate to severe plaque psoriasis. Now theres skyrizi. 3 out of 4 people achieved 90 clearer skin at 4 months after just 2 doses. Skyrizi may increase your risk of infections and lower your ability to fight them. Before treatment, your doctor should check you for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms, such as fever, sweats, chills, muscle aches, or coughs. Or if you plan to or recently received a vaccine. Nothing is everything. Ask your dermatologist about skyrizi. Ask your dermatologist im a verizon engineer and im part of the Team Building 5g ultra wideband. 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Rush to work, grab a drink, hurry home. [cell phone beeps] stop dont be on your phone. Let someone else take the wheel. Make a little eye contact. Make a plan. Its a busy world out there. Were all in it together. Go safely, california. Lily everyone in the house is online and i cant get enough bandwidth to video chat with my book club. Try 1 gig internet with at t fiber. You get more bandwidth and hbo max included. So, everyone stays entertained. So i can just watch the show instead of reading the book . You know, if you turn on your subtitles. Thats almost reading. Get 1 gig internet with at t fiber for 49. 99a month for a year. No annualcontract. And now get hbo max included. Limited availability in select areas. Call 1. 877. Only. Att you can adjust your comfortst on both sides. Your sleepleep numnumber setting. Ed can it help me fall asleep faster . Yes, by gently warming your feet. But can it help keep me asleep . 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Performing hell on wheels, here are the lemon twigs one, two, three black el dorado ripping through the street so many faces and so man different places to meet i rip on down the strip looking for some kicks i picked you up cause you look like hel and you were o your own trip and we were hell on wheel hell on wheels we were dirty screamin wideeyed dreams we were looking for a place to dream hell on wheels hell on wheel hell on wheels we were dirty screamin wideeyed dreams we were looking for a place to dream hell on wheels i thought of us as angels and i thought of u as devils too i thought of us wit the long long hair oh if only we only knew only now im much older baby no more shine shiny new the kids of yesterday have gone but they left us with their blues they left us runnin for love they left us running for lov running for love they left us runnin running on running for our love we were hell on wheel hell on wheels we were dirty screamin wideeyed dreams we were looking for a place to dream hell on wheels we were hell on wheel hell on wheels we were dirty screamin wideeyed dreams and we were looking for a place to dream hell on wheels we were hell on wheel hell on wheels we were dirty screamin wideeyed dreams looking for a place their album songs for the general public is out this friday we will be right back. Give you my world how can i, when you wont take it from me you can go your own way go your own way your wireless. Your rules. Only with xfinity mobile. Seth were down to our final shows here in the Captains Quarters and if theres anything i hope you remember from this time, it is the sea captain painting behind me. He became a vital part of these shows, due in no small part to the fact that i have been recording them with not a single human being for company. Now, some of you, with cause, did not care for the sea captain. You let me know on social media, which led us to take an informal poll in which i asked viewers to google sea captain, print that page out, write yes or no on it, and then send it to their best guess of where my inlaws live i did not think that anyone would do this, because i forgot that during the pandemic people have some time on their hands. Mail came, you guys, and the arrival of this mail was not necessarily celebrated by my inlaws. In fairness to them, during the time of a virus, youre not dying to get mail from strangers. But you guys, i have to admit that every single envelope that we got really made me laugh. [ laughter ] especially when i would open it and all would be inside would be this laugh even harder when somebody took the time to mail us this. This like got a stamp and everything and people want to get rid of the u. S. Mail. But there was one that was particularly special it came from ontario, canada. And it included a link to their family recording an outro for our show that had a sea shanty