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From rockefeller center, in the heart of new york city, its the tonight show starring jimmy fallon tonight join jimmy and his guests mike tyson, adam devine, musical guest chronixx, and featuring the legendary roots crew, and now heres your host. Jimmy fallon thank you very much, everybody and welcome to the tonight show. Im jimmy fallon today is july 27th and you know what that means 99 days. 99 days 99 days away from the president ial election. Thats right. We are just 99 days away from election and just 100 days away from President Trump declaring the results invalid. Just 99 days, or as one person put so much hacking, so little time trump thinks 99 days and plenty of time to get his campaign in shape. Hes like someone looking in the mirror going i still have time to get ready for swim suit season thats like an entire baseball season plus 96 days. Yeah, 99 days doesnt seem like that much. Then again the last 99 days have felt like 900 years. The clock is ticking on trumps chances to turn around he spent the morning screaming into his mypillow, which has 99 days left, it looks like joe biden is close to choosing i got screwed because no one laughed at that last joke. Maybe if you hear it at home the mypillow guy is his biggest supporter is mypillow. Keep it in there no, no. Oh, good. Its not worth it well w just 99 days left t looks like joe biden is close to choosing a running mate this week and hes personally interviewing all the candidates. He said im going to ask you the same question obama asked me, do you know how to play the quiet game hes asking the hardhitting questions like do you have organize experience organizing pills . And where do you see yourself in five years and the candidates are like, president. While discussing trumps response to the pandemic, pelosi said her new nickname for trump is mr. Make matters worse. For more, im joined by the person who writes the clever nicknames nancy pelosi uses. How did you come up with the nickname, mr. Make matters worse . Well, first i started with trumps agenda, which is man and i thought what is trump doing thats upsetting so many people right now and thats obvious. Its the way he handles matters, right . Well, he makes them worse and thats how the famous nickname was born now everyone calls trump mr. Make matters worse i dont think anyone but pelosi is calling him that no offense but people are saying its not the best nickname ever. Its not my proudest work i came up with a nickname for betsy devos that is devastating. My nickname for her, the secretary of miseducation of the american people. I think youre hitting the same wall there. Nicknames are usually catchy i usually only have to answer to Speaker Pelosi. These names are very funny to an 80yearold woman who is extremely stressed Dwayne Johnsons nickname was the rock, not the big man good at punching and acting ill come clean i know these names arent good, i get it but nancy loves them she told me the key to a good nickname is long and impossible to remember. Being the nickname writer is my dream job. Dont ruin this for me im sorry i didnt mean to upset you maybe you can tell me if you think Speaker Pelosi would like them sure. It seems like you and i would have different tastes but, sure, lets give it a shot this is for steve kilis a member of the house. More like member of the house and the house is a house of cards that is tumbling down. Thats all one nickname loud and clear, jimmy but this next is a perfect burn for mike pence the Vice President dont of the ununited states of ameridont mitch mcconnell, captain of the ss all aboard toot toot. Look, it seems like the other ones pelosi likes kind of, so i wont say tilts its good, but maybe shell like that one now i can go back to helping the democrats fight the Trump Administration the best way we know how, with sass. Kevin chipriano, everybody. And get this, the other day trump said hed be throwing out the first pitch at a yankees game next month. President trump says he wont be throwing out the first pitch august 15th afterall he tweeted hes focusing on coronavirus meetings and the economy and cant be there that day. Although, thanks to his hand ling of the pandemic, he might be able to throw out the last pitch tomorrow i wish trump didnt cancel [ laughter mostly because i wanted to see him slowly walk down the pitchers mound. The dirt is very slippery, very, very slippery and im wearing leather shoes. Everyone knows when you wear leather shoes and slippers, pitchers mounds, its hard to get down off the mound its kind of sad trump cancelled throwing the ball. Don jr. Was like you get used to it well, trump skipping the first pitch isnt the news baseball fans are upset about today already theres trouble. Espn reporting the Miami Marlins home opener tonight has been cancelled eight more players and two coaches have tested positive for coronavirus. In all 14 people in the clubhouse have tested positive 14 players and coaches on one team have already tested positive just days into the season but lets reopen schools thats a tough break for the marlins and Major League Baseball besides that, who saw this coming who knew a sport where they spit and high five would put people at risk. Half the marlins tested positive even worse, the team is replacing those players with dr. Fauci. [ symbol and if dr. Fauci isnt available, they could try to get quest love not funny hey oh, check this out. 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Enroll today hes going to get back into the boxing ring. Mike tyson is here this evening. Adam divine is here. Hes got a new quibi, quibi, and we have great music all the way from jamaica chronixx is on the show. Hey, everyone, this past weekend we lost an absolute legend. Tv host and our good friend Regis Philbin passed away at 88 years old. Regis got his start as an nbc page here at the tonight show when steve allen was the host, but the big break for him was in 1967 when he became famous as the sidekick on the joey bishop show he could do everything. He could sing, he was funny, like really funny. And he was an entertainer. He was always game to do a bit, dress up, he would do anything for a laugh. I loved him, my grandparents loved him, my mom and dad loved him. Between his early career and his time on regis and kathie lee and regis and kelly, he was part of all of our lives. He would tell funny stories about his night out in manhattan the night before and tell them with such humor and class and grace. I loved that he never forgot his irish roots, and as someone who grew up in an irish family, i could relate to all of his stories. When i started to become famous on saturday night live and people would ask, whats it like when people recognize you on the street . And i would reply, i feel like regis and everyone understood that. There was no need for explanation, he was the king of new york i was lucky enough to be on his show as a guest and he was on my show numerous times. Hell be remembered as a genuinely nice person a funny human a good husband, father and grandfather. And he always had that smile when irish eyes are smiling, theyll steal your heart away. Regis, well miss you. So we gave the world another look. And saw a future of differences celebrated. Every voice heard and advocated. Where everyone can show their pride. cause love should never have to hide. Theres a world of possibility that cant exist with you versus me. It will take work, thats indisputable. But oh man it could be beautiful. This world where we are we. cheezit snapd. How does it taste . Its so thin, crispy and cheesy. And i just want to keep eating it. Ive done it and eating it. they love em snapd. So good, we may run out of cheese. Itchy . Scratchy . Family not get charmin ultra strong. It just cleans better, so your family can use less. Hello clean bottom enjoy the go with charmin. Does your deodorant protect you all day . We put dove men care to the test with mike who transforms homes for those in need. I feel comfortable and protected all day long. Dove men care 48h freshness with triple action moisturizer. Who knows where that button is . I dont have silent. Everyone does right up here. It happens to all of us. We buy a new home, and we turn into our parents. What i do is help new homeowners overcome this. What is that, an adjustable spanner . Good choice, steve. Okay, dont forget youre not assisting him. You hired him. If you have nowhere to sit, you have too many. Who else reads books about submarines . My dad. Yeah. Oh, those are progressive cant protect you from becoming your parents, but we can protect your home and auto when you bundle with us. Look at that. An army family who is always at the ready. So when they got a little surprise. Two . They didnt panic. They got a bigger car for their soontobebigger family. After shopping around for insurance, they called usaa who helped find the right coverage for them and even some muchneeded savings. That was the easy part. Usaa insurance is made the way liz and mike need it easy. Welcome back, everybody. Hey, whenever i need a pick me up, i go to my main source of spiritual strength its time for blessed, inspire and now blessed inspired. Our first inspirational quote is sing like no one is listening, dance like nobody is watching, but i cant promise i wont post this on tiktok. Im already starting to feel better how about this morsel . You have the best view theres ever been until tom hanks plays you in a bio pick, then tom hanks is the best you. Heres a treasure. It takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile. So, frown more and use that peloton i got you for christmas, babe heres a little blessing the journey of a thousand miles begins with the single step and the words making my way downtown oh man oh man. Not a big Vanessa Carlton fan . Heres a spot of a spot of clear tea. Dont cry start smiling and everyone will be jealous or cry and smile at the same time its terrifying. How about another touch of inspiration . True beauty is on the inside well, unless youre an old avocado, then youre just brown mush come to think of it youre not so pretty on the outside either. Heres a used birkenstock that has the outline of your foot in it i used to think that both dragons and dinosaurs were real and i like them both a lot then when i got older, i realized dinosaurs were real and dragons were imaginary, so i liked dinosaurs more and when i got older, i started reading fantasy books, so i liked dragons more then the final season of game of thrones game, and i didnt like dragons anymore i thought the jurassic films were a fun romp. Is that a word romp that happens when you stay too much its called semantics association. The last seize often game of thrones ruined dragons for me. Lets crack open this last little geode live, laugh, love. Person, woman, man, camera, tv thats all the time we have for blessed, inspired. Stick around, well be right back with mike tyson [10th gen intel bong] tonight, try pure zzzs all night. Unlike other sleep aids, our extended release melatonin helps you sleep longer. And longer. Zzzquil pure zzzs all night. Fall asleep. 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Lily everyone in the house is online and i cant get enough bandwidth to video chat with my book club. Try 1 gig internet with at t fiber. You get more bandwidth and hbo max included. So, everyone stays entertained. So i can just watch the show instead of reading the book . You know, if you turn on your subtitles. Thats almost reading. Get 1 gig internet with at t fiber for 49. 99a month for a year. No annualcontract. And now get hbo max included. Limited availability in select areas. Call 1. 877. Only. Att my first guest is a boxing legend and the creator of legends only league. Hes making his return to the ring to take on roy jones jr. On september 12th you can catch that on payperview and triller. And on august 9th, you can check out tyson vs. Jaws rumble on the reef as part of discovery channels shark week. Heres mike tyson man it has been a while since the first time i told you i saw you was at my high school in socrates. It was like a golden glove or something. Castore sold you a pair of boxing shoes mike tyson got his boxing shoes from montanas. It was the coolest thing ever and now here you are, mike tyson is back. Iron mike. Yeah, im so happy. Its going to be so awesome. Im so happy to be coming to the ring and facing roy jones. Its going to be awesome and im launching being a prototype of it, im launching my legends only league. Leagues from all over i dont care pool shark, all the exlegends who want to play and still able to play and still beautiful, like myself, they can come with us, call me. Like before i was saying we have metta world peace, one on one and have Wayne Gretsky go up against the guy one on one thats a great idea oh, man, were going to help various charities. Of course, i can still do it, of course this is what i want to do. Really looking forward to it and did you pick roy jones i dont know. Its a whole bunch of guys i got from rob sapp to roy jones. I think hes the greatest fighter of my joaneration and hes the greatest of his generation and no brainer we should clash together. Youve never fought together . We planned on fighting but it didnt happen and this is the opportunity now. I saw the training footage of you on instagram and oh, my gosh, youve got it, man unbelievable i dont know how come it came back i started training im back in shape, 228 ive been boxing i cant believe the season i dont believe in the founlt fountain of youth bu something came over me man, im back. How does it feel training from 54 compared to when you were 24 . Well, its really painful really painful and from this experience right now, ill never call another fighter a bum because anyone who attempts to do this is no bum. Its tough. What do your kids think . They think i should sit my old as down. But what do they know . Neither one of my kids can beat me in a fight. So, what are they talking about . Wait until they see what dad does absolutely. I know youre going to win because i know you youre mike tyson. How long is a round . Three minutes . Three minutes i think in your head, youre going to want to go five rounds. But i think once you get in there and you get tagged once, the hurricane is going to come out, the iron mike is going to come out im going to say fourth round. And thats being nice. Why dont we just do a lottery and find out definitely. Ill fly to you. Absolutely. Its going to be so awesome. Iron mike, where did that come from . Custom auto . Someone started calling me iron mike a friend of mine, carlos santos. He said man, ill buy a tshirt that said iron mike and now everybody call said me iron mike see, i didnt know that and i just saw pictures of jaime fox, who is unbelievable i love that guy. Hes so talented hes playing you in a movie called finding mike. We talked about it last time you were on the show and so now its finally happening. And im looking forward to this its going to be interesting observing myself but jaime said to me i have tons of mikes stories like, he was with you through the good times and the bad times. Jaime might participate in the legends only league as well because im sure there are some comedians that want to kick hiss as and listen, for all athletes, anyone, ping pong players, handball players, all the legends of the pasts who are around for 45 50 years old, come with me. Tell your agents to call me. Get in shape i dont care who you are everybody. We have something for you. Of course theyre still beautiful, as myself and able to do what they do. So, why do they have to not do what they do you can still have a great football team, one on one tennis, ping pong, whatever, handball, whatever basketball, football whatever it is, we got it. Just because you got older, doesnt mean youre not still an athlete . Exactly how many people you know still out run jerry rice no. No one no one i know. Exactly and i bet you he has more fan bases and more youtube followers than the guy who plays his position in the team he used to play for i think its a great idea why does he have to die because they say he cant play no more . Exactly im so excited about this. September 12th and if anyone needs anymore reason be to excited for the fight, take a look at this why do i want to be the baddest man in the planet . Sometimes i wish i could quit having desires to go forward and be somebody because its a lot of work. You got to be willing to get up every morning, 5 00, hit that rope, every day. Hit that gym because there are other man is going to do anything he got to do necessary to win nobody ever went from dreaming and becoming heavyweight champion just like david and goliath, if he hits you, he can take your head off and im the little david who only has god on my side thats what im talking about. Would you like to stick around because i want to talk to you about sharks . Lets do it more with mike tyson when we come back, everybody neighbor whatcha working on. burke just an app. Its called signal from farmers, and it could save you up to fifteen percent on your auto insurance. Simply sign up, drive and save. We are farmers. Bumpadum, bumbumbumbum when better chickens are hatched, we will hatch them. Its why all of the tyson chicken that bears his name is raised with no antibiotics ever. Every nugget, strip and drumstick. Keep it real. Keep it tyson. Its about to get bester baby menutaur make it a double, yeah nice mane try my 5. 99 southwest cheddar cheeseburger combo and make it a double for a buck more. Order now with no contact delivery. Want restand schools . Pen . Want the economy to get back on track . Youre not alone. And you can help make it happen. Stay 6 feet apart. Wash your hands. Wear a mask every time you leave your home. Choose to join the fight against covid19. Do your part. Slow the spread. Hi. Whats on your mind . In. Can you help keep these guys protected online . Easy. Connect to the xfi gateway. What about wireless data options for the family . You can customize and save. What about internet speeds that can keep up with my gaming . Lets hook you up with the Fastest Internet from xfinity. And now with our stores reopening, were putting Healthy Practices in place. Come visit a store today. Stop in or book an appointment online at a time that works for you. Now thats simple, easy, awesome. Ask. Shop. Discover at your local xfinity store today. Get a load of my southwest cheddar cheeseburger. Let menutaur make it a doubleeee, yeah its beautiful say what . I said its bea. Try my 5. 99 southwest cheddar cheeseburger combo and make it a double for a buck more. Order now with no contact delivery. Were back with iron mike tyson. Mike, you look fantastic, buddy. You are too fantastic, man. Cant wait for you to see me in the ring and do my thing i cant believe you did this thing on shark week. Listen. My wife talked me into doing this said, hey, will smith did it and he didnt complain. Why are you going to complain . And i said will smith is a different kind of guy. Hes adventures. Im not. She convinced me to go on this trip so, im in the bahamas and she accompanied me in the bahamas and man, first i was in the cage with the shark and now its kind of claustrophobic. It wasnt fun and exciting and then i did the free dive and i was hanging out with some sharks no, no, no. People from brooklyn should not do that. Hey, listen, i understand but my wife felt it was a way for me to overcome my fear and i did. She was right. It must have been amazing you must be happy you did it now that its over im very satisfied that i did it and i survived. The most exciting thing is i looked up and man, it was like 50 feet up and i said how can i make it up mike tyson week i dont know if im not a water guy no. And i was happy to do it i over came so many fears, unbelievable tyson verses jaws a rumble in the reef since youre facing up against jaws and roy jones jr. , i want to get your take and see if you can beat a few other legends you ready . Im ready for anybody mike tyson verses rocky balboa i will kick rockys but come on yeah, dude. Hes an underdog, he came from nowhere no, dude, i would slaughter, slaughter, slaughter i win, i win, i win. Stick with rocky movies, how about ivan drago from rocky 4 . Oh, man, too slow, too many muscles. Yeah, yeah. How about this one this one could happen . Mike tyson verses Conor Mcgregor wow look at that yeah. That dudes nuts yeah, but im going to kick his as anyway. [ laughter but he doesnt play by the rules. Hes all mma and stuff then we dont play with boxing rules mike tyson verses the karate kid . Whoa. Wax off, wax on. This is pretty complicated im going to surrender to him on this one but then again its me and roy jones, an eightround exhibition and its going to be magnificent and im going to look beautiful and fourth park and this is going to be awesome. Let me say it one more time. This is the Health Sports center park this is where its at. September 12th. Best of luck, my friend. And listen, i love you and listen, man, try to come if not, go to payperview on triller, innovation. Were kicking as, man. Dont forget, eons innovations, forgive me were kicking as i love you guys. Tyson verses jaws rumble on the reef august 12th on payperview and triller well be right back. Adam divine, everybody l these years its the ones that got away that haunt me the most. [ squawks ] cause youre not like everybody else. Thats why Liberty Mutual customizes your car insurance, so you only pay for what you need. What . Oh, i said. Uh, this is my floor. Nooo only pay for what you need. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. 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This world where we are we. our next guest is a talented actor and comedian with a brand new show called bad ideas with adam divine, now on quibi. Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you. Im so happy youre on my show thank you so much because i get to congratulate you, kind of, over zoom. Congratulations on being engaged to be married. Oh, thanks, jimmy did the quarantine put a stop the planning at all . Well, neither of us are like huge planners. So, we kind of didnt start planning until the quarantine hit and were like we should probably get on this and realized that everything is pushed like a solid year and a half so, i didnt wanted to be involved with any of the planning i wrote a post to chloe saying, look, we got engaged and in the post i wrote have fun planning the wedding. Ill see you at the cake testing and everyone is like thats cute im like, thats real. I plan on not being involved im just here. Put on the tux i do and now theres no getting around it because shell be like what do you think of these flowers and i cant be like im busy and shes like youre not buddy, youre watching season sirks of the sopranos. Which is good. Which is great, by the way. I want to get into bad ideas has your confidence increased because of your show on quibi, bad ideas. Now that youre like a dare devil now . Yeah. Its a weird thing definitely kind of stuff that in my normal regular life i would never do we went up the amazon and swam with piranas and things i normally wouldnt do theres definitely an element of danger in the show that, in hindsight, i was like maybe if we do a season two, im a little more cautious. Ive never had a fried egg before that would be cool, right . Thats a bad idea. Its a bad idea this is not going to be good at all if i eat two of these mcmuffins. Im a wild man. Kill me now. Thats a different show yeah, how many fruit i can eat out of this fruit tray oh, man, hes nuts. No spoilers. This is wild, and hes dipping it in yogurt this guys insane. Can i show this on tv too much dairy. Did you get hurt . Yeah, so, i did one with Blake Anderson from workaholics. And we did a Demolition Derby. That was nuts, jimmy they literally taught us how to drive stick before we did the Demolition Derby we did one with a double decker on two cars welded on top of each other and blake was in charge of the gas and brakes and i was in charge of the steering and we were doing great. Were in first place and really, for whatever reason this just worked for the two of us, but you couldnt hear, so were screaming. Im like brake, brake and hes like gas and we took a corner too quickly. Doesnt even rhyme with brake. And we flipped over and i was at the top so, came and a full on, surplap, surplap. I saw stars, i cracked a rib my neck was all messed up. And from there, they pulled us out and theyre like are you good and im like i think so. And theyre like can you do that and im like uh. And theyre like you dont have a concussion next race. Wow and thats just one of the episodes rebel wilson and i did an action stunt episode. Reunited. And it feels so good. We talk about how were known as comedy people but we want to be cool action heroes you know all comedians wanted to be james bond we all want to be something were obviously not. And im like im a cool action hero and shes the same way. So, we were like we should do something we get in a ton of cool stunts. So, were in wild western theme place. We get in a big bar fight and she shoots me and i run up the stairs and im looking for a way to escape and she comes outsid and shoots me from the street and i fall like four stories into some cardboard boxes and i told the stunt guys this idea and theyre like cool, so when you get up there, well do a texas switch and youll flip with a real stunt guy and hell fall on boxes. Im like, no, thats the whole point of the show is im going to fall on the boxes and theyre like thats a really bad idea and im like exactly. Thats the name of the show back to quibi now this is from the Demolition Derby episode. Oh, cool. Slow down when we get into the turns because this thing can tip. All gas, no brake what . All gas no brake. No. Now were cooking, baby lets make a run for the jewels hey, adam you good . I feel like i got hit in the head with a baseball bat we didnt die. We had it too my thanks to adam divine. Check out bad ideas with adam divine on quibi. Check out bad ideas with adam divine on quibi. Chronixx performs for us next. Check out bad ideas with adam when you think of a bank, you think of people in a place. But when you have the chase mobile app, your bank can be virtually any place. So, when you get a check. You can deposit it from here. And you can see your transactions and check your balance from here. You can save for an emergency from here. 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Yeah yeah yeah roll out we coo as the breez wallet look like a science book swear a schoo mi ago teach rev the truck up t the mountain top and as soon as mi reach go get di skun kick the shoes off mi feet then me bless the cup 32 psalms mi rea give thanks fo di love mi receive mi work every day inna the stree and everyday end with nights like these when a holida wi touch pan di beac white tshir and a cut off jeans and we nu need no sneakers sand grains massage mi feet blessing a flow like river girl drop aslee she steam the indica wake her an she the sun burning up til it re welcome to kingsto every day is a summer every night fee like a frida rev da bike til de swear is a hummer high grade make wi eye re still wi nah go re yiy fi nobody tings every night a frida oh yeah oh yea general a general an when wi touch di road mi an mi empres an mi bredda dem nuh roll wid nuh strange herbs pretty like a emerald no one poun a several in the chalice puff it up mek babylon see the vapour tell yuh dem nuh read feel di energy wi bringing every style weh dem a fall yes a we a di maker spending like a runne think a bolt whe wi come ya member everyday a summer when yuh deh a jamaic hold on nuh baby this place kinda crazy everybody a dance catch the energy babylon can stop the music rastafari kee it groovin the whole world a pree fi touch down in the west indie the sun burnin up til it re welcome to kingston every day every night feel like a frida rev da bike til dem swear is a hummer high grade a make wi eye red still wi nah go re ya fi nobody tings every night a frida oh yeah oh yea mi work every da inna the street everyday end with nights like thes when a holiday we touch pan da beach a white tshirt and a cut off jean and we nuh need no sneaker di warm sand grains a massage me feet mi locs long like jesus locs when mi steam the sativa u dancehall la la la la dancehal la la la l la la la la dancehall la la la l dancehal la la la la dancehall la la la l dancehal la la la la sun burning u til it red welcome to kingsto every day is a summer every night fee like a frida rev the bike til dem swear is a hummer high grade a make wi eye red still wi nah g red yiy fi nobody tings every night a frida oh yea oh yeah oh yea sun burning up til it re welcome to kingsto every day is a summe every night feel like a friday rev da bike til de swear is a humme high grade a make wi eye re still wi nah go re yiy fi nobody ting every night a friday oh yeah yea sun burning up till it red welcome to kingston everyday every night feel like a friday rev da bike til dem swea high grade a mak wi eye red sill wi nah g red yeah jimmy thank you all for watching stay safe out there. Wash you hands dont touch your face. Well see you tomorrow good night, everybody. Announcer tonight on late night with seth meyers. Senator kamala harris. Head coach of the seattle seahawks, pete carroll an all new closer look. Featuring the 8g band with fred armisen and now seth meyers. Seth welcome to late night everyone i hope you all had a good weekend, and i really hope that was the weekend. There is just no way to know lets get to the news. President trump announced yesterday he will not be able to throw out the ceremonial first pitch at a new york yankees game next month because of his,

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