Guests Robert Downey jr aidy bryant, musical guest Little Big Town, and featuring the legendary roots crew questlove 1188 steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy oh, welcome everybody. Thank you so much. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show. Youre here. Thank you. [ cheers and applause it seems like there is so much is going on right now. Today the house sent the impeachment articles to the senate a cheating scandal in Major League Baseball cost the Boston Red Sox manager his job. [ cheers ] Ken Jennings Ken jennings won the jeopardy greatest of all time tournament [ cheers and applause and an entire town in michigan smells like weed, because so many residents are growing it. [ laughter and cheers theres a lot to go over so lets just jump in and cover it all at once it is time for newsmash. [ cheers and applause jimmy first up, impeachment. Today the house voted to send the impeachment articles over to the senate. Theres no doubt that President Trump is in trouble. He put himself in serious jeopardy [ laughter ] the tournament was so fun to watch. Ken jennings made it looked easy up there. It is almost like he was cheating [ laughter ] red sox manager alex cora organized a scheme to steal signs from catchers. Now hes out of a job. To cheer himself up he might have to take a little trip to weed town, usa [ laughter ] the whole town of bessemer, michigan smells like weed because so many residents like to grow it these people smoke so much weed, you bet you could never see them on jeopardy. [ laughter ] it was a historic once in a generation event that we all got to watch on tv just like the impeachment. [ laughter ] the trial starts soon. And there is new evidence that trumps associates threatened people to get dirt on biden. Democrats are saying thats not okay and totally stinks. [ laughter ] this town is changing michigan from great lakes state to the dank stank state [ laughter ] growing that much weed is a bold move. It takes balls [ laughter ] the red sox could see them coming from a mile away since they knew the signs. But they got caught. They should never wagered it all. [ laughter ] and thats what ken jennings did and it paid off big time his score was so high, in fact, he might as well live in bessemer, michigan [ laughter ] so in conclusion, good luck, good luck. What is good luck . [ laughter ] what is wait, what [ cheers and applause steve acting jimmy you guys i am excited about this Robert Downey jr. Is my guest tonight steve come on [ cheers and applause jimmy he stars in the new movie dolittle. Yep, dolittle, which pretty much sums up last nights democratic debate. [ light laughter ] thats right, last night was the seventh democratic debate. And a lot of people are saying that it was pretty dull. Its odd, because i really thought six white people standing behind podiums on stage for two hours was going to be a rager. [ laughter ] but the main reason people watched was to see Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders go at it after bernie reportedly told her a a woman couldnt win the presidency well, at the end of the debate it seemed like there was still some tension there check out what happened when bernie went to shake warrens hand the democratic debate in des moines, iowa this was the last time americans will hear the Democratic Candidates all on a a stage together 20 days, six candidates on stage jimmy yeah, wow. Laser focus in policy, iran jimmy can we healthcare. Jimmy can we see them again . [ light laughter ] bernie looks like a delta gate agent who caught someone in zone two trying to board in zone one [ laughter ] there are rules there are rules, maam i am going to ask you. [ light laughter ] that exchange looked pretty intense. Luckily, we were able to get the enhanced audio steve oh jimmy of what they were saying it seems like people may be blowing this out of proportion check it out [ all whispering ] hey bernie, i was wondering if youve heard Justin Biebers new song yummy . What . It goes youve got that yummy, yummy no, listen, the only bieber song i listen to is sorry. Yummy is better your opinion, not mine. Agree to disagree. Hey, when you are talking about the 1 , are you talking about me [ bleep ] off [ laughter ] [ applause ] steve wow. [ cheers and applause jimmy we got that audio. My goodness. Steve wow. Jimmy one of the biggest moments from last nights debate was Amy Klobuchar talking about her election record check it out my republican opponents have gotten out of politics for good and i think i think that sounds pretty good [ laughter ] jimmy pretty good [ laughter ] pretty good. It was trending on twitter last night. Pretty good. But i noticed you can actually use pretty good to describe a lot of things. Like, for example, if you get an alert that your grubhub order is arriving early thats pretty good [ laughter ] jimmy if you send the wrong text, but switch your phone to Airplane Mode just in time, thats pretty good [ laughter ] jimmy or finally, if you happen to stop by weed town, usa. Thats pretty good [ laughter ] jimmy its works in a bunch of ways. [ cheers and applause and now that the Iowa Caucuses are just weeks away, voters in the state are being bombarded with campaign ads. The battle for airwaves have gotten so intense that Mike Bloomberg is now attacking the my pillow guy. Steve wow. [ laughter ] jimmy we knew that joke was not going to work about 20 minutes ago but were still steve tried it anyway. You know [ laughter ] jimmy we still wanted to try it steve yeah jimmy and see if it worked and it didnt. Steve it did not [ laughter ] jimmy i just like saying my pillow guy steve come on. Who doesnt . [ laughter ] jimmy even though he wasnt at the debate, Mike Bloombergs campaign tried gaining some attention by tweeting out a bunch of weird, absurd facts that had nothing to do with the election did anyone see this . They even posted a photo of bloombergs face on a meatball check this out [ laughter ] [ light laughter ] it says, spot the meatball that looks like mike. So if youre keeping track, bloombergs appeared in zero debates but on one meatball. [ laughter ] well, as i mentioned, today the house finally voted to send the articles of impeachment to the senate i dont know, maybe its just me but the impeachment sort of feels like greys anatomy. Every time i see it, my first thought is, is that still on tv . [ laughter ] thats right, pelosi appointed seven impeachment managers who will prosecute the case against trump. I dont know if that was a good idea i mean, when you pick seven, arent you begging trump to give them dwarf nicknames from snow white . [ laughter ] theres congressman dopey, sleepy, grumpy. [ laughter ] can we see a photo of pelosi and the seven managers i know it doesnt seem like much, but compared to last nights debate that looks like the cast of dolemite. [ laughter ] and maybe pelosi was smart to delay sending over the articles, because there is new evidence in the case against trump. It turns out that one of Rudy Giulianis associates, lev parnas, actually wrote a a note that said, get zelensky to announce that the biden case will be investigated. Trump was furious. He was like, you stayed at the ritz instead of one of my hotels . [ laughter ] but trumps keeping busy last night he held a rally in wisconsin where he ranted about dishwashers. He said people have to run them ten times to get things clean. First of all, since when does trump use a dishwasher [ laughter ] everything he eats comes in a wrapper. [ light laughter ] second, trump said the same exact thing about toilets. He said people are flushing toilets ten times to get them to work. I think i know whats going on here i think trump his washing dishes in the toilet and hes going to the bathroom in the dishwasher. [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] during an even today, trump welcomed several Business Leaders to the white house, including ford executive nancy joy falotico lets see how that went. Nancy falotoco, of ford [ laughter ] nancy, where are you jimmy please welcome nancy from ford versus ferrari. [ laughter ] jimmy some tv news jeopardys greatest of all time tournament is over and in the end, ken jennings won three games. James holzhauer won one. And brad rutter didnt win any yep, rutter is one of jeopardys all time greats and now everyone looks at him like, idiot. [ laughter ] you guys, a lot of people follow the news by just checking out whats trending on the twitter. But sometimes seeing just a hashtags doesnt tell the whole story. So to quickly catch you up on the week, lets look at why some of these things were trending first up, theres the hashtag, incoherentdisaster. You may think its trending because of trump ranting about toilets at his rally but incoherentdisaster is actually trending because its the best review of cats. [ laughter ] next up is whitenoise you may think its trending because amazon has a deal on white noise machines but whitenoise is actually trending because its how most people describe last nights democratic debate. [ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] up next is the word goat. It could be trending because ken jennings was named jeopardys greatest of all time. But goat is actually trending because its the main ingredient in arbys meat supreme stacked sandwich [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] thats not a real sandwich steve thats not real. Jimmy i made it up steve joke jimmy next up, theres trex. It should be trending because the band trex is getting inducted into the rock and roll hall of fame but trex is actually trending because Bernie Sanders talked about his first pet. [ laughter ] and finally there is the hashtag highclass you may think its trending cause the queens supportive statement about prince harry but the hashtag highclass is actually trending because of this moment on the bachelor. [ laughter ] jimmy there you go we have a great show give it up for the roots, everybody. [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy we got a fun show tonight. Robert downey jr. Is here steve come on [ cheers and applause jimmy aidy bryant is here steve what [ cheers and applause jimmy and weve got great, great, great music from Little Big Town [ cheers and applause i love those guys. Theyre fantastic. Guys, you know how they say a picture is worth a thousand words . Well, it is also worth one meme ill show you what im talking about. It is time for this week in memes. [ cheers and applause this week in meme this week in memes yeah jimmy first up is a photo of joe biden and Bernie Sanders from last nights debate this meme is called, when you try to disguise yourself with a moustache to go back for a a second costco free sample. [ cheers and applause id like to try that. What would that taste like . Next is a photo of nancy pelosi her meme says, when you give your friend your phone to see a photo and they start scrolling through all of them. Its like [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause give it back. Next is a photo of Vladimir Putin his meme is called, when bae wont hang up first. [ laughter ] [ applause ] next is a photo of a seal. [ audience aws ] this meme is called, when theres only one other person at the nude beach. [ laughter and applause steve hi hey. Jimmy next is a photo of Queen Elizabeth and prince charles. This meme is called, when you realize you should have ordered your starbucks venti frap on the app instead of waiting in line. [ laughter and applause next is a photo of joe biden his meme is called, when grandpa asks you how to print emails from his phone. [ laughter and applause next is a photo of boris johnson. His meme says, when youre checking your hair in the reflection of ya shot glass. [ laughter ] and finally, take a look at this photo of angela merkel. Here meme says, when the office party has a mashed potatoes bar. There you have it. [ cheers and applause thats this week in memes. Well be right back with Robert Downey jr. [ cheers and applause im your mother in law. And i like to question your every move. Like this left turn. Its the next one. You always drive this slow . How did you make someone i love . That must be why youre always so late. I do not speed. And thats saving me cash with drivewise. My son, he did say that you were the safe option. And thats the nicest thing you ever said to me. So get allstate. Stop bossing. Where good drivers save 40 for avoiding mayhem, like me. This is my sons favorite color, you should try it. [mayhem] you always drive like an old lady . [tina] youre an old lady. For powerful relief from cold and flu symptoms without a prescription, try theraflu multisymptom. Theraflu dissolves in seconds, so its ready to work before your first sip, and absorbs quickly to target and attack 8 cold and flu symptoms fast. Try theraflu. I wrote this a long time ago. I dont know how old i was. I hope someday i will be on a real football team. Im katie sowers, offensive assistant coach for the San Francisco 49ers. Im not just here to be the token female, im here to help us win. The surface pro helps me get whats in my head and get it out on to the field. I would want to tell this little girl to keep pushing herself, your dreams coming. Wean air force veteran made of doing whats right,. Not whats easy. So when a hailstorm hit, usaa reached out before he could even inspect the damage. Thats how you do it right. Usaa insurance is made just the way martins family needs it with hasslefree claims, he got paid before his neighbor even got started. Because doing right by our members, thats whats right. Usaa. What youre made of, were made for. Usaa beyond the routine checkups. Beyond the notsoroutine cases. Comcast business is helping doctors provide care in whole new ways. All working with a new generation of technologies powered by our gigspeed network. Because beyond technology. There is human ingenuity. Every day, comcast business is helping businesses go beyond the expected. To do the extraordinary. Take your business beyond. [ cheers and applause jimmy our first guest is one of the biggest movie stars on the planet. For the past decade, youve known him as ironman. His latest film dolittle hits theaters this friday ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Robert Downey jr [ cheers and applause jimmy welcome back [ cheers and applause welcome back wow thats it. Jimmy welcome, welcome, welcome back thank you so much. Its about time, jimmy. Jimmy i love it. Im so happy youre here thanks. Jimmy we have something in common were both really good looking no, im just kidding [ laughter ] and aidy bryant actually, our other guest on the show tonight, weve all got our career started on saturday night live. Three snl alums my gosh. Jimmy yeah i was thinking about it. I go, thats crazy, because you were 20yearsold on i was 20. Jimmy you did one season of snl. Yes arguably the worst season in its history. [ laughter ] they also said i was the worst cast member but come on, theres a lot of competition for that [ laughter and applause jimmy but wait, wait, i remember that season because that was like you was it Anthony Michael hall. Anthony michael hall. Jimmy yeah it was damon wayans was on it. Jimmy thats right Randy Quaid Jimmy yes. Yeah. Jon lovitz jimmy oh, my gosh. There it is jimmy did you were you by yourself in your office, or did you have a roommate . Anthony michael hall and i had the old offices of belushi and aykroyd. We asked for a bunkbeds with nfl sheets jimmy did you . [ laughter ] yeah, we thought, like, just give them a long ride or like you have a bunch of demands. Theyre like, yeah, lets give them that. Now write some funny stuff. [ laughter ] jimmy yeah do anything funny. Yeah did you write anything that ever got on or i the only thing i wrote that made it almost close to air was this ridiculous sketch called, suitcase boy where i came out with a suitcase zipped up around my neck and said a a bunch of nonsequiturs and it was so not funny. [ laughter ] except to me and my weirdo friends. And i was literally sweating mortar shells. Dont. Jimmy i have a picture dont jimmy i have a photo of it [ audience ohs ] you are not going to believe this [ cheers and applause suitcase boys. [ cheers and applause [ laughter ] that looks more a little bit more like a laundry receptacle [ laughter ] but i mean, i say quid pro quo you must have had you must have had a bunko sketch. Come on. Jimmy are you kidding me everything i do is perfect [ laughter ] i was on for six seasons, so i had so many bad ones just like give me a stand out trauma. Jimmy god, theres so many me and horatio would get together and just like, dude, this just went nowhere. The worst one i think was the thing called i had to find it today, because i was thinking about it. Oh, gosh, its so embarrassing i need it jimmy it was called really you did suitcase boy. We did plate boy and cup boy. [ light laughter ] dude, its you win [ laughter ] jimmy for what alec baldwin was the host. Tell me you have it we need something. Jimmy i got it yeah, i got we might have a clip of it all right jimmy but alec baldwin was the host and hes always been great to me and he was always like, try new things and always do this. So horatio could, like, move these cups we got these cups once and it was a rehearsal and he was, like, shaking them back forth and all of the cups would just kind of fly up into the air like a tornado okay. Jimmy it was very odd. And i so went, lets write a sketch this is really funny. And anyways, this debut, it never aired of plate boy first play. Jimmy and cup boy. [ laughter ] lets see maybe over maybe its aged well gentlemen wants a a what . He wants a plate. [ laughter ] come on, plate boy come on. [ laughter ] hang in there. [ babbling ] come on. [ babbling ] i get a cup and they put in a coke [ light laughter ] okay, here i go. Oh, boy. Oh, boy [ laughter ] oh, boy oh, boy. Jimmy do you hear it like, not even [ cheers and applause im sweating were bringing it back. Jimmy really awful wow jimmy its just a flop sweat is coming back okay. Jimmy it was awful so it was like a centrifuge issue or something jimmy i mean, looking back you laugh at it. I go, oh, thats thats powerful jimmy its fun, right . Yeah. Jimmy cause you go like, i love those and look at us here now jimmy look at us here now. Oh, boy jimmy come on. Yeah, right. We are doing something right. Jimmy come on. [ cheers and applause first alum you are the first alum saturday night live alum to be nominated for an oscar for a lead role. Lead actor really . Jimmy thats right yeah wow jimmy thats a good. Thats some good trivia. [ cheers and applause we love everyone at saturday night live loves name dropping you. Like, oh, you know Robert Downey jr. Was a cast member, too. Really . Jimmy yeah, we still look at your headshot on the wall oh, god, maybe ill drop back by one day. [ light laughter ] jimmy yeah, youd crush it, come on. Okay. Jimmy but last time you were here, it was before avengers became the biggest movie in the history of film yeah. Jimmy congratulations on that that is [ cheers and applause everyone says, do you miss it . Of course you miss all the fun moments. Well, i mean, when i was when i started, i was in my early 40s. Now im in my mid50s. I always think its better remember by the time that superman, the tv show was over, the guy playing him, youre like, dude, you are old. [ laughter ] you really like even girdles not working anymore [ light laughter ] so i always think its better to fire yourself before you get fired. [ laughter ] jimmy thats a smart move, yeah but youre youre not stopping i mean, you just started is it team downey what is it yeah, oh, our Production Company. Jimmy yes. With my mrs yes. Jimmy so you and susan, who is awesome by the way, you started a Production Company called team downey right jimmy and you are just crushing it. The thing on youtube that you have a show. Oh, the age of a. I. Jimmy the age of a. I. You have its eight episodes yep jimmy its all about new technology and how crazy is this world, like yeah, and it was a way for me to just get an education on how, you know, big data and robotics and just its incredible what were on the verge of and i played the guy who knows all this stuff, but i really dont know what im talking about. [ light laughter ] so i thought that it would be smart and fun. And it turned out, you know, its been wellreceived and all that my wife has nothing but good ideas. Jimmy yeah me too starting with hooking up with me. Jimmy yeah [ laughter ] yeah, yeah you had to you had to you had to [ cheers and applause and now youre dolittle. Dr. Dolittle youre talking to animals. I am talking directly to animals. Jimmy yes. [ light laughter ] this is this movie is so fun. And the thing was, my kids i have a five and an almost eightyearold and they havent been able to see any of these marvel movies, because act three is always kind of crazy. Jimmy yeah and so this was the first one that my kids came to the premier of and everyone whos going to see the movie and going with their kids is absolutely loving it so im yeah, im psyched. Jimmy what a great cast of voices for these animals astonishing jimmy emma thompson. Rami malek. Jimmy rami Malek John Cena jimmy john cena. Tom Holland Jimmy octavia spencer. My own buddy [ cheers and applause octavia spencer. Jimmy dude it goes on and on antonio banderas, michael sheen. It is its like the cast of benhur. [ laughter ] jimmy its like the avengers cast of voiceover but its really fun. Do you sing in the movie no. [ light laughter ] jimmy because you have a a good voice i know this. You have a good voice jimmy i do not i have no you actually have a good voice ive seen you. Yeah, maybe youre right. [ laughter ] jimmy no, im sorry, im going to keep arguing with you but, no, i just saw you at some event. Oh, sting and trudies rainforest fund. Jimmy yeah you want to talk about a lineup i literally just opened the show and then springsteen and eurythmics reunited. And it was John Mellencamp it was a whos who of folks. Jimmy wow, that was fun. I opened it you know, i was thinking of you, because it was Robert Palmers addicted to love. Im dating myself. Anybody remember that song jimmy of course. Oh, boy, its a big one [ cheers and applause and i thought, fallon would nail this. Youre a ringer for the guy. Jimmy yeah hes all sexy, the white shirt, black tie [ light laughter ] jimmy come on. Give me a little. Jimmy yeah come on, you can do it. Jimmy i can do it. Can we do might as well face it youre addicted to lov might as well face i youre addicted to love might as well face it youre addicted to lov might as well face i youre addicted to love right there, thats all we do. [ cheers and applause we could have done that we could have done that i would have been there im there for you always next time, buddy. Im not im not going on stage to do fivestar karaoke without you. Jimmy thank you, my friend i want to show everyone a clip of the movie dolittle. Heres Robert Downey jr. Take a look. Theres time for me to slip into something less comfortable. Hello i bought a front row seat to crazy town once humphreys been secured, you pull me out on yoshis signal me . I cant handle that type of pressure, doc. Im a cheer quietly from the sidelines kind of gorilla. Dont worry, cheech youll rise to the occasion. You are stronger than you know now remember, courage is not the absence of fear wait you got cutoff. I cant hear you i need the second part no time, cheech, lets go [ cheers and applause jimmy Robert Downey jr. , everybody. Dolittle is in theaters friday Robert Downey jr. And i are doing something fun after the break. Come back. Stick around [ cheers and applause people take Museum Quality photos of things every day. Like grapefruits. We invented the everpopular feet on the beach genre. And that dont forget your parking spot genre. We share photos of friends and food and friends as food. And because were so good at taking photos were also really good at doing taxes. People can be good at anything. Yes, even taxes. Intuit turbotax. Yes, even taxes. burke weve seen almost everything, so we know how to cover almost anything. Even a gold medal grizzly. sports announcer what an unlikely field in this final heat. Hang on. Youre about to see history in the making. burke not exactly a skinny dipper, but we covered it. At farmers, we know a thing or two because weve seen a thing or two. We are farmers. Bumpadum, bumbumbumbum vo visit farmersdotcom and get a quote today. Where these sunsoaked litea leavesactory. Are picked at the peak of freshness. For a naturally smooth taste. And drinking lipton every day can help support a Healthy Heart do you love reeses pieces . Well have we got a deal for you. Were making reeses with pieces. Sorta like a buy one get one free inside the thing you just got. Not sorry. Reeses. On iphone 11 that will have youh seeing double. Right now, switch to tmobile and get 2 lines of unlimited for only 90 and 2 iphone 11s on us. All on tmobiles newest, most powerful signal that goes farther than ever before. Get twice the deal, 2 lines of unlimited for 90 and 2 iphone 11s on us. Only at tmobile. Iced chai. Ry. Pad thai. Baked pie. Pork chop. Soda pop. Scallop. Kebobs. Soursop. Hot pot. Dumpling. Chicken wing. Peking. Onion ring. We are americas kitchen. Doordash. Every flavor welcome. You know, the happiest place on earth, but. Have you flown the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy . Or channeled your inner jedi . You gotta love that. Have you raced through radiator springs . Or struck a power pose with them . Now is the perfect time to feel like this. And this. And definitely that. Kids enjoy the magic for just 67 per child per day, with a 3day 1park per day ticket. [ cheers and applause p jimmy welcome back everybody. I am here with Robert Downey jr. [ cheers and applause now robert and i have a lot of history together not a lot of people know this but back in the early 90s, we both starred a commercial for an allergy medicine called zynerma. Oh, my thats totally right. Jimmy we do you remember that it was fun yeah, that really eccentric director jimmy oh, dont even the director he came out of french cinema, right . Jimmy he did well yeah his he had this thing that he wanted us to have our line readings be really fresh right jimmy right, so he didnt want to see our lines before the bit. Thats right. Jimmy so every time went to the commercial, were reading the lines for the first time yeah. Jimmy right there on set well, i found one of our old commercials. No. Jimmy yes. Oh, it is about time. Jimmy so here for the first time in decades is me and Robert Downey jr. s ad for zynerma. Zynerma [ cheers and applause announcer if you suffer from seasonal allergies, then relief is finally here with once daily zynerma ask your doctor or pharmacist if zynerma is right for you. Before zynerma, my allergies would keep me in bed all day long but not anymore. Now the only thing keeping me in my bed is my fear of tall men. [ laughter and applause side effects of zynerma may include thought blisters, the mumps, hepatitis k, gooberlacosis, tripolar depression, and slacks, premature fatherhoood, stump lung crispix and hat failure [ cheers and applause jimmy best of all, theyre shaped like flintstone characters [ laughter ] not the pills, my nipples. [ laughter and applause zynerma shouldnt replace your asthma inhaler. And it cant replace her [ audience aws ] [ laughter ] sorry big guy, but shes not coming back. The sooner you accept that, the better off were all going to be [ laughter ] she actually wrote you a long letter explaining everything but i accidentally dropped it in the toilet. My bad [ cheers and applause jimmy all right, now me and you together [ applause ] okay. Jimmy ready . Zynerma let me live again, because i was once declared legally dead for 15 hours. [ laughter ] if your erection lasts more than four hours, that has nothing to do with zynerma [ laughter ] but congratulations. [ cheers and applause jimmy theres more [ light laughter ] all right. One time i got a lego man stuck in my no [ laughter ] one time i got a lego man stuck in my nose i blew and blew and blew but he wouldnt come out hes still up there to this day. Sometimes when im laying in bed at night i think about him how old he is. If he ever got married [ laughter ] if hes happy. Then the ambient kicks in, and i fall asleep naked in the front yard [ laughter ] whoa, i just realized something, zynerma rimes with potato wait, no, sorry. Tomato rhymes with potato. Damn it, i just embarrassed myself again i guess my dry cleaner was right. Im a worthless sack of crap [ laughter ] [ laughter ] jimmy hey, chad. Hey, chad. What are you up to, man . I am sorry bro. [ laughter ] jimmy do you know you can make do you know you can make your own homemade tylenol all you need is skittles and vodka. [ laughter ] ask your doctor about zynerma today. Then ask your doctor for their number doctors are good people to date, because theyve already seen you naked and most of them make a [ bleep ] load of money. [ laughter ] jimmy i asked my doctor if zynerma was right for me but he said, ive never heard of zynerma what is it . So i said, its a pill dumbdumb. Just write the prescription. Then he said, thats not how prescriptions work. So i said, pwease. And he said, no. So i said, pwetty, pwetty pwease. And he said, no, again and called the police. [ laughter ] so now i go to the veterinarian [ laughter ] heres a list of everything im allergic to. Love [ laughter ] [ laughter ] jimmy i lived in the back of a walgreens for three years, because my arm was stuck in the Blood Pressure machine thats where i found him. I took him home, hosed him off in his yard, and nursed him back to help with muscle milk. Jimmy soon i weighed 600 pounds [ laughter ] it was a long hard road to lose all that weight. And i couldnt have done it without a good friend. But after his friend escaped, i stepped in. [ laughter ] the rest is rock n roll history. Thanks zynerma [ cheers and applause announcer once daily zynerma. Breathe deep [ cheers and applause jimmy a lot of we did a a lot of them. [ laughter ] that went on. Jimmy we went we did a lot of commercials i forgot how many commercials we ended up doing. Yeah, very experimental [ laughter ] jimmy my thanks to Robert Downey jr. Everybody [ cheers and applause more tonight show after the break. Come on back [ cheers and applause when we see enter through our doors. We dont see who youre against, or for. Whether tomorrow will be light or dark. All we see in you, is a spark. We see your kindness and humanity. The strength of each community. The more we look the more we find the sparks that make america shine. I need all the breaks, that i can get. At liberty butchumal cut. Liberty biberty cut. Well dub it. Liberty mutual customizes your Car Insurance so you only pay for what you need. Only pay for what you need. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. paul sprint has great news really great news amily. You can get both an unlimited plan. sprintern . And the powerful new iphone 11 paul . Included for just 35 a month when you switch. sprintern whoa. What a deal. paul and, sprint has a 100 total satisfaction guarantee. While i think their network and savings are great, you dont just have to take my word for it. Try it out and see the savings for yourself. So, take it to 11, with iphone 11 at sprint for people with hearing loss, visit sprintrelay. Com. Your happy place. Find your breaking point. Then break it. Every emergenc gives you a potent blend of nutrients so you can emerge your best, with emergenc. whistling conditions are protected. Vo a broken promise. Trump repeatedly tried to undermine coverage for 134 million americans with preexisting conditions. Mike he just doesnt care if you have a preexisting condition he wants to deny you access to coverage. If he is reelected, hell keep trying to do that and i think we cant let that happen. Vo as president , mike will lower costs, and protect americans with preexisting conditions. Mike im Mike Bloomberg and i approve this message. Where you can find games, news and highlights. All in one place, right on your tv. The new xfinity sports zone. Use your voice to search every stat, standing and score. Follow the teams you love and get notifications when the games about to start, so youll never miss a minute. With the xfinity sports zone. Everybody wins. Now thats simple, easy, awesome. Click, call or visit a store for details. [ cheers and applause jimmy our next guest is an emmy nominated comedian who you know from saturday night live. She also produces, writes and stars in shrill which returns january 24th on hulu please welcome aidy bryant [ cheers and applause jimmy oh, you looked gorge i know. [ laughter ] jimmy welcome back to the show, pal. You have a new snl, is it next saturday . Yeah, next week were back. Jimmy the 25th, adam driver and is it halsey . Halsey. Jimmy oh, i love that. Yeah. You know it. Jimmy you know its going to be good, come on. Oh, baby. Jimmy youve had a great season this season oh, thanks. Jimmy i actually i was just thinking about you because we were doing our sketch right there, me and robert and i lost it a little bit but oh, yeah. Jimmy just a little bit. A little . Jimmy just a little. Just a tiny bit, yeah. But you you lost a little bit this do know what i am talking about . Yeah, i had i would call my worse break of my lifetime. Jimmy i dont ever really i dont really see you break. I really try not to jimmy yeah like, cause it scares me but this was you know, it was kind of like a political sketch and i was fully the straight man. Had not a punch line in the bunch. And jimmy who was the host it was woody harrelson. Jimmy oh, yeah, thats right. And it was the first show of the season and basically we were doing the sketch where it was flashbacks to old clips jimmy yup. But instead of playing actual clips, we would do it live so they would play a little package. We would change our jackets, change our hair as fast as we could. And our dressers would come in and change us. And basically there were so many changes between dress and hair that my dresser walked in while the camera was on me and i was looking in the monitor being like, thats audrey [ laughter ] audreys on camera. And, i mean, but i could also feel her there and i heard someone yell, no. [ laughter ] and then basically it cut back we had a quick change. It cut back to me. And i knew that i had the straightest, most serious line that was like the moral arc of justice. Jimmy yeah and i was like, cool, i have to get through this seriousass line, knowing that my dresser audrey was just on screen. Jimmy and the crowd was going nuts so it yeah. Jimmy when that happens though the audience everyone starts laughing. Theyre cause theyre seeing it live its actually happening on tv. And the place gets hot yes, and also, i think, like, cecily was next to me. And kenan was next to me and they both knew i had this line that i had been struggling with in rehearsal. And then it was like, okay, now it is time to say it again. I mean, you could see. Jimmy well, i want to show everyone a clip. Okay. Jimmy because its just worth seeing here is aidy bryant breaking on snl. Watch this it feels like a real turning point in the trump candidacy mmhm no, its he gonna win. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause wow, mr. Maddox, ill admit that you were on to Something Back then. [ laughter ] i believe [ laughter ] i believe this arc of no. I believe in the arc of the whole universe is long but it bends towards justice [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause yeah. Jimmy done not good. Jimmy done out. Couldnt get it back. Jimmy whos laugh was behind you making you laugh more cecily jimmy thats cecily . Was just knew she wasnt on camera jimmy yup. And was fully looking at me going, like, haha. Jimmy kind of, like, that close to your face yes, absolutely jimmy thats the best part i love that. When you are off camera and you can laugh. And youre like, oh, its just torture. Well, we love you on there but i got to say shrill is fantastic as well. Oh, thank you jimmy congrats on that [ cheers and applause season two season two is available is it next week yeah, january 24th. Jimmy the whole season eight episodes, all at once boom jimmy wow. Yeah. Jimmy so i dont know how you have the time to do all this i got problems. [ laughter ] jimmy yeah, no, yeah its im tired jimmy but you its a great show and you said in some interview i was reading that you wish there were shows like this when you were growing up. Yeah, it fully is, like, the show i dreamed of seeing as a young girl, to see a fat lead kind of living her damn life, having some sex. And [ cheers ] you know i mean, just that she has a full life thats fully dynamic. Jimmy yeah and that shes sort of past the point of hating herself anymore. And shes trying to get on with her dreams, you know jimmy who thats fantastic. [ cheers and applause its very great. Did you is this your idea did you come up with this . No, its based on a book by lindy west called shrill. And its her memoir. And so we kind of used that as like a road map for the first season and the Second Season is kind of not using it as a road map. And its kind of exploring new stuff. But its really fun. Jimmy its really, really funny. I want to show everyone a clip heres aidy bryant in the new season of shrill. Take a look. What are the chuckles about chuckle maniac oh, my boyfriend is meeting my parents tonight for the first time oh, thats a big deal are you freaking i mean, my dads met him but my mom hasnt. And she can be extremely judgmental so i remember when my mom met my boyfriend and now hes my step dad god [ laughter ] im sorry. Its not so bad hes a good guy. I took his last name is he the guy who always picks you up from here yeah. Cute, right . [ light laughter ] [ cheers and applause jimmy come on. Come on. One, two, punch. You and jo firestone aidy bryant, everybody [ cheers and applause the new season of shrill returns january 24th on hulu Little Big Town performs for us next stick around everybody [ cheers and applause i wrote this a long time ago. I dont know how old i was. I hope someday i will be on a real football team. Im katie sowers, offensive assistant coach for the San Francisco 49ers. Im not just here to be the token female, im here to help us win. The surface pro helps me get whats in my head and get it out on to the field. I would want to tell this little girl to keep pushing herself, your dreams coming. If youre living with hiv, and ask your doctor about biktarvy. Biktarvy is a complete, onepill, onceaday treatment used for hiv in certain adults. Its not a cure, but with one small pill, biktarvy fights hiv to help you get to and stay undetectable. Thats when the amount of virus is so low it cant be measured by a lab test. Research shows people who take hiv treatment every day and get to and stay undetectabe can no longer transmit hiv through sex. Serious side effects can occur, including kidney problems and kidney failure. Rare, lifethreatening side effects include a buildup of lactic acid and liver problems. Do not take biktarvy if you take dofetilide or rifampin. Tell your doctor about all the medicines and supplements you take, if you are pregnant or breastfeeding, or if you have kidney or liver problems, including hepatitis. If you have hepatitis b, do not stop taking biktarvy without talking to your doctor. Common side effects were diarrhea, nausea, and headache. If youre living with hiv, keep loving who you are. And ask your doctor if biktarvy is right for you. For ralphies appointment. Whos his groomer . Carrie. Full groom for sure what . I just booked ralphies appointment online. That work . Wait you what . Its that easy download the app or book online at petsmart. Com where these sunsoaked litea leavesactory. Are picked at the peak of freshness. For a naturally smooth taste. And drinking lipton every day can help support a Healthy Heart so josh, you going for our drive safe and save discount . Yup, using the app. Driving safe. Heh. You wanna go . Wanna go bro . Hey, uh, do not mess with my discount. Woooo you could save up to 30 . Lets go nice to meet you, go get em tiger woooo sounds like youve got this . Yeah. Definitely. Get a discount up to 30 with drive safe and save™ from state farm. Seaonly abreva cany to help sget rid of it in. As little as 2 1 2 days when used at the first sign. Abreva starts to work immediately to block the virus and protect healthy cells. Abreva acts on it. So you can too. A former army medic, made of the we maflexibility to handle members like kate. Whatever monday has in store and tackle four things at once. So when her car got hit, she didnt worry. She simply filed a claim on her usaa app and said. I got this. Usaa insurance is made the way kate needs it easy. She can even pick her payment plan so its easy on her budget and her life. Usaa. What youre made of, were made for. Usaa [ cheers and applause jimmy performing sugar coat from their new album nightfall, please welcome back Little Big Town [ cheers and applause i turn th bathroom light o to take my makeup of look at myself in the eye and wonder wh i wear it anyway another car drives b i wonder where you are the kids are all in bed and everything but you is in its plac from the street view looking in its pretty as a picture a home sweet hom sometimes i wish i liked drinkin sometimes i wish i liked pill wish i could sleep with a stranger someone like me never wil sometimes i hardly can stand i i just smile wit a lump in my throa sometimes i wish i could bear it didnt have to wea this sugar coat [ cheers and applause passed down from my mom she wore it so wel shed rest it on my shoulder say its colder out there than you thin would i recognize myself would anybody else if i took the damn thing off and burned it u sometimes i wish i liked drinking sometimes i wish i liked pills wish i could sleep with a strange but someone like me never will sometimes i hardly can stand it i just smile with a lump in my throat sometimes i wish i could bear i didnt have to wear this sugar coat this damn sugar coat and one of these nights ill meet you in the driveway and tell you to go to hel just go to hel sometimes i wish i liked drinking sometimes i wish liked pill wish i could sleep with a stranger someone like me never will sometimes i hardly can stand it i just smile with a lump in my throa sometimes i wish i could bear it didnt have to wear this sugar coa this damn sugar coat oh this sugar coa this damn sugar coat [ cheers and applause jimmy oh, brilliant brilliant come on. Come on. Little big town come on thats how you do it nightfall is out this friday well be right back, everybody [ cheers and applause dr little. You can talk to animals . Yes. The adventure begins. Whats the worse that can happen . Im too beautiful to die. Step away from the light. Ah, there is no light. Im alive [ cheers and applause jimmy my thanks to Robert Downey jr. , aidy bryant Little Big Town [ cheers and applause this friday, this friday and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania [ cheers and applause stay tuned for late night with seth meyers. Thank you for watching have a great night i hope to see you tomorrow byebye, everybody [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause announcer from 30 Rockefeller Plaza in new york, its late night with seth meyers. Tonight billy porter 2020 president ial candidate senator Amy Klobuchar. Music from Caitlyn Smith featuring the 8g band with fred armisen [ cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. [ cheers and applause seth good evening. Im seth meyers. This is late night. How is everybody doing tonight [ cheers and applause that is great to hear. In that case, lets get to the news House Speaker nancy pelosi today announced the name of seven democrats who will serve as