Look at how hes standing. Lou from hollywood, its Jimmy Kimmel Live tonight snoop dogg, ms. Pat, and music from october london. With cleto and the cletones. And now, jimmy kimmel [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thank you. Hola. Im jimmy, im the host of the show. Thanks for watching. Thank you for coming. Im glad youre here. Im glad were able to do a show tonight. I have to tell you, i dont know if you heard about this. Last night we had an eventful night. I went home and got a call saying the Fire Department was at the show. Turns out we had smoke pouring out of the vents outside our edit rooms, then coming out of the building. They had to clear the whole place. Fortunately, everything and everyone was okay. The firefighters even left us a photo. Posing together at my desk. [ laughter ] they fixed it all. Thank you, guys. By the way, i want to say, the Fire Department, if you see any smoke coming from the building tonight, thats just because snoop is here, were fine. [ cheers and applause ] did you go back and visit snoop, guillermo . Guillermo of course, jimmy, yeah. Thats my favorite day, yeah. Jimmy i mean, i can barely see your eye balls. [ laughter ] guillermo a dream come true. Jimmy are you feeling all right . Guillermo im feeling great, jimmy. Jimmy can i get you some snacks . Guillermo no, no, its good. Jimmy ill be keeping an eye on you. You know, theres still no one home in the house of representatives. Congress has now gone 16 days without a speaker. Without a speaker, nothing gets done. Even less than the usual nothing can get done. Jim jordan, in the first vote, was short 20 republican votes. In the second group, he was short 22 republican votes, and now i guess hes going for 24. So ill just say this. We made we made the pitch to members on the resolution as a way to lower the temperature. And get back to work. We decided that wasnt where were going to go. Im still running for speaker, and i plan to go to the floor and get the votes and win this race. But i want to go talk with a few of my colleagues. Particularly, i want to talk with the 20 individuals who voted against me so that we can move forward ask begin to work for the american people. Jimmy yeah. He talked to the 20. And they dont care. Theyre not voting for him. [ laughter ] this would be a very embarrassing situation if these farright republicans were capable of being embarrassed. But they are currently at odds over whether to keep trying with jim jordan or to give temporary power to the interim speaker patrick mchenry. That is a plan that did not appeal to the guy who got them into this mess in the first place, the human bobblehead known as matt gaets. I think that im against speaker lite, im against bud light. [ laughter ] jimmy thats. Im against traffic lights. Im against the guiding light. Im against judith light. Didnt care for her on whos the boss . [ laughter ] let me tell you something, unless the constitution was printed on the back of a can of Monster Energy drink, matt gaetz has not read it. [ laughter ] matts fellow congressdemon, Marjorie Taylor green, also is pushing back against the idea of an interim speaker. I do not support this plan. Republican voters work too hard to give us the majority for us to enter some sort of temporary speakership. Our conference has a responsibility to the american people, to our districts, to Work Together and unify. And this conference is absolutely broken. And the reason why were broken is because republicans worked with democrats and put us here. Jimmy right. Thats who did this, the democrats did it. [ laughter ] you know, for a group of people who tell you the democrats dont know what theyre doing, they sure do give democrats a lot of credit for what theyre doing. [ laughter ] republicans are reaching across the aisle to grab each other by the throat right now. They had a tense threehour meeting and agreed on nothing. At one point, Kevin Mccarthy yelled at matt gaetz and another rep lunged at matt gaetz. There are threats being made against those who did not vote for jordan. Nick lalota of new york, a republican, got a message saying, go eff yourself and die. Don bacon of nebraska reported that his wife got an anonymous text saying, your husband will not hold any Political Office ever again. George santos says a helicopter full of ninjas landed on his front lawn. [ laughter ] fortunately he was able to fight them all off and he won. Even fox news is trying to bully the holdouts into voting for jordan. This is a message a producer from hannity sent to a congressperson who elected to remain anonymous. Hello, stephanie from the hannity show with fox news. Sources tell hannity that rep is not supporting jim jordan for speaker. Can you please let me know if this is accurate . And, if true, hannity would like to know why during a war breaking out between israel and hamas, with the war in ukraine, with the wide open borders, with a budget thats unfinished, why would this rep be against jim jordan for speaker . Its the washington version of getting buttonholed by joey knuckles. [ laughter ] wasnt much in the envelope this week, boss aint gonna like it. This Pressure Campaign from camp jordan, its not working. It didnt go over even with the soontobeimprisoned congressman george santos, who wrote im for jim jordan for speaker but, if the nasty hatred and attacks against some of my colleagues continue, i will be joining them in protest. America first always however, attacking good patriots is not the way to get them on your side. We need to have dialogue to bring them on board team jordan you know its bad when youre getting scolded by a man who was accused of stealing puppies from the amish. [ laughter ] even President Biden weighed in on jordans uphill battle for the gavel. Jimmy look at that, mr. Sarcastic on his way home from a war zone. [ cheers and applause ] hes even wearing his sassy zipup. [ laughter ] speaking of sassy, we got some more hot goss from mitt romneys upcoming book, dont pee on my dockers and tell me its raining. [ laughter ] first, romney claimed oprah wanted him to be her running mate in 2020. In a new excerpt, romney talks about trying to form a unity ticket with ted cruz in 2016. A unity ticket . The only thing americans agree on as a unit is that ted cruz sucks. [ laughter ] thats some unity. And look, i have a lot of respect for mitt romney. But trying to fight donald trump by teaming up with ted cruz . Thats like trying to fight chlamydia by teaming up with aids. [ laughter ] its not really a what a combination. Mitt romney and ted cruz. Youve got one guy with the personality of a blowup doll and another whos definitely having sex with them all the time. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] theres a lot of interestingly stuff in this book. Romney says when they were dating, Britney Spears cheated on him with another senator. Did you know . Oh, wait, i may be confusing my books, i dont know. [ laughter ] donald trump had yet another legal setback today. One of his former lawyers turned coconspirator, sidney powell. [ laughter ] this weird human lady pled guilty to six charges in georgia in the case related to trumps efforts to overturn the election results. Among other things, powell hired people to barge into a voting location in Coffee County where they broke into the voting machines. Turns out, thats not a very lawyerly thing to do. As part of the deal, powell gets six years of probation and appears to be cooperating with prosecutors in their case against the others, which includes trump. Oh, man, the chicken mcnuggets are coming home to roost. [ laughter ] the rats are jumping off the spraytanic. The big, beautiful walls are closing in. And somewhere up there, john mccain is smiling. You know, he likes people who dont get caught. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] and this probably resulted in some ketchup on the walls. Joe bidens campaign now has more followers on truth social than the trump campaign. For real. Team biden has only been on truth social since monday and theyre already up by about 5,000 followers. Not a great sign for trump when he cant even win the popular vote on his own social media site. [ laughter ] fortunately, he doesnt really care about silly stuff like followers and crowd size. But how funny is it going to be when trump accuses his own website of being rigged against him . [ laughter ] it will be the best. President biden gave a big primetime speech from the white house tonight during which he made a case for sending aid to israel and ukraine. Biden spoke at 8 00 p. M. Or as he calls it, he pulled an allnighter. [ laughter ] biden ended his speech by saying, and now back to those rowdy young kids on the golden bachelor. Which was a nice shoutout for us. [ laughter ] i dont know if youve been watching this bachelor in paradise. Fortunately the president finished his speech, because we would have missed a major development. For the past couple of weeks, we have been following the saga of a woman named sam, who found herself in a bit of a predicament. Jimmy im so glad the Writers Strike ended in time to bring us that, you know . [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] only in america. Only in america would a president ial address about a war in israel be followed by paradise poop watch. [ laughter ] were living in a very stupid time. I do have an update on sam, by the way. And i dont know how to say this, so ill just say it. Sam has not pooped yet. No so shes doing okay. But theres been no movement with respect to that just yet. Jimmy oh, thanks for letting us know. [ laughter ] i dont know about you. I dont think i can wait until next week to find out what happened. So we tracked sam down and joining us now, the new face of american constipation. Say hello to sam jeffries. [ cheers and applause ] hi, sam. Hi, thanks for having me. Jimmy what happened . Did they steal all your furniture from your apartment . [ laughter ] you would think. Jimmy yeah. How are you doing . Im great. How are you . Jimmy im good. Hows it going . [ laughter ] never been better, honestly. Jimmy good. Everythings good . You know, i dont want to brag or anything. But i pooped several times. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy sam, when you were a little girl, is this how you dreamed your life would turn out . [ laughter ] kind of. I always thought something would be crazy. But not this crazy. Jimmy how did this happen . Do they not have activia in paradise . I mean, really. [ laughter ] they have everything in paradise. Laxatives, miralax, anything i needed. Except sleep. Jimmy none of it worked . Are people now recognizing you for this . Yeah. Im known as the queen of ivs, or poop girl. Jimmy when you come out of the bathroom at a restaurant, are you getting highfives . Whats going on . [ laughter ] yep, highfives, knuc jimmy youve become like the Kim Kardashian of constipation, you know . [ laughter ] i really am. Its sad. Jimmy do you have a message for other publicly constipated people . [ laughter ] my wife, for instance, says she has never pooped in her whole life. Right . Isnt that right . Never. [ cheers and applause ] shes going on like 45 years. Is there anything you can do to help her . Sleep, thats all i got. Jimmy youve got to sleep. See, she says sleep. Are you listening . Sleep, yeah. Dont sleep with me, though. Because i dont want to [ laughter ] yeah. Sam, im glad youre okay. I hope this doesnt happen again. Thank you. Jimmy if it does, will you me either. Jimmy will you let us know . I dont know how you can let us know. Maybe well send cameras to your home. Yeah, do you mind . Ill make sure i call you guys. Jimmy thank you for sharing your struggle and your journey with us. Thank you. Jimmy i want you to know from now on, i think i speak for all of us, whenever we get stopped up, we will always think of you. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] appreciate it. Jimmy all right. Jimmy one more thing before we forge ahead. Its time to bleep and blur the big moments of the week whether they need it or not. Its this week in unnecessary censorship. Jim jordan is strategic, scrappy, tough, and principled. He is a mentor, aabove all he is a [ bleep ]er. I have a lot of respect for him, ive [ bleep ]ed him for years. We cant sit around and suck our [ bleep ]s and hope the world will wait. Then the headlines came out. Mike lindells going to [ bleep ] his own [ bleep ]. Blah, blah, blah. You know . Are you sure that you want to [ bleep ] again . Yes. [ bleep ]ing off our [ bleep ] tonight, richard . Alias michael sweeney. The Sheriffs Office said they couldnt verify that identity. They finger [ bleep ]ed him twice, but that didnt reveal who he is either. My dad almost got into a fistfight in a restaurant over a man blowing his [ bleep ] at a taubl table in the restaurant. Mick and i [ bleep ] each other. Oh my god, whoo in the middle of the night ill get up, if i cant sleep, ill go down to the stalls and [ bleep ] a horse. Why do you [ bleep ] horses so much . Because theyre beautiful and powerful. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy well. Weve got a fun show tonight. Ms. Pat is here. We have music from october lemon. And well be right back with snoop doggy dog we made it bmo has arrived. Hello . You said it. Hello to more ways to save money, grow your wealth, grow your business. Just what we needed, another big bank. Not so fast. How many banks do you know that reward you for saving every month . Hes got a good point. Did i mention bmo has more feefree atms than the two largest us banks combined . Uh, bmo . Just beemo, actually. Quick question, will all this stuff fit in your car . should i get rid of the mug . Bmo [ cheers and applause ] jimmy hi, there. Welcome back to the show. Tonight, her new show is called ms. Pat settles it, the very funny ms. Pat is with us. Then later, making his television debut, he was signed to Death Row Records by none other than snoop dogg himself. His latest is called the rebirth of marvin, music from october london. [ cheers and applause ] next week we have new shows with, lets see. Tiffany haddish, olivia rodrigo, meg ryan, david duchovny, eric andre, jeff ross, joe walsh, howie long and Terry Bradshaw will be here, and we will have music from brothers osborne and tate mcrae. So please join us for all that. Our first guest tonight brings joy and some smoke everywhere he goes. He has his own breakfast cereal, hes got his own ice cream, hes got a new cookbook. Its called snoop dogg presents goon with a spoon. It comes out november 14th. Please welcome the next speaker of the u. S. House of representatives, snoop dogg [ cheers and applause ] jimmy good to see you. Hows it going . You got hold of guillermo before the show, didnt you . Hey, guillermo always makes his way to the bat cave. Jimmy he gravitates. [ laughter ] now were unsafe. Now were unprotected. We have no security. Weve got a superbaked security guard. And he always he always says no in the beginning. No, no, no. Okay, okay. [ laughter and applause ] jimmy well, snoop, i just want to first of all say i have a surprise for you. And i really wanted you to come here. And i thank you for coming here tonight because i have a surprise. But its not time for the surprise yet. In fact, guillermo, you can go get ready for the surprise. Guillermo okay, got it, jimmy. Jimmy all right. Were going to do that in a minute. Mike epps was here last night. Oh, thats my guy. Jimmy yeah, he told us he was in iceland on vacation looking for weed. Oh. Jimmy and so [ laughter ] he texted you. Hm. Jimmy said, do you know anyone in iceland . [ laughter ] and wouldnt you know it, you did know someone in iceland. [ cheers and applause ] well last time i checked, i was the plug to your plug. [ laughter ] im the connect. You know . Its good to have friends that have friends that, you know international and global. Jimmy yeah, yeah. Able to get you, you know, medicated and dedicated no matter where you at. [ laughter ] jimmy in a way that is your green card into every country, isnt it . Yes. Jimmy i have a list of countries i know youve been to. Tell me if you have a hookup in mexico. You have somebody in mexico . Si, senor. [ laughter and applause ] jimmy ireland . Im sure i do, mate. Jimmy what about north korea . Youve been there. Oh, no, aint got no [ laughter ] jimmy no, not there. How many days were you in north korea . I was over there about maybe seven, eight days. Sid a song with an artist named psi. Jimmy psi, yeah, yeah. Remember me and him . Jimmy we went to karaoke together. Psi was in north korea . We went over and did a few things. Jimmy hes from south korea, though, right . Aint they the same . No. [ laughter ] i went to korea with psi. We was on the south side. Jimmy its harder to think clearly when you dont have access to what you need, right . Right, i didnt have no access over there. Because that man over there dont play no games. I was over there being a studious american citizen. Jimmy you did the right thing. We could have lost you forever. I know. Jimmy india . Bollywood. [ laughter ] jimmy what about ease stone yeah . Estonia . Jimmy its got stony right in from. Im sure ive got some people over there. Jimmy good to know, quite a business youve got. Speaking of businesses, you have a lot of products youre involved with. Youre a entrepreneur. You find things youre interested in, you create things that you think you might like. And some of them seem to have a real connection to smoking. For instance your breakfast cereals. Snoop cereal. This ones cinnamon toasties. This ones fruity hoops with marshmallows. This one, i got to tell you, i think this one is absolutely brilliant. Because you basically combined 42 loops with lucky charms. [ laughter ] which is genius, you know . We from the hood, jimmy, we going to do what we got to do to get by. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy we got the cereals. Youve got ice cream. You got dr. Bombay Birthday Party, which is kind of perfect for tonight. Thats kind of good. I want some of that, jimmy. Jimmy you can have youre more than welcome to have some. I think i have spoons here also. Theres the Birthday Party two birthday parties, yeah. Well, it is almost your birthday, isnt it . Uhhuh. Jimmy tomorrows the big day. [ cheers and applause ] i dont know if you thought about this. Going to have some of those . Look out. [ cheers ] jimmy have you ever giving a little now, this is a Birthday Party, right . Mm mm this screaming like bob demon. [ laughter ] jimmy what time do you actually eat breakfast . 8 00. At night. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy by the way, i could easily polish this whole thing this whole box off. Its good, right . If they was nasty, you couldnt keep eating them like that. Jimmy this is my weakness, this is my kryptonite. I like this, too. Because this is either for this maze is for kids or to measure how stoned you are. [ laughter ] its a maze that has no other route other than directly to where youre supposed to go. Its not a maze. Its just a line. [ laughter ] if youve got a dumb kid, this is the perfect [ laughter ] all right. Well, listen. Youve got your cookbook here. Who is this i remember this guy. E40. Jimmy yeah, e40. He was all over the Golden State Warriors games. Yeah, a rapper, businessman, rapper, entrepreneur. What we did was combined for a cookbook. This is my land. I had a book that came out a couple of years ago called from crook to cook. Jimmy i have that book. Which is a bestseller, you understand me . He should do one because hes a great cook, easily in the industry. He created his book, which is the goon with the spoon. Jimmy Fried Chicken and french toast sandwiches. Mochi muffins with pineapple and coconut. Have you had all these things . E40 is a hell of a chef. Jimmy air fryer pizza alfredo. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Jimmy fried pickles. Fried everything. Fried everythings fried. Even the long island ice teas are fried, everybody. Yes, sir. Jimmy all right. Well, listen. Enough of this. I have a surprise for you. Were going to take a break. A break . Jimmy yep, were going to take a quick break. My kind of break . Jimmy yeah, whatever kind of break you like. [ cheers and applause ] when we come back, snoop dogg. Well be right back. So i write him all these letters and i throw them in the trash cuz i miss the way he kisses and the way he made me laugh yeah i pour my little heart out but as im hitting send i picture all the faces of my disappointed friends i wanna get him back i wanna make him really jealous wanna make him feel bad, oh i want sweet revenge i want to get him back, back, back cut so this is the, uh, place is that. Crown molding . Did you do that . Hold on, are you on the raisin bran crunch . Good boy do you want to see the kitchen . [ am pm by notd begins. ] when you can save on good gather groceries in all the fall flavors. When Quality Ingredients bring more to the table. And when youre serving up taste they love at low prices. [ am pm by notd ends. ] thats totally target. Is someone trying to steal your butterfinger this halloween . Call the bfi. No one lays a finger on your butterfinger. You got two jacks. And then my grand slam. I signed a ball for you. Okay. And it says papa i love you. Why did you do that . Because youve taught me everything about baseball. Oh hunny bunny, thats so sweet. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy we are back with snoop dogg. Snoop is hey, snoop next month is the 30th anniversary of your album doggy style. [ cheers and applause ] which is quite crazy. I think thats when we met, actually, right about then. Yeah. 30 years ago, man. Jimmy do you remember the first time you went into a record store and saw your album . Yeah, it was crazy, man. Because it was lines of people buying the record. It blew my mind that they actually wanted to buy the record. I remember i was like 19. So it was like new for me. It was fresh for me. And it was fun to watch to see how people gravitated to me and my music, and i was like not used to it, not used to people wanting an autograph and a picture. Being very shy, you know. Unsure about myself. Jimmy what record store was it . Vip. Jimmy vip down in long beach . Yes, sir. Jimmy that was your local record store that youd go to . Yes. Jimmy what did you buy there . Do you remember buying records there . The first record i bought there was ring my bell. [ cheers ] jimmy really . Yeah. Jimmy thats a good song. Thats a real good song. The single or the album . The 45. Put the little yellow thing in the middle. Jimmy those have gone away. Them was the good old days. Jimmy are you ready for the surprise . What kind of surprise, jimmy . Your surprises is different, man. [ laughter ] jimmy this is a good surprise. Aint no animals, right . Jimmy no animals. All right, cool. Jimmy no animals. Okay. So do you know what a half birthday is . In our family with the kids we celebrate half birthdays. So its like we sing happy birthday, we have half a cake. Its six months before your birthday. Wow. Jimmy or after your birthday. So your birthday is right now. Were after midnight, its 10 20. [ cheers and applause ] six months to the day after 10 crash 20 is . 10 20 is . 4 20. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy so on 4 20 i was thinking, i wonder what the half birthday of 4 20 is. I look in my phone and i see in my calendar its who, my friend snoop doggs birthday on 10 20, and it absolutely blew my mind. And i thought, why shouldnt this be a holiday . [ cheers and applause ] send in guillermo. [ cheers and applause ] guillermo hello, snoop dogg. Hello, guillermo. Jimmy i present you the official proclamation that jimmy is going to read to us. Jimmy thank you very much, guillermo. I love your glasses. Whereas Calvin Broadus jr. Known as snoop doggy dog has made significant contributions to the pop layerization of marijuana, aka weed, aka pot, icky, and jolly green sticks. [ cheers and applause ] mr. Doggs birthday miraculously falls on the midway point to 4 20, a coincidence that is totally tripping me out right now. We encourage tokers around the world to lift their began lets of gin and juice, blaze their blunts, scooby their doobies, share their satans spinach to pay tribute as i, jazimmie kazimmle, proclaim the 20th day of october to be dogfathers day. [ cheers and applause ] id like everyone to bow your heads and say bow wow wow yippy yo yippy yamen. Snoop snoop, not only are we celebrating this momentous occasion in lang, its being celebrated all around the world. It gives me the greatest pleasure to send my warmest congratulations and best wishes. Congratulations, honey bunch. Lets celebrate together soon, and i love you, i love you, i love you. Im so proud of you, man. And so blessed and humble to be a part of your journey. I would like to send my warmest congratulations to you, and thank you. I celebrate you as a forward thinking, visionary leader. Keep it going, man. Keep the faith. And congratulations to you and your wonderful family. Thank you for what youve done. Your work is an inspiration. Translator when you see gray smoke coming out of my chimney, i am not dead, i am doggfathers day. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy wow. President biden was unable to be here tonight, but he asked me to present you with the firstever president ial medal of weedom. [ cheers ] for you, snoop dogg on this special day. [ cheers and applause ] is there anything you would like to say to america on this 10 20 . Im just so, so im so at a loss for words. [ laughter ] but i just want to say to everyone out there one nation under a bud leaf. [ laughter ] and were gonna blow one bef we pull one. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy congratulations. I hope everyone will celebrate tomorrow. The first annual doggfathers day 10 20. Banks and schools may be closed but the dispensaries will definitely be open. Thank you, snoop dogg. Snoop dogg, everybody [ cheers and applause ] goon with the spoon comes out november 14th and snoop cereal and dr. Bombay ice cream are in stores now. Well be back with ms. Pat. My active Psoriatic Arthritis can make me feel like im losing my rhythm. With skyrizi to treat my skin and joints, im getting into my groove. uplifting music along with significantly clearer skin. Skyrizi helps me move with less joint pain, stiffness, swelling, and fatigue. And is just 4 doses a year, after 2 starter doses. Skyrizi attaches to and reduces a source of excess inflammation that can lead to skin and joint symptoms. With skyrizi 90 clearer skin and less joint pain are possible. 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Big chuck, you sock rollin son of a. Who says you cant go for bold without going broke. Get the brands you want, the prices you want, whenever you want. Tj maxx where you can always afford to be you to the maxx. All that chocolate and caramel. And a ghoulish green cookie itsits more than more. Its more. groan errr yes its moreer all right [zombie arm pulls off] that costume is moreer whoa. Theres moreerrr to a twix is it menopause or Something Else . The menopause journey has stages. Learn about yours with clearblue menopause stage indicator. That tracks your fsh hormone levels. Combining them with your cycle data. Whats your menopause stage . Jimmy you should give snoop those glasses after were done. You dont even know what they say, do you . Guillermo you know what, im so high i havent seen it, hold on. Oh, 10 20, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] my skin has been so much smoother so much more hydrated. Its olay with olay hyaluronic body wash 95 of women had visiblybetter skin. 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No one lays a finger on your butterfinger. vo its another ultimate endless shrimp flavor drop with new tequila lime shrimp one of seven endless choices right now, only at red lobster welcome to fun dining boring. With over 40 delicious flavors, cirkul starts a party for your taste buds. No sugar, no calories, and no artificial flavors. Cirkul. Its your water, your way. Now with even more flavors. Available at walmart or drinkcirkul. Com. So this is the, uh, place is that. Crown molding . Did you do that . Hold on, are you on the raisin bran crunch . Good boy do you want to see the kitchen . [ cheers and applause ] jimmy hi, there, welcome back. Music from october london is on the way. Our next guest is a funny lady who rules a courtroom with an iron fist. Watch her new show ms. Pat settles it wednesday nights on b. E. T. Please say hello to the honorable ms. Pat. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy happy 10 20. Happy doggfather day to you. I tell you, your studio smells like my 21yearold sons car. Jimmy does it . He went to trade it in, they was like, hell, no. Jimmy does he try to hide it, light candles he used to. I let him smoke now. He lost weight. I got on weed, tried to lose weight, and i gained weight. Jimmy i dont know that its known as a weight loss product. He told me, mama, i smoke because it make me go to the gym. So i started smoking and i went to sleep. [ laughter ] jimmy youve had such an interesting life. The idea, you know, that you had trouble with the law and then you turned your life into a very popular show. Youre nominated for an emmy right now. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. Jimmy youve got all these great things going on. Particularly interesting because, you know, you are now hosting a youre on the other side of the bench right now, can i give a shoutout to the Fulton County jail . Jimmy yes. In atlanta. Im trying to get my head shot i mean, my mugshot, to prove to everybody i used to be skinny. Jimmy hold on a minute. This is when you were arrested at what age . 19. I was sexy, too. Jimmy 19 years old. You were skinny. Jimmy were you on that weed diet at the time . No, i was stealing. Jimmy you were stealing, okay. And you got arrested, and you want to have the mugshot . I want to have the mugshot because its also representing when i used to sell crack. And i was really small. [ laughter ] are you guys judging me, white people . [ laughter ] jimmy its rare that somebody has fond memories of their mugshot. Uh i was younger, too. Jimmy yeah, right. I keep telling my husband, you should have seen me. [ laughter ] jimmy so, yeah, if we can track that down, it would be great. Now that youre a judge, maybe youll have some camaraderie with these people. Im on the other side of the beverage. When i went to go pitch this show to b. E. T. , i had somebody else in mind. They was like, why dont you be the judge . Im like, im a convicted felon. They said, its tv, you could be jesus. [ laughter ] jimmy that could be a great show if we could get jesus. Could you imagine me as jesus . [ applause ] id ob time. You wouldnt still be waiting on me. [ laughter ] jimmy so you went and pitched them. You had somebody else you were going to produce the show . Yes, i was going to put someone else in the judges seat. They said, no, why dont you give it a try . So i gave it a try. Its nice being on the other side of the bench. Jimmy is it fun . Yes jimmy it is fun. Yeah, i dont get locked up this time. [ laughter ] jimmy yeah, but its also fun when you get to be because ive done this on our show. Well have people have arguments youve been to jail . Jimmy no, no, not yet. [ laughter ] i ruled on disputes. And i love it. I love it because i get home, no one listens to me. [ laughter ] the disputes, i am completely ignored, i might as well just be a silent force in the house. You a man, we dont ever less sell at all. Jimmy yeah, yeah, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] sometimes ill say, does anyone hear the sound of my voice right now . And no one responds. [ laughter ] to be the person who gets to decide is great, isnt it . Yes, yes. And i love it, too. Because i get to determine if youre going to win money, and when they get unruly on my show, i can say shut the hell up. Jimmy right. [ laughter ] youve been on one of these judge shows before, right . I sure have. Jimmy you were on with judge joe brown . I was on judge joe brown because i own property in atlanta and my tenant ran off with my money. Three things you dont play with. My food, my money, and my family. [ cheers ] jimmy in that order . However you want it. So i go down to the Water Company and i slide this boy some lunch money, 50. I say, tell me where she moved at. He told me where she moved. I sent her a i sued her in the mail. I said, 20 years ago id have whooped you up. [ laughter ] im gonna treat you like white people, im going to sue your ass. Jimmy good, good. Judge joe brown called and we ended up on judge joe brown. Jimmy we have a clip here of you as plaintiff. The fridge was filthy, the stove was filthy, then you had to dispose of the, shall we say, the toys . Booty beads. I didnt know they were booty beads. Im picking them up out of the bathroom. She told me they were booty beads. I dont decorate my behind. I got stretch marks from both kids, i dont need to decorate my butt. [ cheers and applause ] could i just say that that wig was before the money . [ laughter ] oh, my wig was horrible. I think i took it out of a bag. [ laughter ] jimmy who won the case . I won the case. Jimmy you did. I had all my evidence. I was not playing around. I was so mad. Im in there picking up booty beads. I didnt know what a booty bead was. And put them down. They was dirty. Who left these mardi gras beads in my house . I have a handful of nasty, crappy beads. Im so glad i didnt put them around my neck. Jimmy i love to imagine the closed captioning person right now typing the words booty beads over and over again. [ laughter ] she was so mad, too, she was so mad. But i got my money . You did . How much did you get . I got 3,700, and i was happy until i realized they taxed it. Jimmy oh, they taxed your yeah, we dont could have se this behind the grocery store. [ laughter ] jimmy youre on a standup comedy tour right now, a long one, right . I am, called your girl done made it. Jimmy your girl done made it. [ cheers and applause ] i was reading that you road tripped for the first time to a gig in like a lat of years, right . Yeah, so i had gallstone problem, my gallbladder needed to be removed. The doctor said, you cant fly for two weeks. Im like, im flying. I dont want to drive from atlanta to raleigh to baltimore. You know, my husband is retired and everybodys like, youre not going to die on us, we need your paycheck. [ laughter ] so my whole family got in the car with me and rolled with me to raleigh, to baltimore. Once we get to baltimore, i have a son that loves to eat gas station food. Jimmy oh, is this part of the weed diet . [ laughter ] no. Jimmy this is your other son . He dont smoke weed, i wish he did. Everywhere we stop, he had to have a gas station hot dog and a pizza. And i dont know what it is the gas station food, but i had to go in one gas station, i had to scream, do not let him eat this, he got Heart Disease jimmy really . Did he listen . No, he love gas station food. Jimmy specifically gas station food . He would take you out on a date to kwik trip. [ cheers ] jimmy has he always been like that . No, hes like, mama, you got to try, its delicious. Ever since they put chairs in where you can dine . Oh my god, he eat breakfast, lunch, dinner. He feed it to my grandkids. Hes so fat now. The hot dogs is coming out his ears. [ laughter ] jimmy im so sorry to hear that. But also delighted to hear it, honestly. Wow. Okay. Well, you know, maybe has he been in a restaurant . I think maybe he might like that more. He told me, gas station pizza, straight out of the oven at racetrack, will blow your mind. [ laughter ] jimmy thats what they say in italy. I think your deejay been there before, hes laughing. Jimmy yeah, yeah. These people here still eat breakfast products, theyre not laughing. [ laughter ] . Its great to have you here. Congratulationed on the shows. Ms. Pat settles it is on b. E. T. Wednesdays. Youre on a standup comedy store. Youll be appearing in gas stations telling them not to sell your son food. Exactly. Jimmy go see and get tickets for your girl done made it at mspatcomedy. Com. Ms. Pat, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] well be back with october london. California sky todos alcanzamos Las Estrellas sunny state of mind flexin all the time todo es dorado y nos gusta picante cause this place is caliente tamos enchilado feels so golden livin in the golden state with you feels so golden vive en el Estado Dorado oooh we got that drip, drip, drip come take a sip, sip, sip feels so golden vive en el Estado Dorado [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thanks to mr. 10 20, snoop dogg. Thanks to ms. Pat. Apologies to matt damon. Nightline is next, but first, his album is called the rebirth of marvin. You want to introduce the song snoop . Make some noise for back to your place, october london thank you, thank you. You guys are far too kind. Ah whoa yeah ah baby ive been thinking bout you and all of the things i want to do once the day becomes the night said ive been patient and ive been kind oh but my body is runnin out of time you said your clock on your walls is tickin so let me give you what you been missing so she said take me oh baby take me back to your place your place of residence so she said take me oh baby take me back to your place your place of residence oh ive been waiting baby waiting for a long time waiting on you for your heart to be mine oh before someone else comes to mind but when you oh when you told me that i was the one girl i took every hour and minute babe just to make sure that everything is right oh take me oh baby take me back to your place your place of residence so she said take me oh baby take me back to your place [ cheers and applause ] this is nightline. Tonight, sextortion. The search for online scrammers coming for the boys next door. This is an end running rampant. These people are professional con artists. Every day i tol