Afternoon. This i thought was interesting. She did it, she signed her name one letter at a time, using a different pen each time. She used 22 pens to sign her name. What is going on . Did she get an endorsement deal with bic . Its hard to argue youre not enjoying the impeachment when you turn it into a calligraphy class all of a sudden. Speaking of pelosi, she named impeachment managers including jerry nadler, adam schiff, and newly available red sox manager alex cora joined the team. They really want to win this. This is big stuff, only the third time in American History articles of impeachment have been sent to the senate, which means starting tuesday donald joanna trump will become the first former steak salesman to be tried for abuse of power and obstruction of congress. Senate Majority Leader Mitch Mcconnell insisted the trial will be fair, there will be arguments there will be evidence, and there will be a verdict, just not necessarily in that order. Most republicans Mitch Mcconnell wont even commit to questioning witnesses or admitting new evidence, even though yesterday, just yesterday we got bombshells from one of Rudy Giulianis ukraine men, lev parnas, who in addition to telling Rachel Maddow the president lied when he said he didnt know what he was up to, provided documents that clearly show rudy giuliani, the president s lawyer, specifically, at trumps direction, badgering the new president of ukraine, to announce an investigation into the bidens. Not to start one, to announce one. Theres a letter from rudy saying he was acting with the president s full knowledge and concept, on top of that we were introduced to a new member of the trump reverse, another shady character, robert hyde, this is a guy running for congress in northwestern connecticut. Before i show you his photo i would like you to close your eyes and imagine what the type of guy who would get involved in this ucraziness might lack like, okay . You got it . All right, now open your eyes. Thats robert hyde. [ laughter ] exactly what you imagine, right . [ laughter ] this guys a beauty. Hes a big trump supporter who last year, he was at trumps golf resort in miami, he had to be escorted off the premises by police because he believed a hitman was out to get him. Of course he is now connected to trump. These are some Text Messages robert hyde shared with lev parnas on the subject is of now former u. S. Ambassador to ukraine, marie yovanovitch, f that bitch, wow, cant believe trump hasnt fired this bitch, ill get right on in that. When confronted he wrote to a reporter from the daily beast, how low can little adam bull schiff go to take some texts my buddies and i wrote while we had a few drinks to some dweeb i met a few times, bull schiff is a desperate turd. Ah, the old drunk buddy turd defense, works every time. He was drunk and texting his buddies in the ukraine . Here are some other things that he drunk texted his buddies about the ambassador. A woman who it seemed he was having followed. He wrote, they are moving her tomorrow, shes talked to three people, her phone is off, computer is off, shes next to the embassy, not in the embassy, private security, been there since thursday, parnas writes back, interesting. They will let me know, shes on the move. Parnas responds, perfect. That address i sent checks out, its next to the embassy, they are willing to help if we, you would like a price, you can do anything in the ukraine with money, what i was told. Parnas writes back, lol. If you want her out, they need to make contact with security forces, wake up, yankees man, which i assume means rudy giuliani, who loves the yankees. Yeah, nothing to investigate there, senator mcconnell, that doesnt seem suspicious at all. Another picture of robert hyde. I wouldnt want to be behind those guys at the maralago omelette station, i tell you that. Only the best people. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] meanwhile, our fearless leader danny soprano had another rally where he covered all his favorite subjects. Six toilets and showers. Jimmy thats right. Hes back on the plumbing again. [ laughter ] in three years, somehow we went from drain the swamp to flush the toilet. This is good too. Trump was in rare form last night on the latest stop for his orange collar comedy tour. Anybody in here does not love their children . There are some. Come on, raise your hand. There are some. Like you know theyre brats. Theyre little brats. Theyre horrible human beings. Jimmy oh, well, thats not [ cheers and applause ] well, for once we agree. While trump was all milwaukeed up, the democrats are going at it in des moines. Did you watch the debate last night . All eyes last night were on Elizabeth Warren and bernie sanders, who are at odds after Elizabeth Warren claimed back in 2018, bernie told her he didnt believe a woman could win the election. Bernie pushed back hard, he said its a lie, he never said it. Im not sure that did much to convince the moderator, Abby Phillips of cnn. It seemed pretty clear which one of them she believes. Youre saying you never told senator warren that a woman could not win the election . That is correct. Senator warren, what did you think when senator sandrews sanders told you a woman could not win the election . Jimmy thats back on hbo on sunday, right . After the debate, you know, bernie and Elizabeth Warren are old friends. They actually met at Benjamin Franklins bar mitzvah. But that doesnt seem to be the case anymore. Watch what happened between them after the debate. Here now he tries to shake her hand, she kind of holds back. And they have a seemingly heated discussion. Theres been a lot of speculation about what was being said. Some said they werent arguing, some said she didnt want to shake bernies hand because it smells like bill cream and gefilte fish. Cnn released the audio of the conversation, and yes, it was an argument. I think you called me a liar on national tv . What . I think you called me a liar on national tv . No, lets not do it right now, you want to have that discussion, well have that discussion, you called me a liar, you told me lets not do it. I just want to say hi, bernie. Yeah, good. [ laughter and applause ] jimmy tom steyers like, get me back on my jet, quick its upsetting to see, because those two have too much in common to end a relationship over Something Like this. And in fact, this photo they posted this morning leads me to believe everythings going to be all right. And their grandson, Pete Buttigieg its always hardest on the kids. Bernie said he was sick and tired a bunch of times last night. At first i thought it might just be a crutch. But turns out might be his new campaign slogan. Bernie sanders is sick and tired of politics as usual, like corporate greed. I am sick and tired of trade agreements negotiated by the ceos the 1 . Sick and tired of billionaires. The health care system. Sick and tired of arguing with insurance companies. The department of motor vehicles. Sick and tired of filling out tomorrows. Irritable bowel syndrome. Sick and tired of talking to doctors. Tuna salad with too much mayonnaise. I am sick and tired. Voice mails that cut off before you finish talking. Sick and tired. Young punks who wear their jeans below their tushies. Sick and tired. Vote bernie sanders, hes sick and tired. Im bernie sanders, and im exhausted and ill. Jimmy that must be why he cares so much about health care. [ cheers and applause ] back on the trump side, the president s former spokesperson, Sarah Applebee sanders, made a big announcement this morning. She released the cover and title of her forth coming book which is called speaking for myself. If you study the photo you can see how natural she poses. Its really i havent read the book but based on just the cover ive learned something about her already. Sarah seems to be missing a thumb. Its why she never hitchhikes. Speaking for myself wasnt the original title for the book. Originally it was going to be called lying for a lunatic. I guess it didnt test as well among the base. They say this could be an especially bad year which is what they say every year. To raise awareness of flu prevention and to create a little bit of mischief too, we went over to the Lowes Hollywood hotel across the street where we cornered people in an elevator, the reporter pretending to be sick while doing interviews about the flu in tonights decision of eyewitness flus. [ coughing ] hey, sir, how are you . What is your name, sir . Berhand. Where are you from . Seattle, washington. What do you do . Im a physician. Can you give us some tips how to stay healthy during the flu season . Yes. My recommendation is [ coughing ] sorry. Go ahead. Youre the ceo of a major corporation. What do you tell your employees to do to stay healthy in a confined place like an elevator that were in [ coughing and sneezing ] im sorry, its not as bad as it sounds. Sounds pretty bad. How hard is it to avoid getting a flu in an elevator . Its very difficult. Why . You cant escape it. Right, because i someones touching you and hugging you and doing that kind of thing. What is this pin . This represents my company. Can i see that . [ coughing ] so small, i can barely read that its so small. [ of coming ] feel my forehead. Feel. Is that sweaty . Yes. Okay. Its the flu. What should i do . Pee it out. Pee it out . What do you mean . Lots of fluids and pee the bug out. Oh. I am not drinking out of that. You say that now. Why . Take a hit. No. Come on, dont be a total [ bleep ]. Nausea and vomiting and diarrhea . Thats what were seeing this year. Exactly. Ats what im seeing this year. Yeah, yeah. Nausea thats whats vomiting, and the diarrhea, its like some people think its funny but its really runny. Thats whats different about the season. Diarrhea. [ coughing ] i believe most of it is contamination. Touching your hand high five. Touching your nose, bingo. Thats how you get sick. To recap, the number one things to avoid the flu are . Get a flu shot. Sleep. Wash your hands. All right. No flu on three. Everybody, hands in. No flu all right. We did it. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats why you should take the stairs, i guess. We have a good show for you tonight. Comedian todd glass is with us. From succession, bryan cox is with us. We will beight back with Academy Award nominee Charlize Theron so stick around shishito. Burrito. Raw kitfo. Fried shiso. French fry. Iced chai. Tasty. Pad thai. Baked pie. Half stack. Taco pack. Lobster mac. Baby back. Pork chop. 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Feels so good feels so good target run and done. Jimmy welcome back. Tonight on the show, he won the golden globe, he is on the hbo show succession, brian here. Later on the show were going to have a game of boar on the floor. If you watch the show you know how horrifying that is. Then you can see him in his hometown of philadelphia at the helium comedy club, tomorrow through sunday, todd glass. From Jimmy Kimmels comedy club in las vegas. Tomorrow night, two oscar nominees. Al pacino and Florence Pugh will be with us. And well have music from nicky jam featuring daddy yankee. Our first guest won her first oscar for playing a serial killer. And next month, she may win a second for playing an employee of fox news. Shes a nominee for best actress for the movie bombshell. Please say hello to Charlize Theron. [ cheers and applause ] wow. Hello. Jimmy hello to you, how are you, hows life . Life is good. Jimmy good, good. Yeah. Jimmy youre nominated for how long ago was it you won an oscar for monster . 16 years ago. Jimmy wow. I dont think we had iphones back then, no, that was a long time ago. Jimmy you didnt have children back then. I did not have children. Heres the difference. When i got my nomination for that one, they do it really early, like 5 00. I was still sleeping until like 10 30. Jimmy really. Yeah, yeah. I remember those days when you could still sleep till 10 30. Jimmy vaguely, vaguely. Not anymore. Now this nomination i was i was dealing with two sets of pee sheets, you know . Jimmy you wet the bed . Im diaper training my 4yearold, trying to get her out of her night diapers. Jimmy oh, boy, yeah. It was a rough night, yeah. Jimmy we had a rough night last night, very similar circumstances going on, except worse. Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Jimmy you know what im saying. Yeah, yeah, i get it. Oh, no, ive never had to deal with that. Jimmy you never have, really . Wow. Well. I mean, its a disgusting topic, im sorry to even bring it up. No, its very real. Jimmy do the kids know youre nominated about these awards . Yes. Jimmy yes. You know, its been a thrilling couple of weeks. I was nominated for a golden globe. Jimmy right. I was nominated for a critics choice. Yes, yes. [ cheers and applause ] really amazing. Jimmy like is it okay to be enthusiastic . Yes, yes. Please be. Because my children arent. Jimmy they arent, okay. So please. Spoiler alert, i didnt win. Jimmy right, yes, yes. Did you tell them that . You guys sound like them. That was kind of the reaction, yeah. They were it was a mixture of super sad and also kind of angry. Jimmy really . Like you didnt win . Like kind of like yeah, they were upset. The little one was like, i really want you to win like angry. And the other, my 8yearold, was just like, just pure disappointment, you know . And so when the Oscar Nominations came in it was like, you know, the third time that they were like, now theyre suspicious. Theyre just like will you win this time . Theres a good shot im probably not going to win. And my oldest just went, well, this sounds like a waste of time. [ laughter ] jimmy have you figured out like your plan for the oscars . Who you will bring . Will you bring a date to the oscars . Yes, im taking i usually take my mom. Its usually a mom daughter night. Jimmy gotcha. Shes fun. Jimmy are you still watching the bachelor . Yes. Jimmy you are. Do you like this season so far . Yes, its really good, dont you think its good . Jimmy well, you know. None of them are really good. [ laughter ] wait. Explain that to me. How can you say such a thing . Jimmy well, because its a huge waste of time. [ laughter ] its similar to what your kids were saying. Got it. Jimmy i sometimes look at all the hours that ive logged watching the show. Yes, yes. Jimmy and i think about the languages i could have learned to speak. Lets be honest. That was never going to happen anyway. Jimmy you know, thats true. So you might as well have something that you enjoy. Jimmy right. It was be honest. Jimmy i like to think of it just to punish myself for watching the show. Oh, its so good. Jimmy maybe even worse of all, rarely is there a relationship at the end. Yet we continue. We continue to buy into it. Yes. Jimmy its like, if like on jeopardy nobody ever won any money. You really sound like jackson mars erin, my 8yearold, yeah, yeah. Jimmy thats what people say to me a lot. A waste of time. It is true, none of those relationships theres some of them, they have kids now and stuff, so some of them. I didnt watch those. Not as relidge husbandly as i watch the train wrecks. Jimmy really, did some of them i think one couple. No, theres a few. Jimmy the first one, trista and ryan. One of them might be from like paradise. Jimmy oh, that doesnt counseled. The bachelor in paradise. Come on, they got married and have a kid, thats huge accomplishment. Jimmy might as well put a camera in a motel at spring break. True. True. Jimmy then celebrate and your problem is what . Jimmy you really like it, though. I do, i really like it, yeah. Jimmy what is it you love about the show . Well, i love the unpredictability. Jimmy uhhuh. I love that jimmy what . The unpredictability . My wife literally picks the winner the first episode. No. Jimmy every single year. Listen, even if i had that skill, and i dont, it kind of ruins the show, though, dont you think . You want to kind of you almost have to give yourself a small lobotomy so you dont pick it, then you can enjoy it. If you pick it its kind of done, right . Jimmy you dont know for sure youre going to be right, youre okay, maybe ill be right, maybe i wont be right, thats part of the fun. Listen, right now theyre all winners in my book, they all have a shot, they all have a shot. Jimmy whats the worst date you ever went on . Oh god. Jimmy without getting too disgusting or terrible. So i went on a date in my 20s with this guy who was really super handsome. I was really into it. He picked me up for dinner. It was lovely. I was like, this is going really wall. And he drove me home. And, you know, i kind of signaled that i was in for a kiss. Like if he wanted you know, you do that thing where its like, yeah. Jimmy so ive heard, yeah. [ laughter ] this might explain your problem with the bachelor. Anyway. Jimmy might explain a lot of my problems, yeah. I get it, i get it. He pulled over by my house. And we started kissing. And it was really good. And then he pulled away and whispered, make out with my nose. Jimmy make out with my nose . [ laughter ] and and he wasnt this wasnt a joke . [ applause ] make out with my nose . [ laughter ] what . [ cheers and applause ] i swear on my life. I ive never forgotten it. Because im still ive yet to meet another person who likes to have somebody make out with their nose. Ive never met another person. Jimmy well, there arent any other people besides him. So he wasnt kidding . No, he was really into it. And i started like giggling. And then because he was like it was good. So i didnt want to mess it up. So i give him a little peck on the nose. No, make out with it. Jimmy wow. Wow. The bachelorette gets a rose, you got a nose. [ cheers and applause ] oh my gosh. Jimmy were going to take a break on that hilarious note. Charlize theron is here with us. The movie is bombshell. Im your 70lb st. Bernard puppy, and my lack of impulse control, is about to become your problem. Ahh no, come on. I saw you eating poop earlier. Hey my focus is on the road, and thats saving me cash with drivewise. Whos the dummy now . Whoof whoof so get allstate where good drivers save 40 for avoiding mayhem, like me. Sorry hes a baby ben, schools across the country have had to cut their sports programs and im on a mission to help fix it count me in youreeee grrreat that never gets old buy a box to help keep sports in schools im an offensive assistant coach for the San Francisco 49ers. Im not just here to be the token female, im here to help us win. The surface pro helps me get whats in my head and get it out on to the field. We saw the earthquake grace in bold was offering a grant program. I signed up and i was actually selected it leaves the house in tack. You now know that in the next earthquake your house will be standing and we also got a discount on our earthquake insurance. If there is an earthquake. Our house has a better chance of surviving in. Americas getting sicker. Sick of donald trump, if there is an earthquake. There are one million more uninsured americans every year under trump. And hes repeatedly tried to repeal obamacare. Mike bloomberg will make sure everyone without Health Coverage can get it, and everyone who likes theirs, keep it. While capping fees to lower costs. As mayor, he helped expand coverage to seven hundred thousand more people. And championed womens reproductive health. As president , hell give access to everyone. Im Mike Bloomberg and i approve this message. For powerful relief from cold and flu symptoms without a prescription, try theraflu multisymptom. Theraflu dissolves in seconds, so its ready to work before your first sip, and absorbs quickly to target and attack 8 cold and flu symptoms fast. Try theraflu. Rogers needs you. Your silence is being noticed. Well, the whole point of an investigation is to find the truth, janine. Until that happens, i dont have a lot to say. If this charge sticks, the working assumption will be every woman at fox got down on her knees. Even you. If we sweep this thing under the rug and it happens again . Under title vii, fox will be liable for compensatory and punitive damages. That could be hundreds of millions. Lets worry about the law before we do the pr, okay . Jimmy Charlize Theron in bombshell. Its in theaters now. Let me tell you something. You sound exactly like megyn kel kelly. I didnt know you could impersonate megyn kelly until i saw you. I spoke about this with Margot Robbie, its unbelievable how much you sound like her. Are you regularly good at imitating people in your life . No, no, i dont have that natural ability at all. I mean, like when i do this kind of work, i like to kind of give it a shot, you know. I felt like shes so well known that that would be and shes so distinctive with her sound. I worked with this incredible woman, karla myer, here in los angeles. There should be an oscar category for dialect coaches. Its not an easy thing for me to do, and she got me to kind of understand why megyn sounds the way that she does. Jimmy why does she sound the way she does . Its complicated. It took us a very, very long time to figure it out. For a good six weeks i didnt think it was going to happen. It was pretty but i have this dog who is kind of like my dog husband, you know. Hes always just right next to me. His name is berkeley. And hes a rescue. Hes always where i am, thats where he is. And so he sat with me for hundreds of hours, trying to get this sound right. Jimmy did he get it . [ laughter ] no, he i mean, he jimmy that would be something. I felt bad, but hes committed in this relationship with me. And so six weeks into it i got a little panicked, like i dont think this is going to happen. Then i did this kind of monologue. And i gave it a real shot. And and out of nowhere berkeley, whos just been asleep for six weeks by my feet, went he had this look on his face where he was like, why are you sounding like that . Youre not my mom. Jimmy really . And thats where i was like, oh [ bleep ], i think were there, i think we did it. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy yeah, you can convince the dog. He didnt recognize the voice. Jimmy your costar Margot Robbie is nominated as well. Yeah. Jimmy which is nice. You get to go there together and represent the movie together. Yes. Jimmy that was kind of am i correct in saying that that kind of began the what was now known as the me too movement . Yes. Jimmy that situation at fox news . It really was the first story that kind of catapulted us into this movement that we find ourselves in right now. So when Gretchen Carlson filed this lawsuit against roger ailes for Sexual Harassment, she was really completely alone. Because none of the women really at fox came forward with their stories for a good two weeks. And there was no me too or times up that could really support her. So she really was one of the first women to do Something Like this and then succeed. You know, not only did she succeed with a lawsuit, other women came forward, shared their stories, she also got an apology from fox, roger ailes was let go. Its a huge accomplishment. Jimmy have you spoken to any of those women, any of those characters that were in the film, megyn kelly maybe in particular . I would imagine megyn kelly, as uncomfortable as she was, she must have been so flattered that you were playing her. I think that its hard to kind of relive Something Like this. You know . I think Sexual Harassment is its one of i think the most pervasive, you know, horrible things that can happen to a man or a woman in their workplace. And the idea of kind of having to relive it is a tough one. And we really wanted to be respectful to them, to all of the women who were part of the story. But i do think that they were very gracious in understanding the power of their story, and therefore, you know, they just recently released a clip, megyn kelly did, that she watched the movie with a few of the women, and they kind of talked about the film. And you know, and megyn in her megyn way had a few issues, of course. That was expected. But the one thing that they could all agree on was that the essence of what it felt like to work there and what it felt like to be under that pressure, that constant pressure of being threatened or your job being threatened, to them was something that moved them incredibly. And so that was really validating for us in the film. We wanted to get that part right. Jimmy well, you definitely it seems like you got it right, and also, it is very entertaining to watch as well. Yes. Jimmy its called bombshell. Charlize theron is nominated for an oscar for it. [ cheers and applause ] well be right back with brian cox whistling my moderate to severe i ulcerative colitis. Ing but i realized something was missing. Me. The thought of my symptoms returning was keeping me from being there for the people and things i love most. So, i talked to my doctor and learned humira can help get, and keep, uc under control when other medications havent worked well enough. And it helps people achieve control that lasts so you could experience few or no symptoms. Humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. Serious, sometimes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened; as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. Before treatment, get tested for tb. Tell your doctor if youve been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if youve had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flulike symptoms or sores. 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Every emergenc gives you a potent blend of nutrients so you can emerge your best, with emergenc. Uhh, excuse me, is there a problem here . Youre in a no parking zone. Oh, i. I didnt know. You didnt see the sign . That. That wasnt there when i was here earlier. whimper really . You know, in italy, they let you park anywhere. Have a good day, sir. With geico, the savings keep on going. Just like this sequel. 15 minutes could save you 15 or more on Car Insurance. glass shattering frustrated yell car horn blast yelp you too, have a great day. Five years ago. I had psoriasis everywhere. Head to toe. People were afraid i was contagious. Alright, ill be back in one hour. My skin hurt. I felt gross. Whats up jay . Hows everything . Whats up man . Hope youve been practicing . But then i started cosentyx. And i havent really had to think about it. See me. Cosentyx works fast to give you clear skin that can last. Real people with psoriasis. Look and feel better with cosentyx. Dont use if youre allergic to cosentyx. Before starting, get checked. For tuberculosis. An increased risk of infections. And lowered ability to fight them may occur. Tell your doctor about an infection. Or symptoms. If your inflammatory bowel disease symptoms develop. Or worsen, or if youve had a vaccine. Or plan to. Serious allergic reactions. May occur. I just look and feel better. See me. Ask your dermatologist if cosentyx could help you move past the pain of psoriasis. Jimmy todd glass is on the way. Our next guest is a terrific actor golden globe for his portrayal of the worst dad since darth vader on the tv series succession, you can see seasons one and two on hbo. Please say hello to brian cox. [ cheers and applause ] thanks for coming. Im already intimidated, i have to say. I watch the show. Youre very scary on it. Yeah. It brings out my natural sadist. Jimmy yeah, yeah. Thats so i can give vent to all the things i feel during the day. I can do it in my work as well. Jimmy that is nice, that is nice to have that outlet, isnt it. A great release to be able to tell people to [ bleep ] off is really [ cheers and applause ] jimmy its a wonderful thing. Its a great asset. Jimmy congratulations on the golden globe, your first golden globe. Thank you. Thank you. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy unlike charlize did you go in thinking that you would win . Its a weird feeling. Its not a comfortable feeling. You know. So i wasnt sure one way or the other. And then you sit there, and then you they announce it. And everything goes through your head like, i dont want it, i dont want it, i dont want it, yes i do, yes i do, i shouldnt have it, i shouldnt have it, yes i do, yes i do, its a crazy dialogue which does your head in. Jimmy on the show you play a guy whos kind of based on a Rupert Murdoch type. And you go back to your character goes back to be honored in the characters hometown of scotland. I didnt realize it, your actual hometown. The story behind that is interesting. What happened was that when i started playing it, when it was suggested to me, i suggested i could play it scots. Jesse armstrong was against it. Adam mckay was for it. They decided, no, hes got to be american. Okay, its american. Ive played more americans than anything. Yeah, okay. So we did it. Then in the first episode, born in quebec, canada. So thats fine, quebec, canada. Vermont, yeah, okay. So i went through nine episodes. On the ninth episode, peter friedman, who plays frank, who i keep firing and rehiring, he comes up to me, you know theyve changed your birthplace. And i said, what do you mean theyve changed my birthplace . He said, yeah, youre no longer born in quebec, canada. I said, where am i born . He said, hang on. He took out his device. Here we are, dundee, scotland. And i said, but thats where i was born. Whats going on . [ applause ] jimmy it had to have been coincidence. I went up to brilliant jesse armstrong. Jimmy creator of the show. Fantastic. And i said, what, what, what . He said, we thought it would be a little surprise. I said, a surprise . Youve just done my head in for nine episodes. Jimmy so then you go there to shoot. I go there to shoot. Jimmy is that to go home, to have a homecoming like that, is that an overwhelming experience . Yeah. I have a very elderly sister who lives there. I do go home to dundee quite a lot. In this in these circumstances it was the most odd thing. Because i was playing a man who was going back to his hometown who didnt want to have anything to do with his hometown. And clearly hated it and clearly was unhappy. And i had to and me in life, i was perfectly happy with my hometown. Jimmy right. So it was a bit of a stretch. Jimmy it was almost like you had to act there. I had to act. Jimmy this is unfair. I had to earn my wages. Jimmy its an imposition. I didnt expect that. Jimmy did you have old friends show up on set . No, no, no, no, no. Jimmy anybody ask you for money . No, no. My friends when they find out im in town tend to disappear. Jimmy they do . So what a great quality. Yeah, i know. I envy it. I mean, other people envy it in me, that i can actually turn up somewhere and everybody goes. Jimmy where do you live now . I live in brooklyn. Jimmy wow, how long have you been there . Ive been there now 11 years. Jimmy do you find now because of the big popularity of this show that brooklyn nights are approaching you everywhere . If i could find brooklyn its id be happy. I live in that area of metro tech, which is great. The genuine brooklynites i think have been pushed out somewhat. I like brooklyn. Jimmy whats your favorite thing about living in brooklyn . Going down to the pier and walking along the front and going down to dumbo. I just love that whole area of the water around there, thats great. Jimmy yeah, yeah. Boy, i never would have guessed you lived in brooklyn, no, i never would have guessed either. Jimmy and do you know now, are you aware of what will happen in season three of the show . No. Thing is, jimmy, we dont know, we never know. When i started the show, i kind of wanted to be prepared, i wanted to know what im doing next. Doesnt happen. Theyve done the bible, they know the book, theyve done all the writing on it. And its always, you get the writing just in time to learn it. And thats and then you, oh oh, this oh, oh oh, whoa its like that. All this is happening. Jimmy any chance they will change your birthplace again . [ laughter ] no. Jimmy they will not. I hope not, i really hope not. No, i hope not. I mean, that was that was difficult. Jimmy well, the show is so good. I mean, its really thank you, thank you. Jimmy i can imagine that when you signed up for this, you didnt know what a sensation it would become. No, ive been doing this game for quite a few weeks. And i just thought you know, to myself i just thought, this doesnt come along hasnt come along too often in my career. And i could smell it. You can smell something. I could smell the script. I could smell the whole situation. Adam mckay, jesse. I just thought, oh, here, this is it. This is something. And it has turned out to be. Jimmy i want you to know, i mean this as the highest possible compliment, you are a real son of a bitch on that show. [ cheers and applause ] really. Years of practice. Jimmy well, brian cox, everybody. Watch seasons one and two of succession on hbo. When we return, we go all the way to las vegas for a comedian, todd glass. [ cheers and applause ] iclimate is the number 1ove priority. Sage. I would declare a state of emergency on day 1. Congress has never passed an important climate bill, ever. This is a problem that continues to get worse. Ive spent a decade fighting and beating oil companies. Stopping pipelines. Stopping fossil fuel plants, ensuring clean energy across the country. How are we going to pull this country together . We take on the biggest challenge in history, we save the world and do it together. Jimmy i want to thank Charlize Theron and brian cox, apologies to matt damon. We did run out of time for him. Nightline is next, but first, you can see this man january 25th in new york at the murmrrmu theater, on january 25th, and in pittsburgh at the Arcade Comedy Theater january 30th to february 1st. Please welcome comedys National Treasure todd glass. Shut up. There you go. No big deal. I know this is a little gross. Do you mind if i just blow my nose for one second . I got you good, ha, youre so stupid, you fell for it look at all the people in the audience at home, in the jimmy kimmel audience oh, i thought that was a real blow i knew it was fake, im not stupid. Youre so mad sitting in your house, like oh look at this audience they cant laugh at themselves anymore, thats the problem with america. All right, guys. Dont worry, i dont do mean crowd work. People are afraid to sit up front at comedy clubs. I get it, theyre nervous. Watch this. I like your shirt. Thats funny, sure. Ladies and gentlemen, if i could have your attention for one second. Can i get some reverb . I want to talk to anybody in the audience thats a city planner. If youre in this crowd today and youre a city planner, or the audience at home. Remember, theres one person watching thats a city planner, so enjoy this. You, and you. But if youre a city planner, and in your city one street turns into another street, elm street turns into fort, you shouldnt be a city planner answer that question. That will confuse people. Oh, theres two elm streets, and youre a city planner, you shouldnt be a city planner enough, dont make a big deal about it. Thank you. I want to talk give me a little something. I want to talk to some guys in the audience, and im being very serious, that have a long dirty toenail. You know who you are. There might be some guys going, oh my god, i have a long dirty toenail. Its probably not you. Im talking you know. Its disgusting and dirty. Im going to tell you something and i mean it. I mean it. Im not just being vicious. If you have a long dirty toenail, you also have a dirty ass. Yes. With some proof. What are the odds . Could it be true . Yes. What are the odds that what everybody sees. Every day you keep that vile and disgusting, but what nobody might ever see, your ass, that youre scrubbing with soap . All right, bring it down. By the way, the later youre up, no segues. The later youre up, the more ads think youre tired. Are you tired of oldfashioned irons . Nobody cares. Whos tired of are you tired of oldfashioned irons melting all your suits and ties . That doesnt even happen. Oh, my suits and ties are one big puddle of suits and ties guys, what happened to the new suits i got you . They melted i got you four new suits each. They melted, idiot every suit you have melted. Yes how the hell did they melt . What about the bowties . They melted every bowtie melted . Yes how the hell did they melt . We ironed the oldfashioned way maybe its true. I want to talk to you about this. I want to leave you with this, ladies and gentlemen. Id like to do an improv song, hit everybody in the audience. Were going to go and go and go, get everybody in the audience. These are not planned people in the audience. But ill come up with a little somebody on everybody, go around the room, hit everybody in the audience, never stop. What is your name . Tyler . Favorite color . Blue . Here we go. Hit me up with something, john. Wow. I love the sound of the piano. My names Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler Tyler tyler tyler i like blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue blue youve got shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt youre right there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there look at you la la la la jimmy all right, i think we got it. Todd glass, everybody. Comedys National Treasure lighting up the vegas strip. Thats our show. Thank you for watching, good night this is nightline. Tonight, medical pains. Staggering bills adding insult to injury. I was like, wait a minute. Did you just say that i owe 71,000 . Facing financial ruin from one accident, and hes a doctor. Millions of americans at risk. Now overdue help for outofcontrol bills. Plus putting the wow in bow wow. Inside the world of creative competitive dog grooming. Turning heads and tails. Pooches pampered and puffed while groomers fight rumors. Some people think we tranquilize her to lay on the table so calmly like
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