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A mostly bush-league effort from Blumhouse (which knows a thing or two about making uninspired "horror" flicks) keeps the long-held tradition of treating Stephen King properties like one of those junky paperbacks you buy in desperation before boarding a four-hour flight to somewhere you don't care about. Keith Thomas' updated adaptation of "Firestarter" -- the original version, released in 1984, came out so long ago, current daytime TV host Drew Barrymore starred in it as a 9-year-old -- plays like a failed pilot to a woebegone series bid on the SyFy Channel.

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