Of parents across the country will children sadly of parents across the country will children not sadly of parents across the country will children not goingadly of parents across the country wilableiildren not goingadly of parents across the country wilable tolren not goingadly of parents across the country wilable tolren to ot goingadly of parents across the country wi will; tolren to ot goingadly of parents across the country wi will; tolren into goingadly or will be moved into portacabins or alternative accommodation because of the risk crumbling risk that this kind of crumbling concrete is going to pose. All feels last it all feels very last minute. Calling minute. And what were calling on the government to do is to pubush publish a full list of all of the schools affected so that parents can be confident about where the problems are. And if theyre where the problems are. And if thewill a vote in we will force a vote in Parliament Week make it happen. The home office has recorded the highest daily number of small boat crossings in the channel 872 channel so far this year, 872 migrants made the journey yesterday on 15 dinghies. At least another two small boats were bringing least another two small boats were number bringing least another two small boats were number peopleiging the total number of people entering illegally entering the country illegally past is past 21,000 this year. That is still significant, than still significant, lower than this time last year, though, when had the when 25,000 people had made the journey are to be journey. Tesco staff are to be offered bodycams after a significant violent significant rise in Violent Attacks executive attacks. Chief executive ken murphy forced to murphy says hes been forced to increase security measures after physical assaults rose by a third since last year. Writing in the mail on sunday, hes called for tougher laws to make abuse or violence towards retail workers a criminal offence resulting in longer sentences. Resulting in longer sentences. In spain, torrential rain and storms have caused major flooding across parts of the country. Weather warnings are in country. Weather warnings are in place in the madrid, cardiff and toledo regions, with residents in the capital being to told stay at home. In tarragona in the north east of the country, 215l m2 of rain has fallen in the last 24 hours. One person has died as a result of heavy rain at the burning man festival in the United States. Tens of thousands of people have been stranded at the event in nevada after the bad weather turned the ground into a mudbath. Roads in and out of the festival have been closed, with revellers asked to conserve food and water. This is gb news. Now it isfime water. This is gb news. Now it is time for headliners as. Hello and welcome to headliners. Im josh howie and joining me to dredge through mondays newspapers for the best stories are two opposites from the comedy circuit. The comedy circuit. Knowledgeable, insightful and sane. Steve and alan and Lewis Schaffer. Schaffer. Fair point. Fair point. Well, see what did the how are you guys doing . What did there with the facial expression . 7 oh, no. oh, no. It was very it was very good. It was very it was very good. It was very it was very good. I knew you were to going say that. Did you. Okay. Sorry. That did you. Okay. Sorry. Is that because are you both doing . Before . How are you both doing . Youre both looking very smart. Well make an effort. You know, i know, youre wearing a tie. I thought step thought wed better step. Were all going tied up. Were all going tied up. Thats i dont think thats about how british call it. Looking how the british call it. Looking smart. Okay its smart. Means looking intelligent. Yeah exactly. Thats what we. Thats all it takes in this country as a tie is wear a tie in america. Youre is wear a tie in america. Youre like genius, right . Is wear a tie in america. Youre like gwearing ght . Same tie then im wearing the same tie then mark was before. Mark dolan was wearing before. But its but its not his tie. Its a different okay well, okay, then. The straight away right. The straight away right. Okay. We are going to zip through the front pages. First of all, the times hundreds of schools still in dark over safety fears. The Daily Mail Councils allow staff to work from the beach. The Guardian School crisis. No extra cash for repairs, says treasury the mirror. My promise to workers. Mirror. My promise to workers. Financial times. Russias banks propped up by chinese cash after sanctions and the star trick or heat. Those are your front pages. Lets have a closer look. Lets have a closer look. First of all, we are going to go with the times. With the times. Steve front page of the times tells us, i mean, well, theres the headline, migrant crossings approach 900 a day. I dont know if that page linked it, if that page is linked to it, but probably if that page is linked to it, but this probably if that page is linked to it, but this from probably if that page is linked to it, but this from on probably if that page is linked to it, but this from on his probably if that page is linked to it, but this from on his own. Ably if that page is linked to it, but this from on his own. But did this from on his own. But hes hundreds did this from on his own. But he schools hundreds did this from on his own. But he schools still hundreds did this from on his own. But he schools still in hundreds did this from on his own. But he schools still in dark hundreds did this from on his own. But he schools still in dark over dreds of schools still in dark over safety fears. This is about the safety fears. This is about the crumbling , this bubbly concrete. Crumbling, this bubbly concrete. I was reading somewhere onune i was reading somewhere online today saying that some of it can be up to 70 higher. Thats not bubbly concrete. Thats not bubbly concrete. Slightly concrete air thats slightly concrete air at stage. At that stage. Its a worry. And its a worry. And its a worry. You dont know if your school might the something might have the risk of something just collapsing. Its reached its end of its lifespan. Yesterday were lifespan. Yesterday we were chatting who knew what when. So i bothered to research it today. So in the 60s they was using and 60s. Today. So in the 60s they was usi|in and 60s. Today. So in the 60s they was usi|in the and 60s. Today. So in the 60s they was usi|in the epeople. Today. So in the 60s they was usi|in the {people had in the 60s, people had concerns whether should in the 60s, people had corused; whether should in the 60s, people had corused in whether should in the 60s, people had corused in the whether should in the 60s, people had corused in the 1980s. Ar should in the 60s, people had corused in the 1980s. Theyhould in the 60s, people had corused in the 1980s. They firstd be used in the 1980s. They first found out that there were some structural issues, same thing happened early happened in the 90s early 2000. They report into it where they did a report into it where they actually along and they actually went along and analysed heres analysed it went, yep, heres your problems. 2019 your structural problems. 2019 a school or School Collapse in gravesend or a bit of it does to 2021. They sent around these questionnaires to schools to say what lets have a look to find out if youve got thing needs youve got this thing that needs sorting out. Days before youve got this thing that needs sort schools days before youve got this thing that needs sort schools meant 3efore youve got this thing that needs sort schools meant to ore youve got this thing that needs sort schools meant to open, the schools were meant to open, something you something happened. So you definitely could have done something earlier. All of those opportunities. Opportunities. We thank you very much, steve, for that History Lesson we thank you very much, st we thank you very much, st we thank you very much, st we thank you very much, st i mean, josh , i mean, this is i mean, josh, i mean, this is this is the weirdest show. I feel like its sunday. I feel like what . Know, feels like what . You know, this feels like what . You know, this feels like a sunday. It feels like a sunday to me. Anyway, the point is, are you blaming, steve . Is, who are you blaming, steve . Who are you blaming that they that they this announcement that they made this announcement three school. So three days before the school. So the government made the announcement. But where was announcement. But where was somebody demanding that an somebody else demanding that an announcement be made three years ago when the School Collapsed or 20 years ago when they first realised the governments job to do that . Soon this as soon as they this questionnaire sent questionnaire that they sent around, pull your finger out, get sooner around, pull your finger out, get thinking sooner around, pull your finger out, get thinking, sooner around, pull your finger out, get thinking , oh sooner around, pull your finger out, get thinking , oh well, sooner around, pull your finger out, get thinking , oh well, all1er around, pull your finger out, get thinking , oh well, all of a than thinking, oh well, all of a sudden the schools are about to be of them be open. Lets shut some of them down and down until we go along and reinforce this reinforced sort of claim. This is reinforce this no, this is reinforce this is democracy. Me and an open democracy. Me and an open society. And when you have an society. And when you have an open society , you expect open society, you expect Political Parties and organisations to make a stink about stuff before the day. You basically blaming the opposition for not doing not holding the tories to account, not the tories to account, not the tories for just not tories to account, not the tories forjust not doing their tories for just not doing their job, for not not holding the job, for not for not holding the government not state government, not the state to account for this. Yes. I mean theyre holding them to account now. Commons opening tomorrow commons is opening and labour going have and labour are going to have a field surely and labour are going to have a field where surely and labour are going to have a field where this . Ly and labour are going to have a field where this . These but where was this . These buildings have been around for 100 this method. 100 years using this method. Yeah. No, since the 60s in this country. It was from the country. But it was from the they in the 1920s and they started in the 1920s and sweet. A Little Research sweet. I did a Little Research too, in the 1920s, both of you caring about jobs in sweden caring about your jobs in sweden , in sweden and i knew that autoclaving means a man who was heatis autoclaving means a man who was heat is good for this whole Building System really good Building System is really good for. And because for the environment. And because concrete is of the biggest concrete is one of the biggest producers , from what i producers of co2, from what i know, believe the know, not that i believe the co2 causes climate change, but lot causes climate change, but a lot of. Sorry, i dont of people. Sorry, i dont believe you believe im surprised you believe im surprised you believe exists. You know believe in co2 exists. You know what . Ive never it. What . Ive never seen it. Theres no direct evidence. Theres no direct evidence. You dont have a lived experience , do you, with c02 . Experience, do you, with c02 . I well, no, ive been told its the one gas you can detect i its what youre talking about. Yeah literally what youre saying right now is co2. Right now is co2. You know, i guess i detect an absence of oxygen. I dont know. Thing. You dont. Thats the thing. You dont. The detect an the human body doesnt detect an absence know what absence of oxygen. You know what the what . The people you know what . Out there weve got people out there hate they hate your hate you, steve. They hate your intelligence. They hate your wise guy attitude. They like me wise guy attitude. They like me because im man of the people. Yes, i come a better yes, i come from a better country. Country than them. Weve slightly knocked weve been slightly knocked off at the off target, straight at the first with the first story. Lets go with the guardian. Come on, lewis. Keep us. Us on target. Its same story well, its the same story that house of. Theres that the house of. Theres no extra repairs, say the extra cash for repairs, say the treasury. You know, its treasury. Because you know, its like. Its like what they say about about spending money, you know, 1 billion here. 1 billion there. After a while, youre talking about real money. Theres so much things that are collapsing. The whole country is collapsing. The whole country is collapsing. Nothing personal. Its still a fantastic country, but they dont have the money to make the repairs for these schools. Well, schools. So its like, well, whats going to happen . Well, it is. Well, it is. Its the its not i mean, its the its not its misnomer here. Its a slight misnomer here. Theyre money theyre taking the money from budgets that have already allocated. Yeah its not steve right. Yeah its not the and the the repairs and the reinforcement. So if a school identifies that its got this, you then have to not use it for a few days while someone goes in and it. Its knocking and reinforces it. Its knocking the down even the can down the road even further. The cost will further. So the cost will continue up. The continue to build up. But the problem i think the problem i think is about the fact its a great way to fact that its a great way to build. Yeah build. You said, right . Yeah its a cheap build. Its a cheap way to build. And by it cheap, the short by doing it cheap, the short term a building term ism, lets have a building that for years. Lets that lasts for 30 years. Lets have doesnt have a building that doesnt last show last as long as the tv show eastenders. Yeah. And then of eastenders. Yeah. And then of course have course youre going have problems further down the road and what doing and thats what were doing now. The money is going to. Yeah, it might be extra new money. So might not be extra new money. So it elsewhere in it comes from elsewhere in the budget. Everything budget. That means everything suffers because couldnt suffers because we couldnt build. Build properly. A cases actually a lot of cases its actually cheaper have built a new cheaper to just have built a new building place. But building in the first place. But for the issue the for me, the issue is that the budget the emergency budget for the emergency measures say theyre saying that has to be taken from the schools budgets themselves. Thats a problem because if the school doesnt the budget, its doesnt have the budget, its back calls and back to the zoom calls and whatever. And thats where i have a massive issue. If any child one hour in the child loses one hour in the flesh. Flesh. But theyre going to theyre to going and i think theres two theres two stories behind the stories , which is one, its just stories, which is one, its just one more excuse for the state to build because the building is the most is the biggest industry of this world. Having the Chinese People build all those apartment houses , its just an apartment houses, its just an excuse tearing down excuse for like tearing down these schools building some these schools and building some more. So its going its more. So its going to make its going hopefully going to make the hopefully these ten years these ones the last ten years happy. Right. Happy. Right, right. They mirror whats what are they going steve my promise to going with steve my promise to workers this is keir starmer so for previously on this show everyones saying keir starmer is anything. Is not saying anything. Not putting his colours hes not putting his colours anywhere. And anywhere near a mast. And finally, of finally, weve got a bit of a promise and the hilarious thing about this is hes just sounding like the conservative party would normally and sound. I would normally try and sound. I wont tax wont be raising your income tax. Im the guy of low tax. I wont be hammering you like that other party, the tories. What a flipped upside down world we seem in where his seem to be living in where his promises about the promises are all about the economy. Because ordinarily thats the area theyre weak. If you want to attack labour, you bnng you want to attack labour, you bring record about bring up some track record about economy. Conservatives have economy. The conservatives have managed to a situation managed to create a situation where keir starmer can look like the guy whos going to be good with money. With the money. And but i mean, yeah, i mean, and but i mean, its incredible its an incredible transformation though. I mean, louis, people louis, a few years ago, people just assuming that he was just going to interim going to be this interim opposition leader, now opposition leader, but now the fact that hes turned things around and detoxified around so quickly and detoxified the kind the labour party, its kind of amazing, though. Hanging out well, hes been hanging out with blair and i think what with tony blair and i think what this is, is this guy starmer, these guys have been out of power for so long they want power for so long and they want to win. Its very similar to when blair came into power when tony blair came into power and anything. He they and hell say anything. He they want so badly that want to win so badly that theyre willing to stop being theyre willing to stop being the labour party. And thats the same thats what thats what killed the tories. The tories. Killed the tories. The tories. This is think. Im not this is what i think. Im not sure about that. Right. But i think tories, stop think the tories, they stop being lately and. No, no, being tories lately and. No, no, i mean, arguably for 13 years theyve still managed to mess up theyve still managed to mess up the country by. Well, can the country by. Well, you can mess the country from the mess up the country from the left right. Thats left and from the right. Thats very these are very true. So these people are maybe people be more maybe these people will be more tory the tories. And all we tory than the tories. And all we can hope is that they mess up the country less. Thats what were for. Going thats what were for. Going were different way. Were in a different way. Were in a different way. Spread it around bit. Ill spread it around a bit. Ill tell the worst thing tell you what the worst thing the when tell you what the worst thing the were when tell you what the worst thing the were opposition. Nhen tell you what the worst thing the were opposition. They they were in opposition. They never this concrete never mentioned this concrete stuff because apparently you blame this. Blame the opposition for this. Thats what thats thats what you do. Thats what i hear the word on the street. Anyway yeah. Finally, were going quickly were just going to very quickly go and go with the daily mail and louis. Theyre basically you can just work from the beach, cant you . Not . You . Well, why not . Letting people you . Well, why not . From letting people you . Well, why not . From home, ng people you . Well, why not . From home, whatsple you . Well, why not . From home, whats the work from home, whats the difference where take difference where they take the computer know computer from . They dont know what the person is doing at home. People are home. As long as people are paying home. As long as people are paying to what paying attention to what to what theyre its were theyre doing, if its were leading to someday, there wont be any like Council Workers who are living the council, maybe even the garbage people will Work Overseas or something. Work from overseas or something. Because we because weve got ai and weve got computer and internet and telephones. And so they should basically be on the beach and their job whilst beach and enjoy their job whilst they it. Theyre they still have it. If theyre doing work, fine. Doing the work, fine. Okay. You what do i mean, what do you what do you steve . Does it you think, steve . Is it does it matter . Not matter . I mean, were not talking front talking about its on the front page, but were talking about 1000 people over the last couple of something. Of years or something. In yeah, its a change in the way because way that were working because the there. It the technology is there. It feels some feels like, yeah, theres some flaws with it, but youre a bit of a luddite you it of a luddite if you think it should never happen. Im should never happen. Im obviously biased. Do obviously im biased. I do a radio these radio show from the shed these days, the idea of days, so i love the idea of working home. Are working from home. There are some the perks would working from home. There are sorone the perks would working from home. There are sorone the the perks would working from home. There are sorone the ways1e perks would working from home. There are sorone the ways that rks would working from home. There are sorone the ways that rks iget. D be one of the ways that you get someone be one of the ways that you get somcana be one of the ways that you get somcan pay them less because you can pay them less because you can pay them less because you give all this freedom you can pay them less because yo work. All this freedom you can pay them less because yo work. Skegness reedom you can pay them less because yo work. Skegness beach] you can pay them less because yo work. Skegness beach or to work. From skegness beach or whichever beach is. Thats just is. Thats just outsource is. These thats just outsource is. These jobs ats just outsource is. These jobs at marbella ;ource all these jobs to marbella beach. Thats doing. Beach. Thats what im doing. Ill. Thats it for ill move that. Thats it for part coming we part one. But coming up, we have immigration, mosques and mosques. Why mess with a winning formula . See you election, but for some reason. Everybody had convinced themselves that labour was was going to win neil kinnock was going to win neil kinnock was going Prime Minister. Going to win neil kinnock was goiiyoure Prime Minister. Going to win neil kinnock was goiiyoure listeningviinister. Going to win neil kinnock was goiiyoure listeningviiniste news youre listening to gb news radio. Radio. Welcome back to headliners. Im josh howie joined by science symbol steve and alan and sex symbol steve and alan and sex symbol louis schaffer. Oh, thats better there go. Thats better there we go. Right, lets go first to mondays steve mondays independence steve where up to the old where labour up to the old tncks where labour up to the old tricks again trying to win an election but how dare they. Revives attack ads labour revives attack ads claiming scandal shows claiming concrete scandal shows rishi sunak does not want schools to be so you know schools to be safe. So you know the format that little graphic that they had, you can just swap the on it these its the text on it these days. Its really they really easy isnt it . They brought out another about brought out another one about this trying instead of theyre trying to do instead of blaming government not blaming the government for not getting , theyre getting it sorted, theyre trying to blame rishi sunak because when he chancellor, because when he was chancellor, there funding that there was a cut of funding that would but still would have helped it, but still two things. It never seems to play two things. It never seems to play for labour when they play well for labour when they play play well for labour when they play like their fan play dirty. Its like their fan base this type of base doesnt want this type of politics, but also in the actual thing it says. Do think your thing it says. Do you think your Childs School should be safe before answering . Rishi sunak doesnt. Yeah, there we go. Weve yeah, well there we go. Weve got there. Got the image there. Mean, thats not right i mean, thats not the right interpretation. Best Case Scenario to save scenario is he wanted to save money. He wouldnt sitting scenario is he wanted to save mone going, ouldnt sitting scenario is he wanted to save mone going, no,jnt sitting scenario is he wanted to save mone going, no, ilt sitting scenario is he wanted to save mone going, no, i dont sitting scenario is he wanted to save mone going, no, i dont wantg there going, no, i dont want them saying i them to them to be saying i want them to all learn all just suffer. Just learn about a class two lever when you have to pry some concrete off timmys not where timmys legs, thats not where hes cheap at the worst. The worst say worst thing you could say is cheap. He cheap. Its not that he hates kids. Kids. Well, yeah. Speaking well, yeah. I mean, speaking of kids, louis, what do of hating kids, louis, what do you what do you make of this . I mean, do these kind of ads backfire . Work . Backfire . Do they work . Well, dont dont well, i dont know. I dont really understand british well, i dont know. I dont really lthatstand british well, i dont know. I dont really [that strongly british well, i dont know. I dont really [that strongly. British well, i dont know. I dont really [that strongly. Butish well, i dont know. I dont really [that strongly. But ih people that strongly. But i think rishi sunak actually strikes me as kind likeable strikes me as kind of a likeable guy for a really rich guy. I mean, he should be totally hateable, but you kind of feel sorry for him because hes kind of hes got hes got a of short and hes got hes got a rich probably rich wife and hes probably under prime under the cosh and being Prime Minister isnt good for minister isnt good enough for him. You feel bad for him. Him. So you feel bad for him. So youve written in the youve just written in the torys rebuttal to this. Come on. Hes a nice guy. I mean, hes sure hes fit. Hes under the thumb. Under the thumb. Hes under the thumb of his wife. Everybody knows his wife is power whatever power is a power. Power whatever power person power. I think i think the thing the thing about the tories is they try to be presented as a mean. Tories have always been the mean party, the nasty party, and so , well, nasty party, and so, well, theyve also been the party in power. I theyve also been the party in power. I dont theyve also been the party in power. I dont want to theyve also been the party in power. I dont want to admit this, but i think i think steve is right. Is right. Well, okay, there we go. Mondays mail next. And id guess if you can guess youd protest if you can get a facial, louis, wouldnt you . I you . I dont want to this i dont want to do this story. Of story. Theres hundreds of furious at furious villagers protest at luxury , which shut down to luxury spa, which shut down to house immigrants, becoming a second Asylum Seeker hotel in the area , stoking fear. What the area, stoking fear. What a headune the area, stoking fear. What a headline this is. I mean, really, what you want to do the story want to story then . I dont want to do the its these the story because a its these people want it. They want it. They dont want to know that theres problem theres an immigrant problem because it really tugs at peoples know our peoples hearts. You know our audience no , audience very well. Louis no, they dont to now they dont want to know it now because so angry. Can because they get so angry. I can just them seething and just see them seething and seething go to seething and they need to go to sleep. I going they sleep. I was going to say they need tomorrow, need to go to work tomorrow, but most of our people are not world workers. They are, are they . Workers. They are, are they . What they say theyre layabouts. You are really insulting you. You are really insulting your viewership. Your viewership. Make friends and influence people. Im in a mood. Im in a really mood today. Theyre really bad mood today. Theyre clipping that clipping clipping one of that clipping coupons, theyre rich who america. Theyre rich people who who. And theyre who have pensions. And theyre the people whove come the people up to me are people whove come up to me are theyre lovely people, but theyre lovely people, but theyre like, they dont. They dont look like theyre working. Anyway, me let me finish the story. Thats also where you live. I want talk about. Yeah, want to talk about. Yeah, okay. The anyway, but yes, finish the story, is, is this the story is, is that this is this happening in wigan and this is happening in wigan and they grade. The they took a grade. The government bought a renting a grade two listed wedding venue called kelly. Kelly court in standish which is near wigan. And i didnt realise there was, there was anything nice near wigan. Oh wow. You are really wigan. Oh wow. You are really just going to alienate. I mean this is interesting because as it says, hundreds of furious protesters and whatever , yet the narrative is that these protesters are somehow racist or some some Media Outlets might try and present it. There was an anti racist counter demonstration there, but the interesting thing is, i think the narrative is slightly changing now is that , you know, changing now is that, you know, there is lisa nandy , a labour there is lisa nandy, a labour mp, shes protesting this. They already have another site close by which is also used to house everyone. Yeah, there and isnt as simple as as that as what people are trying to make out. Right. Well i partially agree that you know theres some nimby ism here, but thats not necessarily wrong. Right if a wrong. It might be right if a local impacted by a such local area is impacted by a such a large number of something. A large number of something. How is it impacted . How is it impacted . , before i even get well, before i even get there, of it matters. There, it none of it matters. Its a free market thing. This is this story totally is what this story totally misses, that its a privately owned hotel , so its allowed to owned hotel, so its allowed to do whatever it wants with its hotel. This is not an issue of hotel. This is not an issue of whether governments think it should happen or not. This is this , i think, Mcdonalds Hotel this, i think, Mcdonalds Hotel is own it. And theyve said, look, weve we dont earn enough money from this spa hotel. Yeah. Money from this spa hotel. Yeah. You turn it and make money you turn it over and make money from. No. From. No. You people from. No. Vou you know people whove had their events cancelled. Theres their events cancelled. Theres the possibility, i believe jobs have out. I mean, for have been lost out. I mean, for me, interesting about it me, whats interesting about it is idea that this immediate is this idea that this immediate idea by, like i say, some people in the media where these people protesting, they must be racist because theyre anti immigrants. Itsjust as as. Its just isnt as simple as that. The interesting thing that. And the interesting thing is come back from is and ive just come back from america in new york and my like lefty friends out in new york, theres a lot protest out theres a lot of protest out there, a lot feeling there, a lot of ill feeling towards the immigration issues that there you see that they have there you see video footage chicago , show video footage in chicago, show of black chicago , chicago of black chicago, chicago nafives of black chicago, chicago natives protesting at these council meetings. And town meetings because their services are also being overtaken by immigrants. So i think this traditional narrative seems to be shifting. Can i just say this . I agree with you, josh , and i think with you, josh, and i think steve is wrong in this case. Were back on track. Were back on track. There we go. Lets get straight he straight off this then before he changes straight off this then before he cha nos straight off this then before he cha no , because because just no, because because can just point that is that point this out. Is that is that the. It isnt the government. It isnt a libertarian issue , right . It libertarian issue, right . It isnt a free market because the government stepped in to basically buy the by the thing. No serco. Serco is acting for the government. Okay. On to the times now have on to the times now and have the tories solve the asylum crisis. Steve of migrant interviews to be cut from 7 hours to 45 minutes to empty asylum hotels. Asylum hotels. Every time weve talked about this issue, ive always said clear giving clear the backlog. Stop giving us distractions, stop pointing at the backlog at a barge, get the backlog sorted, doing it. Sorted, and theyre doing it. And saying, now these and im saying, good. Now these stories are like, oh, surely you cant make a hour cant make a seven hour interview. In 45 minutes. Interview. Do it in 45 minutes. Oh, going to have people oh, were going to have people youve speak really youve just got to speak really fast. Youve just got to speak really fast. Theyll get do fast. Theyll get al to do it. Chatgpt is probably it, chatgpt is probably doing it, but cases where but therell be some cases where its clear a clear no. Its a clear yes or a clear no. Do those quickly you do those quickly and you will whip percentage whip through a big percentage of the the ones that take the cases. The ones that take longer, protracted ones. Longer, the protracted ones. Then fewer people then therell be fewer people left in hotels. This actually then therell be fewer people le step hotels. This actually then therell be fewer people le step in tels. This actually then therell be fewer people le step in tels right actually then therell be fewer people le step in tels right direction. A step in the right direction. Well, its interesting that you said the you say that. And ive said the same thing. Get rid of the backlog. The biggest ever same thing. Get rid of the bacand. The biggest ever same thing. Get rid of the bacand. The; biggest ever same thing. Get rid of the bacand. The stuff|est ever same thing. Get rid of the bacand. The stuff theyve be. And all the stuff theyve hired these extra workers, theyve simpler theyve made the process simpler. Some countries, theyve just doing essentially doing that. But essentially automatically. The automatically. But the interesting thing now is the narrative going to change by narrative is going to change by louis theyre saying narrative is going to change by louis pushing theyre saying narrative is going to change by louis pushing the theyre saying narrative is going to change by louis pushing the problem saying were pushing the problem further down local further down to the local Council Halls because once people asylum and people are granted asylum and theyre here, suddenly the local councils have to deal with it. Councils have to deal with it. Yeah, at the at the end of the , this end of the the day, this is the end of the day they just stop day story. If they just stop people the people from coming into the country, have to country, they wouldnt have to worry we worry about a backlog. So we wouldnt need worry about. Worry about a backlog. So we wouwouldntd worry about. Worry about a backlog. So we wouwouldntd wowelliout. Worry about a backlog. So we wouwouldntd wo well its. You wouldnt worry . Well its like when like amazing. I remember when i appued like amazing. I remember when i applied to live in this country, i for leave remain i applied for leave to remain indefinitely. I didnt even indefinitely. And i didnt even know what that term i know what that term meant. I said to leave to said i dont want to leave to remain. Remain. Remain. I want to remain. To remain. I want to remain. To remain. Leave. Remain. I dont want to leave. I dont remain. I dont want to leave. I dont andi remain. I dont want to leave. I dont and i remember dont want and i remember the guy and the guy in the new yorker and the new asked new york consulate, and he asked me he down sat down me he sat down and sat me down at my interview with at the table. My interview with them 30, 20, ten them took about like 30, 20, ten minutes. And he straight away and he i told him i wanted to go to england to be with my new bride. And he looked at me and he went , why . He went, why . Times have changed. Okay, louis, has the mail story given youideas louis, has the mail story given you ideas about to how get £2 million . You know what . I cant. I cant do these stories anymore. Theyre just so stories anymore. Theyre just so depressing. I mean, in the beginning , depressing. I mean, in the beginning, he was like, im so happy this happy to be on tv now. This is like me mosque like bumming me out. Mosque has decades long history of alleged extremism speech, extremism and hate speech, including imam who gave a including an imam who gave a sermon and had a stone. Women sermon and had a stone. Women correctly a stone, then correctly had a stone, then correctly had a stone, then correctly , they were handed a £2 correctly, they were handed a £2 million grant, an said its a problem. Stoning and women incorrectly. He is a real issue. He is a real issue. Well, its probably its probably against great probably goes against the great books anyway this is the greenland mosque birmingham books anyway this is the greenlanrwere;que birmingham books anyway this is the greenlanrwere once birmingham books anyway this is the greenlanrwere once featured gham books anyway this is the greenlanrwere once featured inam and they were once featured in a documentary about. It how to documentary about. It how to kill the kafir or kafir, whatever it is, which is a derogatory term based on ulez fact , the fact is, is that fact is, the fact is, is that the we cant talk about it. You dont want to talk about it . No, you talk about it. No, you talk about it. Okay. Okay. Well , i okay. Well, i will talk about it. Well, i will talk about it. Me off there. You get me off there. You get me off there. About jihad. The talk about violent jihad. The crazy is this footage crazy thing is that this footage of calling for the correct way to so this was their youtube to so this was on their Youtube Channel like theyre promoting it and then suddenly gets it and then suddenly it gets pulled and the other thing pulled out and the other thing thats interesting, this is a mail to mail article theyre trying to sort theyre sort of it feels like theyre putting now, putting the blame on labour now, £77,000 has already gone to them this further £2 million. And the idea it was to develop youth idea was it was to develop youth centres. Thats a great idea. Thats massive failure , i thats been a massive failure, i believe, government is believe, of this government is not invest our to not to invest in our youth, to give them something. Give them time to do something. But that this sort of but the idea that this sort of £2 million to this is not invest ing in our youth. Its investing in those youth well, in in people who are going to this money, if the ideology is going to be continued , is is going to be continued, is that this is the point. But of course the ideology because thats all religious thats because all religious organisations are promoting the continuation. Continuation. Ive never been to my synagogue. Itsjust ive never been to my synagogue. Its just literally about like making chicken soup and making halal. And youre saying thats not about continuing the stoning techniques are terrible. His techniques are terrible. His synagogue the yeah , its synagogue the yeah, its a mistake. The article does really try and say, oh, at some point someone looking into it was some former labour something this is the department for culture, media and sports and i guess the sports is because hes stoning a category. I dont know. Is this category. I dont know. Is this a Nadine Dorries thing . Look a Nadine Dorries thing . I look through and find the through it, try and find the time happened time when it actually happened because it could be a. Nadine dorries clearly they dorries one. Look clearly they shouldnt if ever shouldnt get the money if ever anyone get hands anyone shouldnt get their hands on materials. Its on construction materials. Its people stoning should people who like stoning should be created concrete. So it would be very light. Very light, yeah. 70 air. Did out the correct did you find out the correct way to stonewall . I didnt watch the the the video, but i read the details. Correct details. No. What is the correct way apparently to way . Apparently youre meant to bury the women to the to the bury the women to the up to the waist. Yeah to protect their decency. See . Decency. See . Well, thats important. Yes. Well, thats important. Yes. Thank you so much. Youre full of facts. You can see more of facts. You can see me more male and steve, does this male now. And steve, does this person wear mask person need to wear a mask to hide fauci admits that there dr. Fauci admits that there is a lack of evidence showing the dreaded covid 19 mask mandate stopped the pandemic , mandate stopped the pandemic, but it says he wants us to cover cover up anyway as cases spike. Cover up anyway as cases spike. And its a bit of a heavy lifting in that part of the sentence. Hes not calling for a mandate. Saying , yeah, you mandate. Hes saying, yeah, you know, wear a mask if you want. Know, wear a mask if you want. And a Freedom People and thats a freedom that people in have, i guess. I know in america have, i guess. I know hes hated because of how hes just hated because of how hes just hated because of how he , defend some of he flip flopped, defend some of the flopping , saying at the the flip flopping, saying at the time decision i made was time the decision i made was appropriate the information time the decision i made was ahad priate the information time the decision i made was ahad. Riate the information time the decision i made was ahad. Obviously,3 information i had. Obviously, retrospectively, looks retrospectively, it all looks like theres some flip flopping going there. I have going on there. I have a dissenter over here, louis. This is a report from someone at of oxford whose at university of oxford Whose Research there is no research concluded there is no evidence masks made any evidence that masks made any difference whatsoever. This , uh, you know what . This, uh, you know what . First of all, theres no evidence. And not only this is evidence. And not only this is not some Guy University of oxford. Been dozens oxford. Theres been dozens and dozens of studies all across. There of dozens of there were dozens of dozens of studies, before even before studies, even before even before this covid thing. And mr fauci is not hated because he flip flopped. Mr fauci was hated because hes a tool of the vaccine mongering covid believing World Economic forum haters of human. Okay. Were going to take a break now. Weve made it. So you have house. You have to denounce what i just said. The bingo. The bingo. The fact thats brilliant. The fact is, is anthony is, is that is that Anthony Fauci should be put on trial and if hes found guilty, he should be put in jail or worse or worse. Hes a representative of every thing thats bad about the last three years that didnt say globalist. Globalist. Im sorry i missed globalist. Im sorry i missed globalist. Well, there we go. Everyone put down shot glasses. Put down your shot glasses. Now weve. But come weve made it halfway. But come back happy female spy back for some happy female spy is dangerous is an extremely dangerous pensioners. See you then. Pensioners. See you then. That warm feeling inside from boxt boilers. Proud sponsors of weather on. Gb news. Weather on. Gb news. Hello there. Good evening. Hello there. Good evening. Im jonathan vautrey. Who is your gb news Weather Forecast provided by the met office. Hope provided by the met office. Hope you enjoyed your weekend. It is ending on fairly note for ending on a fairly fine note for many of us. Lot of clear many of us. A lot of clear intervals through the evening and away from the far and overnight away from the far north scotland. Is going north of scotland. That is going to breezier and to remain a bit breezier and cloudier. Some mist and fog cloudier. Some mist and fog patches underneath patches will form underneath those skies, particularly those clear skies, particularly for eastern england, south east england, northern england, but also Northern Ireland quite murky. Ireland turning quite murky. First monday morning first thing on monday morning for most of though, will for most of us, though, it will be warm start. Be a fairly mild warm start. Temperatures 14, 15 c in temperatures around 14, 15 c in a lot of our towns and cities. A lot of our towns and cities. Once that mist and fog does eventually clear its way off, monday to be a pretty monday promises to be a pretty glorious for many of us. A glorious day for many of us. A good sunshine for the good swathe of sunshine for the vast majority of the uk. It will vast majority of the uk. It will be a bit breezy around west be a bit breezy around the west country and gusty along some coastal here and always coastal lines here and always cloud very cloud lingering across the very far north scotland. Far north of scotland. Drizzly outbreaks of rain for shetland as elsewhere in that as well. But elsewhere in that Sunshine Feeling very warm widely the mid 20s, if not widely into the mid 20s, if not the high 20s across southern england wales. High pressure england and wales. High pressure sticks the middle sticks with us into the middle part but part of the week, but it re orientate so we tap re orientate itself so we tap into airflow that into a southerly airflow that allows us to in even allows us to feed in some even warmer conditions from continental. So on the continental europe. So on the grand scheme of things , tuesday grand scheme of things, tuesday looks another fine looks like another pretty fine day for many of again, still day for many of us. Again, still quite blustery across the southwest. Higher cloud southwest. Some higher cloud pushing across northern pushing in across Northern Ireland as well, turning the sunshine, cloud just sunshine, haze and cloud just still lingering across parts of orkney , the isle of lewis, but orkney, the isle of lewis, but still amounts of sunshine still plenty amounts of sunshine to temperatures to be had and temperatures peaking and peaking around wednesday and thursday. Over 30 c. Thursday. Over 30 c. That warm feeling inside from boxt boilers. Proud sponsors of weather on. Think theyll crack. On welcome back to headliners, where weve just spent the last couple of minutes learning how lewis has such a beautiful jaw. Much for that thank you so much for that information. Yeah, tweeting about to find out. About it afterwards to find out. Tweeting this well, im tweeting about this right well, im tweeting about this rigiim getting to im just getting people to put lets put down your phone and lets get with this. Job in get on with this. The job in hand. Okay. Going straight into mondays mail. This is the job is letting people is people know were on this is your job. People know were on this is youwill. Homeland be calling will your homeland be calling you no , the you to enlist, lewis no, the answer is no. No , no. This is not even no, no. This is not even a non story. This is a non future non story. This is a non future story. Its republicans story. Its republicans increasingly serious about plan to invade mexico to crush cartels because people because theyre bringing in fentanyl, which is like a heroin opiate substitute. And its so powerful andifs substitute. And its so powerful and its killing 100,000 people and its killing 100,000 people a year. Its a total nightmare. And its theyre taking chinese drugs and theyre taking chinese precursor chemicals and theyre combining them in mexico. And weve got to do something to stop but the republicans who stop it. But the republicans who are not in power because only the president of the United States can troops in states can send troops in america. So the idea that the republicans can do anything right now and they dont have the is maybe the president , the idea is maybe theyre republican theyre holding the republican democrats , asking democrats to account, asking them. Right. So thats what does that mean . So theyre saying to them, know, troops. Them, you know, send troops. The fact the republicans are more fact is the republicans are more concerned an open border, concerned about an open border, which is facilitating. Okay but arguably, the stuff would get in anyway. Ron desantis is basically saying necessarily, but ron desantis is saying day one, he would send troops. I one, he would send troops. I mean, how realistic is this . Is this because the mexican president is basically saying this just politics . President is basically saying thisyeah,;t politics . President is basically saying thisyeah,;t poisics . President is basically saying thisyeah,;t poisic� mean , its yeah, this is i mean, its against International Law and its a great sound bite, isnt it . Talking at it . Its talking tough. And at some point it not following through and finding reason to through and finding a reason to do trump this with the do it. Trump did this with the locker up, locker up. Oh, never do it. Trump did this with the lociaround ocker up. Oh, never do it. Trump did this with the lociaround to ker up. Oh, never do it. Trump did this with the lociaround to locking h, never do it. Trump did this with the lociaround to locking h, iup. Er got around to locking her up. Lets missiles and blow up lets send missiles and blow up parts of mexico. Oh, wont parts of mexico. Oh, we wont get if we talk get around to it. But if we talk tough might the tough now, we might get the votes they that documentary. Sicario. I believe that sicario. I believe that other thing present danger. Thing clear and present danger. They said, well, you know what . It is sending troops to the. If youre sending the border. If youre sending troops in, it probably means that people arent going to be trying over the border trying to cross over the border at so solve at the same time. So itll solve that about that problem. Was i wrong about was saying was i wrong about saying the republicans are not serious because ive heard nothing about this i am totally i watch this and i am totally i watch why wrote an article to why they wrote an article to tell you it. But you know tell you about it. But you know what . The telegraph is becoming tell you about it. But you know what . And� telegraph is becoming tell you about it. But you know what . And more|raph is becoming tell you about it. But you know what . And more likei is becoming tell you about it. But you know what . And more likei is tguardian more and more like the guardian every. I do. I every single day. I do. I i think so. Im noticing it. They used to think that theyd be like , right. Like, right. I mean, it could be that theyre taking republican nomination president ial hopefuls at their own words. I think its four of the of the people up for it basically saying exactly the same and was their first. E e but that doesnt mean theyre serious about it. Its an election campaign. No, youre right. No, youre right. They and cant done. More mail. And when even gandhi fails, your purity test, perhaps the problem is you, steve. Me, not you specifically me. Me, not you specifically me. Just whoevers holding these purity tests tonight, downing street fights labours drive to remove Winston Churchill , remove Winston Churchill, Horatio Nelson and gandhi from road names. This in wales and welsh this is in wales and welsh labour are like the extreme laboun theyre going for it. Theyre going for it. But this is a stupid idea because dont hand an easy win to a party that has said out loud the quiet bit of we want to fight the next election on culture wars dont give them these culture. War wins. Dont try. And even if you want to do these things, shut about it these things, shut up about it until the election. So until the next election. So it very would very much seems like it would not achieve much if theyre not achieve much even if theyre trying to do through trying to do it through good means. Just going to be means. Its just going to be exactly what conservatives exactly what what conservatives want. Exactly. Want. Yes, exactly. And but i mean, louis, theres legislation. I believe theres legislation. I believe theres a bill introduced in england that actually its actually quite a democratic thing where the street, the road itself to have two thirds of itself has to have two thirds of the voting. If they the residents voting. If they want names, they want to change the names, they dont. They havent put this through but thats through for wales, but thats quite a good idea, isnt it . I heard that. I hadnt heard about that. But i think its on page two of the article. Know. You know, there are you know. You know, there are more than one page. Wow this is one of these stories that just depresses the hell out of because. Because i, you of me because. Because i, you know what . You know whats happened i read things like happened when i read things like this, liking this, i actually start liking this, i actually start liking this country and i start remembering what is so good about this country. And when you about this country. And when you see people who are hating on this place, hating on Winston Churchill, Horatio Nelson or other great english people like Mahatma Gandhi , you had to just Mahatma Gandhi, you had to just step on my sorry. Im sorry, mate. Oh, thats terrible. That was one joke that was made by one joke. Well, you know what . I actually think . Mean, im very actually think . I mean, im very much against the welsh changing there because these are the these are the only people i can pronounce. Yeah hey, im joking. Well right, louis, according to this mail story, a female 007 would more likely be zero six. Yeah. Double zero six, no, 006. 7. Because theyd be 11. 006. 7. Because theyd be 11. Theyd be being paid 11 less or seven. Well, let me do the link again then. Again then. Its in the daily mail. It says that female spies bugged. They say theres a gender gap that says British Secret service says reveal that women are paid less to do the same frontline roles as men and a lot of the people being paid less 11 at listening centre , the gchq hq listening centre, the gchq hq general well, whatever that is, headquarters and the women are being paid less for listening. But thats what women like to do. There are a bunch of busybodies and eavesdroppers. Well, i was wondering how you would in there. Yeah, this misogyny. And yeah, this is misogyny. And the the story was very the fact is i the story was very short. I dont know the details, but the details are probably the women work fewer hours, they work different jobs. They dont ask for raises. The way men ask for raises. I mean, yes. Okay. Weve seen this before where theres this this disparity of wages and it turns out its for these factors. But i mean, im sure that you agree, steve, that if they are doing the course they the same job of course they should be getting. Yeah and the article says but youre right, its a very short article. I mean, would article. I mean, it would be because going to some because theres going to be some people who are quite secretive about spies about what they do to the spies. So no wonder have all. So no wonder we dont have all the. I it that, the details. I hope it is that, though, is the same though, that if it is the same exactly because exactly the same jobs because weve had court cases the weve had court cases like the asda cashiers were asda one where cashiers were saying we do the same thing as the warehouses. I the people in the warehouses. I know you dont know if i had to pick work the pick where i had to work the freezing cold warehouse or sitting going, beep, sitting inside going, beep, i know which one id rather do. So maybe actually say maybe they do. They actually say beep job. Beep when they do the job. I dont it quite a lot, i dont hear it quite a lot, but mean, there is an but also, i mean, there is an argument, that argument, of course, that the female service agents, female secret service agents, frontline staff should be getting paid more because they seem lot riskier of seem to be a lot riskier of being all in gold being like painted all in gold or covered in oil. Thank you. Thats a thats a movie reference. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you so much for explaining the humour there would do there, lewis. What would i do without in the without my shachtman in the corner tuesdays telegraph has Yorkshire Police covering themselves in glory. Steve no , no. Keep males out steve no, no. Keep males out of women only spaces. Sticker picture investing rated as hate crime. This headline is actually really bad because all the info its like a german sentence. The verbs at the end of the word. So this pensioner who was this is a pensioner who was questioned she took a questioned because she took a picture of a sticker on poster picture of a sticker on a poster. Okay. Didnt post picture. Okay. Didnt post the picture. This is getting confusing, so just took a picture, didnt put didnt sticker the didnt put the sticker on the poster, took a picture of something, didnt post it on social and with social media and agreed with it. But somehow this then gets investigated by the same police whove done such great whove recently done such great hits having that issue with hits as having that issue with the autistic girl who said that police like her Police Officer looked like her lesbian nana, which surely its a matter of opinion. We never saw the picture of the nana, did we . That really i mean, we . I think that really i mean, she have very young i she might have been a compliment. She might have been a conspot ent. She might have been a conspot on. So the spot on. Yeah. So the worrying thing about this, though, is it wasnt the though, is that it wasnt the putting the sticker on. It was simply picture of it. Simply taking a picture of it. If the person taking the picture of it was against the sticker, sure. The police never would have said anything. Yes, i mean, this is ridic i mean, were talking its west Yorkshire Police. We should name Yorkshire Police. We should name and also. The second and shame also. The second theyve got the second most highest crime rate in the country their are country, 90 of their crimes are unsolved. The fact that they are unsolved. The fact that they are and to track this and they have to track this person down cctv , this person down using cctv, this surely. Lewis this is an unbelievable , awful use of unbelievable, awful use of resources, let alone their human right to take a photo of something. Something. Well, i mean, this country is descending into and as in america is descending into a police state. Its we here are constantly being badgered by ofcom. Its a total no, no, no. Ofcom. Its a total no, no, no. Its you, lewis. You, lewis. Its you, lewis. You, lewis. Quite specifically new total. Well, let them badger me. Its total sense because im the only person who speaks his mind here. Censorship. Here. But its total censorship. And this is horrible because its not even its not even the woman desecrated a poster that was there. She didnt write on it. She didnt put a label on it. She didnt put a label on it. She didnt put a label on it. She took a picture it. She just took a picture of somebody. Somebody else, did something. Yeah, i was going to say, i am worried because am slightly worried because i took pictures in edinburgh because someones been spray painting around there. Wont surname tony i wont say the surname is a and whoever has done that has painted loads of has spray painted it loads of places they spell, places and they cant spell, right . I took loads of right . So i took loads of pictures now im a bit pictures of it. Now im a bit worried picture of worried taking a picture of stuff get arrested. Stuff will get you arrested. West just dont go to west yorkshire. Right . All yorkshire. Right . Thats all for part coming up the part three. But coming up in the final ancient final section, we have ancient apes, life after death. And what is a skinny . Stick around to find out welcome back to headliners. And its the telegraph to kick us off and everything we knew about humanity is wrong. Steve yes. Of 8. 7 million year discovery of 8. 7 million year old ape rewrite its story. The ape doesnt do the rewriting of the history here on earth. Fossilised remains in turkey suggest that human origins may actually lie in europe. So before these early hominids, we kind of thought they all kind of thought they were all in africa out. Kind of thought they were all in africthis out. Kind of thought they were all in africthis does out. Kind of thought they were all in africthis does not out. Kind of thought they were all in africthis does not prove, out. Kind of thought they were all in africthis does not prove, butut. Kind of thought they were all in africthis does not prove, but may and this does not prove, but may suggest they could be. Some early hominids move to europe. Early hominids move to europe. Turkey not that far in, and then maybe went back. Im less maybe went back. Im less impressed. I know i normally love a sciencey story, but this does not seem to be moving any needle for me. It isnt moving. It isnt moving. It isnt moving. Sorry. Yeah. Yeah. Well this is. Is. This is is. This is a is. This is a late story. This has been known for like, 20, 30 years. What happened was, is according to dr. Richard johnson, you should look this up. And johnson, you should look this up. And talking about uric acid. Richard johnson , Richard Richard johnson, Richard Johnson, Richard Johnson hotels. Hope hes not american. Hope hes not american. Hope hes not american. Yeah. Yeah thats true. Yeah. Yeah thats true. I just realised what a funny name that is. Its its. Its that. Its that the story of us owens is that. Is that. That. Its that the story of us owens is that. Is that. Is that owens is that. Is that. Is that the great apes they used to be 20 species of great apes and they moved up north when it was warm and they lived in the north in europe and then it got cold and the only apes that survives were ones who developed uric acid, which enabled them to eat to eat. Okay, well, were well done. Okay, well, were well done. Okay, well, were well done. I dont know if either of you have truly covered this story properly its the you properly because its the you know, theres an argument. Well, traditionally, its been thought that the cradle of humanity was africa. Now 1. 5 million years africa. Now 1. 5 million years before the apes that we have seen in history that humans evolved from, were now seeing those apes that are the precursors to them originating actually more in europe. Actually more in europe. Oh, no, no, no. This thats not thats thats what this story says. Thats what this says. Thats what this story says. But is, that but the actual truth is, is that the great its kind of it kind of helped in europe because because some great apes went up to they up to europe. They to they went up to europe. They developed ability to eat developed this ability to eat sugan developed this ability to eat sugar, to metabolise fructose and alcohol. And then when it and alcohol. And then when it got colder, they moved down. Theres no evidence of any apesin theres no evidence of any apes in africa before the 8. 7 million anyway. Look, you know what . You better read the telegraph article yourself. I think daily star now, think the daily star now, unfortunately , we have our unfortunately, we have our very own us own dr. Schaefer to tell us which Conspiracy Theory is true. This is. This is. This is this guy, avi loeb, who is basically i mean, i dont like to say anybodys been ridiculed, but the truth is , ridiculed, but the truth is, hes an astrophysicist. Anybody whos a physicist is i dont respect nothing personal. I dont respect it at all. Is that is that it says that they found a meteor that that was in the ocean and it had different stuff than whats on earth. But thats than whats on earth. But thats to be expected because the fact is, is that meteors enter our solar system all the time and they land on earth and theyre going to bring stuff from outer space. Yeah, but i mean, hes also essentially saying that it could be a spacecraft, an alien spacecraft. Spacecraft. Yeah, it could. It should have maybe possibly lifting. Firstly , id like to correct firstly, id like to correct the besmirched of my reputation. I was chemist, not a i was a chemist, not a physicist. So same difference. Chemist chemist, physicist, physicist , chemist chemist, physicist, physicist, chemist. I never chemist chemist, physicist, physicist , chemist. I never got physicist, chemist. I never got to touch it. Lady, im sorry. Im sorry , lady, im sorry. Im sorry, steve, because i. I think chemistry is. Is perhaps the chemistry is. Is perhaps the most respectable of all the science. Science. It was handy at parties. We turn up with all that neat alcohol. But point is , alcohol. But the point is, theres no way. This from theres no way. This is from a spacecraft , right . Because if spacecraft, right . Because if you invent a space craft you can invent a space craft that can travel faster than the speed and arrive speed of light and then arrive at your destination and have a little around , stuff aint little look around, stuff aint going fall off there. Level going to fall off there. Level of technology, surely is. The auens of technology, surely is. The aliens arent going to be leaving small, small balls falling space. Falling off their space. Well, ive learned something. Thank there, doctor. Well, ive learned something. Thesteve there, doctor. Well, ive learned something. Thesteve allen there, doctor. Well, ive learned something. Thesteve allen , there, doctor. Well, ive learned something. Thesteve allen , chemist. Doctor. Dr. Steve allen, chemist. Chemist. Fine. An actual doctor next in the mail with a bit of a im a theoretical steve, im a theoretical physicist. Not my words. The words of this theoretical physicist and heres why. Life after death is in possible. Its the one us scientist has looked into it. Theoretical physicist sean carroll says that theres no way basically its information theory. Theres no way that the information thats in that who in your head that makes you who you you could end up you think you are could end up anywhere else. Theres protons, electrons and neutrons. I mean, in model, theres in the standard model, theres some but some other stuff as well, but theres no way that this any theres no way that this can any way connect it to an way kind of connect it to an afterlife. Use afterlife. You can use thermodynamics to point out why ghosts cant even be thing. Ghosts cant even be a thing. None this makes a difference none of this makes a difference because enjoy because people who believe enjoy believing in spite evidence. Believing in spite of evidence. Okay, so this is sort of good news in that when dies, he news in that when lewis dies, he will 100 be dead. Is that what youre saying . Dont. Will youre saying . I dont. It will only and live on in his only continue and live on in his calendars. Therell be calendars. So therell be a higgs around going higgs boson going around going like seen talk higgs boson going around going like me seen talk higgs boson going around going like me. Seen talk about me. Thats fine. Thats fine. Well, the thing is, the thing is, right. Is, steve, you might be right. But the fact is that anybody who says im a theoretical physicist, i dont. I want to be careful with the word that i use. Can i say the word t w a no . No, i cant say that word is a w a n no , i no . No, i cant say that word is awanno,icantsay no . No, i cant say that word is a w a n no , i cant say that. A w a n no, i cant say that. Word is. Word is. Youre a really good speller. Youre a really good speller. I didnt know that about you i is an idiot. Is an idiot. Yeah. Can i say the word idiot . You say idiot. You say idiot. Anybody whos a physicist, anybody whos a physicist is. Anybody whos a physicist, anyokay. Nhos a physicist is. Anybody whos a physicist, anyokay. Nhos ayousicist is. Anybody whos a physicist, anyokay. Nhos ayou for st is. Anybody whos a physicist, anyokay. Nhos ayou for the ;. Anybody whos a physicist, anyokay. Nhos ayou for the lewis okay. Thank you for the Lewis Schaffer input there. The guardian. You guardian. Now what do you make of dog . Guardian. Now what do you make of dogiog . Guardian. Now what do you make of dog hating nickname , act big dog hating nickname, act early to stop it catching on. Etiquette experts say. And it etiquette experts say. And it says it says if someone calls you i never had that problem because i used to be called big, big rooster schaffer. That was my nickname. Nickname . What was your nickname . What was your nickname . But it wasnt big rooster. But it wasnt rooster. The other rooster. It was the other shortened. Shortened word for rooster. Someone see you in the shower . No. Em em its like, what do you call an a hen . An opposite of a hen . Yeah , i know. Yeah, i know. Yeah, i know. People online think you are one of those, but i defend you. I never call you one of i would never call you one of those your face. Those to your face. I but a joke about my i but it was a joke about my private parts. Okay. Very good. I mean, what. Do you think of this, what. What do you think of this, steve . To be steve . I mean, it seems to be like if dont to like if you dont want to be called a nickname, just ask people to not call. People politely to not call. Dont call piggy. Thats dont call me piggy. Thats what the section that says. Dont. Dont show like, dont. Dont show that youre need like, dont. Dont show that yo respond need like, dont. Dont show that yo respond and need like, dont. Dont show that yo respond and mask need like, dont. Dont show that yo respond and mask irritation. To respond and mask irritation. Be. And then theres be nonchalant. And then theres a here that pretend not to a bit here that pretend not to react. If someone uses the nickname, thats the genius. They go, sorry, i thought you meant someone. Baldy right. Whatever. Baldy right. Whatever. Baldy right. More guardian to finish hey, more guardian to finish on with the best of british. Steve, very quickly. Steve, very quickly. These inventions, the zucchini and a self cleaning path. Its a swimsuit bikini. Path. Its a swimsuit bikini. The zucchini. Thought path. Its a swimsuit bikini. The couldini. Thought path. Its a swimsuit bikini. The could swim thought path. Its a swimsuit bikini. The could swim in thought path. Its a swimsuit bikini. The could swim in a thought path. Its a swimsuit bikini. The could swim in a bikini. 1t path. Its a swimsuit bikini. The could swim in a bikini. I you could swim in a bikini. I dont them. So dont really wear them. So thats fine. W a e a [10 w. Text theres a no no, but lets just say any more lets just say this any more because this is my favourite thing. A bit thing. If youre a bit overweight whatever it looks overweight or whatever it looks like a midriff, but like you can see a midriff, but really its covering it up. Optical illusion. Okay. Whats your favourite thing . Bob tell both. Whats okay. Whats your favourite thingfavouritell both. Whats okay. Whats your favourite thingfavourite invention. Whats okay. Whats your favourite thingfavourite invention. Withe; path . A self cleaning path. So its a self cleaning path. If dog it, it if it detects dog mark on it, it can water and its an can spray water and its an opfion can spray water and its an option it waits for dog option if it waits for the dog to seconds, option if it waits for the dog to me seconds, option if it waits for the dog to me your seconds, option if it waits for the dog to me your favourite seconds, invention. My father was a patent attorney. You know that . Attorney. Yes, you know that . Attorney. Yes, you k know1at . Attorney. Yes, you k know that. Yeah. Yes, i did know that. Yeah. Yeah, yes, i did know that. Yeah. Yeai, yes, i did know that. Yeah. Yeai dont. I actually patented i dont. I actually patented or tried to. Okay. Thank you so much for okay. Thank you so much for that input. The show is nearly over. Oven this was the worst show. This was the worst show. Another quick look at mondays worst show. I think its the best one. I think its the best one. To with i think its the best one. Times to with i think its the best one. Times as to with i think its the best one. Times as hundreds to with i think its the best one. Times as hundreds of with i think its the best one. Times as hundreds of schools the times as hundreds of schools still in dark over safety fears, the Daily Mail Councils allow staff to work from the beach. The school crisis, no the guardians school crisis, no extra for says extra cash for repairs, says treasury the mirror promise treasury the mirror my promise to workers. Financial times. Russias banks propped up by chinese cash after sanctions and the trek or heat. Those are the star trek or heat. Those are your front pages. Thats all we have time for. Thank to have time for. Thank you to my guest allen louis guest, steve and allen and louis schaefer. Is the schaefer. I think this is the best back best show ever. Were back tomorrow at 11 pm. When louis is return. Maybe. Yes. Is going to return. Maybe. Yes. With cox and simon evans in with paul cox and simon evans in the hot seat. And if youre watching stay tuned watching at 5 am, stay tuned for breakfast. Thank you for joining night. For breakfast. Thank you for joir he night. For breakfast. Thank you for joir he hates night. For breakfast. Thank you for joir he hates me night. For breakfast. Thank you for joir he hates me. Night. He hates me. He hates me. The temperatures rising. The temperatures rising. Boxt solar proud sponsors of weather on. Gb news. Weather on. Gb news. Hello there. Good evening. Hello there. Good evening. Im jonathan vautrey. Who is your gb news . Weather forecast provided by the met office. Hope you enjoyed your weekend. It is ending on fairly fine note for ending on a fairly fine note for many of a lot of clear many of us. A lot of clear intervals through evening intervals through the evening and overnight away from the far north of scotland. That is going to and to remain a bit breezier and cloudier. Some fog cloudier. Some mist and fog patches will form underneath those skies , particularly those clear skies, particularly for england. Southeast for eastern england. Southeast england, but also Northern Ireland quite murky. Ireland turning quite murky. First morning. First thing on monday morning. For most of us, though, it will be mild start. Be a fairly mild warm start. Temperatures around 1415 c in a lot of towns and cities. Lot of our towns and cities. Once that mist and fog does eventually clear its way off, monday to be pretty monday promises to be a pretty glorious for many of us. Glorious day for many of us. A good of sunshine for the good swathe of sunshine for the vast majority of uk. It will vast majority of the uk. It will be a bit breezy around the west country. Gusty some country. Gusty along some coastlines and always cloud coastlines here and always cloud lingering far lingering across the very far north of scotland. Drizzly outbreaks of rain for shetland as elsewhere in that as well. But elsewhere in that sunshine very warm Sunshine Feeling very warm widely into the mid 20s. If not the high 20s across southern england and wales. Pressure england and wales. High pressure sticks the middle sticks with us into the middle part but it part of the week, but it re orientate itself tap re orientate itself so we tap into air flow that into a southerly air flow that allows us feed in some even allows us to feed in some even warmer conditions from continental europe. On the continental europe. So on the grand scheme of things, tuesday looks another pretty fine looks like another pretty fine day of us. Again, still day for many of us. Again, still quite blustery across the south west, some higher cloud pushing across northern pushing in across Northern Ireland well, the ireland as well, turning the sunshine cloud sunshine haze. Youre in cloud just across just still lingering across parts orkney, isle of parts of orkney, the isle of lewis. Still plenty amounts lewis. But still plenty amounts of be had and of sunshine to be had and temperatures peaking around wednesday. Thursday. Over wednesday. And thursday. Over 30 c. 30 c. The temperatures rising. Boxt the temperatures rising. Boxt solar proud sponsors of weather on and ellie, heres whats leading the news this morning. The news this morning. Students across the country are set to return to class this week and the government is now under pressure to reveal the exact number of schools at risk of collapse. This is jeremy hunt of collapse. This is jeremy hunt says the government will spend what it takes to make schools safe for some crumbling concrete. Well be putting that to the test this morning. Elsewhere , as parliament elsewhere, as parliament returns from a six week recess, the Prime Minister has been warned that its make or break on small boats as the home office recorded the highest daily number of crossings in the channel so far this year. Meanwhile , sir keir starmer meanwhile, sir keir starmer says there will be no income tax rises if labour wins power. The labour leader vowed to kick the economy out of the doom loop of low growth and high taxes and Manchester United forward. Manchester united forward. Jadon sancho says hes been a scapegoat for a long