Oh, my goodness. I love you. I. I love you so. Happy tuesday, everybody. All right. Today, childrens picture book day. So thats why tho one can reach President Biden after the department of health and Human Services says doctors must obtain informed consent before performing a services exm i wish someone told my dentist that nearly one third of americans dont know. Viewing a Solar Eclipse with a Naked Eyhird Oe permanently dame their vision. There cs only one other thing you can see that poses the same danger. Over the weekend, four inches of rain in southern california, a new two year total not seen sinceraa the latend 1800s. 1 there was so much rain in l. A. Governor newsom had to move tom cruise to higher ground. Texas health servicesg th are raising the alarm after a person tested positive for bird flu sincee its texas. He was immediately served with coleslaw and cornbread. Scientists portugal embrdentally created a mouse embryo with six legs and no. Hmm six legs and no. Sounds like green day. Oh, shots fired. I like that. A man walking on Cayman Islands beach discovered a bottle that contained a handwritten messagovered ae. Heres what it said. Hmm. Not really a joke there, but. Okay. Fords just the list of the worlds billionaires. Or as ie th call it, my liste of people that kidnap. A new study found that male menopause real. Oh, so thats why im unable to get pregnant. All right. So, over the weekend, nbc news, which stands for nothing but published Story Titledished they came for floridas sun and sand. They got soaring costs and a culture war. Master and its a masterpiece of Cherry Picking or orange picking sincepi. It is florida, which means its time for reporter is coming around. And the narrative aroun is oe they demand. So well twist on the factsdi because in 1980 thats the times to tell the stortoy. Data they get, they choose to discredit Tens Of Millions Seof dollars in sales by lying to me was my car and mentally ill. Now, as we all know, since the pandemic, people are flocking to florida like lizzo to a food truck. But did you know that notd yo everybody is glad they did . Says nbc. While hundreds of thousands of new residents have flockeds c to state on the promise of beautiful weather, no income tax and loweke sr costs. , five nearly 500,000 left in 2020 to contributing to their move was a perfect storm of soaring, a hostile political environment, worsening traffi2 with hostilece weather. They got all that froml that interviewing 12 people. Ha ha ha. M 2 peopleyeah. 12 people who left the stateft in the past two years. But sadly, the writer also hadtw to admit that florida is the adt second Fastest Growing statehe as of july 2023, meaningt that many more moved in thenmovn actually moved out. So is Stevent Actu Green at pj a says about this piece. Its like claiming that a restaurant is losing customers by only counting the peoplikeho who have paid their checks and walked out the door. Hmm. No w, of course, that would n kill any story about a socalled exodusf cour, but it didnt. Instead, nbc found a few people to tellalled ex their st. One woman who moved t to florida from Connecticull Tht in 2021 complained she didnt know it would be 100 degreest kw at night. First of all, when is 100 whe degrees not the perfect Sleeping Temperature for women . Oh, im so cold. That should be on the epitaphitp on the tombstone of every woman who ever lived. But thats right she didnt know it would be so hot in florida. E did noyou. You thin you think the motto on their License Plates would have tipped her off . Its the sunshine state, not the pitch black dark. You did. Its why part of the state is called the panhandle. D th and where anybody living there over the agewhere ev of 30 has more facial wrinkles than a sharpies dipped in ice. Es tha plus, did you know that theres a lot of traffic . Who knew that other than everybody . And ive got news for you, lady. Fo when the age of the averagef th driver is 84 on any road in america, theres going to ber. Yeah i, right. See, when she moved to florida, she didnt realize it would be florida. Shes like that easily offended Comedy Club Audience Member who didnt read up on the headliner and i member sh comedian sense of humor doesnt mirror her own, so she walks out. F humo nbc news also cites cos prices and insurance. Consu imagine that. A place thats becomings an more popular also becoming more expensive. Meanwhile, in Californiae Populo you airbnb, the Oakland Coliseum for 85 bucks a nighnt. And did you know that ifr hoe you live in florida, your home might be damaged by a hurricane . Why did someone tell these people florida has hurricanes . If only Florida Sports Teams gave us a hinturricane right . Oh, yeah. The miami hurricanes field 16 teams. Baseball, basketball, football ,even womens soccer. And thats not even reaams w one guy said he felt unsafe h because everyone walks around with guns there. Oh, dear god ue, florida likese guns. Well, you would be, too, if you were sandwiched between haitandi. Georgia. Hasnt this dude ever seen it of cops . You think its a coincidence . Every other episodere was shotwh in broward county. I just hear that name, and i start Flushingn Browar down the. Nbc news also reports Toile Floridians are fleeing the state over its increasingly conservative, includinge stat a cracked crackdown on undocumented immigrants, a Ban On Transgender Care for minors, State Interventions in how, slavery and sexuality are taught in schools. Ns and in other words, more ls are enforced. Children arent sterilized for Playins Anral Lawsg with the wrn and people dont assume youre racist for being whitnges meaning the only people fleeing are liberal. Did who belong there in the first place. Fleeing the state is just another way of expressing a all tolerance theyre known for, and so they should go. So nbc found a dozen people, literally 12, who moved to florida with unrealistic expectationsc foun. No now regret it. ,i could find 12 people who say seth meyers is funny. If i asked his writers, perhaps. But hey, florida is doing great. Thanks to governor desantis. So nbc news feels duty bound to treat it like a San Francisco sidewalk and takea a dump on it. Now speakin g san fran, a new report from wallet hub rates it as the healthiest city in the country. Truet as Dodging Street Turds is great cardio and open air. Cr drug use must be great forg s the lungs. Nice work while it hub manage managing to overlook minor things like crime, homelessness and the overdose epidemic. Naging t what the is wallet t well, its a finance company. H . Where is it headquartered . Floridfinance a. Fact is no live, it wants to remain. Who wants to remain in Good Standing . Can say anythingts about it. Hing democrat cause, nightmare or a anything good about a republican a success. But even democrats dont really believe this. Ccesjust ask aoc and Gretchen Whitmer when theyre vacationing in florida. Lets welcome tonights scarce. He takes outside the box. But enough about what he sleeps in. Lewelcome founder the life of ty. Com michael loft is shes tall and lanky and you can takeip her tips to the bank. Financial analyst heathe Tr I Se Sweet Petite and wont sell pictures of her feet. New york times she e an sew and Fox News Contributor kat timp f. And he turns lot of heads when a he snaps their necks. New york times best sellin lo author, comedian and former nba writer. Michael, you travel the rails as a happy go lucky hobo. Is a you find that s. F. Is the best place for a shabby degeneratye like yourself. If youre a health nut. Yeah, because. Because francisco is so mic wealthy. You know what City Camehael y in five. What . Washington, d. C. Just so running for your life. R i think that maybe thatsn how theyre trying to frame the Biden Administration as, like, just cardio because timekt you look at the price of Something Like coffee. Oh, thats expensiveices. I love all of it. I just love all the whole. An oh, San Francisco was good. Floridas bad. And ini read the interviewi with that lady. Yeah. Who left the i and i didnt. I didnt think itd be hot. You know, thats likte going to a strip club and going where all these come from. Theres everywhere. She had a horribly. Sh e says she had an armadillo had infestation. I didnt even know that was a thing. Yeah, right. And to me, thats like, thats like god giving you a gift. Its like youre not having great time in florida. Please enjoy these havin armadillosa. Armadi right. God never closes a door without opening up an armadillo petting zoo. That is so true. I had you know, i had anad armadillo infestation. It turnsn. Er room. I got it from the locker room. Oh, heather, a likely story. Heather, you were a business maven. Sure. Grokay. Tonight . For tonight. Why do you think theyre going Afteee Justor florida . And you, by the way, you liver l in florida . I do. Theyre kindorida d by default,d into. Well, my my husbands family is from there. And so we moved down to florida, hated miami, love broward county. Bri know you said all the cops are show in broward county, but weut big fans, we meaning the majority of floridians of desantis as policies. He just had a Spring Break Curfew down in miami past week. It worked very well. The residents of miami very thankful. And hes banning social media for kids under 14. So its working really well. I mean u, said 12 people movedl out, i believe, back in 2022to,e about 500,000 moved out. Thats what nbc is referring to. Yes, but still a lot more people. Mass exodus from new york antd, california, which are democratic run states coming down to florida. And you know what . The 500,000 that moved out are liberal, progressive. Go ahead. You know, bye bye. Theyre not coming there because of desantis whether ora. Not. Right, kat . Yeah. They were complaining about a lot of things, political strifeu in insurance rates. What State Woult D they go to where that would be less . In this day and age . That and, no. Im going to florida in a couple of weeks. Yeah. Really . Km gotoyeah. No, my. My melbourne, Melbourne Show sold out, but tickets to the miami show are available now at the real kat timpf. Com. If youd like to join us. No, i right. I think florida is great, but i think a lot these people, the way they set up their statements was kind of like, you know what, i was expecting this, this utopia of sorts right. Ents w and they seem likeas people trying to run away from themselvesexpectin. Om and if you think that moving somewhere is going to solvedin all your problems, generally not right, youre always not right if you dont google the placr probleure gene firste knowing about like whether it cains or it be makes me think tk that maybe you didnt even like google it. I do that just for vacation, right . Gr i liker and cr fly back this trip. Apparently they didnt that fora the moon because they were breaking all their clothes anyway. I dont know. Yeah, i do that just. Im going to a different neighborhood in new york. Gos, i believe, you know, a couple of things. Okay. San franciscyrus sao was number one because they had the most green spaces. Yes. Which means Placesecause T where people dont live. Yeah. So theyre Mountain Range is phenomenal. Yeah. Yeah. The top of the mountainsou that no humans can climb on. Lookntai, its the oceans are fl of great white sharks. So its, its no one else goes in the water. So i measharks sn thats the, ta the thing the whole article whice thinh i like. Ho wait a minute. How are they number one. Oh, because they have more Placeere Numbs that peoplep go because theyre stuck in the city running from their livela and. When they do run, they slip and fall in. Yeah, but yeah, the net is aenal phenomenal place. The other thing know the whole im place a you keep in your pocket. D anothei and the other thing iy pick people who are ill be polite down on their luck. So you left kansas because you lived a doublewide because of tornadoes and you couldnt get ahead in the midwest. You moved to florida and ended up i in a single wide. And if you dont keep your skirt down, im not Talkinthe Sie Ang about the onew physically wear, the one that goes around the house. Youre going to get tht Littlee Critters to go in there. And i get the armadillo thing. And to tell you the truthnt the you dont want them. They carry a lot of diseases. Yeah. So they a you cant pet them. Y and your Little Petting Zoo would be a murder zoo. I dont know where youre heading. There. You brought the same attitude in florida. The cats pointe in the,florid same problems follows you. Because its not kansas. Its not florida. Ke take a guess. Its a you know, it doesnte matter where you go. You got to the same yeah i was cats poin[bleep]. T. Im talking right now. Let them go. I love this audience. Hiding your fungus Damage Toenails yet . Clear. Healthy toenails with not ex nail clarifying gel in a clinical 90 of nails improved no matter how many years you struggle, nomics works. 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Its all the things that keep this world turning. The gotos that keep us going. The places we cheer. And check in. They all choose the advanced Network Solutions and round the Clock Partnership from Comcast Business. See why Comcast Business powers more Small Businesses than anyone else. Get started for 49. 99 a month plus ask how to get up to an 800 prepaid card. Dont wait call today. Back guarantee. Get your new favorite pair of jeans today and tailor available on the Apple App Store or android. The games are doing swell even they run ms. Shell, according to a new poll. Michelle obama isnt as strong a democratic candidate against former President Donald Trump as many Dems Woulddems W have you believe in a hypothetical matchup. My favorite kine yod trump ws with 47 of the vote compared to Michelle Obamas 44. I get some of the kids get who School Lunches she run are finally old enough to both run back. And what have we here. Hav is independent candidate Rfk Jr Making The Argument that President Biden is the much worse threat to democracyrgumen . Make the argument that President Biden is a muchn worse threat to democracy. And the reason for that isfis President Biden is the first candidate in history, the first president in historyt candid ths used the federal agents is t o censor political speech or censor his opponent. I couldnt have said it better myself. And democrats are also loweringg up to keep rfk off the ballot in multiple states, just likeho when i hot tub with larry kudlowarry, biden tydings as a third man. Its a political statement. Meantime, veteran democratic strategist James Carville has sounded the alarm on the Tried And True Dem base thats leaving joe and the party. And carvillen has been very v vocal about this. You ive been very vocaocl ti about this. Its horrifying. Our numbers among younger voters, particularly black blacks younger of latinos ,younger people of color, le, were note les shedding that. Theyre leaving the drop. Okay. All blacks. Yeah. I watch those blacks. But its true. Young men are leaving the dems faster than sports bar that puts on the wnba. Wnba. Nally, biden said he absolutely he had absolutely nothing to do whatsoever g with his own Whitewh House Proclaiming Easter Transgender Daowy visibility. Roll it. Speaker johnson said you betrayed the tenor of easter by proclaiming sunday, Easter Sunday as transgender day. He called it outrageous and abhorrent. At do you say to speaker johnson . Thoroughly uninformed, uninformedally uni i did and. I didnt do that. Well, after you did, mr. Pres, forget about the trans part. This is a guy who will sign or w do anything hes told because hes just happy he gets to Weare Diapers with the president ial seal. Whats you got to say . Noseal. No, no, no. My staff isnt in charge. Im the one making the decisions. Trans day of Visibilityn Chav is that was my idea. Ive been involved in trans issues since the very beginning. And Delaware Transitbegi is an amtrak transit. Hes called me amtrak, joe, and he gave me my own kid. I have to tell you thatn some days id pull the train a yard by myself. I pull in backwards caboose first, and mr. Topham had to be there to me, told joe, pulling in backwards again. Joe, give me a whistle. Oh. Heather, were you surprised that Michelle Obam a not polling better . Because i assumed she would just experiencd e. Oh, no. I mean. Well, i would expect her to do better than biden. I mean, yeah, shes a younger agn ase, i think, greater mental capacity. And the way the border is going, i dont think you caen get much worse. However, it is surprising that even among independents the and as well as democrats overall, not any bette anyr. In 2008, when barack obama was campaigning, he said he wanted to close not close the border outright. He saie ntedd, in favor of legal migration. But we want to know who thesee people and where theyre coming from. I want that obama back and notpi barack obama or Michelle Obama, but that type of democrat back in the office in the white house. Where are those democrats . I exist. And thats why the key issue among voters, regardless of what side youre on politically is the border right now. Nog to take ts goin a tough stance on the border, her poll numbers will not get any better. I dont thinakah stancek. Shes going to run. No, no, i dont think she can. I think you said this before, tara. Sh e cant because if she were to lose to trump, it would be the most humiliating, likey. Loss in history. Not just i dont know if i think i said that. And you add that thi but well thing look listen republicans she just kicked her. Shes up 15 points. I noticed this this weekend. Im not going to speak on it. We cant play with a lead every time republicans c get a lead, we do something stupid. But when d the polls say, youre up five. Were down ten. Exactly. Do chasing it. Cuse were focused, we stay on, but we get a lead. All of a theyre all rabbits. Taking a nap, watching sloww joe the turtle. How to catch us and catch us who did what . Ng supreme court. We. Hen i hear those polls,michel michelle, this. Shes not running. Does it matterlenoan . We got to say, eyeses o on the prize and just chill out. And could juse prizt roll on tt one more time. Nothing bothers me more thancant being called a black. I cannot stand it. And i was at a Partyhe I Wasrt forced to go to last week and one man came up to me and hes like, tyron me gutfeldp im like sloth, you drink. Hes all the guy had a few drinks and he is like, i talkedt to women. I was like, well, you are. What are we going to do about how these blacks vote . D i dont know. I what should we do . Doe, they voted fort the Democratic Party and they know democrats hadw ca. But how can they vote like that . I dont know. Theyre tricksters. You never trust them. Tryou know, theyre married to a white woman showing up up sarties, makea no a little babies. You cant tell what they are going to watch. Thess t telle was like he walker his wife came over, whispered something into the area for the rest of the night. He was trying to tal thet e nig i was like, no, were good. Ill stand the blacks thing. Its the its that white racism. Yeah. Racicat what would you like to discuss . Rfk yeah, i watched that interview and i and i loved it and i thought it was fascinating. I always think it is really thi fascinating to watch an independent be on tv. I meannk, im an independentd myself so maybe im biased but he presented a objectivelyi wellreasoned argument which is to say he had reasons for why he thought what he thought. And then she come s back, she says, okay, well, but trump question the Election Results is that not a threatn resu to democracy. And normally i think the interview would, if it was bawith a republicaltsn they go back and forth. Yes, it was. No, it wasnt. Yes, it was. No, it wasnt. But with him he saidck wit sai,i it was and im talkingm about this nowab. And she wasnt able to actually address his point about. Biden it was like a malfunctioning machine, really, because she was here. She was like he was like, no, s im also against that. But im talkinalg about andabou the First Amendment. Its the First Amendment for a reason. All these argumentth t s and i think that thats why i think its great to have more candidates in. The race i think its its a lot more substantive to watch sometimerace as on tv. What do you think, michael . Will you be voting the election . You need to get an address. Its going to be tough. Yeahwill yyou need, as a as a h, im just living from box to. Yeah, but, you know, you dont t need. Thank you, tyrus, last word to you. Im just glad to see carville. Yeah, like, that guys just so. Entertaining i just. I just want to record him every day, every time he talks on tvto. Its like cool hand luke, the Stage Play Everybody in droves. We got us a problem here where gommunicate. Yeah. Like his everyday life must betr soobleunicatio. Honey, im home. Im going to give you a backrubo. G its like hes Likeiv A Hillbilly Version of voldemort by harry potter. Die. That was titillating. All right, lets move on, shall we . Up next. He hung his head in shame for calling women names. How many times have you tried to clean a stubborn mess but end up with no success . You need is the all new waterproof ruby horsepower, the new cordless and rechargeable power scrubber that cleans and easier guaranteed watch breakdown of in greece is no match. It easily blasts away dirt and grime in no time. No power comes from our rotating brushes spinning at 350 rpm. The incredible torque fights, calcium, soap, mildew, mold and more. Forget harsh chemicals with just plain water. 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Call coventry today at 800 7986 200 or visit Coventry Direct comm. Should he apologize like a groveling was . Oh, send me a whole segmentle sg devoted to la times writer ben bolte, who wrote a commentarmey last friday referring to Womens College basketball y sexistand allegedl terms. He called the Lsu Lady Tigers villains and dirty debutantes. Is that worse than lady tigers . I referred to the ucla as milking cookies, but after m much hue and cry yesterday, he tweeteduc a long overdue apology. Yete tweete he wrote the Arte On Friday and apologized on monday. Thats long overdue, he said in part. Words matter. I hate that phrase. As a journalist, noi one should know this more than met,. N and yet i have failed miserably in my choice of words. I tried to be clever Usingy Alliteration while not understanding the deeply offensiv b e connotation. The co you know, our society has hannd to deal with so layers of misogyny, racism and negativity. I know understand that i terribly missed the mark. I will do mucl h better. I i hate that, too. I am deeply sorry. Well i havent heard such a boot licking since i hired jesse to lick my boots. I mean, he does a great jobto. But hes so loud when hes licking my bootos. Cats. All right. Stupid words. , but the apology is actually more offensive now. Yes, maybe. Okay, so i always, always stand by that. You know, if you do try, if a its mistake, then you your whole career shouldnt be over because of it. Definitely shutakeaybet out. He was he was trying to be, like, funny and clever. T i think it was a messwa because i had to google dirty w tom. Oh, dont. Which i would not recommend at home because. Recom yeah. All that came up were apparently some adult films that Cammey Debutaale Out in the and nineties and then a book from amazo on and i quote the dirty debutantes. It just you think im about to be done talking here i wont be a victorian medical examination short. Hmm. Never wanted to read something less. Yeah. Oh, but also like that. Like the editor too. Maybe we could have caught Something Like that. So cou i feel like maybee edit he submitted it thinking the editor would at it. I dont know. I meanor it, its definitely an embarrassing situation and but i think that, like, makes him like a terrible human being. You know what, tyrus . You what i love is that the people that were wringing their hands pointe. Reg Whod Thy Deeds are the name of a series. T dirti didnt know that out to, but somehow, like jim acosta did, i mean, it says a lot more about the people that are upset. Wel d l yeah, they have reallyhave Good Research teams. He was trying to paint a picture like the the he establishment of lsu versus, you know, these Youns Tryig Girs and missed horribly. But you would only salsu buy that that is such a random. Yeah. You wouldnt put dirtyn debutantes together unless you knew what it was. Debu not Something Like oops, you just came up with that terms that just to mean a specific thing. I think a lot of it was taking shots. The head coach of lsut because shes taking shots at the media. Yeah Washington Post has been trying to write some hit piece on her and talking about howitee shes distraction to the game and all this other kind of stuff and all this drama. Ion to gam he only apologized because he said i, i wanted things to settle hee down at the beging of this first sentence, like i was waiting a couple of days for things. You thought you got away with it. And then they came out and obviousl you goty his job ws on the line because no one says i will. The only time a guy says i will be better one his girls leaving him or two, hes about to get fired. Yeah, he was only trying to exactly. Thats the only time. Its. Its the. Its. Thats it. Yeah. Thats good. Thats the. The bread of that apology was words matter, and i promise to do better. Its disgustinf g loftis. I you know, its terrible writin ig, but i dont know, i. I look at this and i go likeu i dont understand why this guy is being dragged. Right. Thats all. Its alleing beyond me. And i hope we all give generously to his go. Ht i me for his upper lip. We oh, come on. We got to raise. Oh, yeah. Also, he also needs a spp. Alss. Yeah, you know what . Like, why are you evenu Ev Apologizing . He might have a like, some people have to apologize because they got, like, mouths d, right . You wouldnt know that all this is like hes complaining, like the Womens Basketball team. The like the dirty debutantes. Dont. Yeah, dont google do her dirty debutantes. You want to Definitelyle Tha Dit here at work. So i like part two is the one and three and four. Yeah but like arent arent womens to be just as tough as guys that the whole thing dont need to be like, oh sorryd i said something bad about the girls because you can handle imt they should go over and kick his. That is a great point. If this were Dey Shoulo Heathers would do what an apology. Nobody would. Nobody would even think about it. But they have two White Knight Womet N who supposed to be you go, girl, tough chicks. Right. So thats where i would push back. I understand the coach if she thinks some of the feelings were hurt of the players. Thats job and her duty to protect them and stand up for them. But the counterargumenr job antu you just alluded to, that she said, and i quote, im not not allut she sag to let you atg people. And there were some things in thigointos commentary, you gg isnt that kind of sexist that you be offended by as a woman . It was so sexist and they dont even know it. M so my point is, as a woman, ifaa im not offended, dont tell me i shouldnt be. Yeah, i think i am. Thenllif maybe theres some truh to it. And she said, its so sexist. They dont even know , maybe even intentionally mean to. I dont know. But if you likt intene, heard the phrase he he never knowing where he heard it. He didnt google it though. He just put it in thet article. Right. Well, i think we it t actually had no real impact on the story. Isnt that the medias job . Yes, our is not to have any impact. All right. Coming up, white prisoners are suing for a Solar Eclipspick Viewin Ag Obsession saves us soy much time, it makes it t really and seamless. It can order everything it can order everything you need, slap the label the box and its ready to go. Our cost for shipping like were cut in just like that. Go to ship station. Com slash tv and get two months free. What is circle . Surplu energys fuel you need toe plane circled is the energy that gets you to the next level. Circle is which you for good like tosses lemons away. So available at walmart and Drink Circle Icon at Consumer Cellular you get the same exact coverage as the largest carriers for up to half the price. Thats amazing and Great CustomerService Based here in america. Thats amazing. No hidden fees, no contracts and free activation. 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Six new york inmates are suing so they can watch the Solar Eclipse next are. They argue a lockdown violates their constitutional rightsal rg by them to take part in a religious event. Yetht one is a baptist musli, another is a muslim seventh dayn adventist and an atheist. So they say the Solar Eclipsheist isy sae as a religi. Look, i agree with them, greg. I 1,000 agree with them. They have every right to sue to see that and they should sue. And if i was the warden, i would get a postponement. Two days after the eclipse. And then when they get their little court dat we, aftef when theyre going to court the days. You know what . Ive had a change of heart. You guys a see the eclipse in 50 years. You know whats next . Heather . They could actually say that aoy rainbow is a religious experience. Come on. T maybe trans. What about Groundhog Day or Groundhog Day . The groundhog rises. Maybe. Well, in the bible, there are actual passages that refer an eclipse type of phenomenon during jesuss crucifixion. In islam, you have prophet muhammad. Signs dies. What about the Atheists Solard S Eclipse as well . That is a good point becaused the atheist actually wase granted permission a month ago. Sot wa just based on that alone, like arent you supposed to apply past t . Gre were not supposed to haveg Hav Rights In Prison but they because they ruled that the atheist can watch it not due to any religious beliefs. They kind of got grant access. I think, you know, when is what you get in this debate. Theyve already won. Especially when we think about you, loftis. I meanady wo, they you you where are you going to watch the eclipse . What t what train are you going to be on . Ill probably just behinu Beyod Geleven hanging out with my girl. You still with bertha . Berthare you with left . Oh, yeah. Yeah, i got. I got an i got new girl right. New girl. Brand new box. Were in. Nice. Okay. This. Gink they should they should tell the prisoners, hey, we want you won your casey should. Were going to got a oh, were having a problem with the doors. We cant get the doors open and then give the guards, like, a Dimmer Switch and they just dim the lights lik ande lightse, its so cool, so awesome. And then bring the light liksnd back up. Wo thatd be great. You know what . Ul i the atheist. St i cant believe they let him on religious grounds. Nds that yes. You believe in nothing. Just close your eyes and pretend its aoundn. There you go. Cat, i have to say, its nice to see inmates interested in Something Else besides Writin Ig You fan mail. Intere yeah, i. Im surprised. Now that i think about it, that inmates dont. Theres a lot more lawsuits coming from inmates in general o because i feel like they have a lot of time. Right. And at the law, they. Yes. And they also like theyre not in there because theyre afrai n to question authority. Impro i guesres im surprised they the i if i were in prison, id sue people. Thats all i would do i would do. That is what we do is game to some extent youl woulddl gee of them and what else am i doing. Allergic to doing that now. Yeah. Thats why dont i sue people,ge everybody. Yeah, thats true. Were not doing it. Im an notd. From the audience here tonight, by the way. By the way, to you. R point, ifpn they see the eclipse and their eyes are injured. O yes. Have you been watching an eclipse in your eyes were injured, but thats goin ag to e on fox news in two weeks. You. Bars in parts. Lar oh, were looking for one in Solar Eclipse injuries. I hope they call it dumby ca syndrome like i stared at the sun. Youve beetn told that yourev a baby. Dont stare at the sun so in eclipse donte look at it. Soy so everyone looks at it. I feel like its fair. Yeah. And whenati feel you. When youre doing the commercial, you dont do it in the camera. Youre like, were you injured in the eye . to thyou you need to call. Do we cheat him . And how. Yeah. Oh, near squatters. At are try to mask their deceit with a burger. With a burger. Se e . So do you thinkingord a im thinking about our far. Hot air balloon ride, swim with elephantsor, put thayment. Weve three, four, two, safari. Great question. Great question. Like everything takea planning for. What am i trying to dump him what am i trying to dump him on a ranch bran in montana with horses . Lets take a look at thoseke wea scenariolts. Jpmorgan Wealth Management the i got th and tools like wealth plan to help keep you on track when youre planning for it. All the answer is jpmorgandealda Wealth Management. I got this thousandsh, onlina for only 41 on deal. Sold online auctions since 2009. Thiss ninten playstation five sn only 0. 50. This ipad pro sold 20. I for less than 34. And this Nintendo Switch sold for less than 20. I got this Kitchenaid Stand Mixer for only 56. 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Sl or fast heartbeat or abnormal movements seek help for fever, stiff muscleees problems, thinking or sweating. Common side effects include inflammation of the nose and Throatask Insomniyoura and sleepiness. Ask your doctor for to are you want to see gutfeld in new york . Come here part of our studio audinow one will include a botte of new gen x thermo x. Our most powerful fat incinerator ever. Absolutely free five. No worries. Squatters show fast receipt because its squatters. Michael, im going to come to you first. Two alleged squatters in new york are suing the owners of the house they were living in after being kicked out claiming the are they have a lee and paid rent. Tow usinre using an uber eats a receipt for shake shack 25 bill. Thats proof of the move that established to move in dates. Do they have a legal right to live there because theyre shaking them down over their shac tre bk oh oh oh . I cant follow that. Do you a lot of things i, i want this to work so bado ba because if they do get away with this, thats a whole thats my new retirement the plan for me. Yeah. Im going to order some burger king, have i allt delivered to a little gentleman by the name of gutfeld out to prove that io live there. Im going to take what you got. Im going to take elon musksd rocket. Im going to have it all and im going to pay my lawyers who got me off the the thing and were doing here. We do we louie. And im just going to giveure them a receipt from Burgerr Ki King to establish royalty. You know what lee zeldin should do . He should order chick fil a at the governors mansion. Yeah. This governo is go in and get rd of kathy hochul. No, he goes. If he did that, he will get shot as a home invader. A yes. S i dont call them squatters. Theyre home invaders. The theyre stealing your property, itstroying your property slowly ,and theyre living in it. So he bought it. But this is how bad it is. Anyone who saw that receipt should have Laughe Should and jt said, you got 10 minutes, man. Im getting a hose. Like, get out of here. But we see that and there is somebody that has so left some Left Progressive person will say, yeah, that does prove that the y they live there. That does. And the fact that you made him prove it is racist. Mmhmm. So, you know, and they need their space and theire spac safe space just happens to be your address. So if you can please let thes tm get back to their day, sir. And the person only is the bad one. So i think you hav hae to walk in there. You have to walk in the house, tripping falls like, oh, theyre attacking me,. And do something to get them out of your house. Yeah, it kills me. Okay, heather, the law is that if you have to if you occupy a property for 30 days, youre. Did you have. Did we ever know . No one taught us this . P in like, how . Like, how did this slip in new york city really screwed up . But its not just new york. Its other. Jusits other places. Yeah, but if you look at new york state, i dont think its the norm if that makes you feel any better, because new york state, for example, you haveree to stay there for t ten years, which is a really long time before the law makes t really difficult to kick you out of the house. But new york cityor said, oh, no, you only have to stay there for 30 days. Ba you camp out in the backyaryd the basement, the attic. And 30 days is enough not to say that the home insurance, but trd 30y to it really diffict for the legal homeowner to be remo to remove you from the house. Thats absuroud. I imagine if you knew this ten or 15 years ago. Could like you could have lived anywhere you wanted because youre tiny. Youd slipvee you living, livina wall. I feel like ive been living in manhattan too long. On i look at the story and allall i can think about is how did you get Shake Shacink delivered for 2527 . What did you get . Like you get a diet coke and thats it . Yeah. With that, with everything, the deliverye . , by the way,livey they probably dont tip. Yeah. I want to know who this person is that Delivehey Ly Dp and r t. You probably didnt tip, but yeah, its also i, i wouldt never do it. Its pathetic. Like, how could you feel okay with tha itsn hot . Dont know. H i guess people dont have shame or whatever, but they are criminals. I just dont feel i should be able to do that. But also the fact that they know the ins and outs of all s are aletle thing little Record Keeping of shake shack. I dont know. I feel like if they applie to d ad to literally anything else, then maybe they might be useful. Mm. Well be right. Your yard is your sanctuary. Well, you should feel. See, no ones talking about the. They need th back first and you, its got to be grass. And you, its got to be grass. Its an evolutionary mix of seed and fertilizer that grows grass two times faster to sereedom, e the lawn,o you a stronger lawn. That sounds military to me. I smell it. 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