>> and then all of a sudden picks up a picture and smiles gloriously. >> that's gaia. that was the 30th of august. i'd only had her for about a week and a half. she looks so different. >> shows me a picture of gaia the cat with this really happy, loving smile. it was such an odd moment. i just remember stopping and it took me a while to take it in. you're kind of detached. >> from? yeah. >> your mom. >> it's kind of a coping mechanism, i think. >> right now after the denial, after the years have passed? >> i miss her.