was making jokes about, i don't need him anymore >> reporter: the biggest burden, dad. even though men think they are doing their fair share, only 60% of bread-winning moms surveyed said they were satisfied with the division of housework. women like katherine, a bread-winning mom from chicago told us, we finally hired a cleaning lady once a month. i figured it was cheaper than divorce. ashley from colorado told us, she and her husband are always fighting over child care. >> i feel like i have to call in a favor or ask my husband to help with the kids. >> reporter: there can also be an overwhelming sense of responsibility and financial stress. >> it's scary. everything rises and falls on you. the kids' ability to have a college that they want to go to, your home, the car you have. >> reporter: the benfors think of themselves as a team. pioneers on a new frontier. and they're committed to making it work. linsey davis, abc news, boston.