within eight months, i was arrested for manufacturing. ♪ and i remember specifically in one conversation where he was, like, i'm glad you're in jail because i'm hoping that you'll change your life and get your life together. and i never forgot him saying that to me. and so because of that, i've been sober for 13 1/2 years. even though i finally got sober and i changed my life and i became the mother that i was supposed to be for him, it didn't save him from relapses and continuing to do the things that i had taught him. and that -- that was devastating