Hello. Mrs. Obama these are big girl chairs, arent they . Shonda they are very big girl chairs. [cheering] mrs. Shonda they are very big of these people. I know, ladies [cheering] and a few good men as well. Whats up . [laughter] shonda i thought we would sit and have a conversation. We should just chat. Ive brought some guidelines because i know we an hour, and we want to be useful with our hour. So, you are very you are married to a very nice man. Mrs. Obama that guy. We are huge and talk about you. You have heard the bio, but this is Michelle Robinson obama. For the last three years, she has been serving the country. Before you are in the white lady, you were a successful attorney as well as dean, administrator, primary breadwinner of your household. Shonda she is brilliant, powerful, impactful, successful. What was it like to make that sacrifice to give that up . Mrs. Obama dean, administrator,y breadwinner of your household. That is a good question. Actually, that is when i am taking the time this year to do, is reflect on that. The truth is for the last eight years, and i will say 10 because it is not just the two terms, but the two years of running required in this country to become president. It has been a decade of being shot out of a cannon. There has really been literally no time to think about feelings. You think of those last eight years, you are trying to develop your initiatives, or at least i am maybe. You were not doing that the last eight years, everybody here. I was trying to develop my initiatives, i was trying to make sure that the girls lives were normal. I was cheering to figure out what door led to what room. You know, living in the white house is doing what probably everybody in this room is doing, juggling careers, trying to be relevant, making sure your marriage is intact and that your kids are healthy, but you are doing it under the harshest, brightest light there is, with people judging and supporting and judging and supporting along the way. Doing it under the harshest, so, it probably doesnt feel any different than what most people go through. You know, it is that constant balance, that constant feeling like you are always maybe not doing enough, and could be doing more. There are also those moments of doubt, you know, are you good enough . Are you smart enough . Are you being relevant . But you get through, and hopefully we got through over the last eight years, and made the country proud. [cheering] shonda it is a little bit to me like you are working a pretty sweet job, only 365 days a year. Mrs. Obama with no salary. Shonda there is a difference in the sea suite thing. Mrs. Obama no salary, no budget. No policy authority in any way. Anyway, you were saying shonda but you are working a real job. Suddenly after all that time, it just stops. For me, i am a workaholic, and a lot of people in here love what they do. What was it like to go from that pace to nothing . Mrs. Obama its good. Its really good. [laughter] mrs. Obama maybe in a year i will be chomping at the bit. I dont know if i call myself a workaholic. I like chilling. It is good to have control over your daytoday life. For eight years, our lives really werent our own. You are moving from crisis to crisis. We look at sadly what happened in las vegas. My heart goes out to the victims and the families. Sadly, that becomes too much part of the job of becoming commanderinchief, is sadly overseeing that kind of loss, and really not having a solution to offer families when you come when you comfort them, because we are not at that point yet. That is the kind of stuff you are dealing with on a daytoday basis. You open up the newspaper, and everything on it is your husbands responsibility, and indirectly yours. I am kind of good chilling for a little bit. [laughter] mrs. Obama but that is the work we are working on right now, figuring out what that next chapter is going to be. Definitely at my age and baracks age, we are not ready to stop. Shonda right. [applause] mrs. Obama we have to figure out what that new chapter looks like, and how you continue to be relevant and have an impact in this new position. Shonda what do you do after this . You can kind of do anything. Or does it feel like there are only specific things you can do . Mrs. Obama no, it feels like things are pretty wide open. For the last eight years, we had a standard of ethics, and there were things we wouldnt do. There were a lot of constraints under the obama administration. There was a certain expectation. There was a lot that we could do could not do and didnt do because of our respect for the position, and what it means to the country to have a commander in chief that actually upholds and honors the office. [applause] mrs. Obama so definitely life is freer now. One of the things that all president s do is they have the opportunity to develop a president ial library, which is not just an archive, a place to go to see my dresses dont worry, they will be there. I keep telling barack, no one is going to come to hear about his policies, they will go to see my dresses. And then they will go into the room where the policy stuff is. Anyway, we are working on that right now. The obama president ial center will be the base from which we will develop the next set of policies and programs. In fact, we are hosting our first summit at the end of the month in chicago to do focus grouping around Program Ideas and pulling things together. We will continue to do work on education, girls leadership and training. Barack and i want to be involved in developing the next generation of leaders. We dont want to be the folks that dont go away and dont give up our seats and make sure other young people have the knowledge and expertise to take our places. That doesnt just happen for many. Young people dont know how to get in politics. They dont know how to be community leaders. They dont know what Community Organizing is. That is not just true for young people in the united states. If you look at Young Leaders in asia, africa, around the world, part of what we want to do is be a place where these young people can get training and become the next leaders of the world. Shonda i think that is amazing. Mrs. Obama we are excited about it. It is important. Shonda also the idea of passing it on. Mrs. Obama absolutely. I always say this it is difficult. Politics is one of those things where you see it a lot. People hold on maybe a little too long. If you hold onto long if you hold on too long and you dont make way there are so many new , fresh ideas and perspectives coming along. Sometimes we lose sight. When you are living in the white house, or serving in congress and the senate, it is a unique bubble of isolation. You do not get to have the same kind of interaction, and therefore there are some parts of you that do lose touch. So it is important to make way for those new voices and new ideas and new perspectives so that the country and world continues to evolve. That is not necessarily how a lot of people practice politics. A lot of people treat those seats like they belong to them, and they dont. Those seats belong to the country. [applause] mrs. Obama it is important to know when it is time to move on and find another way to have impact. Thats what ive got to say. [laughter] shonda i want to talk a little bit about empowerment. You and i have had this conversation a lot. I spoke about it a little bit this morning but not in depth because i was saving this. A lot of women i know, and a lot of women you know, and a lot of women in this room talk about something called impostor syndrome, how they feel like they dont belong in the room, how they dont raise their voices to be heard, how it is difficult for them. You and i are two people that dont feel like that. I spend a lot of time trying to figure out why i dont feel that way, and why you dont feel that way. What is it about you that feels comfortable in any room you are in an comfortable raising your voice . Mrs. Obama i cant say i have always felt that way. We have talked about that. It is something you grow into. There are definitely times when i was younger. It took some time to find that voice and live life and have those experiences where you fail, but you succeed. You try hard things, and you exercise bravery, and it works out. Or you get a seat at the table and you realize that the people around it are no smarter or better. A lot of that comes with life experience. That has definitely developed for me over time. Like you said, that is part of what we have been talking about and thinking about. How do we facilitate that in our young girls . What stands out . I think for me, one of the things was having parents, both mother and father, who always thought what me and my brother had to say was important. They made room for our voices at a very young age. I dont mean in any symbolic way. I just mean sitting at the dinner table and listening to what we have to say, and laughing at her jokes and allowing our opinions to come into the conversation, not always shushing us. Even when we did not say things as right or respectfully, because we were still learning how to do that. We were never told kids were supposed to be seen, but not heard. When i think about it it wasnt , just my mother and father, but my extended family too. I lived in a family that loved kids and loved the voices of children. When i think about what is sometimes missing for young girls, for example, is so early in our lives we are shushed. And not just directly shushed, but sometimes we are treated a little too preciously. We may have a father who loves us, but he treats us like a doll. They dont treat us like real beings and partners. When my father taught my brother to box at the age of seven, he bought me a pair of boxing gloves too. It was important that even though i had an older brother, we were on par. He had to learn how to box, so did i. If we were playing catch, i was going to be playing catch too. I was loved dearly by my father, but i was never so precious that he did not think i could be at the table. Those Little Things those small , things that we take for granted we think it is just enough to love a girl. No, you have to treasure a girl. You have to respect her and you have to give her power at a very young age, because she is not going to show up like that. Shonda that is part of what she is made of. That power is expected and part of her, versus be nice and be sweet. And it is ok to be angry. There are a whole set of emotions. We are afraid when our daughters show anger or discontent, or frustration. Cross your legs. There all these rules that slowly suffocate young girls. I dont think i had a lot of those boundaries. Once you get out in the world and get out of the comfort of your community, then you start getting the messages that try to shut you down. We all get those in very subtle ways. I called on those small cuts. I tried to explain this to my husband, to men all the time, that women are so vulnerable, some of the cuts are thin, like paper cuts, like some men oogling at your body on the street. Maybe that feels minor but that does something to you. Or the teacher that told you you were not good enough, or you never got called on, small cuts. Then there are deeper cuts, like you were actually physically abused. When you think of the percentage of women that suffer from some kind of physical or Emotional Abuse in their lifetime, those cuts are deep. When you are definitely mistreated in the workplace, and you have to put up with ugly talk and bad behavior, and you just silence yourself, those are cuts. They last and they leave scars. Oftentimes the ability to push through those cuts is because of that foundation we had coming up, that whole notion that i know i am better than how i feel right now because somebody told me that a long time ago. Society certainly doesnt help. Shonda not with the images they put out. Note the messages you are given. Not with the messages you are given. I was told i was too loud in class, that i had too many questions that i raised my hand , too much, which is ridiculous given that girls dont ask enough questions. That was my problem, i asked too many questions. For children, to tell someone they are too curious, they are trying to learn too much, is appalling. I think for a lot of kids, there is an age at which that silencing starts to happen. Mrs. Obama the thing we cannot forget, and this is what makes me sad about what happens in this country around education and what we do to our children, is the children know when people dont believe in them. When they are not being invested in. We try to pretend like the inequalities in education, that somehow kids are shuffling through kids know when things are different for them. You know . They know when they are being quieted, when they are not being treated fairly. Shame on us as adults to not know when they have a bad teacher or when someone says something crappy about them, that somehow they dont know. They know. Second grade,y as when i was in a bad classroom. I knew as early as second grade. This teacher does not even care about us. I had a parent that fought for me. When i think about the kids that dont have people fighting for them, they see what i saw. That happens a lot to minorities, to women. Those are the little cuts that i mentioned. They start as early as seven and eight and 10. We have to be cognizant. We cant look at women and go, why didnt you raise your hand in a meeting . You want to say, dont you see all these cuts on me . You look at my scars. You wonder why i am not brave and cant speak up . We can pretend we are not hurting our kids. We do it. But i think you and i were fortunate early on to have people that loved and believed and supported us. We have to do the same for kids in our lives as much as we can. Shonda i think the more you step into those roles and the more youre in those rooms, the less difficult it becomes. Even when you make mistakes, there is a space for you. It is hard to find a place for yourself when you dont believe those rooms exist for you in the first place. Mrs. Obama it is true. A lot of power and bravery is practice. Some of that is taking the risk to trying to be at the table, and when you are at the table, taking that first risk to open your mouth and maybe be rejected. As women we dont want to feel that reduction. Rejection. I see that in men. I see that in my husband, my brother. They fail all over the place and they are good with it. I was wrong all over the place. You know . We as women feel like we have to be perfect all the time before we can even step in. It is hard to lean in if your re worried about not getting things right. I think we worry too much about that. Shonda do you think women in general have less chances to fail . You fail once, people start labeling you faster than they label a man ever. Mrs. Obama absolutely. That is true for women for minorities. The bars are different. We experienced that over the last eight years. I talked about on the campaign trail, the bar just kept moving. You meet it, then the bar when a ould change. We are seeing that now quite frankly. The bar has [laughter] [applause] mrs. Obama i mean, that bar is going places. It is amazing to watch. But i want women to watch this. I want you all to pay attention, because this is what happens when we dont stand up. We give our seats up to someone who is supposed to be the stereotyped notions of what power and success looks like. We sat at tables with people like that. You want to talk about shonda imposter syndrome. Mrs. Obama you want to talk about imposter syndrome . I have seen imposters at a lot of tables. When youre at the table and when you realize, oh, you are a fool. [laughter] [applause] mrs. Obama and i am worried about raising my hand . I have been at so many tables with so many fools. [applause] mrs. Obama but shame on us, if we sit by and let an imposter talk us down. Shame on us. When you know what is right, and then you dont say anything you see wrong happening, and you sit by quietly because you are afraid to fail that is what i want to challenge us as women to be. To speak up in all of the tables we are in. If we dont speak up, our voices are never involved in the process of problem solving, and we dont get to the right answers without our voices. Shonda do you do this for the women you work around . Who you work with . The younger women or the women mrs. Obama oh my gosh, we have these conversations all the time. Shonda we do too. Mrs. Obama i have a heavily female staff. We run things here. Guys ur guys the poor at our table. You still see it. I spend a lot of time mentoring, coaching women in our office, even in the west wing. There were still women who complained about not being included, but werent necessarily willing to push to get in. I am constantly telling young women to speak up, to talk. Dont waste your seat at the table, and if you are scared to use your voice, you have to let someone else in that will use it, because we cannot afford for you to be afraid to fail. It is a waste of thoughts. But you also have to create the environment where people feel comfortable. And that is what i know that our environments do. Shonda i try hard to make sure the women who work there if i say, what do you want to be to our young writers . A lovely young black woman, really talented, she said she hopes to be a coproducer on someones show. I stopped her in the hallway and i said, dont ever say that out loud to someone ever again. When someone asks you what you want, you say, i want my own show. That is how you get something. It is that fear i think that happens. But what if that doesnt happen . I said, it is never going to happen if you dont say it out loud. Mrs. Obama men dont even ask that question, what if it doesnt happen . I would not say all men, but the that a lot of men dont ask that question. What if it doesnt work out . That is a behavior of our gender. Shonda i think men just know or feel comfortable just leaping. Mrs. Obama that is how they socialize. You are supposed to compete. You are going to lose. If we dont even play games the other thing i realized when i was younger, sports even though i am a closeted jock, that is not something that was available to girls in my generation. There were sports, but title vii had not done its job in the way it had for my girls generation. There is a practice you get in competing and playing and losing and recovering from it. Trying something onstage or competing alone. I think boys get to practice. They practice it a lot more. My brother, who was a basketball player, competed every saturday. Instead of being on the court, where was i . I was hitting on the bleachers with the other girls cheering. Those were opportunities that i missed to practice competing and loss, the whole gamut. Shonda Billy Jim King is according to statistics that the more women that occupy high level roles in Companies Say they competed in a team sport, which makes a big difference. I played the oboe. [laughter] mrs. Obama very competitive instrument. Shonda i was in the marching band. Mrs. Obama you are carrying your oboe, ripping it up. Shonda you know, get involved in something. What do you think makes this time in life for young women different from even just 10 years ago . For your girls. I feel like they have a different view on the world, a different method in terms of how they work than we have. It is the idea that gen x, they work in a different way. What do you think they have to teach us . Mrs. Obama oh gosh, i think this generation, because of social media, the internet, there are positives and negatives to it, and trust me, i have my issues with technology and how it just sort of the sucks the life out of kids in some way, shape or form, but i also see kids are more exposed to more people and more cultures. I think they are more open in ways. I think that they are less tolerant of obvious in equities. In equities. I think that this generation will look at what is happening now in the world and they will say, this does not feel right because this is not what i was taught. They are looking at the struggle of values as, do what i say, not what i do. I think this generation of kids that have been taught to probe and think for themselves, you know have been raised with an openness. Many of the young people today only know barack obama as their president and what that standard felt like. And what kind of messages were being talked about. Under hope andly possibilities and options and opportunity and creating more space, so i think i think they will be less tolerant. I think they will feel some of what is happening now as intrinsically not what they were taught. So i think in that way they give me hope, so i think that they are going to, when they start stepping into power, they will come to a lot of these issues with a new way of seeing the world and viewing relationships, and their connection to people. So i am optimistic in that way. But i also feel like i do not even know what technology is going to mean for them. I think i am not even in a position to know how they will be different, because i cannot relate to so much of what my kids do and how they act. And what it is doing to their brains. So i have a hard time knowing what it is going to mean. Shonda is a bring in the world is it bringing the world closer, or are you more isolated, or are you more connected . I cannot figure it out. Mrs. Obama how do you do with your kids and technology . Shonda i do pretty well. My little ones do not really have technology. Mrs. Obama you just wait. [laughter] shonda but the 15yearold, she has a phone and ipad and they are always with her when she is doing homework, sometimes she is studying with a friend on it and sometimes she is not. And every year i do something called amish summer, when i turn off all the electronics in the house. Mrs. Obama you are so cool. Horrible. They hate you. [laughter] shonda there is a big dramatic rush and i tell them to go outside and figure out what the world looks like and there is a week of mourning. Week of serious mourning mrs. Obama they hate you. Shonda yes. And then i come home and my daughter has built a city out of cardboard boxes and it is fine. Mrs. Obama it is a drug almost, it is hard to withdraw. It is like how it is with parents. Are the days when the phones gone are the days when the phones would ring, remember that, in your house . You would pick up and is somebody would say, this is blank and im called to speak with melia. And you think, this is the person who is talking to my daughter, boy girl or whatever. , but now, there are friends i do not even know that they have. Shonda yes. Mrs. Obama and i am shocked whey they say im going over such and suchs house. Who is that . My good friend. I have never heard that name before. [laughter] mrs. Obama she is one of my best friends. That happens so much. They look at me like im crazy. I do not know this little girl. Shonda that happens to me all the time. Remember the phone cord in the kitchen mrs. Obama we would stretch it out. We had a long one. Shonda your mother could hear everything. And would know how long you are on the phone. You cannot make crazy, dark plans because no matter what code you are speaking in they knew it. Mrs. Obama now you come in and they have that thing, the computer open, and it is always homework. I am like i do not believe that. ,you just slammed it down because you are doing homework. Open it up. I do not even know how to police that. Let me see. I am pressing buttons and i realize i do not have their password. This happened to me before when i was regulating. I realized i could not get in. Trying to be all tough. Give me your password. [laughter] mrs. Obama and malia, she almost laughed at me because i was trying to be tough. It makes parenting more difficult. Shonda it is scary. I do not know. Mrs. Obama i think they have to be more this is what i tell my girls, because i cannot monitor everything you do, that puts unfairness on you to be smarter. I know, because with their frontal lobes all open, and that is true. [laughter] mrs. Obama they are just not that bright, they can be so intellectually bright, connecting dots, but then they will get there, but they are not there yet. It takes a while. But in light of that reality, what we know about Brain Development and all that, we give them computers and they are sent into the world on their own without any i do not know whether it will make it more independent, does it make them a lot of the stuff i feel like we will see. Shonda we are all in a great experiment. Mrs. Obama that is comforting. [laughter] shonda it is not helping. Ok. I just moved to a Company Called netflix. Mrs. Obama uh, yeah [applause] shonda a little bitty company. They are pretty good. They have an idea that hard work is not what matters, it is the quality of the work, not the quantity. They do not need to see you from her at work from 6 00 a. M. To midnight they want you to come , in with quality work, which is pretty controversial. I like it, but it is controversial. What do you think of it . What does that mean for you . Mrs. Obama i think it is a great idea. It makes so much sense. We do this because that is one of the problems i think with the education system, it is not individualized. It is hard to do when you are educating millions and millions of kids, but we see it in our own kids. They learn differently, different paces, it does not make one smarter or brighter. It is one of the things that keeps more girls out of it, because girls learn differently, and who cares how fast you get it done as long as you get to the right answer. And i think work operates under that same theory, that time in somehow means something. We have all worked with people, right . We have worked with people. You know how people can be. You have seen people who can be at the office all day and get absolutely nothing done. [laughter] mrs. Obama they are there, they are showing up. But they are on their computer. And i found i was the most productive when i was in a flex situation, when i was the Vice President at the university of chicago hospital i had both kids, barack was in the senate. He was not home mostly during the week. My day, i got up at 5 00 in the morning to work out my my mother would come over. I had a babysitter that did not drive. You all can relate to this. I hired a babysitter that could not drive. [laughter] mrs. Obama how dumb was that . So i would work out, come back home, take a shower, mom would get the kids breakfast, i would get them in the car, we had two separate dropoffs. We were in the neighborhood where my job was and the girls school was. So the only reason this was possible. Get to the office, walk from the parking lot, because i had to park, then get work done in time for pickup to get out and go sit in a line, get them back home and come back to work. Then go back home for dinner. One of the things i told my boss, the president of the hospital, was do not check for me for needless meetings, i do not have time for that. I will be getting work done, but if you are looking for me to show up and a sit in meetings to make you feel good, i would i would like, i cannot do it. I am working my butt off, but if youre looking at me to look like the guys that are sitting next to me who either do not have kids, or have wives who do all this stuff, and you will measure me against this guy, you know. That was part of me using my voice, because i did not even take the job without the clarity and expectation that given where my life was, that they would get product, but in the way i delivered it and not in the way they thought it should be delivered. That was the first time i actually demanded flexibility and not a cut in salary, either. Because one of the things i learned, i tried the whole parttime thing, the flex thing where you basically just get gypped. You are working your but off butt off and you are doing the same with the babysitting costs, never again. I think it is a great idea and i think it is the future. And the only way that you are going to ensure that you keep quality women in, and it is not just true for women, but people who care about their families and family lives, at some point we have to create a different definition of what it means to be successful at work and i think netflix is doing a good job. [applause] mrs. Obama how do you feel about it . Shonda i thought it was wonderful. We are not under all the practices of the company, but the minute i read that, i thought, that is definitely something we are adopting. We have to figure out a way so people do not have to be on all the time. I told people they should not be on the phone after 7 00 and i do p. M. Not want to hear from them on weekends, so they should not feel like they needed to work on weekends. It is sanity. You have children. Mrs. Obama it is also a product of using your seat at the table. Because that is the other thing. There are women like us have leverage to do that. But the vast majority of women do not have the leverage to do that. You do not have a job that allows for flexibility, if you are a teacher, bus driver, and nurse where you are working a shift, it is harder to negotiate that. But for the women in the room who are in those seats and at those tables and talking about Human Resources and they are in the conversation, we need to be the ones making those arguments for the ones that do not. It is an obligation. You have an obligation if you have a voice, to speak up. Or give the seat up and let somebody who is going to do the fightng to fight the good have the seat. Shonda people say to me, we can have babies . So they come and they get pregnant and i do not fire them when they are pregnant, we have a party. It should be that way. I do not understand why people get punished for doing their work and getting pregnant at the same time. That happened a lot. Mrs. Obama it happens a lot. [applause] mrs. Obama because it was making those decisions . Because he was making those decisions . Shonda exactly. You can say two men, do you have kids . And they say yes. And they ask, how is the wife doing . And they say, she does not work. She stays at home the entire time. And then you say, think about that. Think about the options available for people. Mrs. Obama ok fellas, we are talking to you now. [laughter] mrs. Obama think about that. It is a whole range of things, but it is who is at the decisionmaking table. And i have done a lot of conversations over the past several months, and a lot of questions i get from organizations and industries that we are working on diversity, what do you recommend and the first thing i recommend is that you make sure the problemsolving table is diverse. You know, you are not going to there cannot be a room full of men who are going to come up with the right answers for how to create a Work Environment hospitable to women. Shonda and it cannot be a room full of women. Mrs. Obama the same is true. It is true for all of us. If we are trying to get anything done and we look around and we all look alike, and we are all sitting around the same table and we feel very comfortable with ourselves, we should question that. At any table that we are at. And we should be working actively to mix it up, so we are getting a real broad range of perspectives on every issue. But, shoot, i would see that in congress. One of the most interesting points, i told you about this, usually at the state of the union address, where you sit in the balcony and you are watching the state of the union, like you do shonda like you do. [laughter] mrs. Obama you see it on tv. I am in the room. But when you are in the room what you can see is the real , dichotomy, that on one side of the room it is a feeling of color almost. On one side of the room it is literally gray and white, literally, that is the Color Palette on one side of the room. On the other side there is yellows, blues, white and greens, physically there is a different color and tone. Because one side, all men. All white. On the other side, some women, some people of color, and whenever i was sitting i would always have a guest in the booth and i was only the most embarrassed at the beginning when people would say that, because i would say, is it just me . Am i looking at how Government Works . And people would look down and go, that looks good, that looks right. We are probably getting a lot done and we are doing it right, you know. I look and i go, no wonder. No wonder we struggle, no wonder people do not trust politics. [applause] mrs. Obama we are not even noticing what the rooms look like. But it is not just politics. I am sure we can go in any suite in this country and we would say the same thing happening. So until we are ready to fight for that, which means some people have to be willing to give up their seats to make room or you need to be ready to add more seats, we will, i think we will continue to struggle because if people have not had the experience of being other and out and you are trying to fix the problem for those folks, it is hard to come up with the right answer when you have not lived it. Shonda that is for sure. [applause] shonda you talk about inequality and education in the same way, people do not live it. They do not know what they are doing. I think everybody always talks about wanting to fix education in some way, and it feels like nobody knows what to do. And now we are under a governance where education is not being run by anybody that has a background in education. So [laughter] [applause] shonda what can we as, local people, you are in a School District and there are parents and you care about what is going on, what can people do on the ground . One small thing that would help fix schools, or help them in any way, or support them . Mrs. Obama that is tough. So there are two responses i have. The biggest change i think that we all can have as individuals is close up. We can impact our kids, our families, our kids classrooms more powerfully than we can change the system. Often times that kind of close , up power is not given its full sort of due and credit. People always think if i cannot make a big change, and it makes it feel like uh, as if these problems are not solvable, because no. What you have to do to change education . You have to have the right governor who cares about your education system, and you have to have enough money and resources, and you need to pay teachers. You have to vote. You have got to, you have to have a state legislature. A lot of people do not understand that education is a state issue. It is not who is in the white house, but in the statehouse that makes those determinations. So those are big things. And when you say that, people shut down and they glaze over because but that is really the answer, because the truth is, we know what good education looks like. A lot of our kids are getting a good education, so it is not like we do not know what it looks like and how much it costs. There is always a trip. Especially when i know what i am paying for my kids and we start secondguessing how much we should be paying for public education, that is part of the problem. You know . We are ok sending 30,000 a year for some kids, but we want to count pennies and talk about taxes when we talk about education for the vast majority of kids. We know what it takes. We know you have to pay teachers. We know that you have to value education with salaries and a dollars that will attract the best talent, we know that. So what can you really do . You can focus on your school and be involved. I know, i went to an inner City Public School and my mom was a stayathome mom, but she was involved in the ppa. A lot of the extra programs that we got involved with, if something was wrong there was a crew of mothers, probably only three of them, my mom, mrs. Johnson and one or two others and they would be at the school all in the principals face and they would be shaking stuff up. The three of them. They would be listening to what we had to say. So for a small circle of kids, when i was growing up there were who when i was growing up there were multiple age programs and they made sure that we got access to Community Colleges and we were Getting College courses in grammar school. I say this to say that this is the stuff that mothers did, just as parents, through the pta. They worked for the kids that did not have parents. It was not like they were just looking out for us, because my mother would say there are a lot of mothers who could not stay at home, so she was advocating for them. Do not underestimate the power of what you can do at a small level when you do not feel like you can change the big picture, because that is all we have. If we are not going to fix education, you need to really make sure that your kids are getting what they need and that the teachers are held accountable by someone. But it is difficult unless you impact the system. Shonda it is about showing up and having a relationship with the school. Mrs. Obama absolutely. Shonda however big or small. My mother did that too. I was in the suburbs. A very not brown school. I think my mother wanted to make sure that i was involved in things, so she took over the pta, and brownie troops. I did not even notice it. Mrs. Obama you did not even know they were cursing out the teachers and whatnot. [laughter] shonda no. My mother was like, i came up there, and i said, you did . High five. It was powerful. It helps. I feel like my mother did that thing where she paved the way for me to miss all the obstacles in my path. Mrs. Obama we talked about this too, that people overlook the thing that they have most power over. You know . I mean, i know so many people who will go to a protest and do Something Big on an issue, but they will not deal with it in their own home. You know . [applause] mrs. Obama it is one of those things where sometimes it feels easier to confront the big picture, right . Than address your husband or your father, or whoever. In the case of a woman, with a a right to choose or the decisions we want to make. Sometimes it feels easier to take on the big challenge, rather than confront somebody in your own face and a change their minds right then and there. And to me that is something that i am, you know, that i think we all have to explore a little bit. What makes us afraid to make a change in our own lives, in our homes, in our families . What makes it hard for us to disagree with those in our lives that are doing the wrong thing, but we will go out into the world and expect i would have this sometimes when i would do fundraisers for barack. There would be women who would upset with herly husbands position on this, this, or that. And i would be like, what is your has been doing . [laughter] [applause] mrs. Obama because for many of them, i knew their husbands were on the other side of the political issues. And i would like, you are asking and i was like, you are asking me what my husband is doing, because you do not want to confront your husband in your own house, and you do not agree with him politically. I agree with my husband politically, so i think it is something that we have to think about. Where are we willing to exercise our power . Where are we willing to take risks . What keeps us from, what are we really afraid of . Shonda that is our most valuable way of making change, people staring us in the face every day. Mrs. Obama i always say, i cannot walk into the room and change hearts and minds. People have given me compliments about speeches, i gave some passionate speeches in this election, this past election. But look at the outcome. [applause] mrs. Obama you know . I just think that me as a stranger, coming into lives, i can move people with my words, but if i do not know them and they do not know me, it is sort of like what we heard from renee you have to get up close to people, you have to be willing to be close. You cannot ignore the people who are right in your orbit. And think you can affect bigger change. That is why when i came into the white house and i said i was mom and achieve, the statement i was making was i cannot help any other kid until i make sure that minor good. Even, as first lady my very First Response ability was to make sure that my girls were sane, because i actually have control over my kids, they are my responsibility. What i feed to them, i have the opportunity to feed this stuff to them every day, i am the role model. So i have to do that right before i can tackle the bigger issue. That is my responsibility to get that right before i go out and try to change things. Shonda and be a role model for anybody else. Mrs. Obama if i am not that for my own girls. Shonda they are great girls. Mrs. Obama they are doing all right. Shonda they are great. Mrs. Obama thank you for that. [applause] shonda so far so good, everyone. That is how we feel is mothers. My mother still says that about me and craig. So far, so good. I am like, mom, i am first lady. Mrs. Obama i think i did ok. She is like, i dont know. [laughter] mrs. Obama still waiting to see. Shonda hoping i do not mess up. [laughter] shonda i want to do a lighting round of questions. What is your comfort food . Mrs. Obama anything salty. French fries, pizza, burgers. Even the vegetable lady, when i need comfort i will go to a chip. Shonda which, you work out all the time. Mrs. Obama i do. Shonda your idea of vacation is working out. That is not a vacation. Mrs. Obama it is. I need that chip. Shonda what does it give you . Mrs. Obama you know, at first it is just, it is that thing. I started working out hard. Because my husband worked out all the time and i was mad at him because he was always working out and i was with the kids. So i did it as revenge at first. [laughter] mrs. Obama i was like, ok, im working out too then. Which was a good motivation. And then after a while, i needed it. It made me feel better, physically, emotionally, it was meditative. It was and is, it just, it is just a place to release and to solely invest in me. Shonda centering. Mrs. Obama it is something women do not do. We take the thing just for me, for nobody else. I work out because it does not help malia, sasha, maybe i am serving as a role model but it is all about me and it feels good. We should find more things. For me it is working out. Maybe Something Else for somebody else. But for me, it is doing it for me exclusively. Shonda i think it is fantastic. If only i had time, if only i had time, because i am so busy thinking other things are more important. Mrs. Obama we do not prioritize ourselves and for me the workout, what i started doing with that, i started when i was an executive, i had to learn that i was realizing i would look at a year and i could easily give my time away to everybody else, you know, before i even gave it to me, or to my kids. Because people have schedulers, and they are coordinating things a year in advance and you are agreeing to things and you are not looking at how it impacts your daytoday life. What my habit is that i started and still doing now, at the beginning of the year we look at , a blank calendar at the beginning of the year and we put everything for the kids first, so that means potlucks, sporting events, parentteacher conferences, vacations, when they are on break, and that goes on there. Second is me, when do i want to work out, hang out with my girlfriends, when can i take a long weekend. Put that on there. When that is done, Everything Else can come around that. Shonda genius. Mrs. Obama it forces you to say no, because you already blocked out the time. No, busy that we can, doing doingy that weekend, something with my kids. If we do not do that we wind up always giving that time away to somebody, or we feel guilty about saying no. That is a little thing i do. Shonda isnt that good . A clear layer he of priorities. Even if youre just looking at the week that way. I like it. Lightning round. Shonda what are you reading . Mrs. Obama i read commonwealth. And i reread catcher in the rye. I had a niece who was reading it. I read it right before i saw you. I find sometimes i will reread the things the kids are reading, sort of like knowing what is on their mind. I just recently reread grapes of wrath, which seems interestingly applicable to these times. So things like that. You know, i can read song of solomon again and again. Shonda that book is beautiful. Mrs. Obama my favorite of all time. And i am reading my book, chapters of my book that i am working on. Shonda going over and over. Mrs. Obama over and over again. [applause] shonda how is it going . Mrs. Obama going ok. I have never written a book before and i am working with a great collaborative team. It has been therapeutic for the reasons i said earlier, because i really realized how i had not had time to reflect on the past 10 years, and i find that there are big events that i have no memory of. Shonda wow. Mrs. Obama i find we have to talk with other people. I will have a picture and i look and i go, what was that . [laughter] mrs. Obama where was i . I do not remember. People will tell me stories, do you remember when the pope said this . I met the pope . When did that happen question ppen . Big things, you know. That is how big the rush of experience is, or at least was for me, that it was like a thing after a thing, a big thing after a big thing, and you get to the end of the week and i would have a friend say, that was a lovely dinner, and i am like what dinner . The state dinner. Oh man, that was tuesday . I forgot all about that. This is giving me a chance to look back and feel it. Shonda and pull it all in. Mrs. Obama yes. The process feels good. Shonda that will be a good book to read. Mrs. Obama i hope people read it. Shonda when is it coming . Mrs. Obama about a year. This time next year. Shonda what do you wish women would do with their time . Mrs. Obama invest in themselves. You know, i wish more women would find ways to put themselves higher on their priority list. [applause] shonda yeah. What quotes do you live by . Or is there one . Mrs. Obama do unto others. We are our brothers and sisters keepers. That is the one thing that would drive me through these eight years. If we could just, again i think it was said earlier, if we could just see the humanity in one another. The beauty of the position i had was i got to see the humanity of the beauty of the position i had was i got to see the humanity of people, even people who do not agree with us, who are on a different side of the issue, because we got to be up close to people in a way that most people do not. If we could just operate with a level of intimacy, and give one another the benefit of the doubt. If we just try to figure out, why do you feel that way . Why are you angry . What are you afraid of . As opposed to pointing and blaming. We are not that different. Um, so, i tend to think about that when i get frustrated or i get impatient, what is the thing that keeps me from going low. I have to remind myself, even when i do not agree with people, that is somebodys mother, somebody is acting from a base of fear maybe i do not understand. I have to try to work to tap into that, so that i am not judging. So that i do not reach the wrong conclusion, because i felt the sting when people make judgments about me that were not true or right, or that were awful and based on something why do you think i would do the wrong thing for this country . Why do you think i do not care about my country . Why would you think that of me, and you do not know me . I learned that hurts when people do that to you, so i have to be very careful to make sure that i am not doing that to anybody else who i consider a fellow human. So i tend to have that resonate through my mind a lot. Shonda that is a powerful lesson. [applause] shonda ok, it has been a special day for all of us. I also know it is a special day for you. Mrs. Obama oh yeah. Shonda i have a little bit of a surprise. Mrs. Obama do you . Shonda can you roll the video . Are you ready . Barack obama hey honey, i know you are with all these important pennsylvania women and you are sharing the stage with our buddy, shonda rhimes, but i had to crash this party because today we have been married for 25 years. [cheers and applause] now the idea that you would put up with me for a quarter of a century is a remarkable testament to what a saintly, wonderful, patient person you are. Um, it was a lot easier for me to do it, because the fact of the matter is not only have you been an extraordinary partner, not only have you been a great friend, somebody who could always make me laugh, somebody who would always make sure that i was following what i thought was right, but you have also been an example to our daughters and to the entire country. Your strength, your grace, your determination, your honesty, um, the fact that you look so good doing all this [laughter] the way in which you have always taken responsibility for your own actions, but also for looking out for the people around you. It is remarkable. And it is no wonder that, as people got to know you the way that i got to know you, that they fell in love. And it is truly the best decision i ever made to be persistent enough asking you out for a date that you finally gave in. [laughter] and i hope that you feel the same way. So, i do not want to interrupt the flow of what i am sure is a fascinating discussion, but i figured that you would not mind maybe me parachuting in to say how much i love you, and how much i appreciate you, and to all of the women in the audience, thank you for your indulgence. Byebye. [cheers and applause] shonda good man. Mrs. Obama thank you, guys. Shonda happy anniversary. [applause] shonda and thank you, everybody. Mrs. Obama thank you so much. Shonda rhimes. Shonda michelle obama. [applause] mrs. Obama that was so sweet. [cheers and applause] saturday morning on washington journal, we will talk to a Huffington Post contributor the Opioid Crisis during crisis. The ceo ofa one and free and charitable click next. Clinics. Washington journal, live on saturday on cspan. This weekend on the cspan cspan, saturday on former president ial speechwriters for president next and to obama. P. M. , how your zip code impacts your health. On book tv on cspan2 saturday at 9 00 p. M. Eastern, daily color News Foundation editorinchief on his book the art of the donald. A. M. , theday at 11 00 author of the mayflower. On American History tv on cspan3 on saturday, penn state onversity history professor u. S. Capitol art and architecture. Groundbreaking ceremony of the dwight d. Eisenhower memorial in washington, d c. This weekend on the cspan buses traveling across the country on our capital store. We stopped in louisiana, asking folks, what is the most important issue in their state . The month the number one issue is slow recovery. In baton rouge you had a historic flood in my district was impacted. We are forced to deal with loans, therding federal government considers those to be a duplication of benefits. We are having trouble getting other families the necessary dollars to recover. They have to deduct the amount they received through the loans. Right now, a recovery has been stalled because of this. We are working with the delegation, but that is an issue in our community. The most important state issue to me is restoration. Football field worth of land per hour. I would like the state to focus on restoring and replenishing our coastline. So future generations can see it. The most pressing issue we will face and one we are working on since the conclusion of our session the past year is our fiscal budget situation. Not uncommon to a lot of other states, i think ours is unique. What we face in 2018 is the load off of temporary writ of temporary revenue that will expire in june 2018. To be able to find solutions for that on the revenue side and the expense side are what we will be working on and hopefully coming up with solutions. Voices from the states, on cspan. Cspan, where history unfolds daily. 1979, cspan was created as a Public Service by americas Cable Television companies and is brought to you today by your cable or satellite provider. Democrats on the house, energy, and Commerce Committee and House Judiciary Committee hosted a forum on somatic brain injuries on traumatic brain injuries. Former pro Football Players and their families testified about their experiences dealing with the effects of concussions. This is two hours and 45 minutes. Nfl players and family members on their experiences. This is two hours and 45 minutes