Friend of the daily show who is now an author and correspondent for cbs sunday morning, mo rocca is joining us, everybody. cheers and applause also on tonights show, america is getting a new prince, your snacks have been lying to you, and donald trump heroically stops the war that he started. So lets catch up on todays headlines. Lets kick it off with some big news from across the pond. Being a member of the royal family has always been one of the sweetest gigs you can have. You get an unlimited budget for hats, there is always free crumpets in the break room and lets be honest, most of your job is just waving. But now two royal family members are turning in their twoweek notice. It was a rather stunning announcement today from the across the pond, prince harry and wife Meghan Markle say they are stepping away as senior members of the royal family, they announced it on instagram and social media is blowing up over it. The couple made that announcement saying they will split their time between the u. K. And north america and work to become financially independent. Trevor whroa, whoa, this is huge. Harry and meghan are leaving the palace to become financially independent. And you see, you see, this is what happens when you bring the first black woman into the royal family. Yeah, yeah, she looked at harry and she was like, you need to get a job, you need a job. You were grown ass man, you qub be living in your mommas house, harry. What is funny is that no matter what job prince harry gets, you realize he will still be prince harry. You can imagine being his boss when he screws up am what do you call him in and say, prince harry, get in here, your that jestee, you blew the hennerson account, pie lord, clean out your desk and may god save the queen. Now the big question is if harry and meghan come to america, where are they going to live. Everyone wants to know. I think they will move to l. A. Because meghan san actor an she will want to work again, and harry can join the cast of real housewives of beverly hills. Yeah, he will be fighting on tv, i know you what said about me, say it to my face. All right, moving on to the opposite of royalty. Harvey weinstein, disgraced hollywood procedure and man who is show uglier on the inside. His Sexual Assault trial has just begun here in new york and harvey is already on the judges bad side. Jury selection in Harvey WeinsteinsSexual Assault trial resumes today after some drama in court. The judge threatened to revoke the hollywood producers bail tuesday because he kement using the phone in urt could. The judge said quote is this really the way you want to end up in jail, by texting. Weinsteins team calls it a misunderstanding. Trevor yeah, Harvey Weinstein got into trouble because he kept pulling his phone out in court. Because apparently he cant keep anything in his pants. laughter actually feel bad for the judge in the situation because you have to uphold the law but then also be a middle school teacher, you know, are you texting . Give me your phone, you spit out your gun and i told you to i told you to stop jerking off, harvey, come on. This is how you know phones are addicted, this guy son trial for his life and he is sitting in this court room like i could go to pries on forever. I wonder what disney character i am. Lets see. Oh, ursula, i should have known. And finally, what would you do if you were walking down the street and heard someone screaming for help dont rush to call the cops because it may not be what you think. The concerned neighbor in florida called 911 after hearing someone screaming let me out. Turns out, the cries are from a pet parrot. The parrots owner says sheriffs deputies pulled up to his house after getting the call. He explained that the corporate was his 40 year old parrot named rambo. When he showed them the parrot, he says they burst out laughing. The owner says that he taught rambo to say let me out when he was a kid. Trevor okay. laughter . Trevor okay, hold on, so this dude says he tawlt his parrot to scream, let me out. And the cops just accepted that . You guys dont want to look in the house just in case. Cuz that bird might have picked it up from someone else, if you know what i mean. Yeah, the parrot is like let me out. Ha ha, i taught him how to say that, im in the base am. You see, its not. I was kidnapped by a man way parrot, baa, although wouldnt it be a funny twist if the cops arrested that guy, but it turns out that the parrot was just framing him so that he could have the house to it ef is. Now the own certificate in prison and the bird is throwing allnight parties, just hanging out with women, hello, ladies, like wow, i never met a parrot that owns a house. Thats right, im like harry, ive got my own crib. Thats it for the headlines, lets move on to our top story. applause over the past 24 hours the Huge Development in the conflict between the u. S. And iran. Lets catch up on all the latest in our ongoing segment, war in the middle east, this time its persian. Al. It is no exaggeration to say the world has been on edge severe since the United States killed questionsem soleimani. Iranian general and everyone was wondering how iran would respond. Last night we found out. Overnight iran taking revenge, launching a barrage of missiles targeting two u. S. Military bases and Coalition Troops in iraq. This, iran said, was its vengeance for the u. Ss killing of its top general. There were two waves of attack and iran foreign minister said his country was ready to step back if there was no american counterattack. And this morning no reports of the u. S. Coalition or iraqi casualties. Weve just heard from Iraqi Prime Ministers Office that they did indeed receive notification from the iranians that there would be a strike. That was a full five hours and 45 minutes before those missiles came in. Trevor thats right, last night iran launched 15 missiles at American Forces in iraq. But in an interesting twist, they killed no one, hurt no one, and gave the iraqi bases a six hour heads up. Which is a lot of warning. It was almost like they were sitting there like lets give them one hour notice. What if they are watching the irishman. Okay, six hours, give them six hours. They need time. applause so iran fired 15 mission ils, gave one giant warning and basically missed everything, which most people agree means that iran wants this thing to go away. They wanted a response to the United States in a way that would let them keep their pride but then also not in a way that would eggs ka late this conflict into a war, in International Diplomacy this type of action is known as a hold me back bro. And clearly it, wod. Clearly worked. Because after the missile attack, President Trump sent out a tweet saying all is well. Yeah. Which was hilarious because the tweet was composed like trump was writing a letter from the front lines of the civil war. My dearest twitter. All is well, missiles launched from iraq. So far so good. I hope to see you soon. Please kiss ivanka for me and not eric. Sincerely donald hashtag maga hashtag read the transcript. So plaws plaws if seems like iran was stepping down, trump was happy with their decision and today the president addressed the nation to give everybody an update. And im not going to lie, the address started out a little weird. As long as im president of the United States, iran will never be allowed to have a nuclear weapon. Good morning. laughter . Trevor okay, okay. Is it just me or, or did trump find a way to make this in the address sound like the beginning of an infomercial. Iran will mefer have nuclear weapons, hi, im donald trump. Tired of missile strikes when you arent even home . So a really weird start but fortunately once trump got into the meat, he reassured everybody that at least for the moment, the beef with iran has been quited. Iran appears to be standing down, which is a good thing for all parties concerned and a very good thing for the world. The civilized world must send a clear and unified message to the iranian regime, your campaign of terror, murder, mayhem will not be toller eighted any longer. These historic accomplimenshades are strategic priority. Trevor what was that . Toller eighted . A come plin menshades. Trumps mouth was missing mortar gets than those iranian missiles. laughter and now personally personally, honestly im glad. Im glad that iran and donald trump seemed to have agreed to let things settle down. Trump got what he wanted, kill the general and it didnt escalate into anything, this is a win for him, but i pray, i pray that dorn ald trump doesnt start watching fox news again any time soon because for them, all is not well. Er ins going to get hit hard. Their hostility will now be met with the full force of the greatest, most advanced, most sophisticated military this world has ever seen. This president will unleash holy hell on that regime. The mullahs only understand one language and that is the language of death. Sadly. And if death is what we have to give them to stop this, then sadly that is what we have to do. Number one, target not just the oil, but target the launch sites that fired those 15 missiles today. Ollie north is right stvment oil refineries, oil infrastructure, it is key missile sites, it is Nuclear Development sites. Throw in some ports, key infrastructure, and you know why, why not a cud headquarters for good nation on top of it. Trevor what, throw in some infrastructure while you are at it, this is wild. He is making impulse buys at the register, you know what throw in chapsticks and snickers and drone strike at the airport because daddy got paid. Seriously, what the hell is going on at fox. America droned a general, they killed someone, killed multiple people, in fact, and iran responded with warning shots, nobody got killed. Why would anyone want more violence after that. It doesnt make sense. So to help us find out were joined by our senior war correspondent michael kosta, everybody. cheers and applause it is so confusing right now. Why on earth are there still people who want to go to war with iran when they have clearly tapped out of the fight. Well, because you see, trevor, bombing iran is americas only option. Iranians dont speak the language of peace. The only words these people understand are boom, kapow, blamo, ah, he got me, tell my hot persian wife he can remarry michael kosta. Oh, michael, mi so glad im with you. Trevor okay, stop, stop, stop it. That is not true though, iran went out of their way to not kill anybody. Yeah, all the more reason to bomb them, okay. They scared the shit out of us for nothing, all right. I wasnt supposed to spend my tuesday night cowering in my studio apartment. I was supposed to spend it cheating at bar trivia. The trick is to look at your phone. Trevor wait, kosta, are you saying the u. S. Should bomb iran if they escalate but are you saying they should bomb iran if they deescalate. Now youre getting it. Trevor look, that might be your position but luckily today, the president said he wants to get iran back to the negotiating table. Yes, and the nshting table is the Perfect Place for a surprise bomb, okay. Were ready for peace, just kidding, boom, oh, kosesa can marry my wife too. Trevor michael, are you rallying tore fight a war in the middle east, it seems. Well, not me, trevor. I wouldnt say this shit if i had to go fight, you know. This is how it is on the news. We just talk and other people go do the fighting. Plus, im not a fighter, im a lover of persian women, oh, michael, michaelk im so sorry about what happened to your husband. Trevor are you disgusting, michael kosta, everybody, well be right back. What is wrong with that . But he wanted snow for thelace holidays. So we built a snow globe. Ill get that later. Dylan but the one thing we could both agree on was getting geico to help with homeowners insurance. What . Switching and saving was really easy i love you what . Sweetie hands off the glass. Ugh call geico and see how easy saving on homeowners and condo insurance can be. I love her ive always been drawn to creativity. The surface helps me organize my creative process. I think my work is powerful because im powerful, and this device allows me to make my imagination real. Trevor welcome back to the daily show, so it is a new year which means many laws that were past last year are now going into affect. So tonight were going to take a look at some of the laws you need to know about in our ongoing segment, new laws, who dis. First up, arkansas, its one of the top 50 states in america. And now a new law there is shaking up the world of science. Taking a stance against human cloning. A new law in arkansas bans public funding for human cloning or destructive embryo research, the penalty a class a misdemeanor and 1,000 fine. Trevor sorry, people of arkansas. New year, no new you. Thats right. If you try to do human cloning in arkansas you will face a 1,000 fine. Which doesnt seem like enough to stop someone from doing it. I am not going to lie. I dont know if it thr say Mad Scientist somewhere who is like my clone army will take over the world, wayne, a thousand dollars, forget t i will go back to the carwash. For real, 1,000 is not much of a fine to get a clone. Like especially if you can split the fine with your clone, then its half. laughter you know who i really feel bad for, all the twins in arkansas. Yeah, because the cops are going to be stopping them all the time like we dont take to clones around here. No, we were born this way. Prove it, describe your mommas vagina. The new laws, 2020, arent just about what you can do with your body. Some of them are also about what you are putting in. On new years day the fda new nutritional labeling rules kicked in launching a host of changes to the way that manufacturers are required to label packaged foods. One of the biggest changes that you will notice requires large food manufacturers to list two different columes on the nutrition label for their products. So one listing the nutrition fact ares for a single serving, the other for the entire package, the bag of chips, pint of ice cream, anything not good for that new years resolution. Trevor why, yes, thank you, thank you. This has been pissing me off for so long. How are you going to put the serving and the bag i picked up a bag of chips it is like 100 calories, that is great. Then after i eat the bag it is like five servings per bag, what the hell, why would you put five servings into one bag. You think im going to call four of my friends, you want to come over, ive got aye bag of chips. But even with the new label a lot of people dont even understand what calories mean. I think they need to give us practical information, like how much your tummy will hurt after you eat the food. Yeah, how many pimples you will get the next day, maybe like a scratch and sniff label to know hour your farts will smell after you eat the food, oh, goddam, im still going to eat them. I do like having the information, i wont lie. I wish they did it for more than just food, warning labels with nutrition so you knew what you were going into when you meet someone, wow two servings of douchebag, okay, okay, can i work with that, i can work with it. And finally, while the fda is working to be more transparent, in new jersey, 18 new laws go into effect in new jersey this year, one of the most talked about say law barring employers from using Salary History to screen potential workers. The bills sponsors says employers were previously able to ask about Salary History which they argue per pet situated a wage gap that favored men over women. Trevor this is actually a great law. You can just see before this, instead of paying people based on the work, some employers were underpaying people based on their previous earnings which was suppressing womens wages, if you dont get paid well, how much were you paid, well pay you the same but a little bit more. The wage gap continued to grow. But now bosses cant ask that question. I bet they will find ways to try though, you know, there will be like so when you watch hulu do you have ads . laughter no, okay. Okay. Okay. You can start on monday . Okay. So hopefully this new law will help a lot of people. Because your past salary shunlt determine what you get in the future. I mean imagine if that happened with other things in life. Like when you get into a new relationship and negotiate based on your previous one, would you look like so my ex only lasted two minutes in bed, okay, great, i will bump that up to three and a half, is that good, yeah. Well be right back. Well be right back. cheers and applause just get one of me looking off. Look, shes on another vacation. Wow, so happy for you, smiley face emoji. Funny how the words you typed dont reveal the jealousy you actually feel. Thanks, captain obvious. How is she there and were here . Condoms. True. Dont hatelike their trip, book yours with hotels. Com and get rewarded basically everywhere. Hotels. Com. Be there. Do that. Get rewarded. lis it turbotax or h r block ononline . Ese Tax Prep Services lets more people file for free. We may never know. lisa vo more people can file free with h r block online than turbotax. Its better with block. [sfx crowd cheering] [sfx girl giggles] 19if you dont get trthere in time,sm. We will lose sixteen hundred men. I cant see keep hold of me come on jump cheers and applause . Trevor welcome back to the daily show, my guest tonight is a correspondent for cbs sunday morning and a bestselling author whose latest book is called mobituaries, great lines worth reliving. Please welcome mo rocca. cheers and applause . Trevor welcome to the show. Thank you. Trevor congratulations on another book. Another book, thats right, thank you for remembering. Trevor right. What is fascinating is you wrote a book before this a smash hit about president s and their pets, right. Thats right. Trevor and then. The not the smash hit part but about president ial pets. Trevor it did well for a book about president s and their pet, the best performing president s and their pets book. Exactly, thank you. That is a lit in my book. Trevor right, and you didnt do that again, is it because trump doesnt have a pet. That is true that he is the first president to not have a pet in the white house. Chester alan arthur burned all of his papers but so we dont know for sure that he had pets, but my understanding is he had a gold fish, im not making this up. But donald trump does not have a pet. Trevor right. Fillmore also did not have a pet but was the Vice President of the aspca for the buffalo chapter when he left the white house so that counts. Trevor this book is interesting though because you wrote about people in this book, like mobituaries which is a play on your name but obituaries as well, great lives worth reliving. You went with all of the people who we almost wouldnt know about, you know, so it is not about jimmy carter but about someone . His family. Not about rossa parks but a black woman who decided to ride on a tram when she wasnt allowed to and it was all white. Why did you choose these characters, how did you find them. It is kind of marginalized history, these people that i dont think got the send off they deserve. I flow it sounds silly when we are talking about a serious subject like the elizabeth jennings, the rossa parks of new york. But it feels good. It is fun to know this stuff. Ilike that. And i thought people, especially these kind of pockets of progress that have been forgotten, i think are important to know about, that history doesnt move in a straight line. So somebody like elizabeth jennings, almost exactly 100 years before rossa parks is booted off of a street car in new york city. And she hires a future president , in fact, chester alan arthur, i cant believe there is the first interview everywhere Chester Allen allen arthur is named twice. He hires a qulowng Chester Allen arthur to de fen her in civil court and she wins and this leads to the integration of new York Transportation Authority shortly after the civil war. I thought that is kind of nuts that people dont know this. Trevor every store story in this book feels like stories you would want to be in the brain to be the most interesting person in a room because one of the disrees that blew my mine mind, i didnt know the history of the term sigh mees twins, con joined twins but the i didnt know it came from two twins from the region once known as siam which was thailand and you tell the story which is fascinating because they are con joined twins and come to america, brought to america, they are a side show and go on to become slave owners. Right. Trevor so you are cheering for them the whole time in the story and at some point you are like whoa. Oh, i almost completely loved you. Trevor right. You just screw canned it up at the last second. Trevor you had to go and become slave owners. Right. But that made it to me, it certainly is more complicated story, a richer story and a story more worth telling. They are kind of, they are immigrants, their names are chang and ang bunker, two of the first celebrities in america, once wildly famous. They are pull yourself up by your boot staps, they win their freedom and then they own slaves. And it is sort of like the story of america the good and the not good, all in one. Trevor right. They pack it all into that story. Trevor what is your favorite story, like that everyone you think should know about but they dont know about. Oh boy. There are so many that i love. I love the story of billy carter because billy carter the younger brother of jimmy carter. Is remembered by most people if at all as kind of a buffoon, kind of a joke, a caricature of a redneck. And he, in fact, i went and talked to president jimmy carter about him to his widow and his six kids. And they describe a man who was hardworking, who was very funny, and we know this from interviews, profiles that were done of him. And a man who was struggling with alcoholism. And in the last proud clap ter of his life, ministered to people that could relate to him about this. And you know, here he is in a small, tiny town in southwest georgia living his life, his brother decides to run for president , the media descends. I mean how would you, how would anyone handle that, the business, the Family Business was then put into a blind trust. Trevor right. Quaint, i know. laughter and those were the days. And so he has no choice but to make his living at being billy carter, kind of being a caricature of himself. But a complicated and descent man when you really learn about him. And so i wanted to be generous and i wanted to be compassionate. I think obituaries are the one place in journalism where the rule of thumb is, and i think should be, giving people the benefit of the doubt. Trevor thats interesting. Giving people the benefit of the doubt. When you die, i mean come on. laughter . Trevor youre gone. Right. Youre gone. I mean unless you are a war criminal, that is different. Trevor then no doubt, some doubt or no doubt at all. No benefit of the doubt, no nice stories about how they like puppies and all of that. Trevor got t thank you so much for being on the show, a fascinating book. Mobituaries is available now, a really fun read, mo rocca, everybody. Well be right back. Adventure. To reconnect and be together. And once we did that, we realized his greatest adventure is just beginning. vo welcome to the most adventurous outback ever. The allnew subaru outback. Go where love takes you. Ive always been drawn to creativity. The surface helps me organize my creative process. I think my work is powerful because im powerful, and this device allows me to make my imagination real. [i get up early in the morning by roger miller] country roads, take me home theres a booking for every resolution. Book yours at any price, at booking. Com cheers and applause . Trevor thats our show for tonight, well be back again tomorrow so we will see you then, but first heres your moment of zen. Live television, gang. Thats live tv for you. Excuse me, my kids are here, live television. Do it live [bleep]. Wow, that Jasmine Gould from buffalo, new york. laughter oh my god. I got it. applause captio [applause and cheering] announcer and now, david spade [applause and cheering] [applause and cheering] david yeah hey there you go. [applause and cheering] david hey thanks, guys. All right. Have a seat. Here we go. Welcome. On the show tonight we have justin, morgan, and erik. [a