Well, of course, i explained why, then here like this, and here like this, heres a bus, what are you going to do . I say, well, heres the bus, everyone there is shurik trying to everyone, giving in to everyone, which means its raining, and he s performing for everyone, which means the place is so nervous, this must be the case, and of course it was recorded there a very complex rhythm, which was artificial in some places, there was even a bass, there was pumpumpumpum. It was made from a ruler , an oak ruler, on the table, you put it like this, you make it like this, there are holes in it i even had the notes written here, so i moved them along this exact line, this, then something else, then live instruments, of course, were real. Already on this overlay the piano means he played tatatata but much faster , so he played at first twice not. Lower somewhere here, and then i sped him up twice and he, so nervous, he immediately i accepted, of course, all this, all this music, but sometimes it happened that sasha, but its impossible to make it faster here, i say, theres already, well, for example, some number there is faster, i say, well, this is the maximum, i say , the musicians simply wont play anymore, at first he still had mistrust, so he says, he was bringing this music, maybe you already showed it to someone, they didnt like it, and you listen to me, i say, come on ill compose another one, but i ll compose another one, youll say the same thing, again someone didnt like it, i brought it to you, but the absolute trust appeared at some point, then, of course, yes, then, but because i already had such a case with him, when i did, i dont remember what number, but he accepted everything, we are on the editing table there well see for ourselves there. This is all, how it all coincides, and it occurred to me, we should do it differently, i did it differently, i bring it to him, he says well, we approved everything, i say, well, well, this will be better, here you look, i need to get used to it again, i say, well, if its better, its okay, we looked, i liked it better, that is, he after this episode, he cant help but trust me, well, thats how they gradually got used to it, well, in gaidais films. He turned his head there, well, for example, and there 9 m 15, swung the crowbar over his head, there, it was an important moment, at this point it means i ran out of topic, i did it on purpose, that there was some kind of there was a topic going on there and it ended here , a small gap of a pause and then, this is an accent, that is, an accent it doesnt mean a hit on the head, theres a hit on the drum, but somehow something that coincided with the screen, well, thats it meters means im converting, now it means a meter is in seconds it means 1 second s. The most, perhaps, the most interesting thing was, of course, the operation and the first one, because it was unexpected, and i really liked it, interesting, of course , it was all, in todays industry in today s industry, you worked with young directors, look at the work of this film industry, are there any directors of gaidais level being born, in your opinion, well , or after gaidai, was there anyone, i just havent met anyone you were with. So now there will be a new one, so were working with the muse, but how do you determine which musical to deal with, which one may not be necessary, well, i just like it, i watched the cartoon once Ivan Tsarevich and the gray wolf , very good, i really liked that the fairy tale seems to be in our time somewhere around the corner. I went to the producer and said, i say, what will you allow me to do based on your script, and he agreed with me, my manager, malik signed a contract with him, so i made a film, it is being shown by nona grishaeva, with great success, now you have some kind of music on your phone in the player on which you listen to modern music, i prefer to listen to it at home on good speakers. On the phone its easy if you just listen to the phone, what kind of music is there, no bass, several hours, its not, but what do you have, what is in your repertoire, what do you like to listen to, in your repertoire, when you want listen, listen, i, i just dont have time to listen now, now im like this, as they say, theres so much to do that when listening, theres no time to listen, some time i listened to the young people. Im interested in listening to them, not only what they are doing there, but for now they still need to work for themselves, its interesting, there are some changes already little by little, but everything will be, dear friends, well, unfortunately for us , we need to finish already, alexandrevich gave us a huge amount of advice today, if you listen carefully to our podcast again, you can write them down in principle, but start with this advice. Work hard, dont allow yourself idleness, live a stable life , get into the flow, love your profession, and the most important thing is to love what you do, alexander sergeevich, thank you very much, please, this conversation, and i would really like from our viewers, from everyone, to present you this bouquet, for you, oh, yes, this is it, yes, this you, thank you very much, thank you for coming to us. This is already exercise, good exercise already with him, yes, thank you, health, happiness and a lot of inspiration, thank you, and new, new music, alexandrevich, it is really needed, it will be, thank you, thank you. This is the Popular Science podcast schrodingers cat, and i am its host, gregory tarasevich, chief editor of the magazine of the same name code. Schrodinger. Hello. Today we will talk about a rather difficult, at least for me, emotional topic about bullying and especially about childrens bullying that happens in schools. And today we have guests, singer victoria deineka, psychologist, chief expert of the no bullying program, maria afonina. Hello. Hello. Hello. Lets start right away with the personal, with the emotional, i hope we can handle it, lets each of us tell our story of School Bullying, here whos ready first, victoria, youre brave, lets try, okay, lets try, my story of School Bullying began with my first performances at our school, in our pop studio, and then i basically learned what the modern word hate is, huh. In our school there were these large benches with wooden coverings in the corridors, where it was possible to compile a dictionary of swear words regarding the last name of vika daineka, there simply all the benches were written off in my honor, one day i went to the toilet, there were none in our toilet there were partitions, there was just a big wall made of tiles, where my name and surname were written in lipstick, the whole wall was covered with some creepy things, words with all this, not to mention the desks and so on, and if it was like that written form of hatred towards me, then there were also personal speeches from some girls from our school, they threatened to kill me, they threatened a lot of things, well, in general they told me a lot of terrible things, challenged me to some conversations, arrows, i i dont know what to call it correctly. I remember that i felt terrible fear, i was incredibly scared, i remember how i cried on my mothers lap, saying that i would not go to this school, they would kill me there, mm, in general it was creepy, i dont remember the reaction mother at that moment, but i remember that quite quickly i moved to another school, a lyceum school, where there was a very small intimate atmosphere, by the way, after the incident in the toilet, where everything was written down, and i told the teachers, i say that its actually like. I was scared because i was terribly scared, i also dont remember how it all ended in the end, but i remember that i myself came to meet these people, and i remember these conversations, how my knees were shaking there, how i tried, i dont know, somehow out of these people, out of haters, to make, not like my friends, but somehow to calm them down a little, but thank god, it never came to a fight, i was never physically harmed. Although of course i felt colossal fear and most importantly stress just after moving to another school, where there was a completely different atmosphere, there were very, very few students more control over everything that was happening, only there i was able to calmly go to school, happily wake up and run there, to the school that was actually located under the windows of my house, and not somewhere on the outskirts of the city, i honestly remember what a small nightmare. Which, thank god, is over. Thank you very much for your frankness. Maria, do you have a history of bullying . I have different stories, because i have played different roles in this phenomenon, well, usually in bullying there are not only victims, there are instigators, those who start the bullying, there are, well, the socalled sweatleaders, those who join in this bullying, there are witnesses, that is, these are the people who, maybe they themselves. Do not write any unpleasant inscriptions and do not call themselves, but nevertheless less so with their silent approval or the fact that they do not interfere, they make a very big contribution to all this, my First Experience was when i encountered tavliya, i was just in the role of a witness, suddenly in our class in some kind of that moment i arrived, they started harassing the girl, and well, they called her names, somehow they teased her by her last name, no one wanted to sit with her, when she entered the class, everyone there ran away in Different Directions and somehow laughed. Then in the end, apparently someone hit her, because i remember that she started bleeding from her nose, this is a very interesting experience, for example, mine, when i was in the fifth grade, that is, it seemed to me, of course, it was hers i really feel sorry for this girl, and well, i was in shock, it was unclear what to do about it, but at the same time i had an inner feeling that this was how it should be, but that means she was doing something its wrong, since shes being bullied like this and they even broke her nose, and this is what very often the witnesses are. At some point we changed our russian language teachers and gave us a young guy who had just recently, apparently graduated from university, for some reason we decided that we needed to return the old teacher and no one came up with anything better , how to start bullying this young teacher, and well , there was also a very unpleasant situation, that is, we laughed at him, refused to answer , there were some kind of giggles, some offensive things, but i think that it was very, of course, difficult for him all this, its a shame that at that moment there wasnt, well , some adult, that is, the same school director, maybe if he had come and once said listen, well, what you are doing will definitely not help bring back your previous teacher, but you are causing enormous trauma and generally harm to this young teacher, who, well, in principle , did nothing to you, well, nothing like that. happens, why should you treat him this way, i think it might have some effect. Stop this whole process, and this is not interference, it is actually, well, generally terrible, and i always thought that i had never been in the role of an aggressor, but then i remembered that i also organized persecution against someone close enough to me, and i remember that i involved a fairly large number of our mutual friends so that we would run away, not be friends there, and throw some notes. Well, at that moment i wanted to somehow punish this person, and of course, now, when i remember this experience, i remembered it not immediately, only thanks to the fact that i started working in this program, i realized that, well, i really was an aggressor, this is probably what many aggressors feel, that is, as if over the years this experience is forgotten, it seems to them that what happened was normal, but of course, its not normal, and well, its a pity that there wasnt an adult nearby who could also somehow Pay Attention to this situation and. Say that what youre doing this is wrong and its not necessary, and ive already become a victim of bullying at the very last moment, probably, when i was maybe 14 years old, everything was generally great at school, but i went to a camp and, well, ended up in a camp with guys who were also quite different from me, that is, i was from a good moscow school, i ended up in a camp where there were a lot of kids, well, not very many of them, probably from some. Well, its bad here, take me away from here, my parents told me that everything is fine, youll figure it out, you just have to get used to it, its clear that they didnt know that this was happening there bullying, but this experience, when you try to ask for help, and they tell you everything is fine, figure it out, it is of course very difficult, this is not even such. Not very long bullying, which lasted for 3 weeks, it of course, well, i think that i left my mark on my future history, that is , for some time i was afraid to communicate with people, it seemed to me that something was wrong with me and that everyone was somehow not looking at me so, well, this is one of those manifestations of social anxiety, then thats all of course gone, but nevertheless, even such a shortterm persecution, it is very dangerous, well, after. Marias words, i myself began to wonder if i was once an aggressor or a silent witness, so im probably going over something in my memory it happened, maybe even now its happening somewhere, and i advise everyone who listens to us to think, maybe you and i at some point became aggressors and just didnt notice it, we thought that it should be so be, but there were definitely victims of bullying, i remember this from school, it was very unpleasant, i. Am still on my right hand i wear such a mark, fortunately already inconspicuous, either in the sixth or in the seventh grade, classmates during a chemistry lesson extinguished and put out the hand, that is, they twisted the hand, put it on the table, lit a cigarette and then extinguished it, and even the teacher i was in my class, but i didnt know what to do, i keep this little scar as some kind of memory of a not very happy childhood, and maybe some kind of life lesson, but from the height of our years of experience on. Our minds, so that you and i, well, each of us would you advise your then self what to do in this situation . Victoria, what advice would you give to yourself back then . First of all, i would advise myself to talk more about what is happening as adults, because when you are a child, well, you yourself cannot somehow resolve this situation correctly, now having your own child, i kind of see. Her situation, where she can also be bullied in a childrens camp, something else, i immediately immediately intervene in the situation, because i dont want this to work out somehow later on my child, because she is a little more sensitive than me. I dont fully understand about parents, i didnt tell my parents, it seems to me that for girls and boys this is basically different, that is, if girls can come to mom and dad, please, then if you are a boy, then you should probably be so strong on the contrary, like i dont complain to my parents, well, lets say its a girl, so she told her parents what parents should do to help in this situation , the most important thing to do is first calm down, because if. A child comes to you and says that he is being bullied, then of course there are a lot of emotions, thats important, well, how to help yourself calm down, different ways help everyone, that is, you can call a friend , go for a walk, listen to some kind of. Then meditation, i dont know, in the end , turn to a psychologist, then you calmed down , yes, the next thing is that many parents also seem to skip a stage, because they immediately run to do something at school, it is very important to support the child, and here while talking with a child, it is important to emphasize on the fact that. That this is terrible, this should not happen, that the problem is not with you, and this is not because there is something wrong with you, but because the class suddenly decided to behave like this, that is, you you can be tall or short, be able to sing beautifully or not be able to sing, smart there or less capable, this still does not give anyone the right to bully you, it is very important to convey this position to the child, because bullying very quickly begins to have a destructive effect on his selfesteem. The next thing that is important is to tell the child that i am with you. And i will do everything that depends on me so that you feel safe at school, these words help the child feel much more confident, yes, and then you can go to school, try to do something there, or like that , for example, to change schools if at the school, in the one in which the child studies, it becomes really quite unsafe, when cigarettes are put out in ones hand or the arrows are scored, well, that is, apparently the situation there has really already gone too far, but what if havent come yet . Then what to do, what to do . Parent came to school, says my child is being bullied, what else should he say . Yes, he should say that my child is being bullied, of course, if we are considering some kind of ideal story, it would be good for the teacher to agree with this, then it is important to start working with the whole class, because what if we talk only with the aggressors , stop doing this, if we only talk to the child as a victim, behave differently, if we put the aggressors and the victim together, try to come to an agreement, thats all. Well, it doesnt work, but this is the teachers concern, and what should the parent do . So he came to school, signaled everything, yes, he came to school, signaled, said what was happening, well, i dont know there, on such and such a date this happened, this happened here, this happened here, every time my child suffers, alone and the same children are participating in this, this is bullying, so please, please take action and agree with the teacher when these measures will be taken and what exactly, for example, will you find out in a week what has changed . What is being done, if nothing is being done, then go to the director school, you can submit a written statement, in which it is also important to list all the specific facts, that is , ask the director to describe everything, everything, so that she can already accept it