President trump, today, instructed the state department to develop a plan to relocate the us embassy from tel aviv to jerusalem. And melania has developed a plan to relocate herself from d. C. Back to new york. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] towards the end of the speech on israel today, President Trump began to slur his words leading some to speculate that he make have been wearing dentures. But the white house insists that its nothing unusual and that most of his words are slurs. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] here, take a look. I asked the leaders of the region, political and religious. Israeli and palestinian. Jewish and christian and muslim to join us in the nobel quest for lasting peace. Thank you. God bless you. God bless israel. God bless the palestinians and god bless the united states. Thank you very much. [ laughter and applause ] seth i cant believe both our first and our last president had fake teeth. [ laughter ] or as trump calls dentures, fake chews. [ laugh
Nuclear buttons so they can feel big and important. Ask your doctor is your heart is healthy enough to destroy the world. Do not take viagrageton if you are sane. Viagragedon do we all have to die because your penis is small . Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, tiny hands, big button. Plus, stephen welcomes America Ferrara David Harbour and musical guest julien baker. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen anniversary nice. Lovely. Invigorating. Hey, everybody thanks so much. Please sit down, folks. Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen welcome, welcome cheers and applause theyre just theyre just theyre just screaming to keep warm, you realize. Welcome to the late show, everybody. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. And it is great cheers and applause thank you very much. Back at you. No, back at you for being here tonight. Its great to be with you, all of y
Big and important. Ask your doctor is your heart is healthy enough to destroy the world. Do not take viagrageton if you are sane. Viagragedon do we all have to die because your penis is small . Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, tiny hands, big button. Plus, stephen welcomes America Ferrara David Harbour and musical guest julien baker. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen anniversary nice. Lovely. Invigorating. Hey, everybody thanks so much. Please sit down, folks. Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen welcome, welcome cheers and applause theyre just theyre just theyre just screaming to keep warm, you realize. Welcome to the late show, everybody. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. And it is great cheers and applause thank you very much. Back at you. No, back at you for being here tonight. Its great to be with you, all of you here, together, physically int
Nuclear buttons so they can feel big and important. Ask your doctor is your heart is healthy enough to destroy the world. Do not take viagrageton if you are sane. Viagragedon do we all have to die because your penis is small . Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, tiny hands, big button. Plus, stephen welcomes America Ferrara David Harbour and musical guest julien baker. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen anniversary nice. Lovely. Invigorating. Hey, everybody thanks so much. Please sit down, folks. Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen welcome, welcome cheers and applause theyre just theyre just theyre just screaming to keep warm, you realize. Welcome to the late show, everybody. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. And it is great cheers and applause thank you very much. Back at you. No, back at you for being here tonight. Its great to be with you, all of y
Thats right. Specifically, which president did you most enjoy seeing jon bleep on. For nearly 17 years, jon stewart and the daily show have taken on all president s without fear or favor, providing satirical commentary on every occupant of the oval office. Its bush, right . 100 bush. Has to be bush. Totally bush. Heres a clip of the winning segment. Jon now, as you know, the administrations conduct concerning prosecuting the war on terror has been questioned by some. laughter but as the president himself explains, theres a perfectly good reason why we dont understand what hes doing. This is a different kind of war. A kind of war weve never faced before. Its a totally different kind of war. Its. Its. Than. Than ones were used to. I told you its a different kind of war with a different kind of enemy. Jon they. They wear shoes on their hands. laughter and applause im telling you, these people are crazy. They eat with their butts. laughter they call their jesus muhammad. It makes no sense.