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Transcripts For MSNBC Republican National Convention 20240720

They suspended wall construction. We have policy, remain in mexico. You think that was easy to get from the mexican government . I said you must give it to was and if you dont there will be repercussions and they gave them to us. Canceled our agreements. Demolished title 42. Implemented nationwide catch and release. Catch and release where we catch them and release them into our country. We catch them and release them into mexico. And took 93, this is the previous administration, 93 Executive Actions to throw open our border to the world. The entire world is pouring into our country because of this very foolish administration. The greatest innovation and histories take a place right here in our country. They are coming in from every corner of the earth, not just south america but africa, asia, the middle east. They are coming from everywhere. They are coming at levels we have never seen before. It is an invasion, indeed, that this administration does absolutely nothing to stop them. Th

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Transcripts For CNN The History of Comedy 20240709

nothing worse than that. listen, i will be cussing tonight. just so s you know. no, i will. don t [ bleep ] me. not allowing an artist to use the word [ bleep ] is not allowing a gettest to use the chord e. it s possible to play the instrument but why the [ bleep ] would you bother. don t wave your finger at me, you knew when you got here there d be cussing. last thing comedy needs it to be polite. world wasn t changed by anyone being well-mannered or quiet. there s exhilaration in pushing the boundaries. i have memory of being three and would shower with my mother. my mom got her water from the showerhead. that water would then cascade down her ample bosom and pike off her 70s jew bush. that was my water. i was raised by parents who spoke explicitly. there s something about growing up not knowing that talking about your vagina or penises was taboo. now, if you haven t done it before, ladies go home and treat yourself. do it tonight. give your man a little pu

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Transcripts For CNNW The 20240704

i cuss gratuitously, but subject matter s another story. this is going to be a good show. are there any subjects that are never appropriate for humor? ferguson: people say a good comedian doesn t have to cuss. and i thought, that s [bleep] rubbish. how dirty is too dirty? -why is all that so funny? -i don t know. what you re about to hear is going to shock and disgust you. wong: if you choose to go blue, you gotta do it right. dirty for the sake of dirty, there s nothing worse than that. you must promise me something. you won t get me in any trouble on the show tonight. [ music playing ] [ cheers and applause ] and, listen, i will be cussing tonight. just so as you know. no, i will, i will. don t [bleep] aww me. [ laughter ] not allowing an artist to use the word [bleep] is like not allowing a guitarist to use the chord e. it s possible to play the instrument, but why the [bleep] would you bother? now, don t wave your finger at me. you knew when you got here there d be

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Transcripts For CNN The Mark Twain Prize for American Humor 20240706

disappeared. deductions don t get this corgi found out you can ride off 9 70 30. oh, all night to the center. that s why it s on. the show. six susie and man s as low as well above. yeah shop observer of human make david hasselhoff space. senior girl. man puts fishies in history. friends. alan juicy speed over schneider and boucher share me. have to pee in his pants. just to stay until. it s jennifer drew, but laid his wife or would not getting to first base in real life. yeah so many jews, it can you switches channels? crisis rather than the wrong! because his brother has a penis . gave us. happy to you. that s nice. stop looking at me. this is how you win them from standing judas beauty and we cheat. at the training in his grave spin. there s no one like you said. youtube you make this laugh? keep straight employed. you make me proud to be a jew. you deserve this elaborate club for return. please. 24 human. thank you all. under smartest man alive. prices wrong! you re out.

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Transcripts For CNN The Mark Twain Prize for American Humor 20240706

ride off 9 70 30. oh, yeah. the night to the center. that s why it s on cnn. the show. six susie and man s as low as well above. shop observer of human. david hasselhoff space. see you. girl. man puts fishies in history. thanks friends. alan do see speed over schneider and the boosh share me. that s to pee in his pants. just to stay until. it s jennifer drew but laid his wife or would not getting to first base in real life. yeah so many jews. can you switches channels? crisis rather than the wrong! because his brother has a penis . gave us. happy to you. stop looking at me. thank you. this is how you win them from standing judas beauty and we cheat. at the tween and in his grave, at least spit. there s no one like you said. youtube you make us laugh, keep straight employed. you make me proud to be a jew. you deserve this elaborate club for return. 24 human. i am the smartest man alive. prices wrong! you re out. doyle rules. now you re all in big, big trouble. i want you to m

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