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Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20170502

This is what it did to a smart person. [ laughter ] by the time youre out of office, youre going to look like the toxic avenger. [ laughter ] President Trump said yesterday that being president has been a big burden on his family. Yes, but somehow we manage, said melania from her penthouse in new york. [ light laughter ] in an interview today, President Trump questioned why america fought the civil war, even worse, then he questioned whom america fought in the civil war. [ light laughter ] wait, i know this one. Was it china . [ laughter ] thats right. President trump questioned why america fought the civil war. You know, at this rate the only way trump is going to get a second term is if hes held back. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] all fs . I flunked everything . [ cheers and applause ] i got a bplus in phys ed. [ light laughter ] President Trump published an oped in the Washington Post on saturday to promote the accomplishments of his first 100 days in office. But in retrospec

Transcripts For WRC Late Night With Seth Meyers 20170502

This is what it did to a smart person. [ laughter ] by the time youre out of office, youre going to look like the toxic avenger. [ laughter ] President Trump said yesterday that being president has been a big burden on his family. Yes, but somehow we manage, said melania from her penthouse in new york. [ light laughter ] in an interview today, President Trump questioned why america fought the civil war, even worse, then he questioned whom america fought in the civil war. [ light laughter ] wait, i know this one. Was it china . [ laughter ] thats right. President trump questioned why america fought the civil war. You know, at this rate the only way trump is going to get a second term is if hes held back. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] all fs . I flunked everything . [ cheers and applause ] i got a bplus in phys ed. [ light laughter ] President Trump published an oped in the Washington Post on saturday to promote the accomplishments of his first 100 days in office. But in retrospec

Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20170530

This is what it did to a smart person. [ laughter ] by the time youre out of office, youre going to look like the toxic avenger. [ laughter ] President Trump said yesterday that being president has been a big burden on his family. Yes, but somehow we manage, said melania from her penthouse in new york. [ light laughter ] in an interview today, President Trump questioned why america fought the civil war, even worse, then he questioned whom america fought in the civil war. [ light laughter ] wait, i know this one. Was it china . [ laughter ] thats right. President trump questioned why america fought the civil war. You know, at this rate the only way trump is going to get a second term is if hes held back. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] all fs . I flunked everything . [ cheers and applause ] i got a bplus in phys ed. [ light laughter ] President Trump published an oped in the Washington Post on saturday to promote the accomplishments of his first 100 days in office. But in retrospec

Transcripts For WCAU Late Night With Seth Meyers 20170530

My friends know me so well. They can tell what im thinking, just by looking in my eyes. But what they didnt know was that i had dry, itchy eyes. I used artificial tears from the moment i woke up. To the moment i went to bed. So i finally decided to show my eyes some love,. Some eyelove. Eyelove means having a chat with your eye doctor about your dry eyes because if youre using artificial tears often and still have symptoms, it could be chronic dry eye. Its all about eyelove, my friends. With simply right checking from santander bank, just make one deposit, withdrawal, transfer, or payment each month to waive the monthly fee. And theres no minimum balance. Youre alright with simply right checking from santander bank. Are you feeling alright, baby . [ cheers and applause ] jimmy my thanks to john oliver, patton oswalt, all the robots in the tonight showbotics. And james arthur right there once again [ cheers and applause ] and the roots from philadelphia, pennsylvania [ cheers and applau

Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20170708

[ light laughter ] this is what it did to a smart person. [ laughter ] by the time youre out of office, youre going to look like the toxic avenger. [ laughter ] President Trump said yesterday that being president has been a big burden on his family. Yes, but somehow we manage, said melania from her penthouse in new york. [ light laughter ] in an interview today, President Trump questioned why america fought the civil war, even worse, then he questioned whom america fought in the civil war. [ light laughter ] wait, i know this one. Was it china . [ laughter ] thats right. President trump questioned why america fought the civil war. You know, at this rate the only way trump is going to get a second term is if hes held back. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] all fs . I flunked everything . [ cheers and applause ] i got a bplus in phys ed. [ light laughter ] President Trump published an oped in the Washington Post on saturday to promote the accomplishments of his first 100 days in offic

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