Thousands of passengers stranded. At one point this morning, all commercial domestic departures were suspended. [t[tune of dadanger zonee] announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight all systems go. First, stephen welcomes Janelle Monae and jamie oliver with a special appearance by m. Night shyamalan, featuring louis cato and the late show band. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert [cheers and applause] stephen good to see you. Thank you very much. Happy wednesday. Happy wednesday. Happy, happy, happy. There you go. Thanks, everybody. You are very kind. Welcome, one and all. Stephen Stephen Stephen i dont want to get in your way. Go ahead. Welcome. Welcome on and all to the late show. I am your host, Stephen Colbert. Let me start off. Start off with a simple anybody in out of town here . I assume you drove here because this morning, an faa computer glitch grounded all departing domestic flights across the country. Well,
We go now live to bill dundee, spokesman for rio tinto, at the site. How is the search going, bill . We feel confident well locate this aspirinsized capsule lost in 850 miles of arid desert wasteland quickly. What does the recovery effort look like so far . We are doing Everything Possible to find what weve codenamed baby chernobyl, including boots on the ground, as well as these milk cartons have you seen me . If so, alert your local crematorium immediately. What about the radioactive threat to all living things . Im here to assure the threat is minimal. Isnt that a giant mutant ant behind you right now . Oh back, back its just my assistant, kevin. Go to lunch, kevin announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, the eagles have landed plus, stephen welcomes Rachel Brosnahan and Murray Bartlett. Featuring louis cato and the late show band. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert [cheers and applause] stephen beautiful, beaut
Imagine forcing yourself to tell lies all day about everything in ways that were so transparent and so outlandish that there is no way the people listening to you could possibly believe anything you said. Its been fun. Im actually the single dumbest person ever to perform on cable news. You mamay be wonderiring, whatn store ahahead, the many years ahead . My plan is having sex x with m. [cackling] announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight. Tuck around and find out. And nicolas cage takes the colbert questionert. Plus, stephen welcomes James Marsden and musical guest joy oladokun. Featuring louis cato and the late show band. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stphen hey you know what . [cheers and applause] thank you, everybody down here, up there, all around the world. Everybody watching. Mom and dad. Welcome to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. [cheers and applause] and weve been off the air for a week.
She was a busy smalltown baker and devout catholic, he was a recently widowed podiatrist who marked the lent calendar with daily devotionals. It turns out the one thing they couldnt give up for lent was love. Ashes two passions, dust to last and she was a single meteorologist who prayed for her love drought to end. He was a great farmer whose uncle was the pope. One day an actual drought brought them together. Would they find love . He has raisen. You will also enjoy these lengths time classics. Wine and rosary, for head over heels, and of course a fine piece of ash. The Hallmark Channel its the late show wit Stephen Colbert tonight, smAsh Wednesday and valentines day with Stephen Stephen welcomes Mark Wahlberg and Lily Gladstone featuring louis cato and the late show band. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert. [cheers and applause] stephen welcome, welcome, and here come out there, all the ships and sees, i am your host, Stephen Colb
Will smith. Huh . Announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert tonight. Deja tuesday. Plus, stephen welcomes Neil Degrasse tyson and comedian ariel elias. Featuring louis cato and the late show band. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert stephen there you go. [cheers and applause] have a good show. Louis have a good show, man. Stephen please have a seat, everybody. Thank you so much. Welcome one at all to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. [cheering] yesterday was super tuesday, which makes today wednesday. And the results are in. Joe biden and donald trump dominated super tuesday. Now, for a rematch that everyone claims they dont want, its awfully popular at the polls. Its like the whole nation is ordering takeout and deciding, okay, were gonna do the thai place again, even though the noodles stick together in a weird cube thats shaped like the box it comes in, as long as we all agree that were not getting the sweet and