How many of you, how many of you are visiting us here . How many of you are here on a trip . [cheers and applause] well, i hope you are enjoying yourselves, because it would appear that others arent. According to a prominent travel website that i never heard of been today, they ranked the top 99 Tourist Destinations intionss world, and right smack at the bottom is the hollywood walk of fame, which is us, they say we are the worst tourist attraction in the world, woirse than the labrea tar pits. And thats tar. The number one Tourist Destination according to them is the plaza de espanzia in bra bra never heard of it. Statue of liberty is number 41. And our neighborhood is less. Part of how they came up with this is they used reviews from trip adviser. These are come of the walk of fame reviews on trip adviser. Big disappointment, very disappointing. Do not go to hollywood. We walked past people smoking actual crack in the street. What, you want them to smoke fake crack . Disgusting . And
Ive given it a lot of thought. Theres no good way to tip him. You cant put the tip in an envelope on the container because they might not see it. It could go to the dump. Also, somebody might steal it before they even get to it. I dont know how to mail it to them. Even if i did, i have no confidence that it would get to my garbage man. And so i dont know what to do. Am i supposed to wait outside my house at 5 00 in the morning to hand each one of them the tip . Im not doing that. I have three garbage trucks that come to my house. One for trash, one for recycling, one for yard clippings. Im not going to spend the night and morning out there. Should i tape a map under the lid of each can that will lead them to the tip . [ laughter ] a Nicholas Cage National Treasure type thing, i dont know. Maybe train a raccoon to deliver the money, you know . Tommy the tip raccoon that might be the only way to go. Until elon musk comes up with a garbage drone, these guys are going to have to get venmo
On behalf of all of us, we want to extend our best wishes to those who are in the path of the hurricane, Hurricane Michael is pounding the Florida Panhandle and georgia. They say this is the most powerful storm to make landfall in the continental United States in more than 25 years. Which really makes me wonder why they named it michael. Michael is a much too casual name for a hurricane and im worried people wont take it seriously. Be prepared, michaels coming. Oh, good, is he bringing the kids . [ laughter ] michael isnt a very its not a scary name, you know what im saying . Oh not youre youre very, very scary no, no, youre very scary, okay . Youre a really scary guy. [ laughter ] great, now ive upset him. All right. No, no, dont come back. Just yes, the snacks are that way. You know the Trump Administration moved very quickly to gear up for this hurricane. This is where they really shine. Before the storm hits. The president said, we are very well prepared and absolutely ready. Hes g
Out of philadelphia. The city of brotherly love. Where the citizenry fell victim to one of the most unusual robberies ever. The largest live insect heist in history. Maybe the only live insect heist in history, i dont know. [ laughter ] thousands of bugs have been stolen from the philadelphia insectarium. Thieves made off with more than 7,000 bugs including millipedes, rhinoceros roaches, lizards, frogs, snakes and venomous spiders valued at more than 40,000. I get why people steal, but whats the plan after a theft like this . Unless you live in an ant farm you walk around the street going, wanna buy some bugs . [ laughter ] theres a tweet on the subject, a warning. If you see this sixeyed sand spider that is highly venomous, let the philadelphia insectarium know. Trust me, ill let that know. I see that freaking thing . Ill let everybody know if i see it, probably with a loud and very girlish scream. In happier philadelphia news, the new nfl season kicked off tonight. The eagles hosted