[cheers and applause] greg: happy monday. It s time once again for it s the cuomo s. Starring andrew and chris yes, it s the bro with the show and the bro who won t go. The obnoxious anchor and critical can correspond the government home and the governor who s toast. The administrator who s lost appeal. The chuckle head who blows hot gas and the even if who likes to grab. Don t do it. An ass. Sorry. So as governor cuomo drowns his denial, how can cnn manage a smile? well they re handling his brother the crisis specialist with kid gloves. They re standing mound in fresh with captain pop in fresh to attempt a cleanup. I wonder, does chris cuomo have a lot to say? countries cuomo has a lot to say but right now he cannot say it. Cnn management has made two things clear to him. One that he can t talk about his brother andrew cuomo on tv and two that he cannot participate in any more strategy sessions with the governor s aide. Oh, isn t that convenient? manage if cnn used that on everyone. H
but other people, who i call jerks, went to a judge s house to protest on behalf of abortion. seems like an ironic thing to do on a mother s day weekend, cheer for abortion. which is what happened. a mother load of manic hysterics showed up outside the homes of u.s. supreme court justices saturday to protest the repeal of roe v wade. reminds me of an old joke. how do you get a bitter left winger off your porch? pay for the pizza. so here s msnbc s next democrat cleaner upper who moon lights as press secretary rattling off some answer as she pre tends to still give a crap about her current job. trigger warning you ll see red after her answer and it won t be her hair. you think the progressive activists now planning protests outside the justice s houses are extreme? peaceful protests? no. peaceful protests is not extreme. activists posted a map with home addresses of the supreme court justices. is that something the president wants to help your side make their point. i
we represent the lollipop guild, the lopy pop guild, the lollipop guild. tyrus: he was the tall one. as for me many of you heard i ve retired from wrestling. it s okay, but i ll still choke slam anyone who asks for joe mackey s pronouns. but now that i m retired, i can focus on other things, like my kids. or helping out around the house. cutting the grass. fixing the water heater. cleaning out the garage. maybe organize my closet. i might find a pair of long pants that actually fits. who knows, maybe i ll see more books and read more movies. yep. and i ll be home all the time. all the time. all the time. all. the. no, i know what i can do, i can solve world hunger. that would be easy for me, all i have to do is skip lunch. okay, maybe not. but i know one thing, i can bring this country together. now i m strong enough to pull alaska south to join the rest of us. i can even run for president. but i d have to be twice my age. so i say down with division and up with home. now
[cheers and applause] greg: that s right, it s the time of year where nothing is going on. and by nothing, i mean women s soccer. so as we hear constantly, america today is a deeply polar sized nation, black versus white, barbie versus oppenheimer, bud light versus drinking from the toilet. the only thing we see to agree upon is my smoldering sexual magnetism, and that s okay. but traditionally one of the places the country s collectively left politics aside is in sports. especially international sports. because, you know, it s us against them. any one of a certain age will never forget the miracle on ice and no, i m not referring to the time i discovered vodka. it s when the olympic us men s hockey team beat the soviet red army. bernie sanders is still demanding a do-over. but it was 1980 and the team and the country celebrated. it was a victory for freedom over decrepit system that in a decade would fall like a nancy pelosi face lift. my how things have changed, som
greg: yes, yes, yes, yes! happy snowy tuesday. there are two words that should scare the crap out of us, and it s not stelter nudes. nope. it s president harris. during an interview with the wall street journal the veep said she s ready to step in as commander in chief. quote, i am ready to serve. there is no question about that. serve what, you ask. if it s anything more than a tennis ball, trust me, she d be over her head. of course she means she s ready should something happen to the current president. now she also claims that everyone who sees her on the job, quote, walks away fully aware of my capacity to lead. no. they don t walk away, they run. in the first two years, more than 13 high profile aids have rest the vp s office and that s through an open window. now it s worth pointing out that kamala gave that answer before the her report. it s one thing she actually saw coming besides willie brown. no, he was always sneaking up on her. people are minds in the gutte