[ laughter ] good evening, i m mr. carson, you new home room teacher. pay attention because there will be a quiz right after the monologue. you sound good tonight. freddy came back and said what a great audience tonight. how are you tom? very well. doc is still in cincinnati recording with the cincinnati symphony orchestra he s recording the b and horistacata. right. okay. [ applause ] see i remember. i forgot the other song he s recording. you mentioned wait a minute the bell song from luck me. that wasn t what you said last night. [ inaudible ]. that s the one i couldn t remember that. well, what do we start off with? there was some health news. how about some health news? i always wanted to start a monologue with some health news. in the paper today new study risk of a heart attack. but they also found out that having a heart attack only feels slightly worse than eating oat bran. [ cheers and applause ] they come up with something every year this fibe