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The Atlantic A Shift in American Family Values Is Fueling Estrangement Both parents and adult children often fail to recognize how profoundly the rules of family life have changed over the past half century. Bettmann / Corbis / Getty / The Atlantic Sometimes my work feels more like ministry than therapy. As a psychologist specializing in family estrangement, my days are spent sitting with parents who are struggling with profound feelings of grief and uncertainty. “If I get sick during the pandemic, will my son break his four years of silence and contact me? Or will I just die alone?” “How am I supposed to live with this kind of pain if I never see my daughter again?” “My grandchildren and I were so close and this estrangement has nothing to do with them. Do they think I abandoned them?”  

United statesSteven mintzAndrew cherlinStephanie coontzJohns hopkins universityCouncil on contemporary familiesContemporary familiesAmerican childhoodAdult childrenFamily estrangementParents hurtMuch responsibilityEstranged childLikelihood of divorcePast half centuryRules of family life