What are you going as . The problem with that is, little kids change their minds every 11 seconds. You can order a paw patrol costume and then she wants to go as mcstuffins. I have two older kids so i know this. But my wife didnt. So the other day she asked our daughter jane, what do you want to be . And she said i dont want to be a princess for halloween. I want to be wonder woman. I need a cape. Now first of all, no one ever mentioned being a princess. I have no idea where she got that. And even though he wonder woman does not wear a cape, we were excited. Because you know, wonder woman is tough. We ordered the costume on amazon and four seconds later it arrives at our house. [ laughter ] we open the box and you know, we showed it to her. Heres your wonder woman costume. Do you want to try it on . She said no, i dont wonder. Im not wonder woman. Im jane. I dont wonder. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] now were wondering what the hell were going to do for a costume. My older daugh
Justin verlander and kate upton, a tribute to sharon jones and the legendary roots crew. Questlove 772. Yeah steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats a great crowd right there. That is a hot, new york city crowd right there tonight. [ cheers and applause ] welcome. Welcome, everybody, to the tonight show. This is it, baby. Youre here. You made it. [ cheers and applause ] looking good. Well, heres what heres what people are talking about. You guys, thanksgiving is less than a week away. [ cheers and applause ] a lot of people are traveling, but heres a tip, heres a tip. Before you get a pat down at the airport, make sure its from an actual tsa worker and not a United States senator. Okay . Just do [ cheers and applause ] dont worry about it. Thats a little tip from me to you. You hear about this . At a rally today, roy moores wife, kayla, said trump should thank him for distracting people from russia. [ laughter ] then she thanked al franken for distra
[ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] democrats last night won the governorships in virginia and new jersey. Or as fox news reported, are emojis turning kids gay . [ laughter and applause ] last night, danica roem became virginias first openly transgender person elected to the house of delegates. [ cheers and applause ] defeating robert marshal, a conservative republican who wrote a controversial antilgbt bathroom bill. So bad news, robert. She did get to choose her own bathroom, and she chose the one in your old office. [ cheers and applause ] President Trump tweeted today that quote, noko has interpreted americas past restrain as weakness. This would be a fatal miscalculation. Do not underestimate us and do not try us. Strong words except for noko. [ light laughter ] youre trying to talk about an existential threat to the world. Dont make it sound like a cool new york neighborhood. [ light laughter ] my friend grayson just got a loft in noko. Hes opening a hot sauce museum. [ laughter
You pressed 1 for normal. Guess what . Im not selling you a ticket. Maybe you should call fandango. To learn how movie phone discontinued in 2014 is still a reference in a comedy bit, press 2. To start the late show, press 3. Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight stephen welcomes Norah Odonnell and musical guests dead and company. Featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen nice. Thank you very much. Hey, everybody. Please have a seat, ladies and gentlemen, too kind its friday friday thank you opinion welcome, welcome, welcome, one and all, to the late show. I i am so, so pleased and honored to be your host, Stephen Colbert. Well, it is friday. cheers and applause you cant control them. Its a friday audience. You cant control them. Theyre like wild horses. And you know, Everybody Knows what friday means there is more Sexual Harassment news. Unfortunately, thats also
What are you going as . The problem with that is, little kids change their minds every 11 seconds. You can order a paw patrol costume and then she wants to go as mcstuffins. I have two older kids so i know this. But my wife didnt. So the other day she asked our daughter jane, what do you want to be . And she said i dont want to be a princess for halloween. I want to be wonder woman. I need a cape. Now first of all, no one ever mentioned being a princess. I have no idea where she got that. And even though he wonder woman does not wear a cape, we were excited. Because you know, wonder woman is tough. We ordered the costume on amazon and four seconds later it arrives at our house. [ laughter ] we open the box and you know, we showed it to her. Heres your wonder woman costume. Do you want to try it on . She said no, i dont wonder. Im not wonder woman. Im jane. I dont wonder. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] now were wondering what the hell were going to do for a costume. My older daugh