pressure about why she didn t admit the affair from the beginning. i did not want to united states of america to know that i had an affair. i made a mistake. you made a lot of mistakes so far in this case. but i sure have. yes, i have. was killing your has been one of those mistakes? no, it wasn t. but you should ve got a divorce but you didn t? no, i didn t want to get divorced. you were so composed. someone in the like an ice princess. i think i was in shock when. i was overwhelmed by the media attention. i was raised, my whole life, not to be a crybaby. not to be overly dramatic, or anything like that. of course, when i was by myself, later on in the night, i d be crying, when i was rewatching the coverage. it was upsetting. from defense attorney, marxists point of view, pamela was more arrested development, then ice queen. she seemed more like a 14, 15 year old, playing the part