that it doesn t get infected. i want out. i m not against risk-taking, but i want to control the amount of risk that i m willing to take. and at this point i didn t have that control. we re dropping into a section of river with unknown vertical gorges. we don t know what s around any corner, but we just have to do it because there s no other way to get to the lz. not only are you playing this life-or-death chess match against the river, you re also trying to do battle with the demons that have really developed in all of us that said, you might not even make it to the lz.
starting to close in. and, yeah, we don t want to get boxed out in here. so fingers crossed we can work down this boxed canyon at river level. there s only one way to know, and it s to kind of commit into this canyon. but it s scary, [ bleep ]. that s one of the reasons that we re here doing this river and other people haven t, is we have to drop into these gorges where we don t know how well we re going to be able to retreat. you don t know until you go, and hopefully you don t go too far. we had no other choice but to put nouri and i in our kayaks and just hope that one of us was going to get through. if you swim and you lose gear, it s game over. i don t even know what would happen.
and, yeah, we don t want to get boxed out in here. so fingers crossed we can work down this box canyon at river level. there s only one way to know, and it s to kind of commit into this canyon. but it s scary [ bleep ]. that s one of the reasons that we re here doing this river and other people haven t, is we have to drop into these gorges where we don t know how well we re going to be able to retreat. you don t know until you go, and hopefully you don t go too far. we had no other choice but to put nouria and i in our kayaks and just hope that one of us was going to get through. if you swim and you lose gear, it s game over. like i don t even know what would happen.
i want out. i m not against risk-taking, but i want to control the amount of risk that i m willing to take. and at this point, i didn t have that control. we re dropping into a section of river with unknown vertical gorges. we don t know what s around any corner, but we just have to do it because there s no other way to get to the lz. not only are you playing this life-or-death chess match against the river, you re also trying to do battle with the demons that have really developed in all of us that said, you might not even make it to the lz.