For which 2yearolds are so famous . Hello. Im joanne hendrick, the author of the whole child and your guide to this video series. In this program, were going to look at some of the important components that go into providing consistent, oneonone relationships with infants and toddlers in group settings. Well observe some infant and toddler programs in private Childcare Centers, University Lab schools, and family daycare homes, and well hear from infant and toddler teachers who offer practical advice for working with our youngest children. Ready . Go joanne despite the growing need for infant day care, most of us begin our caregiving careers with very little or no training when it comes to taking care of babies. Lets check it and see if its too hot. Joanne but you cant just wing it with infants. Theyre too sensitive and vulnerable for that. All ready for ya. All ready. Look at zack. Get him. Hey, you. Joanne caring for infants requires more than a love for babies. Hi. Hi. You going to talk to me . Can you talk to me . Joanne group care for infants requires a genuine commitment to developing special skills and knowledge. Thats the one that comes in september . August. August. Thats right. Right, ashley . Youre going to be here in august. Can i hold you for a minute . Continuing the family legacy. Joanne it also requires a commitment to sustain caring, affectionate relationships with each baby and their family. No. No . She says no. Ha ha ha hey, how are you . You happy to be here . In a few years, youll be sitting on that chair and singing. Right . Joanne in infant daycare settings, it is the quality of our relationships that determines the quality of care. Why do you think such a consistent, longterm relationship is so important to an infants development . Babies need a steady, consistent, small group of people to whom they can relate. It takes lots of time and consistent contact for babies to intimately know and trust caregivers outside the family circle. In order for this kind of meaningful relationship and bonding to develop, its especially important that our infant Toddler Group sizes remain small. A small group size one adult to 3 or 4 infants is most frequently recommended ensures that we are available to satisfy each infants needs for attention and affection, not to mention the need for routine care as feeding, bathing, and changing. Woman its so different to work with infants and toddlers instead of preschoolers. First of all, i notice that the rhythm slows way down. You have to be much more relaxed, and you really have to be there physically, so you have to feel comfortable being down on the floor a lot and being much more flexible and open to whats going to be happening during the day. You cant plan out all your activities. At the same time, you have to provide consistency for the babies. You know, you have to make sure that theyre being fed regularly and changed regularly, that they have naps. But you have to be flexible about it, so it takes a certain amount of sensitivity where youre really paying attention to each baby and what theyre doing, what theyre interested in at that moment, how you can relate to them. Are you tired now . Are you tired now . Are you tired . Huh . Huh . Hi. What do you see . What do you see . [baby laughs] what do you see . Joanne babies come into the world ready for relationships. Woman youre giggling. Youre giggling. [baby crying] woman rachel. Joanne they tell us how they feel and what they need through their expressions, body movements, and by cooing, babbling, and crying. [crying] joanne crying is one of the main ways babies communicate. No matter how irritating this can be at times, we must remember that they dont cry to annoy us. They cry to tell us that they want or need something to happen a diaper change. A bottle. A nap. A hug. Hey, buddy. Hey, buddy. You see zack . Hey, you. Get your feet. Joanne and lets keep in mind that each baby has his own personality and style of communication. This is what makes infant care so interesting. Just as each babys personality and temperament varies, so must our responses. There is no single right way to respond to all infants. Woman infants communicate in so many ways. I dont think its just verbal, either. Its so much more. Its listening to music and singing. Its going for walks and pointing things out and showing them Different Things in their environment. Its. Its going down to the gross motor area and playing and just seeing the joy that they have on their faces and them talking to you and talking to them. Its going to the art room, even though theyre infants, and just showing them around, and, um, just showing its just not verbal. Its showing them their environment. I think babies need a lot of comfort and calmness. Babies are going to sense your stress or your hurrying through an activity, and i think if you are very calm with them, then they will be more calm. They will sense your feelings. Watch amy. Watch amy. Joanne routine caregiving tasks such as feeding, diaperchanging, and pottytraining provide nottobemissed opportunities for affectionate, onetoone contact with each little one. But this stimulation should not be overdone. Too much stimulation, such as bright lights, too many children in a group, or constant noise overwhelms infants. They need an atmosphere of peace and tranquility in order to truly thrive. [quiet music playing] look. Look. Whats on the wall . Whats on the wall, sean . Butterflies . See butterflies . See butterflies . See the doggy . Doggy, sean . Do you see the doggy, sean . Joanne lets look at the interaction in this nursery. What do you see happening here that maximizes communication between caregiver and child . Okeydoke. Oh, there you go. There you go. Did you notice how the caregiver used a simple, routine task like diaperchanging as a time to really focus on the baby . Did you notice how the infant responded to both the caregivers chatting and actions . And did you see how carefully she allowed time for the baby to respond to her . Here are some other tips for how to handle routine care in the nursery. While keeping routines reasonably predictable, lets feed, put to nap, and change our infants as needed and not as dictated solely by a schedule. Hold each baby during bottlefeeding rather than leave a baby sitting or lying alone to fend for himself with a proppedup bottle. Cuddling babies while feeding is important because babies need to be nurtured in spirit while being nurtured in body. Sanitizing measures and handwashing are essential before and after feeding, diapering, and toileting. Follow strict universal precautions, such as wearing latex gloves, when touching or handling bodily fluids. Joanne notice how this caregiver is careful to wash her hands after diapering to help prevent the spread of infection and disease. This is a vital Health Precaution in every childcare setting, but especially so when working with infants, who require frequent changes. Speaking of illness and infection, babies in group care, despite our best efforts, tend to get sick more often than they would at home. For one thing, their immunities to Infectious Disease are just beginning to build. Also, for the first time, they are in close, intimate contact with other infants and adults, all of whom pass on germs. As caregivers of infants and toddlers, we must follow Stringent Health and safety measures, so lets remember to disinfect toys and surfaces on a daily basis. Make sure we as well as our children wash hands frequently and establish clear illness policies which keep contagious children and adults away from the nursery. Of course, we follow the universal precautions in our infant rooms. That goes from washing our hands when we come in the classroom, washing our hands after each diaper change. The toys that go in the mouth, we have whats called the hobart, which washes all the toys, and we put those aside after we notice that theyve been in the mouth. Washing the kids hands after each diaper change is very important. That teaches them from when they do go from the infant to toddler room. You know, that prepares them to go on. Put on some soap. Scrub, scrubby. Scrub, scrub, scrub. Woman with the small children, we will be there and wash our hands with them if they need help, you know. I mean, well rub their hands. Well make it into a game. Its like, lets see who can make the most bubbles, or, um. Anything like that. So, i mean, you turn it into a game, and not i mean, children love water. I mean, you cant get them away from it naturally, so this time, you just add soap and they just stay a little longer and their hands get cleaned. Joanne building strong relationships with each childs family is especially important during these very early years. Daily communication is the foundation for a trusting relationship between us and the family. To build truly solid relationships with the children in our care, its important to learn from the experiences, knowledge, culture, and childrearing beliefs of the family. Effective communication can be maintained through friendly, daytoday contact during arrival and departure times, and written notes, telephone calls, and scheduled meetings help, too. Tell mama to have a nice day. And then you can go play. Yeah. Do you want to play . Joanne just as with any age group, sooner or later, we will eventually encounter infants and toddlers with special or exceptional needs. So, what do we do . And where do we start . Actually, our approach to these children is pretty much the same as with the other children. Our goal is, whenever we can, to meet the individual needs of every youngster. Steph, can you take over so i can go to lunch . All youre going to do is keep it real close to him. Ok. For children with special needs, this may involve careful supervision of daily routines, such as adapting for a child with severe allergies or using a special nipple for a child whose cleft palate is undergoing repair. The important thing to remember when working with infants or toddlers who have special needs is that we make sure we get correct medical advice or other kinds of information from knowledgeable specialists and family members. Can you both work it out . No way. Who told you that . Wah, wah, wah, wah. Joanne babies love to hear language and to respond by cooing, babbling, and making sounds that gradually resemble adult speech. [crying] really . It was that rough, huh . And what hurt . Did your tummy hurt, or did your ear hurt . Joanne throughout the first two years, children are attaching meaning to words and understanding a lot more than they can say. So the more attention we pay to our childrens speech, the more we can understand, repeat, and use words from their own language. Try this one. No. No . No. Mine. [squeals] what do you say to charlie . Say, mine. Thats mine. Joanne we can also give them new words to expand their language, thus giving them a richer, more expressive vocabulary to use later on. Woman how about. Oh, wow, charlie. Thanks a lot. [toy jingling] joanne young infants need many opportunities to explore their world through the senses of sight, sound, smell, and touch. [waltzing matilda playing] this includes stacking and nesting toys, objects they can put in and out of boxes, and push pull toys to encourage walking. As infants develop and begin to crawl and then walk, they seem to get into everything. Thats why a safe environment is so essential. From the childs perspective, if its in view, its interesting, and if its in reach, it will be investigated. So lets remember to keep all medicines and cleaning supplies in locked cabinets, keep electrical outlets covered, keep small objects out of reach, and conduct daily indoor and outdoor safety inspections. I think one good rule of thumb isit sounds strange, but actually get on the level of, maybe, a baby that is crawling and look and see because its very different. You dont think about things until youre down there, so then when youre on that level, youre going to see more things, such as cupboards making sure that all cleaning supplies are out of reach or locked. The safety locks on doors are a very good thing. Think about corners for tables. Are the corners rounded so that theyre not going to bump their heads . Think about stairs. Are the stairs padded . Are the stairs low . Are they safe . You might want to just eliminate that altogether, always having a gate for a long flight of stairs and making sure that gate is secure. I know some Childcare Centers such as ours have a door that leads to stairs, so you need to make sure that signs are posted that that door remain shut. And think about where the door handle is, that its out of the childs reach and or theres a safety handle on that door. Woman whats this . No joanne toddlers spend a lot of their time concerned with who they are and with whos in charge. Independence, selfassertion, and controlor the lack of it are central issues at this young and tender age. A toddlers day often involves conflict, most often in the form of whats mine and whats yours. They seem driven to want to have their own way. Lets keep in mind that when a toddler wants something, he typically wants it intensely and immediately. Thats the way toddlers are. No no no no joanne but we can help reduce the amount of conflict by looking at our program through the childs eyes. Are there enough materials and equipment to go around . Does each child have enough time and space to fully explore . Are there many small, appropriate opportunities for him to make choices and decisions . Opportunities such as do you want an orange or a banana for a snack . When toddlers dont get what they want, tempers often flare, emotions run high, and frequently, the situation ends up out of control. Tell him its your grocery cart. Mymy grocery. Dale. Dale. You know what, dale . Theres one over here. Joanne children can be frightened by the violence of their own feelings and actions, and they rely on us to remain calm. We can help our toddlers work through problems if we remember to stay calm. In simple language, say what the limits are and what will happen if the rules are not followed. Get down to the childrens level and maintain eye contact. Let them know youre there to help them work through those intense feelings. Dont preach. Avoid long lectures, but make sure each child is kept out of harms way. Offer many simple opportunities for appropriate choices, and use distraction when possible by offering substitute toys or activities. It looks like zack still wants to use it, chuck. Zack still wants to use it, chuck. I want to share it. Well, it doesnt look like he wants to share it, and you have this great cart right here with mr. Bunny in it. What can we use this for, though . Lets see. Let me take a look at this and see what this is for. What could we use this for . Look at this, chuck. What could we use that for . Feel that. Do you feel what that feels like . Did you feel that, chuck . Whats that feel like . Well take these out. We should take them out . Ok. Well, you know what, friends . You have to let go of this to take them out. Were just going to take these out. Ok. You let go, you let go, and lets take these out. How can we get those out of that bucket . We could dump them. We could dump them no. No [screaming] shh listen. Use your words. Emilio, come here. Dont touch it. Hes going to pick it up. You need to listen to his words, and you need hes going to pick it up. You need to pick it up, please, right now. Pick it all up. Pick it up. Pick up all the things that were in the basket right now, please. All right . Have you used your words yet . Patty when a toddler is completely throwing a tantrum and refuses to listen say its putting on your jacket to go outside again, this is where the importance of a relationship and paying attention to each individual child comes into play, because you have to quickly assess, in the heat of this battle, what the appropriate response is. For some children, you just leave them alone and ignore them. You make sure theyre away from the other children. You put them in a safe space and you say, ok. Right now you are not cooperating, so you cant go outside right now. When youre ready to come back and talk to me, you let me know. And you dont go too far away. You dont want to be punitive about it. And also, its very scary for a toddler to lose control of their emotions, so you have to be supportive, too, without caving in, and so, again, it just takes very simple statements. You cant go outside until youve put your jacket on, or, i cant let you hurt the other children. Youll have to stay here until youre ready to play safely. And you just repeat it calmly down at their level. Look them in the eye. Let them know youre there for them, and you keep repeating it. Also, redirection helps a lot. Try and find Something Else that they can get engaged in so they forget about the power struggle that they want to have with you. Joanne providing quality care for infants and toddlers is no easy task. Lets review some of the key points weve covered on this program to help ease the way. Weve learned. 1sustained, consistent, caring relationships are critical between caregiver and child. 2its especially important that our infant Toddler Group sizes remain small so we are available to satisfy each infants needs. 3routine caregiving tasks such as feeding, diaperchanging, and pottytraining provide excellent opportunities for verbal and nonverbal communication as well as for individualized attention for each child. 4daily communication with family members is essential. 5we can help reduce the amount of conflict with our toddlers by making sure there are enough materials and equipment to go around and that we provide many opportunities for children to assert themselves by making simple choices. 6when toddlers begin to lose control, keep yours. Stay calm. 7in simple language, say what the limits are and what will happen if the rules are not followed. The hallmarks of good infant care are really quite simple and basic. Our job is to help instill a sense of trust, safety, and comfort in our infants and toddlers by responding with affection and respect to the needs and wants of each individual child in our care. If we can do that, then we can leave work each day knowing that weve given our infants and toddlers a Wonderful Foundation and head start as they set out on their journey to becoming a whole child. Im joanne hendrick. See you next time on the whole child. Woman knowing what a young child is feeling is not always easy. No matter what parents or other caregivers do, sometimes children still feel sad, anxious, or angry. Helping children cope while they are dealing with feelings, next time on the whole child. Captioning performed by the national captioning institute, inc. Funding for this program was provided by. Could you use ither, in a sentence, please . Ipc. In the unlikely event that your Brokerage Firm goes out of business, sipc is there to protect you. Sipc. Ci [ buzzer ] im sorry, christopher, that is incorrect. Lisa fannon. Lisa, your word also is sipc. May i have that in another sentence, please . Sipc funds are available to satisfy brokerage customer claims up to a maximum of 500,000, including up to 100,000 for cash claims. Sipc. Sip. K. [ buzzer ] dont know about sipc, the Securities Investor Protection corporation . Thats okay, we can spell it out for you. Learn more at www. Sipc. Org. Funding for this program was provided by. Joanne hendrick isnt it wonderful when our day begins with such cheerful smiles and happy faces . And dont we wish it could always be like this . But in order for that to happen, we must remember thatt takes a lot of patience combined with good judgment and warm, nurturing relationships to raise emotionally healthy, comfortable, and cheerful children. Of course, some days are going to be better than others and some even worse. Its just a fact. No matter what we do, children are still going to feel sad, afraid, anxious, and angry from time to time. Its all part of growing up and learning to cope with their feelings. Hello. Im joanne hendrick, the author of the whole child and your host for this series. On this program, our focus is Emotional Health, and our challenge is to learn how to help children cope with their feelings and express them in socially acceptable ways ways that dont harm others and that are appropriate to the childs age and abilities ways that contribute to building the childs Emotional Health. [child crying] hendrick we dont have to be psychiatrists to Foster Mental Health in children. Or in anyone else, for that matter. What its really about is relationships. Give me another kiss. Give her a kiss. Byebye. Mamas going to come back later, ok . Say bye, ma. Ok. Shh. Is that mamas car, or did she park in the parking lot . I think she already went to work. Yeah. Hendrick genes and their contribution to temperament are important, too, but we cant do anything about them, so we might as well concentrate on what we can do something about, and thats the relationship between us and the children we care for. Why do you think that is so important . Are your tears all gone . Yeah. Ok. Come on. Teacher youre going to make a picture for mommy . Ok. Come on. Ill sit with you. Here. Well use this piece of paper. Youre going to take care of her for me, jacqueline . Do you want to see if she wants to make a picture with you . Here. What picture would you like to do . Youre just being shy today, arent you . Hendrick without trust, its impossible to feel safe or close or comfortable with someone. Teacher who do you think is going to show up next . Come here, baby. Zack, come on. Oh ho ho yay look at you. Hendrick our need to experience trust and have it reaffirmed remains with us throughout our lives, but the basic balance between trust and mistrust is tipped very early in favor of one attitude or the other. Zack, im so proud of you. What a big boy you are. Uhoh, uhoh, uhoh. [crying] oh. Hendrick trust has its roots in infancy when babies gain confidence that they can depend on the grownups around them to meet their basic needs. [crying] hendrick thats why demand feeding is so important. The baby finds out that when hes feeling miserable, he can count on someone to help him feel better without having to wait an eternity for warmth and comfort. Youre frightened, huh . Its ok. Are you getting hungry . Ok. Hendrick from a babys perspective, reasonably prompt and consistent care is an essential ingredient in developing trust. Babies wonder. When we are hungry, can we count on someone to feed us . [crying] woman youre scared. Come here. Its ok. Hendrick when we are upset and start to cry, will someone be there to comfort us . Oh. Its ok. Hey, baby. Hey, baby girl. Hendrick when we are wet, is someone there to change us . What are you smiling about, huh . Hendrick when the answer to these questions are yes, babies develop trust, confidence. Confidence that others will help them when they need help and trust in themselves, as well confidence they can get what they want when they need it. This helps them feel valued and important. There we go, huh . Although the need to experience trust begins in infancy, it remains with us all our lives, so the next thing to think about is how we can maintain that wonderful, trustful feeling as children continue to grow. What can we do to help build trust in our children . What kind of opportunities do you think we can provide . One of the easiest ways to build trust is by maintaining an orderly routine to the day so the children can predict whats going to happen next. Consistent rules and policies that children understand also adds to their sense of trust, and the same thing goes for our behavior. Thank you, baby. I dont want to go potty. I dont want to wash my hands. Look. You need to wash your hands, ok . Do you want someone to help you . Hendrick predictability is the key. When we maintain our selfcontrol and dont fly off the handle too readily, we encourage the children to trust us. The children can predict what our responses will be, and this breeds confidence in the relationship and keeps them from feeling too anxious. Teacher i just told you. This is it. Teacher no. Its all gone. Thank you, big girl, for being my good listener. Thank you. Teacher stevie jay, books are for reading. Do you remember . Girl this one. Teacher ok. Just one moment. Hendrick what else do you think would work . Children will feel more confident with us if they know we dont expect too much or too little from them. Its so important to remember that rules and tasks should be appropriate for the childs age and abilities. For example, with 2yearolds, its best to stick to simple rules and immediate consequences and save those longer discussions and multiple choices to use with the 4s and 5s. Clean up. Right. Clean up, please. Teacher, voiceover when the children come into school, they need the sense of security that a routine gives them. They know theyre going to have snack next and then it will be their chance to choose their own toys and then it will be group time. I think one of the most important things i do to Foster Mental Health is create a very warm and nurturing environment in my classroom. I feel one of my primary goals is to make the children stay very happy and for the children to, you know, have a very positive feeling about school. What do you need . We got to cook that cheese. Cook it . Teacher, voiceover we like the children to come in, and they let me know what they need. They let me know i want to read a book today. I want to paint today. Theyre making their decisions. This is making them a healthy person. A child that has the opportunity to explore their environment, a child that has the opportunity to make mistakes and not be criticized for them, a child that has the opportunity to investigate, to label, to be creative. Which is what we hope we offer. Child theyre coming this way. Yikes good morning, miss marty. Hi, buddy. Give miss marty a hug. How are you . Hows ryan coming along . Really well. Hes doing great. He had a real good day yesterday. Very good. Yes. Right . And today were talking about the color yellow. Hendrick there is one more kind of trust we must Pay Attention to. Thats the trust that should exist between ourselves and the families of the children we care for. Remember . What does the red say . Ill guide you. You have to wheel yourself. Ha ha ha woman you better follow me, girl. Follow yvonne. Hendrick this connection, this bond, is vitally important for all the children but especially important for famies with children who have disabilities. We must never underestimate their special sensitivities and concerns. We must honor those feelings not only by being kind and encouraging, but also by being truthful about their childs abilities. Child im here. Teacher oh, hold on. Dont come in front of the swing. Child im not in the front of the swing. Teacher excuse me. Youre right in the front of the swing. Lets go this way. This way, this way. Girl hes right in the front of the swing. Hendrick i really admire people who live with and teach 2yearolds. 2yearolds are so different from those smiley, cuddly infants and triumphant beginning walkers. Suddenly the toddler is transformed into an assertive, willful 2yearold. We just have to remind ourselves that this drive toward independence and selfassertion is an important stage of emotional development. Granted, living in the 2yearold world of mine and no and me do it isnt easy. It takes a lot of patience to maintain limits when necessary and independence when thats possible. Teacher youre not ready yet, huh . No. Well, i can wait a few minutes. You might miss snack, though. Come on out withour power saw so i can see where your body is, ok . Hendrick its like waing on a tightrope. You dont want to crush their spirits, but you dont want to live with a tyrant either. Its kind of a balancing act of avoiding confrontations when you can, insisting on doing things your way when thats necessary, and providing as many choices for the child to make as possible. Put it up there. You decided. There you go. Child so no one take it. Ok. No one will take it. Child i had 2 muffins. 2 muffins . Is that why youre not very hungry today . Hmm . Do you want more corn . Hendrick if we just think about it a little, there are lots of choices that can be offered, even to 2 or 3yearolds, but remember, these are limited choices, not do you want to put on a sweater . But which sweater . Not do you want to have snack . But where do you want to sit for snack . Teacher jordan, where would you like to go first today . Hendrick this is why selfselection of activities is such a valuable par of the preschool day. Teacher want me to tell you the choices again . Were going to look at seeds in this room. Hendrick when children are expected to choose for themselves what they want to do, they have endless opportunities for making decisions that are ageappropriate and that allow them to exercise that independence that matters so much to them at that age. Teacher what would you like to do . Hendrick 4 and 5yearolds especially need to reach out to the world and become more connected to their groups. They want to investigate things, make plans, and carry them out. My turn [computer beeping] my turn. After you, can i have a turn . You already had a turn. Well, you were going to have another turn after me. Hendrick learning to take this initiative becomes the next step in their emotional development. What kinds of things can we do to help them take that step . [children laughing] we want to encourage them to seize that initiative and think things up, try things out, and enjoy the emotional satisfactions that come from the delightful experience of exploring and doing things with their friends. Another way to think about giving choices is to consider what happens when children dont have those opportunities. What happens when we create a climate that minimizes or takes away the chance to make decisions . In a spirited child, this can lead to struggle after struggle. In less spirited ones, it can produce feelings of inadequacy and loss of selfconfidence. In extreme cases, it can even lead to a feeling of hopelessness. Teacher ok. Where are you working at . What area . Hendrick by allowing children to make their own choices and decisions and be responsible for their own outcomes, were setting the framework for strong, emotionally healthy lives. Will you please push her . All right. Well, you know what . Is that something we climb . Yes or no . No. Because why not . Is it safe for us to climb on there . No. If you want to climb, theres a climber right over there that you can climb on or down there. Hendrick but lets rember that not everything is a choice. Part of becoming a mentally healthy person is learning how to accept that reality, too. Sometimes the answer is just plain no. But learning how to cope with disappointments, delays, and setbacks is another critical part of developing healthy, balanced attitudes. Still, a little prevention can go a long way toward satisfying a childs needs while, at the same time, reducing the level and number of disappointments and frustrations. So what can we do to make you feel better . I want to go ask him. Ok. Ill watch your bike while you go ask him one more time. Try some nice words, though. Hendrick for example, its a good policy to make sure there are duplicates of their favorite toys and games. When its snack time, it helps to have the food ready to serve when the children are seated, and its very important to make as few demands as possible when you sense theyre tired or hungry. Such advanced planning means less frustration for you and for them. Teacher no rice . Pass it down to valadia, please. Hendrick of course, nobodys perfect, and its impossible to handle every situation perfectly. Children are more resilient than we give them credit for being. If our relationship with them is basically warm, steady, and fair, we will all survive occasional mistakes. Dont be unduly hesitant about handling difficult situations. If you feel things are slipping out of control, wait a minute, take a breath, tell the child you need time to think, and then return to the action. One of the most valuable skills we can give our children is how to express strong emotions without hurting themselves or others or damaging property. But how can we do that . How can we teach them to talk about feelings instead of impulsively acting them out . Right here no i dont want to hendrick what we want our children to learn is. We can begin by communicating with the child in a nonjudgmental way, showing her we understand how she feels. This kind of understanding requires us to get down to the childs level, eye to eye, and listen intently, not just hearing the words, but sensing what the childs body is telling us, too. Teacher ok. Marley, can joel have a turn when youre finished . He throwed me down, and he grabbed it from me. Teacher uhoh. Did you grab it from jessica . We ask. We say, may i have it, please . We dont take it from her. Thats ok. [boy crying] oh, i know it feels bad, but you wait. Wait for your turn. Hendrick then we have to teach the child how to communicate those feelings to others. Perhaps hes angry or feeling sad because someone wont let him play, or perhaps he wants something so badly, he cant wait another minute for it. Whatever the cause, the first thing to do is to put those feelings into words. Name that feeling. Sometimes children can pick up on this advice, and sometimes they cant. When thats the case, the next thing to do is model it. Say the sentence out loud so the child can see how to do it. Say something like, i really would like to sock you, im so mad at you. I had it first. You give it back right now. Or i want that lion real badly. After that recognition and expression of feeling, then its time to go on and suggest some ways of helping the child get what she wants in a less emotionally charged way. Lets recap what weve learned about responding to situations involving strong emotions. First, teach the child. Feel what you want, but control what you do. This kind of understanding requires us to get down to the childs level, eye to eye, and listen intently. Encourage the child to say the feelings out loud and to tell the other person how he feels. Name that feeling. If the child is too young or inexperienced to know what to say, model a simple sentence for him to copy. Finally. Do whatever else is necessary to resolve the situation. Teacher what do you say to charlie . Say, mine. Thats mine. Yeah. Shes really sad, charlie. Im worried about that. Teacher, voiceover in this classroom, i prefer the children to use words. In fact, we encourage them. We do a lot of encouragement because if they do all this hollering and stomping, we dont know why theyre doing that. And i have one in particular in the afternoona little boy and when he cant have his way or if he wants a particular toy that somebody else is using, he does the stomping of the feet, he does the hollering and the yelling, and we will go to that child and say, what is it that you want . Why are you doing all this hollering . Tell me the reason. And hell just sort of look at you and, um. I says, i need some words because if you do all this hollering and screaming, miss garcia does not know what you want, nor does miss washington, nor do the other children. So if you dont tell us what you want, well never know. So we encourage a lot of verbal expression, and then they sort of stop the hollering, they stop the screaming, and once they come up with the words, they seem to calm themselves down, too. Children arent the only ones who lose their tempers, of course. We do, too. The question is, how do you handle your anger . The first thing to remember is that the same rules that apply to children also apply to us feel what you want, but control what you do. We might as well admit it. You cant fool children by denying youre upset or angry or frightened, for that matter. They always know. Even babies know. So its better to be upfront and simply admit it. Of course, this doesnt give us license to lose our temper or explode or show physical anger to our children. Such reactions will only scare young children. Teacher there. Jessicas covering hers up. Hendrick so far, weve covered some of the basic skills that help promote Mental Health. Now lets look at some signs that a child is doing all right. Is the child working on emotional tasks that are appropriate for his age or ability . Teacher see what happens when youre pulling the toys away from your friend . Is that yours . Hendrick for example, if hes 2 1 2, is he asserting himself from time to time . Teacher here. Take the yellow one. Hendrick and if hes 4, is he interested in the larger world around him . Teacher oh, is she kissing . Ok. Give me a kiss and a hug and give nick a kiss. Oh. Ok. Say see you. Hendrick is the child able to separate from the family without undue stress and form an attachment with at least one other adult at school . Of course, this takes time. Comfortable separation isnt something we expect to happen overnight, and it tends to be harder for younger children or children who are developmentally delayed. Teacher asan, put this on the table. Take that to your table. Both hands. Right here. Youre going to slice that one. Slice it up. Hendrick is the child learning to conform to routin at School Without undue fuss . Once again, a certain amount of testing mostly by 4yearolds and balkiness mostly by 2s is par for the course. But healthy children dont make a career out of doing this. Teacher im thirsty, too. Yes, i am. Heres his cup. Hendrick is the child able to involve herself deeply in play . Play is not only the work of children; its the greatest Health Promoter and vehicle for learning thats available to them. You have to eat two first. Teacher we have to eat two first . Teacher and child lion. Zebra. Child i saw that. Hendrick can the child settle down and concentrate . Being able to focus attention on something that interests a youngster is a good indicator hes doing well because it means hes capable of learning. Unless you can focus, you dont have time to take things in and to think about them. Teacher in the zoo . Child yeah. Teacher wow. What are those . Rhinoceros . Different teacher chardonne, you need to use your words. Thats not ok. Thats not ok hendrick and finally, does the child have access to the full range of her feelings, and is she learning to deal with them in an ageappropriate way . This is one of the most important indicators of Emotional Health because its only when the child is aware of all her feelings and can express them without harming herself or others that she is truly a whole child. Child no. No you got to share. You got to share. Teacher you have to share. Hes going to mess up my horsy hendrick when children seem to have special difficulties, we need to remember we dont have to solve every emotional problem that comes up by ourselves. When feeling puzzled, get some help. No youll mess up my horsy im sorry. I didnt mean to mess up your horsy. Hendrick its so important to communicate with the child, with the family, and with our peers. Communication is the key to sound Mental Health the childs and for us, too. Lets briefly review the Building Blocks of sound Mental Health in children. Weve learned that more than anything, young people look to us for consistent, dependable, trustworthy relationships. Children feel the most comfortable when it feels like everything is under control. Thats why its so important to have orderly routines in our classrooms with consistent rules and policies. Children need opportunities to think for themselves and, whenever possible, be able to make their own choices. And finally. Young people, like the rest of us, need to be able to express their feelings in a safe and appropriate manner. Taking care of children can be an awesome responsibility, but lets not let our fear of making mistakes hold us hostage. We all make mistakes. Real learning is about recognizing them and discovering new ways to take a more effective, successful approach next time. And trust me, there will always be a next time. Lets be patient with our children. But while were at it, lets consider our own Mental Health. Lets be patient and forgiving with ourselves. See you next time on the whole child. Great things can happen when children feel good about themselves, but it takes an adult to help create those feelings. How to develop selfesteem so a child can say, im glad im me. Next time on the whole child. Find the yellow paint and make yellow stars over here. I was talking to him. She wasnt finish with that, ok . So what do we need to do . Will you let marley finish her turn, please . Would you like a turn with the bike . Ok. Marley, can joel have a turn when youre finished . Girl can you push me all the way to gavin . All the way to gavin . I suppose. Where is gavin at . Funding for this program was provided by. Welcome to another session of beliefs and believers. Were of course in the midst of talking about islam and asking islam to help us understand doctrine and ethics and social dimension. And in this class i keep saying we have extraordinary classes, but indeed we do today were going to look at the Africanamerican Muslim movement, sometimes called the black muslim movement, nation of islam. And were just absolutely thrilled later in this class, we have imam wd mohammed, who will come in and handle not just questions about Africanamerican Muslim movement, but islam in