laughter yeah, graphics, man yeah just in, guys. The middle east is still awful. President obama confirmed that he will send an additional 250 american troops to syria. Larry 250 troops . That seems low. Thats like 50 below the minimum to even make a movie about this. Whats next . Are they going to go on 40 first dates . But the number isnt the thing that seems off here. Its the language. Gayle king said troops, but obama said something else. Ive approved the deployment of up to 250 additional u. S. Personnel in syria. Larry personnel . What, are they sending 250 stans from accounting . Hey, i. S. I. S. , hope you like paperwork although he seems to modify personnel in the rest of his sentence. Ive approved the development ive approved the deployment of up to 250 additional u. S. Personnel in syria, including special forms, to keep up this special forces to keep up this momentum. Larry including special forces. So you have a bunch of stans, mixed in with some seal team sixers . So theyre not troops, theyre personnel with some special forces. Okay, what else . The 250 special forces expands the u. S. Presence from 50 commandos to 300 inside syria. Larry oh, wait. So all the personnel are special forces, and theyre going to be joining 50 dudes going commando . Okay, this is getting confusing. According to obama, were not sending any troops, its just 250 Personnel Special forms who 250 Personnel Special forces who are joining 50 others who are sans underwear. Got it. But what exactly is their mission . Theyre not going to be leading the fight on the ground, but they will be essential in proving the training and assisting local forces as they continue to drive i. S. I. L back. Larry got it. The special forces are not fighting, theyre just there cheering the guys on, kind of advising. And thats it. Were not sending anybody else to the region, right . The announcement comes just days after the president deployed another 200 advisors to help fight i. S. I. S. In iraq. Larry wait, the advisors are the ones that are fighting . So special forces are advising in syria while advisors are fighting in iraq. Why does this have to be so confusing . I know this is your last year, but obama, are you smoking weed again . Why couldnt you just say were sending troops to go help fight . Is it because of what candidate obama said . It is the first thing i will do. I will get our troops home. We will bring an end to this war. You can take that to the bank. Larry actually, back then, we couldnt take anything to the bank. Not a good fortuneteller, that obama and that was also a time when obama was a lover, not a fighter. So hes got to find a way to engage in this fight, but he cant be too obvious when hes telling the American People that were engaging in a fight. First thing you gotta do is tell them how bad a problem it is. Right now, the most urgent threat to our nation is i. S. I. L. These terrorists are doing everything in their power to strike our cities and kill our citizens so we need to do everything in our power to stop them. Larry i wouldnt classify 250 people barely enough to pack a comedy club as everything in our power. applause why is it so hard . Now, the language of war is not only confusing, the nonwar war itself is confusing. So im gonna break it down for you in a new segment were calling explaining complex stuff using the latest and most accessible culture references. Tonight, were using game of thrones and beyonces lemonade. So heres the thing. Syria is westeros, a wartorn country ruled by rich assholes who murder their own people. Thats assad. There are two main groups who want regime change. Lets call the first one angry rebels. Represented by beyonce. And, boy, those are some angry Ground Forces rebelling right there. The other main group who wants regime change is i. S. I. S. , i. E. , the white walkers. Because theyre scary as bleep and at some point, everyones going to have to dole with them. Assad is bolstered by putin, obviously represented here by jayz. Right . Yes, yes, yes because he and beyonce seem to be in an open war against each other, and thats making everyone uncomfortable. Beyonce is in her black power phase, so, of course, shes also at war with the white walkers. You know what im sayin, right . Now, the United States is khaleesi because shes across the ocean and has superior air power shes been unwilling to use so far. But khaleesi is funding beyonce by subscribing to tidal to listen to her lemonade album. laughter exactly, exactly. Also, were not getting into a war with jayz because thats a war we probably cant win. Were not stupid. The United Nations is hodor. Big presence but nothing to say, really. Solange knowles is involved in this mess somehow, but its not clear how. She may have killed jon snow for breaking his vows. Nobody really knows. laughter and rachel ray is turkey. She got pulled into a flame war that has nothing to do with her except proximity. applause why is she in this . It doesnt make sense and she just wants this thing to end. So there you have it syria perfectly explained through the power of pop culture. applause the fact is, if were gonna defeat i. S. I. S. , we need all hands on deck, and its okay to say that coded language is keeping it 55, and this nation needs obama to keep it 100. Were not little kids. You dont have to spell out sex in front of us. If youre sending troops over that might get bleep , let us know. For more on the language games the Obama Administration is playing, please welcome Senior Pentagon official, energy Major General grouper blueman. applause major, when the president commits these troops to syria, isnt he essentially going back on a promise . Jordan whoa, whoa, whoa, committing troops to syria . Not sure i follow. Larry well, hes sending 250 u. S. Soldiers into syria. Jordan no. I dont know why this is so confusing for everyone. Let me be direct. The president isnt sending troops. Hes initiating a noncombat Expeditionary Force to threat assess and empower solutions as they relate to observable benchmarks in the global struggle against violent extremism. laughter larry can you do me a favor and just say that obama is sending our military into a war zone . jordan war. Zone . Not sure what that is, to be quite honest. Do you mean an unpacified hotspot within a series of perpetually shifting conflict arenas . Larry no, i mean war zones where obama is placing soldiers in harms way jordan okay, larry, this isnt middle earth. Stop making up words like harm and soldiers, when what you mean is that obama is setting up a systemic infrastructure by which enemy fire power may liaise with our peace coordinators anatomies. Larry youre saying they might get shot jordan again, shot, not sure what that is. Look, i really have to get going. Olive garden does not play around with their reservations. Youre five minutes late, and they will cross you off the list. Larry no dont go do not go to olive garden. Yeah. Larry just say the words obama is putting troops in harms way. Just say that, and ill let you go jordan i cant i wont larry say it jordan okay, fine. Obama. Is. Putting. fast hostility advisement ececiasts within range of potentialities involving battlefieldrelated trauma. Larry youre an asshole. Jordan sorry . What are you saying . Larry youre an analcavityadjacent portal specialist advisement supervisor. Jordan oh, screw you, Wilmore Larry Major General grouper blueman, everyone well be right back. There are two billion people who dont have access to basic banking, but that is changing. At temenos, with the microsoft cloud, we can enable a banker to travel to the most remote locations with nothing but a phone and a tablet. Everywhere where theres a phone, you have a bank. Now a person is able to start a business, and employ somebody for the first time. The microsoft cloud helped us to bring banking to ten Million People in just two years. Its transforming our world. These new chipotle thyou got that right. Mmmm. Mmmm. Guys we should do this again next weekend. Any party can be a great party with new tostitos cantina chipotle thins cheers and applause larry welcome back president obama just returned from a fourday trip to europe, where he took care of important business with our foreign allies. He urged britain not to leave the European Union. He met with World Leaders about sending troops to fight i. S. I. S. He met with j. K. Rowling about sending Dumbledores Army to fight i. S. I. S. But ultimately, this was one of obamas last chances to solidify our Foreign Relations at a precarious time for europe and the middle east. So, here with an indepth look on the president s trip, is our very own grace parra. Grace hi cheerpdz grace thanks, larry. Im here in london, where the fashion trends are positively royal. Nightly larry fashion trends . No, grace we sent you to cover obamas big meeting. Grace exactly. With Prince George. Did you see him in that bathrobe . Look at that bathrobe, larry is Prince George the royal familys youngest heir . Or the kingdoms hunkiest new sleepwear model . Nightly larry grace, grace, grace Prince George is a young child. You cant talk to him in that way youre right is he is hare or a sleepwear model . Larry thats still not appropriate is there anything you can tell us about the president s meeting on i. S. I. S. , syria, the migrant crisis. Grace the president talked about all of that with Prince George . Larry no he talked about it with World Leaders such as Angela Merkel and david cameron. Grace first of all, its James Cameron but when it comes to looking fly as hell in a bathrobe, this hunky baby just sunk his titanic. Nightly larry grace, do you at least have any thoughts on whether britain will leave the European Union . Grace oh, um. No. Larry nothing . Grace i do know something about the union of designer loafers on adorable little baby feet. You put that little royal fashion plate on a runway, and all im hearing is gucci gucci goo nightly grace dribble dribble dribble, kobe larry youre not even making sense now grace, please. With all of these global crises, why are you so focused on Prince George . Grace for the same reason that britain still has a royal family sure, they dont do anything. But the problems of the world dont seem so grim when youre looking at lill toddler serving future baby king realness. Admit it. Admit it larry okay, fine hes adorable grace yes babythemed nightly animation larry hey, i got the baby nightly grace parra, everyone. Well be right back. cheers and applause i have a blog called daddy doing work, its funny that ive been in the news for being a dad. Windows 10 is great because i need to keep organized. School, grocery shopping. My face can unlock this computer. Thats crazy. Macbooks are not able to do that. Hey cortana, remind me we have a play date tomorrow at noon i need that in my world. Anything that makes my life easier, im using. And windows is doing that. [basketball video game sounds] gatorade recover. Protein and carbs for athletes. Because the way you recover affects the way you play. cheers and applause larry welcome back. Im here with my panel. First up, the nightly show contributor jordan carlos. cheers and applause the nightly show contributor robin thede. cheers and applause and he stars in how to get away with murder as well as orange is the new black, season 4 premieres june 17th on netflix, actor and activist matt mcgorry. cheers and applause and for everyone at home, june our conversation right now on twitter nightlyshow, using tonightly. Okay, so i want to talk about this. Obama appeared to criticize the black lives matter this past weekend during a town hall meeting in london. While talking about social justice movements, he said, and im paraphrasing here, once youve highlighted an issue and brought it to peoples attention and elected officials are ready to sit down with you, then you cant just keep on yelling at them. It took obama about five minutes just to say that. laughter i think he was speaking up for hillary. Whos had some black lives matter movements. Its like he was saying stop yelling at that scared white lady. Am i wrong . Well, a couple of points off the bat. Obviously, the black lives matter isnt for me or about me. I hope to consider myself an ally to raise awareness for that. cheers and applause its not my place to tell a black man, especially the president of the United States, what he should or shouldnt be saying. I want you to do it anyway. Yeah no, no. I think any movement requires people who are outside who are not going to sort of be political about it, who are going to yell, and thats sort of how we keep people honest. Thats what happened when bill clinton gave his answer to the activists, you know, about the crime bill and, you know, it is important because, you know, i cant say, you know, how angry i would or wouldnt be and, you know, i think some people are there to make the compromises and to be in the room and some people need to do what they need to do. I have a problem with it. I had a problem with obama doing that. Why are you putting b. L. M. s business on front street like that . On fleet street. He could have said that to them through a letter or an email or Something Like that. He just said, theyre just yelling all the time and i dont like that bleep . laughter i guess im not that cynical thinking it was a ploy to help hillary. He said it to bunch of teenagers in londoner. Might as well have been at hogwarts. Didnt have anything to do with hillary. Whos going to yell in england . If you look at the crowd, they were very subdued yes, mr. President , go on. Its almost time for toppens. Things like that. Larry toppens . I have no idea. m thinking clotted cream. Oh, yeah. Lets not get stuck there. Larry he also said you might refuse to meet because that might compromise the purity of your position, referring to when one b. L. M. Activist refused to meet with him in october, saying it would do a disservice to her greater goals as an activist to participate. Purity of your position. What does that mean . Why would now not meet with the president . Its street credit. Like, were black lives matter, if we meet with you, maybe were compromising our goals. To me this statement is obama in dad mode. Its like, stop all that yelling if youre not going to have a Mission Behind it. I get this point, but it still feels very dadlike. Imagine if youre trying to still get your Movement Together and youre still organizing in this way, and the president is like, okay, cool, come meet me at the oval office. I can imagine him probably huddled in somebodys room, like, oh, my god, get the notes i feel like, you know, its different. I think too many white people often talk about, oh, theyre yelling too loudly or Something Like that, and thats a problem, too, because ultimately, as white people and i think thats my place is to talk to other white people about this thing but ultimately if our problem is with the tone people are taking rather than the racial problems, thats the problem, and you have to look at that. Youre missing the message applause youre missing the message. I think the realization is silently disapproving racism doesnt do anything to change it. And systemic racism. Historically, white people, we suck at realizing it. It took hundreds of years for slavery to end, and there are plenty of issues now. Larry right now, disruption seems to be the thing, but does it seem like it needs to evolve into policy description or that kind of thing . I think prove movements chan. At one time they didnt accept women. At seneca falls, i did no did rh on this here we go. They were going back and forth saying, should we ask for the vote or not . That was the nadeer of the womens movement. In my conversations with white people, its not that obvious to a lot of people, or at least that extent to it. Before i became interested in this stuff which was only like a year ago, i didnt know. Really. Yeah, now i know. Reading the new jim crow by Michele Alexander. I saw you read tanehisi coates, too. Yeah. Ou watch him while hes reading . Yes. laughter Michele Alexander put that whole rear oera on blast but opened er a lot of blacks who were not aware of a lot of the issues she brought up. Im aware of that. So that book is a disruption in and of itself. It seems like the black intellectual class kind of started this movement or they have been the fuel under it. Its called stan wolf. You want to read these things and be a part of these things to stay woke. Is black lives matter going to matter in the fall . I think it will matter always until we have equality. Yeah, it should. Plus, i think b. L. M. Is an idea and, like, thats the most important part. I mean, that i have a slogan thats done as well as, you know, like make America Great again. Is people, you know, just relax. Not saying i like it as much. Thats the problem. We need hats, young people. Hats will be amazing. There are hats. I love hats. We dont have the hats. I love how matt comes and tells us about b. L. M. No, there are hats. There are hats, not my responsibility. Larry thats what happens when you get woke, okay . Well be right back. cheers and applause if you live in the new york city area or are planning to visit, grab free tickets to the nightly show. You know when i first started out, it was all pencil and paper. The surface pro is very intuitive. I can draw lightly, just like i would with a real pencil. Ive been a forensic artist for over 30 years. I do the composite sketches which are the bad guy sketches. You need good resolution, powerful processor because the computer has to start thinking as fast as my brain does. I do this because i want my artwork to help people. Heineken is served its world famous. Like me. Come here. Look it happens all the time. Antonio banderas its Antonio Banderas from the movies. Enjoyed in 192 countries. Theres more behind the star. Hey, can we get some beers . Beer ice cold beer what beer . Ummmm. Redds apple ale ill take one too. Me too hey redds apple ale redds apple ale. Crisp like an apple. Brewed like a beer. cheers and applause larry all right, thanks to my panelists jordan carlos, robin thede and matt mcgorry. Were almost out of time, but before we go, im gonna keep it a hundred. Tonights question is from an audience member named shevam. Lets take a look. Hey, larry. You have to kill two lakers players and save one kobe, shaq and kareem. Which two have to go . Keep it 100. Larry bleep . See you know i love the lakers. Im killing you, shevam. Goodnightly, everyone cheers and applause chris its 11 59 and 59 seconds this happened at the snapchat. Polls today with primaries across the northeast today, one thing were seeing more than ever before this election season is hordes and hordes of pumpedup millennial voters which is why New Hampshire had to ban ballot selfies like these. Officials say ballot selfies could lead to voter fraud and coercion, but how else would you let your exboyfriend connor know youre doing fine without him and just living your life and making America Great again. Snapchat thought the same thing. So they filed an amicus brief last week defending ballot selfies. For the record, snapchat also never liked connor. Hes a [beep]. Snapchats lawyers said the ballot selfie captures the very essence of that political process as it happens, and thus dramatizes the power that one
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