We hope in the normalization process, the people of cuba will change cuba. In the words of raul castro, cuba agreed to nothing. Several senior i. S. I. L. Military leaders have been killed. Iraqi Kurdish Forces launched a major offensive. Therell be challenges down the road that require patients. The United States blame hackers working for north korea. This is something treated as a security matter. See people inhibited by fear and terror. Its tragic. We need to raise strong and independent individuals. Mistakes. Teach children how to deal with disappointment. The accused boston bomber was in court today. Fairly routine hearing, set for an outburst of support. We pray for you. We here for you, we know you innocent we begin with a passionate debate over the historic decision to restore diplomatic ties with cuba after 60 years of hostility. The president had the leaders of burma and china to the United States. For that reason i wouldnt rule out a visit from president castro in havana, many were news. Translation i am happy. I hope this will be the beginning of the end of illogical things that have no reason to exist and are shown to be awesome. The Obama Administrations community. Its an awful day for cuba, i think the deal was dad. The cubans didnt get anything. Anything that brings day. The majority of americans favoured normalizing relies, and a recent Florida International poll found that 68 of cuban americans do as well. Many older cuban americans say that this deal may benefit the cuban government, not the people. Its sad. Seeing the precedent is doing some sort of of negotiation return. Further. The implications of this decision extends beyond cuba, it has a Chilling Effect on democracy and freedom. Joining us from havana, is Chris Gillett, correspondent. The news had a mixed reception there, among dissidents and human rights activists. Thats true. The average cuban has taken the news very positively. They look at the renewal of ties between cuba and the United States as a real opportunity to improve their lot, but the dissidents are quite unhappy with the Obama Administration. Yesterday, we went to a meeting in which they they remarked on their dissatisfaction saying that they felt betrayed by the president Obama Administration. They say that the Obama Administration promised to notify them beforehand if there were to be any sort of opening with cuba, or any other moves to loosen the trade embargo and reestablish political ties, and they feel like the administration has left them dangling in the wind as a result of the president s announcement two days ago. Where is fidel castro. That seems to be a big question of the day. Hes elderly and sick. He makes the occasional public statement. After more than five decades of demonizing the u. S. , do we have this . We dont. I think you could make a fairly safe bet that hes well aware of what happened and probably had input in president raul castros speech last night. He has been ill, he resigned in 2009, and has since not made many public appearances. Truth is, we simply dont know what his condition is at this time, or how much input he had brother. I know cuban blogger has received a bit of International Acclaim is among those who think that this is great for the regime. She tweeted that raul castro must have had the bitter taste of surrender when he made the announcement about opening relations with the United States. What sense do you get from cuban officials . Well, im not sure the bitter taste of defeat would be the terminology i use. The cuban officials recognise that the country needs to change in a fundamental way and in particular, in the economic area. They dont are not anxious for a political change, obviously, but are anxious to move the country forward economically, they seem to recognise that the two go hand in hand, and without economic prosperity, theyll have political problems, so they are very anxious to restore some economic vib ransy. The country is experiencing very difficult times at this at this stage, and very Uncertain Times in terms of the economy. So there is a recognition amongst the officials that some sort of change needs to be made. Chris gillett of the associated press, thank you for your time. Joining us via skype. Ambassador vicky huddle ston, former chief of mission at the United States, havana, 1989, she was director of Cuban Affairs at the state department from 1989 to 1993 and during the Clinton Administration she led a Brookings Institution project and wrote a book. Ambassador, its good to see you. I believe you think this opening to cuba was long overdue. Was it a good deal. In the days that you were dealing with cuba, the u. S. Always approached negotiations requiring reforms from the cuban government on human rights and democracy. We got none of that here. In my opinion this is what should have been done 10 years ago, 20 years ago. What this does, the obama bold moves on diplomatic relations, on removing the communication, the financial parts of the embargo, on taking cuba off the paris list that will probably happen within the next six months, here is a chance for Cuban Civil Society to build a democratic cuba. And a prosperous cuba. We dont need to negotiate it away. We need to get the information and opportunity for cubans to make those changes. The washington post. They had a harsh editorial, calling the president naive saying a 50yearold failed regime got a new lease on life and any progress towards democracy is arrested by the president s shortsited move. Are you concerned this could be a gift to the regime, a bail out ending up not capitalizing performances like cuba. Absolutely not. Let me give you an example. When i was in cuba i passed out amfm handheld. Fidel castro threatened to throw me out of cuba and had a rally of 20,000 people to denounce this activity. Theres nothing more that the cuban government feared more than free communications, interaction. With these majors, there can be sales, gifts of radios, televisions, thumb drives, computers, it will provide the equipment and the interaction that will allow not just cuban, just Cuban Civil Society to connect with people around the world. Its also what happened in Eastern Europe. The electronic sophistication time. Certainly the openness in Eastern Europe helps. I hope you are right in cuba. You heard Chris Gillett talk about the economy, how its struggling and facing difficult times. Cuba likely is on the ropes because plunging oil prices are likely to stop the patron venezuela. They wont be act subsidise the cuban economy. Are you not concerned that this could be a comprehensive bailout. Those are the words of the wall street journal. Not at all. I remember to well in the early 90s. I had a conversation with fidel castro. And at that point the soviet union was breaking up. Cuba was losing its 4 billion annual subsidy, and people in miami, cuban mens were saying christmas in havana. Things could not have gotten worse in havana, other than that is when we pressed the cuban democracy act which cut off a lot of medicines and food to third countries. Here is a moment when cuba was on the rails and they made it through. To believe cuba will fail prolongs getting the support and information into cuba that is going to grow the economy and give cuban young people in particular a real opportunity for a future looking at it from the other side though, is this really not the game changer that as it has been portrayed by supporters. Fully normalizing relations means lifting the embargo altogether. I know you said this is the beginning of the removal of the trade embargo. Theres still a lot of opposition in washington. And it will be a majority Republican Senate and congress. As the cubans like to say. Obama did the hard part. He took the historic, the full move bound to get criticism. Its up to the cuban and American People to deepen and broaden this and allow it to work. Not to be rolled back. Raul castro appeared in military fatigues, he had usual rhetoric saying that cuba agreed to restore full diplomatic relations. Will the castros and the regime change . Well, they say well, their one from is to stay in power. It has always been that. But the embargo helped them to stay in power. Isolation helped them stay in power. What will weaken the cuban government is when the young people have the opportunity to get on the internet and find out what is going on. To interact with each other to get help from outside the country for their meetings on what they want to do, how they want to do blogs, what is happening in the world, things like that. I just think that if theres no information in cuba, then the change does not take place. What we want is a Democratic Change in cuba. The way it was headed was basically raul castro would turn the government over to the military and the party. In other words it would continue as it is. This gives the chance, an opening for change in cuba that could lead to democracy. Abbing ambassador, former head of cuba section. Good to get your perspective joining me from Miami Florida is president of brothers to the rescue, a miami group searching the strait for rafters escaping cuba, they oppose the government. Their plains drop leaflet over cuba and four members were killed in International Waters when the cuban government shot down their planes in 1996. Its a pleasure to have you with us. I know you are happy that alan gross was released. Four members of your group are shot down, you barely escaped. I know you were upset that alan gross was released and three cuban spies were released and they were convicted of an involvement in the shoot down. This is personal for you. It is very much so. Im glad that alan gross has been released. Hes been used as a pawn, a trading chip on this thing. Unfortunately, circumstances and the results of this deal may not be the best for us, the cuban people. I know you oppose the deal. What do you say to the argument that isolating cuba has not worked. That its been a failure for 54 years, going the same thing difference . Im not arguing about the political benefits much king of doing this, which may be goed or bad. Knowing what the cuban government does, theyll take advantage of everything out of the deal and give nothing in exchange. This is not negotiated, its a give away by the president Obama Administration. Cuba will hold on to it, take advantage and stay in power as much as they can. What would you have lined to have seen in order for the deal to be acceptable. First of all, this should within announced before it happened. This is something that has been done unilaterally by paula, ignoring that the government, the United States, has three powers, legislative, judicial and executive. In this case the executive power, on his own, taking to make all these decisions, ignoring the others, thus throwing in the garbage can what the judicial did, which is put in gaol this individual that were assisting the murder of four pilots in 1996. They were send to gaol. Two of them had life sentences for murder, again. This was murder. And they are just being traded as if what they did had no zaps, and the sentence pronounced by the judicial power is being altogether ignored. I believe president obama is number one breaking the law. Number two, doing something people. Couldnt it be good for the cuban people, because you have opposed the castro, the castro regime is in power, they live comfortably while the cuban people suffer shortages and have little freedom. We had the former head of the u. S. Group of havana on the show. She said it could help with the fall of communism. Dont you thing this is the case . This is not the case of history, this is the case of two individuals that held power in cuba, have done so for 50 years, believe they open the country and act as such. I dont think they are going to let go because of this deal, if it can be called a deal, because its a unilateral action undertaking by the government of the United States directed entire by mr president obama. The person that makes all the decisions and this in particular was not consulted to the judiciary or the legislative or for all that matters to the American People. As you know, the u. S. Has issues with the communist Chinese Government and how it treats its people and other governments around the world. That does not stop us having international relations. Different. The u. S. Hold relations with cuba for a long time under the table. Im a witness for that. The pilots killed. And the men that i directed, the group to the rescue the day they were attacked, the government or the u. S. Knew about it and did nothing to prevent it. The government and the u. S. Have been in cahoots many times, and this under the table, and through the executive power. And the people of cuba, the people of the United States, the American People have been ignored in this negotiations. Although on the other hand polls show most americans do want diplomatic relations, we are seeing a generational shift among cuban americans, where the younger cuban americans some as young as 90 , want the embargo to end and want the diplomatic relations with cuba. What do you see the future being now that this has happened . I question your numbers because i dont thing where you are getting the 90 from. International. The cuban people, i believe is divided on that. Certainly divided. Theres a Florida University poll finding that the majority of all cuban americans want the establishment of relations with havana. Things have changed. I appreciate your perspective. I know that potentially this must be a difficult moment. Good to have you with us. Now for more stories from around the world. We begin in moscow where Vladimir Putin struck a defiant tone saying he would not back down on ukraine. The russian president urged both sides in ukraine to keep the country as a single entity and negotiate a peace deal. He blamed we were nations for creating the conflict, comparing the west to a bloodthirsty opponent wanting to tear out the clause and teeth of the russian bear. Next we head to northeastern nigeria, where suspected militants stormed a village, killing more than 30 people, kidnapping 200. Witnesses say gunmen set the village on fire. News got out because it took days for survivors to reach a town and tell their story. A nigeria courtmartial sentenced 54 soldiers to death for refusing to fight boko haram. The soldiers complained not something enough ammunition or food. Boko haram is accused of killing 2,000 people alone. Bombing suspect appeared in court since an arraignment since july last year, the the Boston Marathon bomber. Near the end of the arraignment. A woman stood up and shouted support, the motherinlaw of a man shot to death by the fbi. He pleaded not guilty to 30 federal charges and could face the death penalty. That is some of what is happening around the world. Coming up, news of a big win against i. S. I. L. Tempered by word from the u. S. Military that it could take years to turn the tide against the group the sony hacking was north korea behind the attack that led the country to pull a major movie from theatres. What do you think. Join the theres more to finical news than the ups and downs of the dow. For instance, can fracking change what you pay for water each month . Have you thought about how Climate Change can effect your grocery bill . Could Rare Minerals in china effect your cell phone bill . Or, how a hospital in texas could drive up your health care premium. Ill make the connections from the news to your money real. Now available, the new al jazeea america mobile news app. Get our exclusive in depth, reporting when you want it. A global perspective wherever you are. The major headlines in context. Mashable says. Youll never miss the latest news they will continue looking for survivors. The potential for Energy Production is huge. No noise, no clutter, just real reporting. The new Al Jazeera America mobile app, available for your apple and android mobile device. Download it now kurdistan peshawar fighters on thursday say they won a key battlefield victory over i. S. I. L. And northern iraq, while the u. S. General warned years of patience would be needed to reach a turning point in the fight against the group, which he referred to using the arab acronym dash. We have patience in the relationship to call it dash. They have proved to be resilient. You are tacking three years. The siege on mt sinjar, since august, when i. S. I. L. Attacked killing thousands forcing girls and women into slavery. They continued to battle. We are joined by rear admiral john kirby. Good to see you. We heard general terry urging patients patience saying it could be a minimum of three years. Saying the targeted strikes kill. Is the bombing being more successful than we thought or heard. We know over time. More you do, the more youll decrayed and damage the organizations ability to operate, communicate and lead itself. We know we are having an effect. So what you saw are two practical, tactical representations of that effect. Well i think the other one you are talking about is the kurds saying that they opened a corridor in the area of mt sinjar, allowing them to reach the refugees besieged by i. S. I. L. The kurds say its the single biggest military offensive. The most successful so far. How important is this victory. Im not sure im in a position to quantify it. Its a big undertaking. We help them with air strikes. There was 50 air strikes conducted by the coalition in preparation of their movement to establish the line of the communication with mt sinjar. It was supported by the air, and 50 air strikes over the course of 24 hours is nothing to sneeze at. That is a lot of firepower put down on the area. It is a big operation. Whether its the biggest one. Im not in a position to say. It is significant. Great international cooperation. And with intrinsic indigenous troops on the ground, in this north. They also took a mt tal afar. Giving them a point to attack. Yes, they have seized key terrain, which is important. The Kurdish Forces have been fighting, and they have been retaken more than a dozen other villages and towns they are good fighters. The Iraqi Government will have reapply and support. Us and the coalition are supporting them from the air. They are holding key terrain, which is degrading i. S. I. L. s ability to operate in iraq. We are talking iraq and success with the bombing. Lets talk syria, 97 of strikes in syria are done by the u. S. Its a huge imbalance. Also, the strikes in syria diminished, is our effort in syria slowing down . No, i wouldnt say its slowing down. In the intro we are conducting air strikes. Theyll continue. Theres strikes in syria going on elsewhere, trying to get at the groups ability to sustain it is there. It is a fact that statics targets will diminish. Thats what you want. You want to eliminate targets so the enmay cannot use them. Why the unbalance between our partners . Well, we said from the beginning that we want our Coalition Partners to bring to the fight what they want to do, what they are able to do, what the citizens and populations wants them to contribute. We are not coming to Different Countries with laundry lists or urgent requests. We have equalition, not as many as those flying air strikes with us in iraq. Thats not the point. They are contributing what they can. Pakistan is important. And you saw the horror at the school. Do you think that this will lead to an improvement relation with pakistan. Because that relationship has been fraught with problems over the years. We dont talk about the relationship much these days. Its overshadowed with other event like iraq. I can tell you before this terrible attack, this week on that school, and those young children. The United States military and the Pakistani Military conditioned to work at the relationship. Its been improving over the last severely years, and this is not unimportant. The relationship between the Pakistani Military and Afghan Military forces across the border. Ashraf ghani made it a point to reach out to the pakistani leaders, and he did so in the wake of terrible murders. Hes done that. General campbell in afghanistan reached out to his counterpart in pakistan. There has been a lot of discussion this week, over this event. But it culminates and caps off a growing improving relationship that we had with the Pakistani Military. We talk about north korea in the next segment. What does the successful hack of Sony Pictures say about our vulnerability with cyber warfare and do we know it was intoa. Im not in a position to confirm the source of the Cyber Attacks on Sony Pictures. I wouldnt do that. What i can tell you broadly without getting into the specifics of this case, because its not something the pentagon is speaking to is cyber and the cyber domain is a serious concern in the defense department. We have a combat and command set up to deal with operations in that domain. We know na there are real Cyber Threats to this country posed by state and nonstate actors over the world. To. Rear admiral john kirby, pleasure to have you with us. Thank you ahead the sony hacking scandal. The company that cancelled the release of a big movie a crisis on the border. Theryre vulnarable. These are refugees. Migrent kids flooding into the u. S. Were gonna go and see josue whos just been deported. Why are so many children fleeing . Your children will be a part of my group or killed. Fault lines, Al Jazeera Americas hard hitting. Today they will be arrested. Ground breaking. Theyre firing canisters of gas at us. Emmy Award Winning investigative series. Fault lines no refuge children at the border only on Al Jazeera AmericaTelevision Icon norman lear we hoped we were delivering real characters. Creator of all in the family the jeffersons and good times talks race, comedy and American Culture today. Youre taking me to a place in this interview, i havent been before. I told you this would be your best interview. And it is. Its the current one. Every monday, join us for exclusive. Revealing. And surprising talks with the most interesting people of our time. Talk to al jazeera, only on Al Jazeera America a hacking attack has brought Sony Pictures to its knees. The studio cancelled the christmas release of its 44 million comedy, the interview, after hackers, calling themselves guardians of peace stole unreleased films and private documents from studio computers and threatened movie goers with 9 11style attacks at movie theatres. An unconfirmed report says north korea was involved in the hack, spurned by anger at the plot of secretly proposing to assassinate the leader. The c. I. A. Would love it in you could take him out. What, for drinks. On the up to. No, take him out. You want us to kill the leader of north korea . Yes. What for more, im joined from minneapolis, chief operator of a cyber firm and a member previously of the Electronic Crimes Task force. An investigator told the International Press that hackers have been conducting surveillance since last spring. How do hackers break into what you think would be a wellprotected Corporate Network like sonys . Traditionally these attacks begin with a wellplaced, well targeted email directing the recipient to click here. Often, you know, hackers need someones help in order to carry out this type of a breach, and the help that they need is for the recipient to click on the link. That can download malware or job script that the attackers can use to move throughout the organizations network. How hard is it to protect against that. Most of us have antiviral software. Cant networks protect themselves against this kind of thing . The problem is Antivirus Software only protects against known threats. And these are custom written scripts, so they have never been seen before. So most antivirus packages miss them, and thats why the attackers, being as skilful as they are, are very successful. We had the Pentagon Press secretary on the show and he couldnt confirm that the hackers were north korean, the white house said the same thing. We are used to thinking of the n. S. A. As being allpowerful. Is it that hard to tries the this. They can be for a number of reasons. The true attackers can disguise themselves as someone else. Even if circumstantial evidence points to north korea, it may or may not ultimately be found to be accurate. It is very important to withhold judgment until the investigation and the forensic analysis has been completed. It has not been completed, ill put you on the spot. Do you think the North Koreans were behind it . I dont know. I dont like to speculate. Lets talk about the north korean regime. There are reports that they could have more than 3,000 professional hackers waging cyber war and there have been a number of cases before where north korea is believed to have been involved in transportation hacking, especially of south korean firms. Yes, certainly. Just last year there was a large number of attacks traced to north korea against corporations in south korea. Using software, malware that is it similar to the type used in the sony attack. Again, its very circumstantial at this point. Beliefs. What about iran. Reports that they could have helped the North Koreans. Well, i dont know. Again, that belief is based on the fact that similar tools have been used in attacks and those attacks were subsequently traced back to iran. Again, just because the same tool or the same type of tool is used in a breach, im hesitant to point a finger until that complete forensic analysis has been completed. I would like to play a quote from our republican senator john mccain and get your reaction. It should be a wake up call. That a country like north korea has this capability, imagine the capability they have to disrupt other expects of american life. How big a threat are we facing, from cyber warfare . We face a big threat. Everything that we d o is connected to com we do is connected to computers, power grids, hospitals, food supplies, water supplies. Cyber security is a big deal. It needs to be taken seriously. Unfortunately, some times it takes an incident like this to gain the attention that is should have had all along. Mark from computer forensic services, pleasure to have you with us, good to have your insight ahead the changing place of college administrations, while elite schools are bombarding applicants with all kinds of perks. Is complimenting your child a Al Jazeera America presents somebodys telling lies. It looks nothing like him. Pan am flight 103 explodes december 21st, 1988 was the right man convicted . So many people, at such a high level, had the stake in almegrahis guilt the most definitive look at this shocking crime the major difficulty for the prosecution that there was no evidence Al Jazeera America presents lockerbie part one the pan am bomber its that time of i dont remember when hopeful High School Seniors are hearing back from Early College applications. Many students are plying to more than 10 or 20 schools. One student reportedly applied to 56. Another planning on 86. And the colleges are making it worse by advertising to students and parents, and dropping sa and testing requirements to attract more applicants. Some are starting to worry that this will be causing americas young mind more harm than good. Joining us from washington d. C. Is thomas franks. He has written about education and is an author. For the longest time if a school was worth going to, they shouldnt advertise. I have a High School Senior going to college. These are emails that ive been flooded with, hundreds every week. 5. 5 hours from the best colleges in the country to some you have not heard of. One Prestigious School offered to flyher to the campus. Why are the colleges trying hard to recruit applicants. The first thing you have to keep in mind was if a school has to advertise it wasnt so good. It wasnt long ago we said the same thing about lawyers. What you see is something above the luge demands. If you examine the way universities behave. Private schools, pretty much across the board they behave like predatory institutions, and truth be told. I have never hard of a college flying a student down. I will forward you the email. Its a good college. What you are talking about theres a competitive vicious circle leading to higher tuition, colleges doing anything they can to attract plants from fancy buildings to jack useies. Some look like resorts. Is part of the problem theres too much money available for loans. You wrote a strong statement, saying that its a rip off on victims. I dont think loans are what is at fault. We had Student Loans before this got out of control. We had the g. I. Bill in the 1940s. We know when the tuition spiral took off. It was in 1981. Student loans had been around for a long time. I dont think its the cause. I want to go back to what you say about universities spending money on frivolous things, which is true. Theres tales of outrages in the newspaper all the time. There was one in the New York Times about colleges building a lazy river. Do you know what this is . Its like a slowmoving swimming bool. And now everyone has to have one, right. You sit on the inner tube and ride on this thing. Theres one aspect of the College Experience they are not spending money on, they are going in the other direction, and it is the the most important aspect of the College Experience, which is professors. The education. These are people who have been essentially deprofessionalized in a party of 20 years. Is this about the colleges acting as competitive corporations, trying to be as high as they can on the best colleges list every year. If they get more applicants im not sure if they get more money, but it looks better, the acceptance rate goes down, and seems like they are going after applicant that they know they will never accept. Its probably right. I find in these situations the most mercenary and cynical explanation is frequently the one that turns out to be right. All i read was what i read in the newspaper. If they can get the numbers of applicants up and deny a bump, it bumps their score and ranking of best colleges, which has an astounding over what High Schoolers value and where parent want to send their children. What does that do to the high School Students. You write that Higher Education is the industry that sells tickets to the av lupt life. Is this about fear . Is this increasing stress to kids, that they have to apply to a lot of colleges in the hope of getting that important ticked to the affluent life . Absolutely. This is the only ticket to the middle class or the upper middle class that our society acknowledges. Once upon a time you work your way up, took a job out of high school. The only credential that matters is the you know, is the college diploma. We are not going to go into this now, but it has little to do with what you learn in college, more to do with the idea of the college as a brand signifier, the sticker you put on the rear window of your s. U. V. That is what matters. High School Students know this. They know they have to get into a college and better college, the better off theyll be, somewhere off the road. Essentially they have no power in this negotiation. Right. And the way this manifests itself, the awful way in which this turns out is you graduate the glasses of students who out of college who are then, what, 30,000 in debt. 40,000 in debt. This is people just starting out their lives as adults with essentially the same debt that house. And people with a lot more than that. Changing. Thanks. Any time. Coming up, is telling your child they are special a bad thing. Are we overpraising our children telling them they are special and smart. Researchers find the prays that many parents heap upon their children could turn them into underachievers. Everyone agrees some praise and support is important. But when does caring turn into cobb limbing. Joining us is the cohost of the mums, denise, and a meant Health Expert and a psych ols, appearing on news and Television Shows and has written books on relationships and parenting. Good to see you. This is getting a lot of traction, a lot of concern over parents overvaluing their kids and overcodling them. How big of a problem is it . Depend on how you look at it. Each parent needs to look at the chin, and each child needs something different. Certain children i have two boys and the ordinarily one needs a little more cod lipping, it helps him. My younger doesnt need it as much. Its on a problem if the kids dont react well. You agree its an individualized thing. Yes. Theres a body of research saying overpraising children is not a good thing. I hate the research, its proving true. We have to look at the children and make sure we give them what they need. Too often the parents are looking at the intrinsic traits of their children, instead of reinforcing the work they do, the process work, what they are doing is looking at more of those intripsic values, and after a while the kid says you can only tell me im smart so many times, versus the work that i do. You can improve in that area, but not in the intrinsic values. The way they put it is process prays is good, saying that was a great effort, you worked hard, telling them you are super intelligent. Thats not a good idea. Right. I agree with that. I remember as a child my parents saying to me, you know, it really is about the work that you do and the fact that you try and not everywhere is as smart in certain things, but it doesnt mean that you are not good at things. My parents used to say you dont have to go to harvard. Thats the mentality i use which my children. Columbia is good enough. A lot of what we see is the naas sis tick parents. Kids. Its an extension of themselves. They look at all of things that their kids are doing that may not deserve prays, because they as the parent, the individual feel special, different, superior, therefore my child must be superior, because that child came from me. There are consequences. What they find is people that are themselves. That wasnt my case from my parents. So i can speak to that. I hope i am not doing that with my children. I try to find the rite balance. It happened that someone said can your son by in the kids band, is he good. I said i dont know if hes that good, but he can learn. I try to be a judge of what my kids are good at and what they are not good at. Thats fine. Going back to the praise and the consequences. The studies show if you praise your kid the wrong way, you could have consequences where kids overpraised end up trying to take the easy way out. What is going on is that there is a release of what we call a neurotransmitter called donter mine which makes people adiibility. That was great. Ata boy, the dopamine was release ed. The problem in life, whether its process working intrinsic stuff, at the end of the day you may not be getting reinforcement for anything you do even if its the greatest stuff that you do. You stop doing it because you are so addicted to the pray. You just give up. Im waiting for my prays, how am i doing. To your point, something that is striking, young adults beyond kids. They have become so used to getting prays, that they care more about a boost to self jeff food. That and other things. Which is shocking. That was a surprise to me. When you look at drug addiction, after a while its not the homework or the great work, its the drug itself. When praise is the drug, stuff like food and doing well at school no longer works. All you want is the praise whether you have done the word, you want to hear how great you are. This is where it does get denise. The best parent. And the final word what is your quick advice to mums . Its about knowing your child. Knowing when it is appropriate to praise and much. Always a pleasure. Thats all for now. The conversation tips on the website and we are on facebook and twitter and tweet me amoratv. See you the truth in stranger than fiction, hackers plot to kill Hollywood Comedy about the plot to kill north koreas leader. Instead of laughs were left with questions about security. And america moves to end decades of isolation from cuba. Between the lines in the Government Spending bill a provision to give sacred native American Land away to a Copper Mining company. Money