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Filled our days with the spastic motion of the boy vince if we stop to truly think about it we may figure out our scant few years of consciousness are pissed away as slaves that often meaningless jobs they are the corporate owners are sucking away our lives thats what your job is its a piece of your existence and now with life on holiday we see almost none of it was essential instead the things we worry. Whats actually essential forming a world that will last more than 20 years learning and creating enjoying clean water clean air clean food spending time with your beautiful family dog god all right not that one go back to the waterfall jesus christ. Point is the stuff that batters is this stuff we were completely ignoring as our world was eaten by corporate profit but now now the Natural World is already reclaiming the spaces beaches around the globe are no longer flooded by fleshy apes and have been retaken by thousands millions of birds massive highways normally filled with Noise Pollution and coughs now sit empty quiet in cleveland in los angeles the air quality which is usually some of the worst in the nation has turned into one of the cleanest compared to other major cities even more impressive is the fact that the city has enjoyed its longest stretch of good air quality since 995 since 99 the by do you understand how long ago 1995 was in 9095 there was a movie starring chuck norris and a dog im not kidding and im pretty sure the dog want to go and go for that plus nitrogen dioxide has plummeted heres a map of the 2 different times has plummeted over china and italy during this pandemic bears and bobcats have been seen wandering around Yellowstone Park when they used to live in the shadows coyotes are out and about in california again eating peoples pasts its utopia a zoo in hong kong has been trying to get to pander as a mate for 10 years and now that the zoo is shut down they finally have what more proof you need the pandas are not patterns are. Put in all seriousness and im sorry if you dont want to hear this and really start in order to stop Climate Change and create a Sustainable World it requires. The end of capitalism i know its upsetting i know and i know that theyre just saying that just saying that is not allowed on any Corporate Media dog and pony show bull infotainment hour if i said that on c. N. N. Or fox news a tranquilizer dart would hit me right in the knack right now and theyd cut to a commercial while my lifeless body was dragged off of set and fed to the starving ladies of fox news and only feed a once a week but lets be intellectually honest just for a moment as guardian columnist george bottom on the oath said capitalism has 3 and the characteristics that drive us towards destruction firstly that it generates and relies upon perpetual growth and less growth on a planet with finite resources that is physically impossible and find my palm pale touching his toes ok its a possible the 2nd problem is the idea that our right to own natural wealth equates to the amount of money that weve got in the bank or we can borrow so you can take as much natural wealth away from other people as you like and it means that no matter what environmentalists do to drive a video game Climate Change the richest corporations in the world can just a new it by buying and polluting ever more the 3rd characteristic is the one that really ensures that people go along with capitalism the idea that everyone can pursue and can expect to find private luxury but of course thats impossible if everyone live the way the top one percent live on the planet would collapse quickly and in fact its glad to get away right now because of how a percentage of humanity lives we look at a very good point of pink things. Sure i admit i like to keep my private jet air conditioned to a nice 58 degrees in the hottest days of the summer and stocked full of rare endangered fish for lays not for me but for my 5 dogs who are bathed in only the freshest spring water shipped in from alaska but every cycle the fish fillet packages. Are going to do in my part the cold truth is 90 percent of humanity will never live anywhere near the way the richest people do in fast the World Bank Says that nearly half of the world lives on less than 5. 50 a day even as our planet crumbles under the weight of consumption and greed most people most people are in poverty and thats how the system of capitalism is designed its just done it and its not a mistake its not a good c its not a boo boo its by design it was meant to be that way as mon bio also said if we were to admit the truth if we take away the false promise of capitalism and just say to people look private luxuries only for a few people you will never have it and you wont even have a chance of getting it if we admit that then the entire justification for capitalism is no war. Im not saying i have all the answers but the pandemic shutdown has shown us the problem it is showing us what the world looks like without much pollution without the chaos and roar of mostly meaningless work and i dont mean that everything that has stopped is meaningless but most jobs clearly arent essential if you could stop doing something for a month or 2 and it doesnt kill anyone. You know no one dies from the fact that your job is stopped. That is not essential of course this t. V. Show here is essential because without me yelling you are at the corrupt leaders and many people would be angry who could take you there kill themselves so im saving a lot of lives come to you from washington say the belle of the bases redacted i. Welcome my only cam dollars take the news from as you know Bernie Sanders has one of the democratic primaries to be there to drop out before handing the nomination to a senile old man who fought for segregation. 2 and biden fought for segregation back when his brain was still working how terrifying is that if this supporters could say oh yeah well back there you know is brain was tapioca putting back that back when he supported segregation then you might have something but no that was back when his brain was at its best but where was i yes Bernie Sanders led a Political Revolution john. Taylor was and it back over to the neo liberal destruction of the planet he told his supporters they were going up against the democratic establishment against the republican establishment against the military establishment and the corporate establishment we are legion we never got out as i write. Till we surrender and they win yeah they won their won the democratic Establishment Republicans military blah blah blah bernie wants you to know they won and he endorses joe biden. The one thing Bernie Sanders seems to have met was that true Political Revolutions dont generally endorse everything they fought against by. In all honesty Bernie Sanders has done a lot of good by forcing certain ideas into the mainstream however he was never a revolutionary so if there is going to be a true Political Revolution in america as our empire collapses it must be far larger than just Bernie Sanders or just one person of any stripes it must be all of us and many and maybe sanders greatest addition to our National Discourse was showing that the Democratic Party will never let progress carry the day now just as in 2016 this time around the millionaires who run the Democratic Party did everything they could to stop Bernie Sanders campaign they rigged it with media manipulation they rigged it with collusion among the corporate establishment kissing joe bidens but on the same day he was so intense they had to rub chapstick on biden chics. They rigged it by closing polling places in sanders strongest areas they rigged it but instructing alexion volunteers to give out provisional ballots they rigged it with a shadow app in iowa they rigged it but you would have black box Voting Machines that can never be held accountable they rigged it by suppressing social media to stop a Viral Movement of progress and human rights they rigged it with millions of dollars of dark money and they rigged it by giving Bernie Sanders heart attack using a positive value on it is tell a rag on developed by darpa and placed on mars you know jane 74 i made up that got the rest are true you cant put a brake on on mars because the earth is flat and mars is a plate of pasta sauce everyone knows that theyve reduced. In a 1000000 different ways and now were expected to jump in bed with joe biden thats no choice at all we have a choice between a serial liar serial Sexual Assault or serial narcissist serial pusher of racist policies all the rich white man with mental problems funded by big banks and the worst still im puddles of Corporate America or donald trump theyre practically the same ass. Its like an election between kim carr action and chloe card asking i dont even know which is which this is not a choice would you rather have bits from back to the future to or mr burns from the simpsons thats your option so go ahead good luck to those moving on i want to jump to how the New York Times has just realized something that everyone else knew for the past 20 years which thats thats their m. O. Because you say theres a reason i go after the New York Times because theyre supposed to be the accurate media theyre supposed to be the good one i dont spend much time Fact Checking fox news or something because that would be like Fact Checking your 2 year old after she got into the benadryl bottle and shes plastered calling out that fox news or m s n b c got something wrong feels like yelling and they say theyre drunk cause or you are incorrect in your assessment of course that doesnt mean i dont do it sometimes but dont but yes the New York Times has suddenly realized that the rich have secretly been exploiting 99 percent of us for ears. They put together a series of charts that said g. D. P. Has risen 79 percent since the 1980 over that same 40 years the after tax income of the bottom bottom half of earners has risen only 20 percent but for the very wealthy the story is completely different their incomes have risen much faster than g. D. P. Up 420 percent since the 1980 s. And adorable the New York Times just found out. Capitalism. Grow up so quick dont search to feel the quality hadnt soared over the past 40 to 50 years with the same g. D. P. That we have today but with 1980 levels of inequality every American Household in the bottom 90 percent of income would be earning about 12000. 00 more not just this year but permanently in effect each household in the bottom 90 percent is sending a check for 12000. 00 to every household in the top one percent year after year after year since 2011 and family in the bottom 90 percent has given the rich a 110468. 00 now nice of you to inform us New York Times this is certainly something that could have been brought to our attention years ago perhaps during the occupy wall Street Movement when it would have added massive amounts of fuel to the fires that were burning next week the New York Times is going to inform us that Osama Bin Laden is determined to attack within the u. S. Cant wait. Where to go to a quick break but check out my free standup comedy special at least camp american dot com my standup comedy special is free for the 1st time also grab the new or to america app portable t. V. Which is also free at portable dot tv slash download all over i bet a lot more. Coby 19 pandemic not only sees much of the world in lockdown but it is also devastated economies and damage has been painful recovery from it maybe even more painful is it all falls. Silent bananas used to put on a chain around the stone to cut you a little sponge thats them. But you. Dont own that i desired to know. How much old of the. Local just didnt. Show. You produce not just the most unusual not a model so we started to. Go to. The world. Shaped. Thinks. We dare to ask. Welcome back im still lay camp while the pandemic has exposed the failings of our government and corporate institutions it is also revealed how dependent state Unemployment Offices are on Outdated Technology we go now to correspond to naomi caravan whos in the field reporting on this story their mail we where are you today only 159 i think you know what we i had a middle seat on a 24 hour time machine ride it was super crowded because everyone was on their way to hitlers birthday even though i got off early it was terrible ok well when we talk about social distancing i think we need space not time you need to well i wasnt going to go to new jersey thats not safe ever Unemployment Benefits may be delayed due to outdated Computer Systems but theres good news c. N. N. Reports new job openings at your local Unemployment Office he wanted urgently people who know a half century old computer language so states can process unemployment claims all you need is 50 plus Years Experience with the computer languages how old is a little employee to ask the age of a Computer Program its name is cobol common business oriented language and it was created in 1959 by grace hopper who i just spoke to she cant believe that were still using the code either. And its really widespread 61 years later cobol runs the Social Security administration the v. A. The Treasury Department and many banks use it to process credit Card Transactions in 2020 because i just dont teach it anymore so theres a total lack of experts only one programmer maintained colorados cobol unemployment system before the corona Virus Outbreak and they get by with one dude now now states are calling for cobol volunteers to help with the massive demand on unemployment agencies like with governor of new jersey in our list of volunteers judy no only do we need Health Care Workers but given the legacy systems we should add a page for cobalt. Computer skills because thats what were dealing with but literally we have. Systems that are 40 plus years old and theyll be and theyll be lots of postmortems and one of them on our list will be how the heck did we get here we literally needed cobol programmers did he say cobalt like the color. So we dont only desperately need a virus test and ventilators but we also have a shortage of experts in ancient computer language which where is he going to find these people well retirees can get off their boats and volunteer and yes i think he did say cobalt on the bread side theyre offering 4 shiny nickels an hour for the work plus the state of the art frigidaire. Ok so what does this mean for the stimulus package that is supposed to put more money in the hands of the unemployed now that well the stimulus is a weekly increase of 600. 00 on unemployment checks when i get there for a while because states are responsible for distributing the checks and at least 12 states are running their unemployment cobol and antique machinery the floppy disks kid dusty really Many Americans wont receive the relief until months later but im suffering to the why fight is crappier so the relief wont relieve much congress has been making cuts to modernization which costs a lot so its a crisis on a crisis we havent been investing in the systems serving people in poverty because we thought if it aint broke dont fix it and now everyones broke so its very confusing now i need to go make dinner for my husband or beat me legally so if youll excuse me. One minute break thanks there me they only give them. Next up new segment where i get to chat about the news that i didnt get to cover before and with me is my socially distant correspondent Natalie Mcgill thanks for joining me from way over there natalie what do you got well leigh ive got a warning for our viewers for those of you watching this while quarantining with others you may constantly feel like someone is watching you whether its your child or your cat or the boyfriend or girlfriend you were planning to pick up with before the korean teen and if youre watching this from Baltimore City then you definitely feel like youre being watched after your elected officials just approved a Drone Surveillance Program for cops the spy on you on april fools day baltimore officials approve the deal between the Baltimore Police department and ohio based company Persistent Surveillance Systems to use drones equipped with High Resolution cameras in order to spy on the citys residents through around the clock surveillance spied for home objections filed by the a. C. L. U. And the legal defense. First of all great name persistent surveillance real subtle subtle about it also if youre from baltimore is this standard april fools day joke or generally an april fools a joke and baltimore is a few switch out somebody is all big canister with like sugar or salt instead of actual. Also the name is perfect i mean i think the only thing that would have been better would have been like stalkers r us and then it would just be like the backwards are from toys r us maybe they can remember blackwater or yeah exactly but the funny thing is actually that name is actually really appropriate Persistent Surveillance Systems because 4 years ago that same company was under heat for flying a spy plane over baltimore to surveil a citizens without them knowing even the city council didnt even know about this but in this case the city council does know and like the public didnt even get any say. In the guinea pigs for all the. Crazy we want to do in this country paralyzed was just doing to baltimore because they cant fight back there you know to a lot of poor people every also looks kind of really up about it its like Everybody Knows how jacked up this Police Department is this is the Police Department thats known for planting or have making sure that their officers have like a toy gun on them oh right case they get you know yeah in case they get like there or making sure that they plant drugs on like suspects so like they already dont have a great relationship with any of their citizens there thats a. Fools joke as killing someone planting a toy to go and gun on them youve got another story yeah so our privacy isnt the only thing at risk of falling to covert 19 in the United States Postal Service is on the verge of collapse and 630000 people could lose their jobs because trump refuses to bail them out the Postal Service needs 75000000000. 00 to stay alive but whats being talked about in this is thats because they were forced to pay their pensions like 75. 00 yeah this is an advance yes so theyre really theyre like the only industry thats forced to do that basically because the larger republicans wanted to bankrupt them yet Everybody Knows that the United States Postal Service is not a business it was never intended to be a business its a service that i never supposed to be let out acts of the i just its going to say these Public Libraries are not making a big enough profit have you know to say they are not raking in the dough like they should be its ridiculous i mean at this point were going to have to have like a national slingshot or something like. I mean nothing with class and obviously you know its really its a ridiculous and its an absurd standard that no other Government Agency has to handle and i dont think a lot of people realize how screwed we will be without a Postal Service like if youre somebody who has your business is to create tiny jackets for hamsters on etsy. True. Wow all right natalie thanks so much thank you. And here are your headlines from the future on monday e. S. P. N. Will report. 30 percent of pro sports mascots have killed themselves due to lack of audience philly fanatic latest to crush head with comically large mallet that was a sad story and one week youll learn. With the world on lockdown endangered of why all the water possums have a gun living in Donald Trumps hair again thats adorable and in 3 weeks the Washington Post will report something something coronavirus something something what month is it. Thats our show but if you look at present the free to do ad all right now check out my standup comedy special elite camp american dot com and my new book is at least camp book dot com plus ive been putting up web exclusive videos all the time of you tube god calm so i was redacted tonight until next time goodnight and good bye the. Pain has changed american lives but pharmaceutical companies have a miraculous solution. Based drugs the people who are chronic pain patients believe that their prescription is working for them on the remedy be sent to the price that they pay closer dependency and addiction to opiates to long term use that really isnt scientifically just now study actually suggest that. The long term effects might not just be the absence of benefit but actually that they might be causing long term. The world is driven by a dream shaped by one person. Thinks. We fear to ask. Hello there im in illinois and youre watching in question broadcasting live from r. T. American National Headquarters in washington d. C. I want to welcome our viewers from across the nation and all around the world here are tonights top stories 1st in new york a state with a 19000000 people will begin aggressively testing for antibodies Antibody Testing to figure out how many people were infected with coded 19 a full report on that is coming up next plus the 1st sailor from the virus stricken u. S. S. Theodore roosevelt has died from cope with 1001 where hundreds of sailors are still being tested and quarantined in hotels worrying the local club someone on the ground explained then new details emerge in

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