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Major events are being canceled, postponed. The tax deadline may even be postponed. Theyre thinking about pushing tax day past april 15th. Jeff bezos heard that and said, wow, whats tax day . The ncaa announced that march madness will go on but with no fans. There will be no spectators, outside of the players families. They should also consider playing without a ball. Thats just a petri the warriors will be playing without a crowd. But basketball games in the pros have been played without fans before. The clippers did it for many years. [ applause ] and in part, in part because of all these cancellations, a lot of people dont seem to know what to think about the coronavirus, what to feel. Should i be scared . Are people overreacting . Whats true, whats not true . Its totally normal to feel that way. Many have the same thoughts. So i thought this might help. These are the five stages of coronavirus, so first you have denial. Im not going to get the coronavirus. Only old people, Chinese People and people on cruise ships get that. Second, anger. Why isnt there any toilet paper at target . Is everybody nuts . Then bargaining. Theres no purel, maybe ill make my own sanitizer with jergens and vodka. Next comes depression. I cant believe they canceled coachella, im not going to get to see Carly Ray Jepsen for a year now. And hey, if i know what, if i die, maybe ill get to meet prince. Youre not alone, okay . The fear is spreading not just here in the united states. People are losing their minds all over the world. The nation of italy has closed all shops except for groceries and pharmacies, which seems to be what they do every time i go on vacation anyway. Everythings closed. And in the land downunder, look at this video. This is Security Camera showing the toilet paper aisle at a Grocery Store in australia. Which i really, i dont understand the hoarding toilet paper. But imagine getting trampled to death buying charmin. The president has been spreading mixed messages. Federal officials would like President Trump to stop shaking hands in public. President trump says he doesnt care, hes going to continue to move on those happenends like a bitch. The man eats pancakes for breakfast and lives in a tanning bed, do you think hes going to start listening to doctors . Even because of his tiny, tiny hands, even a travel size bottle of purel is like a lifetime supply. And by the way, he is at risk. He meets the definition of being at risk. He shook hands with doug collins who is now in quarantine. They even gave a little kiss. And while trump has refused to stop shaking hands for now at least, his staff appears to have found a creative solution to keep his nubby little digits in check. A lot of them are things you want to get for other things, and were looking at the people, were looking at solving this problem. Also some very good numbers coming out of some countries where it started earlier, and were see beiing fairly good nus coming out of those countries, thats a good thing. Jimmy hes bringing cookies out of the oven. Even the commander of the Coronavirus Task force Space Force Vice president mike pence is on the same page handshake wise with President Trump. As the president has said, in our line of work, you shake hands when someone wants to shake your hand. I expect the president will continue to do that. Ill continue to do it. Jimmy thats interesting, because while he claims hell continue to do that, you can see, mike pence hasnt been shaking hands. Whenever hes not with the president , hes out there bumping elbows with everybody he runs into. Hes bumping elbows with his el bros all the time. Makes you wonder what else hes doing that the president doesnt know about. The move pence was doing is something ive branded the el bump. Its a hand shake alternative, and its kicking off with people at first take. Jimmy kimmels looking out for us. Its called the el bump. We can just do, whats going on, everybody, welcome on in to first take. What is it . It is corny, and i love me some jimmy kimmel. But that is corny, and more importantly, the elbow puts you closer to the person where the fist bump makes you keep your distance. Think, jimmy, distance, distance. Sorry, jimmy, i tried. Can we just bow like the japanese . Jimmy yes, you could bow like the japanese or do the elbow, like i want people to do. And steven, i will pray for you, that you do not get this coronavirus, just keep distance. Can you do it like this. Jaylin rose and david jacoby. Elbow. Jimmy thats how you do it and thats why these two will live forever. [ applause ] these are troubled times. Things are very el bumpy between President Trump and nancy pelosi. Trump refuses to meet with pelosi about the coronavirus or anything, which is, i think its just going to make the eventual makeup sex hotter, but meanwhile, former democratic candidate and spiritual leader or something, i dont know what she is. Maryann williamson is back doing her part to fight the coronavirus. Its important to remember this person was running for president. Now, what i want to do now is a meditation with you. Because whats happening is that the panic that were all being thrown into, the fear that were being thrown into actually decreases the functioning of our immune system. Watch and feel as this light now enters no yo enters into your brain, your stomach, your cervix, your penis, your vagina, your buttocks. Go wash your hands. Jimmy right, yes. She has a penis and a vagina . My cervix feels better already. Thank you, maryann. The government is cracking down right now on those selling bogus remedies for the virus. Those include disgraced tv sellev sellevangelist baker. Youre saying that silver solution would be effective. Lets say it hasnt been tested on this strain of the coronavirus, but its been tested on other strains of the coronavirus and has been able to eliminate it within 12 hours. Yeah. Totally eliminate it. Kills it, deactivates it. Jimmy i dont know about you, im convinced, it deactivates it and gives you super powers, too. If you dont know who jim baker is, he was a televangelist and went to prison. And that silver stuff isnt even the weirdest product hes selling. That would be this. It is a bucket of freeze dried mexican food for the apocalypse called the fiesta pail. Fiesta and pail, two words that go together like chewing gum and soup. The food and the pail is said toto be the realo dealo. It passes the official mexican test. This is mexican food that reallive mexicans approve of, you know, this is not gringo food. This is good, good food. Jimmy guillermo, is that food that reallive mexicans approve of . Guillermo no, thats terrible. Jimmy hes not telling the truth . Guillermo no. Jimmy yesterday in russia they passed a bill that will allow Vladimir Putin to remain in power until 2036, 12 years longer than he was supposed to be ruling can somebody please hide all the newspapers in the white house from donald trump . Because if he sees this, were in for a long run. Putin squeaked by with a narrow 150 of the vote. It went 383 yes, zero nos, fior real. That will allow him to be in office until hes 83, thats almost old enough to run the united states. It was a good night for joe biden. He won in michigan and three other states. Owes g hes got a big edge on Bernie Sanders. You remember when that guy nik wallenda walked across an active volcano . Thats what its going to feel like watching joe biden open his mouth every day between now and november. Many are crediting [ applause ] many are giving credit to bidens victory to his new Campaign Strategy of grabbing voters by the arm and saying, look here, jack, youre a jerk who can go to hell. Biden did well with voters over 45, and Bernie Sanders did better with voters under 45. If youve had a colonoscopy, bidens your guy. Tulsi fwab ard Tulsi Gabbard is running in the way cats was running for an academy award. Im joe biden, and i have met brau barack obama. I have stood next to him. I have sat behind him, i have touched him. I have even smelled his neck. As we like to say to each other a lot, when we are together, which is often, yes, weve met. I am barack obama, and i am in aruba, floating on a tube. Jimmy thats still better than no malarkey, right . We have a great show tonight. Music from grace vanderwaal. Eiza gonzalez is here. And well be right back with david spade. So stick around. [cheers and applause] dicky Abcs Jimmy Kimmel live, brought to you by mazda. Fishrisotto. Buffalo. Buffalo Wild Wings gelato. Curry. Cacciatori. Chimichurri. Frie flurry. mcdonalds cheese cake. Cheesecake Factory grilled steak. Clam bake. Milkshake. We are americas kitchen. Doordash. Every flavor welcome. Start maxximizing today in store and online. Yeah, that needs mmm. Thats better. Hvr seasoning. You either love it or you really love it. Alright, i got everyones ftuna for jj. Turkey for tj. Turkey for jj. Tuna for tj. Jj turkey, tj tuna. Tj tuna, turkey jj. Yeah, mom. This is why we named your brother derek. Italian bmt, my favorite. Nobody asked, derek. Get a free footlong yup, free. When you buy one on the subway app, for a limited time. Order now. Wild thing, you make my heart sing. You make everything. Groovy. Done yet . Yeah, yeah, sorry, sorry. You sure . Hmm. Mmm. Come on, come on, wild thing. If you ride, you get it. Geico motorcycle. Fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. Jimmy hi, welcome back. Tonight, from the new movie bloodshot with vin diesel, Eiza Gonzalez is here. Then later with a song from her film stargirl on disney plus, grace vanderwaal from the mercedesbenz stage. [cheers and applause] tomorrow night i will be out hosting the show who wants to be a millionaire, which will air here on abc next month and in my stead, mayor Pete Buttigieg will be filling in as host. His guests will be sir patrick stewart, tony hale and music from jhene iko and miguel. So please join mayor pete for that tomorrow night as he hosts the show. Our first guest is a very funny man with a very funny show that is on every night against ours, which is rude. Lights out with david spade is on weeknights on comedy central. Please say hello to david spade. [cheers and applause] hey yeah, man. Jimmy how are you doing . Hello, james. Jimmy you feeling okay today . Now that the bachelors over your life has no meaning anymore, does it . What to look forward to. I did watch it last night. Jimmy of course you watched it last night. I sometimes hit him up about it. I know you know all the tricks. Jimmy i like to watch your Instagram Stories and you take pictures of the tv screen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What a loser, but i do. I got into it last night. First of all, last night was the big ending. Most people sort of know what happened. Its like this big. Its all girls, it looks like rush week at delta gamma. They have one guy in the room. And then they have, they do the flashback. Is what happened is hannah ann, the final two, hannah ann. He takes them to australia, of course the farthest place. And they get there, and then im always surprised at like hannah b doesnt pop out of a kangaroo pouch. Hey, yall, remember me . But the other ones a virgin, madison. Jimmy uhhuh. Thats right. So some appeal. I get whats going on, but she dumped him twice. Jimmy she did. And hannah anns only crime is she was nice and normal and no drama, and of course he was like, aye, the other way. So he proposes to her, and then a month later, hes like, can i have that ring back . Its so, its so weird. And then he, he tries to get the other one back, but theyre on the show, live, and its just cringe time, because the mom is like this, barb, you see barb . Really daggers. Jimmy oh, yeah, she was not happy at all. And they had a little barb cam in the corner. When theyd show shed be like, and she didnt get her. And hes like, mom, its going to be madison now, and shes like, what . And hes like, quit yelling, mom, thats my girlfriend. Shes yelling at her. Shes like, i dont like this one. Jimmy david is not exaggerating one tiny bit. She was just all over, and you know poor madison, and shows shoes so wiped out from flying and those heavy eyelashes. I didnt know if those were carryon. I dont know if theyre legal. Jimmy i had a long talk with somebody about those last night about whether they were real or not. Beautiful girl, but they had to give them both extensions. Theyre both pretty already. But they really l. A. Ed them up. Youre pretty, but not enough. So they get out there, and its like l. A. Of course, from like normal places. But the mom, i dont know what happens, so shes like yelling going you know he puts mentos in cokes, trying to kill the whole thing, the virgin was like, oh. Jimmy got involved even. It was bad. But it was fun just to watch the whole shenanigans. Jimmy you enjoyed it. Which do you like better, bachelor or bachelorette . I dont know. Its all about the same. I just make fun of whatevers in front of me. Jimmy whatevers in front of you. I like it all. Jimmy do you schedule your life around the show . Do you go out on a monday or tuesday . I do sort of work in the day. They get a little nuts with, its a monday through friday edition. Im like, [ bleep ], man. Three hours each night, and theyre really milking it. Its like a tenminute show but its really stretched out. Give something to kitty, meow jimmy they can tighten it up a little bit. Theres some easy trims. How long are you supposed to touch your face . Ten minutes a day . So they, oh, yeah. So i went to dinner. Jimmy you talk, ill touch your face. I for sure have it now. So i, i went to dinner. Jimmy sorry. [ applause ] i ruined the story. Where did you go to dinner . And when was this . Im more concerned about the bachelor than the coronavirus. I went to dinner, and sometimes i get dissed. Well, obviously, in the earlier days, like right when i moved to l. A. , i got l. A. Ed because the maitre d was all snooty, he goes right this way, ladies, and i go. [ laughter ] and i was like, and then she was like, you know, are you a girl . And i go, no. So im walking in, hey, joe dirt, yeah, im a guy. So we start walking. I cant wait until this guy sees its me, hes going to freak out. Then he sees some stairs and looks right at me and says watch your step, gals. I am a sir i like to order first. Thiss kind of rude, and im hungry. And sometimes when i get there, i cant drink until i eat. I like to have a few knocks, especially before the bachelor. And i go hey, man, can i order steak now . Is that okay if i just get things going . He does it, then 15 minutes later im looking for it. He comes back, hey, can i take your order . Hey, bub, any eyes on that steak . Can we get a 20 on it . Oh, you want it now . Yeah, why did i order it when i walked in, hey, give me a steak. And he goes hey, two seconds. And now this thing when they avoid you . They walk by your table, like la, la, la. Table 41, [ bleep ]. He keeps doing this, and hes being weird, you know. And then a few minutes later, hes like, remember me . Now were friends again. Jimmy yeah, well, good. So it all worked out. I get crabby. Jimmy i dont know if this is something youd be willing to share, but i, would you tell, i want to take a break. When we come back, will you tell the story, there was a major, triple major celebrity, with whom you had longtime bad blood. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Jimmy you know what im talking about . Oh, yes, i do. Jimmy david spade is here. Well be right back with this. [cheers and applause] dicky portions of Jimmy Kimmel Live is brought to you by paneras new unlimited coffee subscription. Panera, your cup is always full. ] unlimited coffee for 8. 99 a month. Panera, your cup is always full. Written for the bold thand the daredevils. Ny what happens here. Only happens here. Iim not just here to be theach fotoken female,ncisco 49ers. Im here to help us win. The surface pro helps me get whats in my head and get it out on to the field. Peshould become at scelebrity accountant. And, i tell them, nobody should. But, i just dont think you need a separate private plane. But i, but i want it hey, buddy. Whats the damage . I bought it the waterfall . Nope a new volkswagen. A volkswagen . i think were having a breakthrough here. Welcome to caesars palace. Thank you. If youre 55 and up, tmobile has a plan designed just for you. And, for a limited time only, were making it an even better deal. Now you can get two lines for only 55. That includes unlimited talk, text and data. With no annual service contracts. It also includes talk, text and data when traveling in mexico and canada. So if youre 55 and up, you can now get two lines for only 55. Because at tmobile, we have a plan designed just for you. Jimmy we are back with the great david spade. He has a Television Show of his very own, called lights out with david spade. You dont have a guillermo on your show. You cant just find those. God sends them to you when youve been good. Yeah, dime a dozen. [cheers and applause] jimmy how long have you been doing the show now . Oh, i dont even know. Well, weve, we just did 100 episodes, since july i guess. Jimmy so not quite a year. Oh, thank you, 100 episodes. [cheers and applause] you, have you done a hundred yet . Jimmy yeah, a few more than that. Yeah, i knew youd get there. Jimmy is it what you imagine td wou d it would be, this life . I thought id breeze in and do a couple jokes like i do here, but its a little more planning and strategizing, its more get up at 7 00 go in, and its all day. I dont know how. You see this show, and you think [ bleep ], whats this guy do. Jimmy meetings. So many things going on. Jimmy you have to put on makeup, the whole thing, its a mess. And the new thing, no crowds. Jimmy you guys are not going to have an audience starting on monday. And i dont know what to do about that. Because this is a great crowd. We have great crowds. [cheers and applause] jimmy its real. They are a good crowd. But i have no idea how that will work, know what i mean . Ive done standup for ten people and stuff on a good night. Jimmy have you done standup for no people . I have not done it for no, i dont know what ill do, it will be my manager with his two dogs going, and the dog going rrrr. I dont know. Jimmy well have to figure it out. Ive been trying to figure out what were going to do. You know, youre like, oh, maybe we you havent have people in a room together. Then but it to target, and theres 8,000 people in there. He said wheel of fortune didnt, listen, those guys are waiting three hours in line to watch a game show, theyre sort of dead on the inside already . Theyre watching roulette jimmy lets get to this story. Okay, so heres the story. Youre involved in this. Jimmy im involved. Before the grammys, ted, a buddy of ours, has a pregrammy party. It was no cameras, it was just 20, i think, comedy people and their dates, right . Jimmy right. So its, you know, and kevin hart. Jimmy tiffany haddish. They put me next to you, which is fine. Jimmy and i get along. And this shnisnt an act. Were all bsing, and before the thing, ted said you guys are cool, right . We had this weird thing. Jimmy for those who dont know, there may be people who dont know. Theres something i said on saturday night live years and years ago when i was on. Jimmy whatd you say . I just said a joke about him. And he wasnt in the mood for it. And he yelled at me. And we carried that grudge forever. So 30 years later. Oh, my god, davids at least 30. So 30 years later he finally hosts snl and says, you know, its still awkward for me and him. I never see the guy. But i feel bad for him. I never see him out, so i go i dont care if hes here, its fine. Hes over there, and were over here, and im talking and tap on the shoulder. Jimmy can i tell you my point of view . Im talking and i see him coming und up behind you, okay. This could go bad. Jimmys going to be my backup. I dont know if thats a good idea. I think i might need chappell over there. I go huh . And he goes hey, man, can i talk to you . And im like, jimmy, jimmy ts go time. Jimmy i go like this. He gives me a hug, and he says, you know, hey, this is stupid, whatever. So we talked about snl and some other stuff for a while. Super cool dude, fan before, still a fan. I just felt bad. I was a little thorn in his side for all that time. But were all good now. It was fun. Jimmy if only our leaders in washington. Yes, why cant our jimmy nations of the middle east, if they could just come together the way you and eddie murphy did, what a beautiful planet this would be. Wed fix everything in one dinner. Jimmy it is always a treat to have you on the show. Your show is very funny lights out with david spade, week nights, 11 35 on comedy central, next week, with no laughs well be right back in america we all count. No matter where we call home, how we worship, or who we love. And the 2020 census is how that great promise is kept. Because this is the count that informs where hundreds of billions in funding will go each year for things like education, healthcare, and programs that touch us all. Shape your future. Start here. Learn more at 2020census. Gov this is gonna be americas favorite breakfast. They just dont know it yet. ding these are a few of my favorite things. Wendys uses freshcracked eggs on all our breakfast sandwiches. Not whatever. This stuff is. ding thats right. See you in the morning you up for this . Musi ladies and gentlemen shadow featuring de la soul get ready, yall get ready ready set jump to the rhythm as hard as you can go keep it steady steady, to the letter, right . Turn it up, we giving a show hey hey hey, whatd i miss . Ready, set steady, bet burrito. Raw kitfo. Fried shiso. French fry. Iced chai. Tasty. Pad thai. Baked pie. Half stack. Taco pack. Lobster mac. Baby back. Pork chop. Soda pop. Kebab. Soursop. Hot pot. Im hungry now. Noodle soup. Cantaloupe. Ice cream scoop. Whipped cream bloop. Dumpling. Chicken wing. Peking. And those crispy onion rings. We are americas kitchen. Doordash. Every flavor welcome. We are americas kitchen. Im the founder of the honey pot. My name is beatrice dixon. In the beginning it wasnt easy to, like, start this company. And there was a lot of times that it almost didnt happen. If target didnt take the chance on us, we wouldnt be in all the retailers that were in today. But whats really dope, is they helped us with the product line, the packaging. They really, like, changed my life. The reason why its so important for honey pot to do well is so the next black girl that comes up with a great idea, she could have a better opportunity. That means a lot to me. Youve joined jimmy johns youve placed your first order. Lets see what you win oh, incredible another winner free sandwich sign up for freaky fast rewards® and earn a free sandwich after your first order. And my lack of impulse control, is about to become your problem. Ahh no, come on. I saw you eating poop earlier. Hey my focus is on the road, and thats saving me cash with drivewise. Whos the dummy now . Whoof whoof so get allstate where good drivers save 40 for avoiding mayhem, like me. Sorry hes a baby protect your pet with the 1 name in flea and tick protection. Frontline plus. Trusted by vets for nearly 20 years. Kfcs 20 fillups. Choose from original recipe, extra crispy, or tenders. Get it with all the fixins and feed your whole family for just 20 bucks now hurry up and choose, youre hungry kfc its Finger Lickin good jimmy welcome back. We have got music coming up, but first i wanted to im sorry, one second. Guillermo . Guillermo . Guillermo. What are you doing . Guillermo what does it look like im doing, jimmy . Im finally finish my memoir. Jimmy your what . Memoir . Guillermo memoir. Jimmy youre usually slower than a tortoise in a tarpit. What has gotten into you . Ill tell you whats gotten into me, jimmy, panera coffee. Jimmy wow. 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Protection from the sun. Jimmy hi, welcome back to the show. Still to come, music from grace vanderwaal. Our next guest began her acting career in telenovelas and has since graduated to gigante movies like baby driver and hobbs and shaw. Next, she stars alongside vin diesel in bloodshot. It opens friday. Please say hello to Eiza Gonzalez. [cheers and applause] jimmy its great to have you back. I see your mom has returned. Shes back. Jimmy the last time you were here, you brought your mom. Yes, i did. Jimmy hi, mom, how are you . How are you doing . Hello, mommy. Hello. I still dont speak spanish. I mean, english. I hope you do still speak spanish. Jimmy you dont speak any english . Well how do you know what im saying right now . She understood enough, because she lives in mexico city, so she came to visit. Its a tradition, every time i have a premiere, i i have bring. She knew enough, she came to immigration, and they ask the usual questions, what are you doing in the states . My daughter lives here, what does she do, shes an actress. Anything that ive everybody seen her in . Yeah, shes in baby driver. Oh, the girl who lost her green card jumping in the sky. And shes like, what . And they said, i saw it on jimmy kimmel. Were they asking because they wanted to get rid of me . Jimmy thats right. The last time you were on the show and your mom was here, you told the story of jumping out of the plane and losing your green card, and the tsa is always watching us, i guess. Yes, they love you. Hi, everyone at tsa. Please dont send me to secondary. Jimmy what is secondary . Secondary checkups for everyone who is not american. Jimmy everyone whos not american or everyone whos not american and looks like you and they want to spend a little time in secondary with you . I wish. Sometimes they will say something, and theyre like jimmy they dont want to you sneak. Now they will, because theyre being shout out here on kimmel. And i love you guys. Jimmy you just had a big birthday, right . 30 years old. God, yes. Jimmy how do you feel about that . About my birthday . Jimmy about your birthday. I hate birthdays. I think its the most narcissistic thing weve invented. You force all your friends to come, bring you gifts and pretend like you love me and sing to me, because thats what my birthdays for, for everyone to kiss my butt. I just hate it. And i was turning 30, which is a big number for a girl, as you can imagine. Girls out here . 30 is a big one. You get nervous, because you dont get away anything anymore, and you think im a woman, you know. I felt very secure about myself. But long story short, i said im going to have a very tame, like just very easy birthday. I was going to do a little thing at a bar, and then going to the super bowl, which is my version of, i love football. Jimmy you really love football. I really love football. Jimmy whats your team . A team that will never clearly see a super bowl, called the cowboys. Jimmy theyve seen many super bowls. I mean lately, lately. Jimmy the cowboys were not in the super bowl for your birthday. The niners and the chiefs. The chiefs, yeah. Jimmy who were you rooting for there . I originally was rooting for the 49ers, but it was, so we went to present at the nfl honors, im sure youve done that beforele. They ta they take a big group and in that group was paul rudd and his kid. Jimmy big chiefs fan. I was rooting for the 49ers, i was the only one there rooting for the 49ers, and he, they were so excited that i was just like, im going to root for them now. Jimmy you switched over. I switched. This was really cute. Every time something would happen, because we at a, like one of those balconies. Jimmy a sky box. A sky box, and there were a couple fans underneath. Theyd be ah, ah, ah, it was like, whoa, youve never seen anything like this. To the point that when they won, his kid had a nose bleed. It was crazy, and hes ah, ah. And im like, your nose is bleeding. And hes like, we finally won and he would hug me, and i would be, like, i guess the bloods nice. Jimmy pauls kid had a nose bleed. They were so happy. Congratulations to them. It was a big thing for them. Jimmy its called the rudd blood. When it comes out, you know theyve won something. You switched over to that team. I did. Jimmy then did you go out . What did you do in miami . It all started backtracking to my birthday, right . It was going to be a chill birthday, so i ended up going to this bar, this little thing, and then it turned out to one shots, two shots, three shots four. Someone threw up on my cake. Jimmy really . Yeah. I had footage. And like the best part was coming back from miami, because jimmy what . You watched the hangover. It was like that. Jimmy it was like that . I opened my phone, i was like, whoa, what is going on here . And it became a big blur of four days completely drunk and ended at like, you know theres all these afterparties. Jimmy yeah, the super bowl, sure. In miami. Jimmy it gets crazy. It gets crazy. My people love a celebration, you know, theres a lot of latinos out there, we love this music. There was this crazy afterparty that we didnt know we going to go until i got there. And there was a strip club. Jimmy oh, really . You didnt know you were no, it was like somebodys afterparty. Snoop doggs going to perform. Im like, i want to see snoop dogg, until you discover its snoop dogg at a strip club. Jimmy was it a good performance . It was amazing, you know why . I heard that rappers thing about sing about strippers. Jimmy yeah. And i was like, they all fall in love with them. What is this thing . They all fall in love with them, do they spend a lot of time there . Whats the drill . Jimmy uhhuh. And so i was there. And like after an hour i was like, doo, doo, doo. I didnt really know what to do. So i sat down, and there was a stripper giving a lap dance next to me, and i was like, so whats going on, and shes like, well, yeah, you know, and we started having a full conversation about our lives. Jimmy mmhm. As she twerked. And it was really impressive. And then she was like, you know, my back really hurts. Because i was like, how do you do this . This is impressive. Its like Cirque Du Soleil with butts. It was like athletes. And she was like, i have to get my body worked, massages, my back hurts all the time. Okay, noted, can you teach me how to do this . Sure. We exchanged numbers. Were friends. Jimmy oh, really . Youre in love with a stripper now . Im in love with a stripper. Shes amazing. Jimmy you made a friend. Thats where the closest friendships are made. I love her so much, you know they have the money. It was another stripper trying to take herman, and money, and , no thats my girls money. Back up, back up. I was helping her. Were best friends. Jimmy it sounds like. I bet your mother is thrilled. I sent her a video. She had a ball. Jimmy oh, really, all right. Its great to see you. Bloodshot opens in theatres friday and well return with music from grace vanderwaal. [cheers and applause] dicky the Jimmy Kimmel Live Concert Series is presented by the amg gt fourdoor coupe. Mercedes amg, driving performance. You know, the happiest place on earth, but. Have you flown the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy . Or channeled your inner jedi . You gotta love that. Have you raced through radiator springs . Or struck a power pose with them . Now is the perfect time to feel like this. And this. And definitely that. Kids enjoy the magic for just 67 per child per day, with a 3day 1park per day ticket. Dicky the Jimmy Kimmel Live Concert Series is brought to you by mercedes benz. The best or nothing. Jimmy thanks to david spade and Eiza Gonzalez. Apologies to matt damon, nightline is next, but first, from the original soundtrack for stargirl, here with the song today and tomorrow, grace vanderwaal [cheers and applause] but i can see your stardust shining back at me as i catch you fallin into me fallin into you lettin go of all the things i thought were true fallin into me as im fallin into you it seems so clear but i dont know what to do one day ill be old and ugly will you still be thinking of me if we were as brave as we are now and ill catch you thinking of me as im thinking of you lettin go of all the things i thought were true as youre fallin into me and im fallin into you it seems so clear but i dont know what to do ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ahahah ahahah hmmhmm mmm mmm [cheers and applause] this is nightline. Tonight, the president facing the pandemic head on. The virus will not have a chance against us. No nation is more prepared or more resilient than the united states. Extreme measures to try to stop covid19. Smart action today will help prevent the spread of the virus tomorrow. After a stark warning. Bottom line, its going to get worse. Families divided by the virus. Inside the nations first contagion zone. And now the nba suspending the season after one player tests positive. And

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