Transcripts For GBN Headliners 20240702

Over to our headliners. Hello and welcome to headliners. Its your first look at saturdays newspapers with three comedians. Thats me andrew doyle. And im joined tonight by the big dog, nick dixon and the little pussycat, Steve N Allen. Im hoping that catches on. Yeah, because, yeah, you do that very well and youve got a very sort of affectionate quality which people at home dont really gather. But i, you know, the way you behave here and i can reach if thats what the question was, very flexible. You are you are certainly flexible that one of your greatest. Is that what you imputes . Is that what you imputes . No, not at all. No, not at all. But since youve mentioned it, how are you, nick . Im well. Yeah, yeah. Im well. Yeah, yeah. Loving life. You know me. People people are trying to attack me all the time, andrew, but im just very chilled going with the flow of the universe. Youre like titanium. Like that song . Absolutely. Shoot me down, but i wont fall. There you go. That should be your slogan. That should be your slogan. Anyway, lets have a look at saturdays front pages before we dig in. The daily mail is leading with reeves. Ill never play leading with reeves. Ill never play fast and loose with your money. Sounds like a lyric. That one. The money. Sounds like a lyric. That one. The telegraph has got inheritance tax against tory values, says hunt. The guardian is running with un Top Court Orders israel to halt assault on rafah. The times are leading with gove quits politics as more tories stand down. The express has got the same story there about michael gove. And finally the daily star. About michael gove. And finally the daily star. Weve beaten the the daily star. Weve beaten the curse of snoring with wait for it didgeridoos. Those were your front pages. Right. So were front pages. Right. So were kicking off our look into saturdays front pages. Im saturdays front pages. Im going to start with the mirror, steve, and theyre going with quite a partisan headline now. Gove quits sunak sinking ship. Theres a reason its not just partisan. Theres more punnery at work in there. Oh yes. So the main headline thing is that michael gove has decided to not continue the fight. He now joins. I mean, according to the article, it was 77. I think this was before Andrea Leadsom. Yes, was before Andrea Leadsom. Yes, he was 78, 78. Maybe my panini sticker book of tories is now incredibly out of date, and im gonna have to start collecting it. This is whats really annoying about the general election. The sinking ship thing is, because there was an event that rishi sunak went to the titanic museum. Yes, but i think if they were , its not great pr, if they were, its not great pr, though. Its like turning up to the, you know, the museum of pooch screwing and see what the headunes pooch screwing and see what the headlines are going to be. Why would you do that . Why would you . But having said that, i think the mirror ran this headune think the mirror ran this headline knowing full well that you know what they dont like them. Do they . No. Thats true. Yeah. I them. Do they . No. Thats true. Yeah. I mean, it works on both levels. They think its a sinking ship. Well, i mean, people are evacuating it. Not not everything that gets evacuated is a sinking ship. But there might be some similarities. Its true. Nick, the thing about this is , you the thing about this is, you know, shouldnt you stick it out as a tory and even knowing that youre going to lose, shouldnt youre going to lose, shouldnt you just stick it out for the good of the party . Im not talking about gove specifically. Im talking about everyone. Yeah, i suppose you dont want to sit on the opposition benches. You know, youre lining up some sort of job with nick clegg or something at facebook. Youre thinking about your next move. I mean , goves been there move. I mean, goves been there a long time, hasnt he . I mean, he has he it is it is interesting. He was good on education. If he speaks to people like toby young, whove done a lot of work on free schools, people say he was very strong on education. Yeah. And he talks about the toll office can take. And i do sympathise with that because you have to remember the person that ended up killing sir david amess was scouting out Michael Goves house first. So this is a very real danger now. No, its scary. Yeah. No, its scary. Yeah. So you understand having been through things like that, you might think, oh ive had enough, especially as were going to get slammed anyway. The only thing i found strange is long resignation letter. He said ive tried to fight for greater social justice, which i found very strange. You have to very strange. You have to remember this. Gove was a newtonian conservative. He was receiving the salisbury review at age 16, the late sir Roger Scrutons magazine. Yes. And scrutons magazine. Yes. And scruton was very against the idea of social justice. This is a left wing concept that is sort of tied in with the kind of zero sum politics of resentment , he sum politics of resentment, he claimed. So for a sort of conservative to talk about social justice, very , very odd, social justice, very, very odd, which might suggest, might relate to some of the confusion we see in the conservative party. Maybe. I mean, although the social justice means Different Things to different people, doesnt it . Thats the thing. And it can mean something very different to i mean, the levelling up is levelling. Exactly. They would say levelling up meant meritocracy. Yeah, he meant something different. But its just a strange phrase to come. Yes, i suppose it is. I think youre right. I think gove did did do some good things for her, for education and was really because he got slammed for it, but actually trying to reintroduce sort of traditional, liberal arts, liberal education that strikes me as a really good thing. And we sort of suffering from the fact that we havent really properly implemented it. Yeah. Slammed by the teachers as well, who didnt particularly like it. It was very much like that. That was a domestic. They could have sought that out on their own. Yes, very much so. He talks about, you know, the massive improvements in, you know, math skills and literacy and things like that. So i do think he did some good work there. Yeah. But yeah, disaster for rishi, for someone so big in the past. Yeah. I mean im not so much concerned about gove insofaras. I just think all of these 72, 73, 78, up to 7880 since we since we did. Yeah, it just keeps ticking up, you know, that. Thats just not a good look is it . I mean, they really have thrown in the towel from the looks of things. Anyway, were going to move on to the next story. This is in the mail. Mail on saturday. What are they leading with. So theyve got reeves. Ill never play fast and loose with your money. Which of course is Rachel Reeves, shadow chancellor no doubt going to be the chancellor. And its shes been doing this for a while, this kind of thatcherite thing. Shes talking about sound money. Yeah. And shes talking about she wont soak businesses and crush entrepreneurs and that there wont be the typical tax and spend that we expect from laboun spend that we expect from labour. I mean, i still think there will i still wonder where any of the money is going to come from or what theyre going to be able to do in the position were in. But apparently the magic money tree. Yeah, but i guess its another way theyre distancing themselves from the left. You know, corbyn starmers been distancing himself a lot from corbyn. And now corbyns going to be an independent. And so its very much this this new new new labour maybe. Yeah. New labour maybe. Yeah. And you know, the fact that this is one of those articles which is based on the fact that the daily mail has got a scoop, you know, Rachel Reeves is writing specifically for them. So if you look in the inside the papen so if you look in the inside the paper, youll have the full interview. And this is the scoop. This is the sort of highlights on the front page. Is that a sign as well . The fact that a sign as well . The fact that the shadow chancellor is writing for the daily mail . Yeah. Well, i mean, it wasnt that long ago that keir starmer was writing in the telegraph where he said the flack for it, but he got flack. Its not really changed the poll. Its not like he suddenly lost that poll lead by saying ill tell you who i think was a great leader, margaret thatcher, paul still does all right, isnt it . No, i know i erwin james was angry about it, but i think, well, you know, but i think thats the thing. Its like they do want to appeal to both sides, you know, the idea that there is such a thing as a labour voter and a tory voter that shouldnt be in your mind as a politician, every vote should be possible. Well, as you go into an election, you cant really win with a system that we have. If with a system that we have. If you dont have an offering that is palatable to the Centre Ground , but no one wants to say ground, but no one wants to say it because its boring and you all you get, you do better on social media. If you say no, we should go more in the other direction. Lets get more extreme. But when you need an entire nation of people, statistically most of whom dont agree with you to vote on things, youve got to sell it to the centre. But do we trust labour with the money, nick . Do you . I labour with the money, nick . Do you . I mean, they havent got a great track record. No. And weve got, weve got all this debt problems. Weve got all sorts of financial problems. I dont and i dont see where theyre going to get the money. I dont trust them with the money, but i dont trust them with anything. So were going to just, you know, were going to just, you know, we continual collapse. Do you trust them . Steve well, i actually even even i dont know because i understand this would be the message that you should put out there. They know the kryptonite for the labour party is bad rep to do with money. So send someone or there is going to be like, no, ive got a spreadsheet and make us feel safe. The balance is on the front page though, because bofis the front page though, because Boris Johnsons written for them as well, saying starmer would be the most dangerous and left wing labour pm since the 1970s. That sounds like a shocking thing. So you think how many have there been . Yes. The only caveat i will offer, sorry, is i think people like the bank of england or the ons, whoever it is. Do i mean not ons . Thats statistics. Whats the one obr obs which is obr obr. People like that are going to work better with labour. You know the people that kind of stitched up truss. According to truss, the Civil Service and so on, they all work better. The one that stitched up with laboun the one that stitched up with labour. Shes done a sort of state sort of saying that everyone the deep state will be on labours side is what im saying. So maybe that makes a difference. Maybe. And of course, reeves would be the first female chancellor, so theyd be catching up with the tories two female Prime Ministers, three, three. Im sorry, its just. Did three. Im sorry, itsjust. Did you forget which one was only there for 40 days . Anyway, lets move on, with the next one. This is the telegraph. And the telegraph has, an inheritance tax story that were not really interested in. Yeah, but the headuneis interested in. Yeah, but the headline is inheritance tax against tory values, says hunt. Its a shame hes not the chancellor. So he could have fixed this when he did a budget or something interesting. Why does it leave . Why does it leave . Scrap it. But anyway, net zero policy could raise pollutant deaths. Is the story. Its down the bottom. But it is interesting. Yes. All of this work to try and achieve net zero includes a lot of insulation. I believe people protested about insulating britain. We had to, you know, have have cars idling on the m25 to improve pollutants. Im sure that helped. But the point is you make places too airtight. So the pollutants get trapped in. I mean, the whole article doesnt mention that. Thats not how mention that. Thats not how its meant to be. Youre meant to have ventilation. You have Heat Exchangers to warm the cold air coming in. Yes. Weve got the technology that solves most of the problems they go on about. Yes if you have a house and you hermetically seal it, its a bit bad for you. But weve always been terrible as a nafion weve always been terrible as a nation when it comes to caring about pollutants. You know, the rest of the world. When they found out about coal, they had like boilers and things, and we were just the one place that went no open fire. We want to see the coal and breathe in all the stuff that gets our lungs. Yes, but its very romantic. It yes, but its very romantic. It looks nice of a winter eve. Yeah for the first 40 years of your life, until youre coughing up all that black lung. Thats how. Thats how we conquer the world. Open fires. Conquer the world. Open fires. Thats what i believe in. And young boys up chimneys. Thats how we did it. Yeah. Resilience. Resilience, resilience. Resilience, resilience. And we had a workforce. We had 100 employment. If you were ten, you worked up a chimney. Exactly. And you know, youve got emphysema and silicosis and all the rest of it. But it didnt matter because we had an empire. Yeah what kind of diseases . That one is the war. There we go , were going to move there we go, were going to move on now to the daily star and, totally different story, nick. Its very different. Its weve beaten the curse of snoring with didgeridoos. And as you might expect, its boffins. They love their boffins. They love their boffins. Yes, boffins. Its seagulls. Yes, boffins. Its seagulls. In this case, its boffins that have come to the rescue. Its doctor sophie bostock. I dont know how she feels about being called a boffin , but she has called a boffin, but she has said that learning to play the didgeridoo can cure snoring somehow. Ive skimmed it, but its something to do with sleep apnoea. Podcast cover. Whos snoring . Podcast cover. Whos snoring . I believe its a stock image. Oh, stock image. Im familiar with his work, christopher hitchens, but its not. But why is he you know, hes got a pizza. I think eating late at night might be the problem with that chap, i would suggest. Yeah, yeah. And you dont just sleep with your didgeridoo issue as well. Maybe. Maybe. How do you. Steve, youre a didgeridoo expert. How does how doesit didgeridoo expert. How does how does it cure snoring . Its to do does it cure snoring . Its to do with strengthen up the muscles, especially the tongue bit further back. And it just means that that stuff then doesnt collapse in when you fall asleep. Can you demonstrate that you have you have a well, it just so happens i always travel with my didgeridoo. Yes. And, normally ive got a longer one than this. Which. Oh, boaster you were, you were you were you were you . Were you . Yeah. Hes been bringing it in for two years. This is the first time its been useful. Cant believe i keep emailing boffins. And this is the first time theyve actually written about it. And there we go. You finally got. That was probably Cultural Appropriation. Almost certainly. And i dont really believe youre playing that. So what im doing, ill show you. Were you were you . Im you. Were you were you . Im making the didgeridoo sound. Yeah. Thats what they all do. Theyre frauds. Every theyre all frauds. Every didgeridoo player is a fraud. Okay so. Well, thats the end of part one. But coming up in part two, were going to be discussing Keir Starmers plans north of the border. The counter protest in london and the uns top courts directive for israel. Please do not go welcome back to headliners. Your first look at saturdays newspapers with me, andrew doyle and my comedian buddies, Steve N Allen and nick dixon. We dont use the word buddies, now, do we . I like it, im going to bnng we . I like it, im going to bring it back anyway. I should say that we are actually hosting a night with the headliners live. Thats stand up comedy with arne slot stand up comedians. You can come along and join us for an evening of comedy thatll be in london, on the 3rd of june, and you can meet us all, chat with us in the bar afterwards. Ill be there doing a bit of a set. Leo kearse will be performing, simon evans will be performing, simon evans will be performing, josh howie will be performing, josh howie will be performing all on the 3rd of june. If you want to come along to that. For more information, just scan the qr code that is presently on the screen right now. So get up and scan it because its about to disappear. Or you can visit gbnews. Com. Thats the other alternative. But do come along and enjoy the show and say hello. Anyway, were going to begin this section now with saturdays telegraph keir starmer sharma has his sights set on scotland. Steve yep. Starmer says he needs to win scotland to become Prime Minister. Then you read the article and you realise hes not saying he needs to. Hes saying ineed saying he needs to. Hes saying i need to in that, like mathematically, is he like he could he could not win a single seat in scotland. Still have seat in scotland. Still have enoughif seat in scotland. Still have enough if the polls are accurate. Yes. Although the more seats he gets in scotland, labour gets in scotland, the less of an unprecedented swing is required elsewhere. So it would be beneficial. But hes saying need is in kind of like hey come on guy need you know dont walk out on me. I need you right now. Yeah, and the reason is because emotionally. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I mean, he doesnt hes not really playing the game, is it . Like, everyone else has done the stuff for him. He stands a good chance of doing well in scotland because the snp imploded in the same way he does well elsewhere, because the tories. This is like a fight scene in the 1981 film condorman. Its not a reference to everyones going to get, but its in three days of the condon whats condor man . Whats condor man . Condor man is Michael Crawford is a super as a as an agent, but he doesnt really know hes a spy. And he keeps, you know, like in comedy where hell just duck down to pick up a case while a bullet goes past it. Michael crawford is in some mothers do. Yeah. So its a comedy, im guessing. Yeah. 1981. Condor. If youd have hit us with lawnmower man, then yeah, yeah, nick and i would have got no fight scenes where the bad guys beat themselves up accidentally. And thats exactly politically, its a better reference than. Youre all giving me credit. I actually love the idea of this film, so i am going to watch no one in the country has watched that film. Nobody. I lost everyone just turned off. Honestly, for tonight will show in that exact second everyone clicked on. I googled it to make sure it wasnt like a cheese dream that i. I] i. I was i. I was thinking Michael Crawford in the film. Lets lets move it back to the story. Are you like the new Louis Schaefer . Are you slightly, have you have mixed feelings about this . Insofaras, you know, labour, you know, taking over scotland wouldnt be great. On the other hand, its quite nice the idea that the snps grip, their one party grip over scotland, will finally be obliterated. Tricky one for me. Its like who do i want to win the league . Liverpool or man city . Its one of those yeah, i hate the snp, i hate labour, i dont hate scotland. No im joking guys scotland. No im joking guys joking about that. I just thought itd be suddenly you set fire to that kilt. Earlier i saw your scottish cousins love scotland. Great people. But, the thing is great golf courses. The thing is great golf courses. The thing is great golf courses. The thing is. Yes. And itd be great thing is. Yes. And itd be great to obliterate the snp. They would deserve it. Their would deserve it. Their weakness, though, will allow this crushing labour majority. I mean, i dont think tony blair in one of his landslides even needed scotland. They wont need scotland , as you say. He just scotland, as you say. He just wants scotland. I love this sentence. The numbers are sentence. The numbers are important, but theres something very deep about the way i see politics. Is there or is it just complete opportunism and shallowness . Yeah. An affiliation for scotland. An affiliation for scotland. Did he go to school in scotland . Well blair did, blair did . Yeah. His dad was a scottish toolmaker. Was he scottish . Was he scottish . Ive no idea. Ive no idea. No scottish today. No scottish today. He probably was. Yeah. He probably was. Yeah. Hes making the point though that it because they have a or have had a situation where the parties that they vote for arent the ones running the country. Yes. And then you can moan about it, but the same is true. Thats the system. There are places in the south west that vote lib dem and theyre never going to have a Prime Minister. So its basically scotland does tend to make itself the belle of the ball a little bit, kind of like, oh impresses. Okay. Well lets stick with the telegraph now. Rishi is rishi bending the rules for lord frost . Rishi well no. Rishi insists lord frost could stand for tories in a general election. It was claimed he couldnt, but now he can. I mean , id say its a non story, but people seem to think thats a Lewis Schaffer catchphrase, as if he invented that term. But anyway. So even if he didnt, he popularised it. I think he was. People were saying it. Were they for a long while, people had a story that really didnt have a lot of detail in it. People didnt go, oh, its like an empty story. People know this story was known. Hell be crushed. Hope hes not watching, hes, so even if they had a plan to stop lord frost standing, they wouldnt do now because theyve run out of so many mps. So by the time weve finished this bit, itll be up to 85. Yeah. They would take anyone, anyone. Theyd asked that guy back with the offer of like what . Tractor . So we can look at the porn again. That neil that guy l the porn again. That neil that guy i dont i think they should bnng guy i dont i think they should bring him back. Who hasnt anyway, nick, what do you make of this . Well, ive actually asked david myself, trying to get an exclusive, but he said, ill tell you when ive got a minute. So hopefully by the weekly sceptic on tuesday. But i didnt manage to get the exclusive. But because he did it, hes not surprised that its confusing because it was one point. It was like hes barred. And then i read sunak saying, no, of course hes not barred. Thats ludicrous. So hes going hes thinking of dropping out that law. He would drop out of being a lord just so he could run. But he claimed in the telegraph, so and this is out there, he said, im grateful to the Prime Minister for clarifying. He said i wasnt clear whether i could apply to stand for the commons at this election, but hes saying its very late in the process. Time is short, but ill now consider the options. So what you might assume from this is that they maybe didnt want him. They werent thrilled about him. They werent thrilled about him standing. Maybe the conspiracy would be, but why not . Is it because hes too right wing if you read well, yeah, hes a natcon. Hes associated with the natcon side of the party. If we. Theres one thing this conservative party hates is conservatives. And theres another thing they hate. Its bofis another thing they hate. Its boris johnson. If theres another thing they hate, its winning. And hes associated with all three of those. So of course they dont want frost. Thats my theory. But, if you read that piece in the telegraph a while ago, people like aman bogle, whos a contributor to gb news and people like david campbell, bannerman, said they effectively banned him from standing. So there are ways they make it difficult, subtle ways. So it sounds a bit to me like like its been that. I mean, why wouldnt they make it clear to him . Yes we definitely want you to stand, you know, why would they leave it to the last minute and make it difficult . Thats so weird, steve. Cant we go back to the good old days when labour stood for the working class rather than the middle class . You know, because its called labour and the conservatives were conservative. That would be great. Just so that we have the choice. Id like them both to do that, but sadly the system is edged itself into again, its all about the parties get so close because otherwise if youre an outlier, youd never win. So they all compete for the same ground. They have very the same policies. Maybe if everyone just did what it said on the tin, maybe if the liberal democrats were, you know, liberal and democratic again, you know, i believe in sort of just if the greens were green. Well, rather than going on about gender all the time, maybe talk about the planet again. Well, theres other things theyve been going on about recently. Green peace be upon him i believe is a phrase okay. Were gonna this is true. Were gonna this is true. Were gonna this is true. Were going to move on to the daily mail now. And a protest in north london. Nick, whats this . North london. Nick, whats this . Well, its pro palestine and pro palestine. I said pro palestine. I said pro palestine twice. Ive gone pro palestine twice. Ive gone absolutely mad. Pro israel. Whats the other one is . Well, i dont i dont work. Youre not up on this conflict, are you . I dont work with josh on us. I didnt know what the other one was called. So its pro israel and pro palestine crowds clash outside historic north london cinema. Hours after venue was daubedin cinema. Hours after venue was daubed in red paint for showing film about hamas october 7th atrocity. So its the old phoenix in east finchley, one of the oldest cinemas in london, built in 1910, opened 1912 and its thought to be the oldest cinema in continuous use. So thats its claim to fame. But thats its claim to fame. But now its a place where people fight about foreign conflicts outside. So because they showed outside. So because they showed this film, the supernova, the Music Festival massacre that was thought to be terrible, its thought to be terrible, its thought to be part of artwashing , which is this phrase. Does that mean weve had sportswashing . Now its artwashing. You do art to try and promote a cause, a political. Can you explain this to me though . Because so the pro the pro Palestine Protesters were saying, if you show this film, its basically trying to cover up all of the atrocities that they claim are israel is committing. Why cant you show a film about the massacre, the genocidal, maniacal pogrom that took place on october the 7th . Without that being seen as, washing over Something Else . Whats it got to do with that . Yeah, you should be able to. I think youre speaking to the. We werent on that protest. Well did i say it in a tone that i wasnt accusing you . Steve, i wasnt accusing you . Steve, i was just i was just to wind up josh. But explain to me and also josh. But explain to me and also these people who are protesting, if they dont want to watch the film, they dont have to buy a ticket to the film. Definitely. Ticket to the film. Definitely. Thats thats a strong argument that theyre way past. I think. Also, while ever there are hostages not released, stop moaning about films. Theres a perspective there, isnt there . Like, oh, theres someone showing a film you disagree with. Hostages need to be released, get some perspective. They they said they were going there for a vigil, but clearly turned up with some red paint to do some daubing. Yes. I dont take paint on a vigil. I guess theres many questions in there. Can i just say the one thing that did make me feel a bit more cheered by the attitudes . Because there were protesters on both sides and there was some theres some friction. One man shouted to the pro Palestine Protesters, f word scumb, protecting rapist f word paedophiles, and then chanted the w word. And thats the one. I did think east london in it. Thats what you shout at people. London. Yes. Thats true. Theres something going on with peoples moral compass, isnt there . Nick insofaras. You know, ive seen people posting images, horrible images of the hostages who were either killed , raped, who were either killed, raped, who were either killed, raped, who were either killed, raped, who were still in captivity, hopefully not dead , and ive hopefully not dead, and ive seen left wing activists retweet it saying, yeah , well, they it saying, yeah, well, they shouldnt have been dancing so near to, palestine , should they . Near to, palestine, should they . They shouldnt have been so near to gaza. Its their fault, you know, real kind of a complete vacuum where your heart should be. And thats what im seeing, basically. Whats going on there. People have lost their humanity in service of ideology. We saw it on the day of october 7th, when rivkah brown said it was a day of celebration and ever since then, weve just seen more and more of that. And you could say weve seen it on both sides, but certainly weve definitely seen that in the on the rally. Yeah, but you say that. But i havent seen anyone celebrating or the death of innocent people in, in gaza. I havent seen that at all. No, i havent seen that as much. I meant perhaps some would argue the you know, weve seen it in the overzealous response of israel. Thats what they of israel. Thats what they would say. Right. But there isnt a moral equivalent here, is there . You know, i mean, were talking about an army that is trying its utmost to avoid civilian casualties versus a terrorist group that uses rape as a weapon and murder, and specifically targeted civilians. And if you cant see the difference between those two things, i think there is something wrong with your moral compass. Am i wrong . No. But i think if your moral compass is that faulty, of course you dont understand that a film should be shown. Yeah, and also this thing of daubing it with red paint. I mean, i just think they did the same to the shoah memorial in paris, which i think is clearly anti semitic. Its a clearly anti semitic. Its a clearly anti semitic thing to do. Anyway, were going to finish this section with the eye weekend and the International Court of justice clear instructions for israel from them. Yeah. Halt yeah. Halt uns Top Court Orders israel to halt rafah offensive, citing immense risk. So this icj is not convinced that the evacuation efforts for Palestinian Civilians will be sufficient to alleviate the risk. Israels not actually said what it says here. Theyve not said what they will do to keep the population safe dunng do to keep the population safe during the evacuation of the city or provide food, water or sanitation. Its important for context before we plough on as well. The icj has no way of enforcing this ruling. So its just words , right . But israel just words, right . But israel responded with anger, and its finance minister said that demanding that they stop the war is demanding the end of israel. There not demanding that you stop the war permanently. This is a whole until the details are coming in. Theyve also said the Opposition Leader said, that theres a moral collapse, moral disaster for failing to link the halting of the fighting with the freeing of the hostages. Yes. I think whenever the discussion is had, the first thing that needs to be put out there so it cant be brought up later is of course, the hostages should be freed immediately. But again, when israel has the right to defend itself, it doesnt mean you can do absolutely anything. And if the only thing thats being asked for right now is details about how youre protecting the civilians. Yes, this war doesnt have to stop this war doesnt have to stop this offensive doesnt have to. Nick, what do you make of the argument that, you know, if they dont go into rafah and eliminate hamas, then this will, you know, theyll effectively giving a green light for hamas to repeat what happened on october the 7th. Yeah. Well, that is the argument now. Its either a total eradication of hamas or nothing. And the problem with nothing. And the problem with that is, although i can see that side of it along the way, you alienate more and more of the international community, which is im just trying to say that dispassionately. Thats just whats happening with the rafah invasion. So thats thats the dangen invasion. So thats thats the danger, thats the risk of what netanyahus doing. And im quite dispassionate because people are obviously highly emotional on both sides about this issue. But im kind of not. So im just trying to be very rational about it. Yeah. Nick, the sensible, rational one. Thats me. Thats me. Thats me. Thats you in a nutshell. Okay, were at the halfway point. Do join us in part three for a row over literature. The police being shown up by a granny and a debate about razor blades in prison. Dont go welcome back to headliners. Its your first look at saturdays newspapers. Were going to begin this section with news that some italian kids are getting out of doing their homework. That cant be fair, can it, nick . Yeah, well, this is one way its backlash as Muslim Children in italy are exempted from studying dante. So the problem comes because he refers to mohammed and alis cousin ali being in hell. He said, how is mohammed mangled . Before me . Mohammed mangled . Before me . Walks ali, weeping from the chin, his face cleft to the forelock. So the thing is, the muslims dont want to read this. Now. You could make an argument that they could just read it as literature or just without agreeing with it. You know, jesus isnt treated that well at times in the bible. We can still read it, which doesnt mean we are endorsing what happens. Yes, in my book they could read it, but well, it is literature. Not in their book, of course they should read the foundational book, foundational poetry of the italian culture. You would think so. But but no. And its similar to the Michaela School controversy about the prayers in this country. Should controversy about the prayers in this country. Should muslims be exempted from the rules about not following any religion in that school . The secular rules, they have very similar. That school . The secular rules, they have very similar. One they have very similar. One thing i really noted, though, was that in italy things are a little bit different to the latin in this country because the Centre Left Party action, which means action, and i didnt pronounce it well , talked about pronounce it well, talked about this. They said this is not tolerance nor integration. It is the suicide of the west. Can you imagine the centre left in this country talking like that . So theyve everyone, all sides in italy have been vehemently against this, saying, of course you should study dante. I mean, you should study dante. I mean, they really like dante there, but well, as they should. But i mean, this is the point, is that if you if you start saying that we should exempt certain individuals from studying important classic works of literature, where does that end . Youll have jewish students end . Youll have jewish students saying they wont study merchant of venice. Youll have as they said at michaelis school. As Katharine Birbalsingh pointed out, youll have jehovahs witnesses saying, because theyve complained, saying they dont want to study macbeth because of the witches and they dont support the occult. You know, actually, youve got to just get over, you know, this is why i think maybe secularism in schools is kind of important. What do you think . Oh, this is the kind of story that really bothers me, because its an example of people thinking they deserve extra rights because theyre religious. Yes. Yes. I mean, firstly, its fiction as well. This is not like an act. You dont even have to look at an actual thing. Youre reading a thought that someone wrote down and made up. Then again, religions are kind of based on fiction, so thats a weak point that ive got there. Oh blimey, i youre going to wind nick up right now steve. I thought that atheist talking points was about 1960. Whatever this exactly the same. Yeah, yeah i think i dont have thoughts from 1960. I wasnt around, but these are the ones that i have now. No, its the same argument that people had about banning the life of brian. You dont have special youre not precious because someones offended your religion. And yet the people who were saying you shouldnt ban the life of brian should also be saying, just read this book. And also dante. You know, dante puts dante , puts his mates into hell, dante, puts his mates into hell, the ones that annoyed him in his lifetime. He gets back at them lifetime. He gets back at them by putting them in hell, being tortured in all sorts of ways. Tortured in all sorts of ways. You know, theres always mates with Mohammad Zahedi saying, no, no, im not saying that. And also actually anyone whos non christian is in hell, even some of the great, figures from pagan antiquity are in hell. Pagan antiquity are in hell. Because you mean in the poem. Because you mean in the poem. In the poem, theyre in the. You get people like homer and aristotle and cicero in the first circle of hell, which is like the best, the nicest bit of hell, because although they are really good people, they were unfortunately born before christ, so they couldnt have been baptised. So they have to been baptised. So they have to be in hell. So it cant be the argument to win the argument, though, do you know . I mean, its like. But dont worry, he puts other people in hell too. No, you should be reading it because you shouldnt stop reading it just because it mentions your religion counter. Steves, yes. A horrific sort of anti christian sentiment. I personally dont believe we should be secular. I believe england and britain are christian countries, so its okay. The head of the king is the head of the church of england. Its okay to be christian and in muslim countries its okay to promote those values. I dont think anything should have to be secular. Thats my im just saying you dont get special rights for it, though you do in this country. Christianity should have special rights because a Christian Country it should have. And in saudi arabia, islam should have special. Yeah okay. But by that logic, should we be able to say, well, christians should be able to object to important literary texts on the bafis important literary texts on the basis of their faith. Yes and not study them. Well, that makes you a philistine. Yes. No it doesnt. It makes me want a theocracy. It makes me want a theocracy. You want a theocracy . You want a theocracy . You want a theocracy . Well, at least you admit it. Were going to move on now to the guardian next. This is about a literary event. One of your favourite topics. Yeah. Hay festival. I thought it was festival. I thought it was a festival. I thought it was a festival about farming. I was wrong about that. I thought its when they put the straw in the bales. Hay festival drops main sponsor after boycott over israel and fossil fuel links. Yes, the Singer Charlotte Church and the comedian nish kumar are. Now i see why ive been given this story. If you expect any inside goss. If there was a mash report Whatsapp Group , i was report Whatsapp Group, i was never asked to join it. Yes. So the executive has said above all else, we must preserve the freedom of our stages and spaces for open debate and discussion where audiences can hear a range of perspectives. And we will do this by banning these sponsors. This by banning these sponsors. I mean, why is it that, you know, if authors say, i dont approve of the sponsor, the corporate sponsor of this particular event, why dont the organisers say, okay, well then just dont appear at the event. Well get another author. Theres loads of them. Like, why do we care what Charlotte Church thinks . Its madness. I mean, they say this is preserving the freedom of our stages and spaces, like freedom, as you say, by cancelling things absolute insane orwellian nonsense. But also, i dont know loads about this particular sponson loads about this particular sponsor, but i look and go, Charlotte Church kumar, george monbiot. So i just go, its all the worst people. So i just think the opposite. I mean, its a simple heuristic. A simple heuristic. George turned up, though he didnt boycott it. Well, this is oh, but hes but hes still saying some mental things. This is to do with the environment. Of course, this is this is, whats it called, a Baillie Gifford . Yeah. This so it is to do with the environment. Theyre worried about that. But they also link in palestine. And one of the spokespeople said they believe that that solidarity with palestine and Climate Justice are inextricably linked because its the omnicorps, you know, this phrase thats being used basically , they all run by used basically, they all run by a set of rules. If we support that, we have to support that. Youve got to love megan. Hence Greta Thunberg doing your thing. But watermelon. But if monbiot was a signatory to the fsb statement, thats what it was. But yet he still turned. Hes still planning to turn up, but so the Baillie Gifford have actually said only 2 of the clients money are invested in companies with some links to fossil fuels. And compared to the average, the market average of 11. And the spokesperson said our clients set the parameters to determine what to exclude or divest, which actually means if you want this company to no longer invest its money in the causes you dont like, you should let them advertise or promote themselves at a place where therell be loads of people who are like minded, like , i dont know, a literary, a literary festival. Okay. All right, well, lets move on now to the times. And the word frumpy hasnt been heard in a while, so im glad its back in the news. Yeah, calling a woman frumpy could be sex harassment judge rules, not sexual harassment. Its sex harassment, which is just based on your sex, i guess. And this is the. It was a Deputy Director at greenland investment management. Someone called huanhuan zhang, who claimed that, anyway, she was wearing these trousers. And the companys deputy personnel director said that she looked like a frumpy grandmother or aunfie like a frumpy grandmother or auntie. Theres a slight auntie. Theres a slight translation issue with the whole thing. No one quite knows exactly what was said, but it wasnt great. Its not very professional. Its not very professional. Its not very professional. Its not very professional. Its rude. Its not something you say. But of course, its also , as you guys were both also, as you guys were both saying to me in the break, you know, the problem is women in the workplace , as we werent the workplace, as we werent saying that, nick, we were actually saying even more controversial things than that. But what i would say about this, you know, is that, you know, people talk about its a free speech issue, and this is definitely not a free speech issue, because you sign a contract saying youre going to behave a certain way in the workplace, and that means you dont come into work and say, look at you, youre fat frump. Yeah. I look at you, youre fat frump. Yeah. I mean, the point that theyre making about the translation means we dont know if it was frumpy grandmother or frumpy aunt, as if that would make it okay. Oh, im a frumpy aunt, sorry. I didnt realise you meant. Maybe that is different. Yeah. Its not. Is it . Then its not ageist. At least frumps the problem. And yeah, i dont think you should call people frumpy grandmas, but out of politeness , i dont out of politeness, i dont necessarily think you should. It should become a legal issue. No should become a legal issue. No no no no. Yeah. Weve also seen the workplace. You should be able to go off and call people frumps. Yeah. However much you like. Right but in the workplace, youve kind of agreed to impolite, only legal issue or just an agreement. Weve not seen the trousers, though. We cannot judge on this. We havent seen the trousers. Youre right, nick, it shouldnt be a legal issue. It should be something thats settled within the company. Surely. I would have thought anyway. Whereas thought anyway. Whereas harassment sounds like a crime. That would be not just an hr issue , i see. Could you say the issue, i see. Could you say the article also lists other things that judges have or havent said are an issue . Its not racist, right . At the end of the story. Its not racist to say to japanese staff members, i like sushl japanese staff members, i like sushi. According to one judge, it depends on the accent. Yeah, that was a recent story. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Were going to move on now to this story about a granny steve, a vigilante granny. My favourite type of story, a bit like supergran. Do you remember that . Yeah, but not a frumpy granny. You cant say that these days. She was pretty frumpy. Mine the. How very. Dare you. Ill wring your neck. Grandmother reprimanded by police after shouting at gate vandals. So teenagers broke jillian mays garden gate twice. 500 quids garden gate twice. 500 quids worth of repairs on this. Blimey, she said, if i get my hands on him, ill wring their neck. And the Police Rushed round to stop her. So the police went after the granny . Yeah, for saying ill wring your neck to the people trashing her, the teenagers trashing her gate. Shes 70. Disabled husband went out there to stop them. He fell oven out there to stop them. He fell over. They mocked and laughed at him. When she went round to pick him. When she went round to pick him up and by the way, you know, if youre a teenager and a disabled man and a 70 year old grandmother can wring your neck, you lost that fight fair and square. If your neck is so fragile that a granny can wring it, you had it coming, nick. The phrase ill wring your neck is very, very common. Ive used it to children at school as a teacher, right . It doesnt mean youre actually going to do it. If this grandmother was actually planning on murdering these teenagers, she wouldnt declare the method. So specifically. The method. So specifically. Its a great point, and a phrase i use a lot is in danger of becoming overused is anarcho tyranny. This is another example. Its a rather quaint engush example. Its a rather quaint english example, but it is an example of that. Its punishing the innocent and siding with the criminal. And this is the philosophy now that we live under, philosophy now that we live under , its insane. Under, its insane. Go on. Can i just say they damaged the gate twice. They damaged the gate twice. They have asked for three of the fences to be taken into consideration. Very funny, very funny. Its old school, but im sticking with it. Well done sticking with it. Well done steve, were going to move on now. That is it for part three. But look, do come back because in the final section were going to be looking at the controversial re enactment costumes , a strange way to own costumes, a strange way to own your trumpet and a beer youve never heard of. See soon. Welcome back to headliners. Its your final section and your first look at saturdays newspapers. Were going to start this section with the news that nicks weekend has been ruined. Nicks weekend has been ruined. Steve, whats this World War Two event bosses defend reenactor dressed as nazis. That is even. I think thats harsh about nick. But dressing up. Dressing up as the ss hitler youth concentration camp guards. This is in nottinghamshire. My old stomping ground. And it was. They had people on both sides. There were good people on both sides. If you are re enacting a war, though, i suppose you do have to re enact the other side. Otherwise people would turn up and think why did this take so many years . Yes, no ones even fighting on the other side. They had a swastika flag. A professor said, an expert in holocaust history said it seemed a bit celebratory. Im presuming they didnt win at the end. I didnt see this particular re enactment, but i guess theyre staying at least that true to it. He also questioned the logic of people who want to spend time dressed up as a nazi. As a hobby. Yeah, battle re enactment people are weird. We get this. But you need the context. You do because its a battle re enactment and you dressed up like there would be nazis in the first captain america film. Should we ban that now . No, because , you know, the now . No, because, you know, the context would be whitewashing the war if you just took the nazis out. I mean, you know, itd be like, well, what was the problem then . It would be google gemini eyeing the backslider. This isnt nick. This isnt like, you know, prince harry, dressing up as a nazi with a swastika for a fancy dress party or Something Like that. Was it a fancy dress party or Something Like that . Anyway yeah, he had some story about that as well, though that was slightly redeeming, but i cant. Oh was it. Oh was it. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. But im just im just saying that that caused a big stir. Yeah. Yeah. But he wasnt. But if its a battle re enactment, its a bit like if youre in a film about the nazis, dont you have to wear the nazi . I know people, those people in america love it, dont they . They do. The us civil war. They love doing that. I mean, the professor is complaining. Hes saying theyre wearing the swastikas in a way that seems a bit celebratory. And hes questioning the logic of people who spend money to dress up as a nazi, as a hobby. I think if its part of a re enactment, you can do it. If you start to develop policies about fixing the roads and stuff like that. Yes, that for me is when youve gone too far. Yeah. Just because ive been to a lower low party and i dressed up as i didnt dress up, there were nazis there, but i dressed up as a and they were actual nazis and they were actual nazis. They didnt even know it was fancy dressed. You dressed up as the fallen madonna with a big no, no, no, i didnt. I dressed as, was it mimi . The little. No way. No way. Thats more offensive, isnt it . Is it me . No, i didnt, i was a renee. Renee. Anyway were getting off topic. Lets move on to the metro. Now. Apparently, people brag about being stressed. I know i do, and apparently thats why people dont like me. Because its stress. Bragging at work has a major downside , work has a major downside, right . And one of the downsides is youre seen as less competent and less likeable. So its good to know. But yeah, if you. I didnt give you this deliberately, nick. People say things, but you look, if youre because i have talked about being stressed, i mean, and this is saying why you shouldnt, but whats really complicated about it . All that complicated . Youre seen as more competent if youre seen as stressed. So the problem is not being stressed, but the bragging is the problem. Yeah, i believe so. Ive got to stop bragging. Well, i think a lot of people say self pity is the most unattractive quality. And i think thats probably apart from having two heads or something. Yeah. Well i imagine two heads and theyre both moaning about how stressed. Oh yeah, thatd be. Thats the thing. The whole article really overthinks it really. Its because if you moan about how stressed you are, you are annoying and thats it, youve got it. I mean, you know, youre tuning up because all i hearis youre tuning up because all i hear is me, me, me , youre hear is me, me, me, youre stressed out. Man up. Dont be stoic. Dont people lack empathy . I mean, if you what if you are really stressed . I mean, do you not think that other people might be stressed as well . This is when people say a problem shared, shared is a problem shared, shared is a problem halved for you. But the person whos listening to you went from no problems to half a problem for some. Do you think Marcus Aurelius went around saying, oh, ive had such a rough day. No, he got on with it. Im not stressed anymore. People have been trying to cancel me. Ive had all sorts going on. Im totally chill. Im im at one with the flow of the universe. Me too. Nick me too. Okay, lets move on to the guardian now, and whats this about arab headdresses . We are very emotional , headdresses . We are very emotional, keffiyeh makers. Bittersweet reaction to surge in demand. Keffiyeh. I watched a video on youtube about how to say it. The video was called how say it. The video was called how to pronounce keffiyeh brackets correctly. I love that. Is that correctly. I love that. Is that the shawl thing . Its the. Its the shawl thing . Its the. Its the Yasser Arafat headdress, right . And everyone will know it from that reference. But i love the fact that the video is called how to pronounce it brackets correctly, as if anyone is going to search for the how to pronounce it incorrectly. You can do that on your own. You dont need a video for it, theres bella hadid woman. Theres been a an increase in popular culture, i guess, and therefore an increase in sales. Well, everyones wearing them. Greta thunbergs wearing one isnt. But isnt wasnt this isnt. But isnt wasnt this isnt this Cultural Appropriation . Well, thats right down at the bottom of the article. The person making them said he receives loads of emails asking is it Cultural Appropriation . And he says, no, appropriation . And he says, no, we draw a distinction. You draw a distinction when youre making some money about selling. Actually, i think it was designed by an old white english guy, wasnt it . Most things are. You mean youre asking a guy if it was, if it was Cultural Appropriation who just played a didgeridoo . Yeah, but i find as an aborigine, he played it very well, though, as someone with aborigine roots. I found it incredibly offensive. Incredibly offensive. Oh, really . Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, lets lets move on to this story now. And this is a controversial drink. Nick. Yeah. Pub that created osama yeah. Pub that created osama bin lager has i give a big Norm Macdonald esque pause there for you to, osama bin lager has a new beer, and its their most controversial yet. So its a rural lincolnshire village pub. Good old lincolnshire somewhere some of my family are from. They had a kim jong ale. Pretty good. Thats good. Hootin porter , a thats good. Hootin porter, a bit generic. And now the new one, which is really bad is the orange mussolini, which apparently is a cheeky nod. I dont why im talking like Alan Partridge towards donald trump. Its terrible orange mussolini. Its terrible orange mussolini. Its rubbish. Doesnt work. It doesnt make sense. Total fake news. They want to be controversial, immigrants. Controversial, immigrants. Stout. That would have been controversial. Oh, thats good. Oh, thats good. Yeah, that would have been very outrageous. Thats what they wanted. They wanted controversial beers. I think osama bin lager does work, doesnt it . Yeah, because its just its good because it sounds quite like. And also he wouldnt have drunk the lager, you know, he would have been against that on religious grounds. So it works on a number of ways anyway. Look, i think weve had enough of that look. Thats all weve of that look. Thats all weve got time for anyway. So lets have a look at the front covers again before we finish on saturday. So youve got the daily mail who are running with reeves. Ill never play fast and loose with your money, the telegraph has got inheritance tax against tory values, says hunt. The guardian is leading with un Top Court Orders israel to halt assault on rafah. The times is leading with gove quits politics as more tories stand down the express now gove quits ministers shock exit rocks tories , tories very dramatic. Tories, tories very dramatic. The daily star. Weve beaten the curse of stories with snoring, with didgeridoos. That is all weve got time for. Thank you to my guest, steve allen and nick dixon. Were back tomorrow at 11 00 with some other people. And if youre watching at 5 am, please do stay tuned because right now its time for breakfast. That warm feeling inside from boxt boilers sponsors of weather on gb news. Good evening. Welcome to your latest gb news weather update this weekend. Its going to be a bit of a mixed bank holiday. The driest weather expected on saturday for most of us. Well turn a bit more unsettled as the weekend goes on, but through this evening the pressure pattern really settles down and that will set us up for a much dner that will set us up for a much drier and colder night to come. Tonight there are areas of cloud and rain weve seen across Northern Areas will slowly drift northwards through the next few hours, and these clearer skies across the south will become more widespread, pushing into parts of southern scotland by the morning. Theres a chance of some mist and fog across some southern counties, and its going to be a fresh start. As i say, temperatures could be down as low as three, 3 or 4 degrees across parts of wales, southern areas of england, as well, but it will warm up fairly quickly as the sun will shine. First as the sun will shine. First thing we could see some sunshine first thing across the north east of scotland, where were sheltered from that more southerly wind, thicker cloud though further south and west still some drizzly rain. But i still some drizzly rain. But i think things will improve through the day here. Elsewhere across much of england and wales it will be a dry and bright start, but some mist and fog may allowed some drizzly rain. Nofice allowed some drizzly rain. Notice though, we do have this area of quite persistent rain moving into the south and east thats moving in from parts of europe, and that could bring some very heavy rain to eastern areas, potentially. So a bit of areas, potentially. So a bit of areas, potentially. So a bit of a wet day is on the cards for eastern areas of england. Just some areas actually, most of us should stay dry through the day on saturday and its going to feel much warmer than it has done today. Highs of around 22 degrees in the south, closer to 19 degrees across the north. But under the cloud its going to be a bit of a disappointing day. Things turn much more unsettled on sunday. Bands of showery rain will push north and eastwards through the day. Some more persistent rain for Northern Areas. Heavy, possibly thundery downpours across many central and southern areas and that could bring some localised disruption , perhaps some disruption, perhaps some flooding and spray on the roads. And it will likely stay unsettled into the half term week. Week. A brighter outlook with boxt solar sponsors of weather on link to you at 6 00 on saturday the 25th of may today. Tory grandees michael gove and Andrea Leadsom stand down as mps at the next election, as rishi sunak is set to spend the weekend locked in meetings and the chancellor, jeremy hunt, claims inheritance tax goes against tory values and promises to put tax breaks for the middle classes at the heart of the tory manifesto. Russia says its ready to ceasefire in ukraine if the west recognises the current