♪ [applause] >> greg: happy wednesday, everyone. [laughter] >> greg: yes, control yourselves. remember back in grade school when the teacher would leave the room and tell everyone to behave while she was gone, of course, the second she left the room went wild. that's how i got my first tattoo. i would show you but the fcc doesn't allow frontal nudity, so it's great what the teacher got, right? but remember how after a while it would get ugly. the bullying and fights would start. things would get tossed around the room. by things, i mean me. when the teacher came back you were sort of relieved. you knew your class needed a grown-up to keep things from chaos which brings us to america. can someone please call the teacher back into the room? not so they can sleep with their students, although that helps. but to save us from the madness. every weekend we're seeing the same stories of violent mobs disrupting and destroying our cities. it makes me remember the good ole days when it used to be safe to poop in the streets. meanwhile our colleges are handing out extra credit for intimidating and assaulting jewish students and shoplifting has become as lucrative for up skilled people as guest hosting the daily show. our media and government are churning this chaos like they are in the audience of "the view" and bay heart just threw them sardines. is anyone actually running this place or is it all by design because nothing goes wrong this perfectly. let's take atlanta. last week two blm rioters were allowed to take a plea deal for burning down a wendy's restaurant. talk about flame broiling. the two sarsists, king and white, each received a $500 fine and probation. that's right. no jail time for first-degree arson. i'll remember that the next time i go through a drive through and they forget my ketchup but i guess that's why they call it hot atlanta. or they used to. i don't remember. the arson occurred after a black man suspected of a dwi got into a scuffle with police. the man got a hold of one of the tasers, fired twice and that's when the officers shot and killed him. amid the ongoing protests afterwards someone shot and killed an 8-year-old black girl near the sight a few weeks later. this was in 2020 during the summer of love when rioters engaged in mostly peaceful protests that did $2 billion. it used to do that kind of love you had to change your safe word to harder. how do these two fire bugs get a deal so sweet, it should have come with a shot of insulin? here's fanny willis, atlanta chief prosecutor. she's doing such great job on crime down there that atlanta's buckhead region which accounts for 40% of the city's tax revenue is actually trying to cede. having to bail the two arsonists out. after the wendy's became a smoking ruin, it became another occupied zone. just like chaz, autonomous zone in seattle where protestors took over the area around seattle's east precinct, after six shootings in a little over the week chaz was finally cleared out. and just like the area around george floyd square, the intersection renamed after floyd's deft. that worked out great, too. last month store owners in the square sued the city of minneapolis claiming the area has become a hub for violent crime and police wouldn't even respond anymore. strange how powerful those three letters are, blm. they seem to instantly put prosecutors to sleep faster than a rum coke from bill cosby. in fact, one major study found that the vast majority of charges against blm protestors in the summer of 2020 were ultimately dropped or dismissed. and, of course, massive fraud by blm itself has never been investigated. so wait a minute. if nobody is holding anyone to account for all of this, what is our criminal justice system actually doing? there is fanny down in atlanta who is keeping busy with her 13-count ricoh on donald trump which has to be the most bogus case since prince harry claimed he had balls. that was unnecessary. oh, and there is always the most persecuted jan since e-plum. our feds can't go to that well often enough. apparently 1,200 have been charged even from stepping on the capital steps. nearly three years after the fact the feds just picked him up. charged with misdemeanors including trespassing, disorderly conduct and parading in a capital building. parading, three years of investigation for that countless man-hours for this guy. why die get the feeling his main failing is being a trump supporter on social media. congressman mike collins who represents an area near atlanta put it this way. i'm sure a lot of j-6 trespassers would love to pay $500 and go home. if only they had burned down a building. maybe. i know. got to biggest laugh. i heard that guy. we need writers. so while the feds and progressive prosecutors obsess on trump, january 6 and the ongoing plague of pronounce misuse jewish students on campus still feel unsafe and we know that not because of any prosecution or arrests, but because of republican-led hearings on capitol hill. meanwhile with the weekend coming up the current crop of anti-israel rioters made up of antifa and blm rebrands will shut down traffic and commit random about of violence and vandalism and there will be no consequences. is it me or does it look like the teacher won't be back in the room until 2024, that's only if he's not locked into the faculty room by administrators. [applause] let's welcome tonight's guests, he's harry and his impressions are scary. actor and standard comedian tyler fisher. [applause] he's done more triggering than an epileptic at a shooting range. she's like a pop-tart, a sugary treat that can fit in the toaster. "new york times" best-selling author and fox news contributor, kat trimf. former weight children tyrel tirous. i get the sense that our country is in a moral quandary. we're like in this new world where the rules we used to live by no longer exists. it makes me think of the great philosopher jordan peterson. i wonder what he would have to say about this. >> well, you know, probably start crying, get a little emotional. well, i think he might have sympathy for the guy that burned down that wendy's know, because it's like, well, if you hang out at wendy's, maybe $500 is a lot of money to you, it's like maybe that's 335 junior cheeseburgers, you know, and maybe if he cleaned his damn room, got his life together, then he wouldn't pick up a match. you know. it's like, well, you know, that's about all i have to say about that greg. >> greg: what does tyler think? >> i think that, yes, i mean, look, it's a double standard. you know, double cheese burger, double standard. and i think $500 is a lot of money for somebody who is broke. when i was a new actor and new comedian, that would have killed me so i say make them work the drive through for a year at 2:00 in the morning, he'll never do it again. >> greg: that's true. >> curt, you're a lawyer, you claim to be lawyer, i'm pretty sure you are a lawyer, right? >> sort of. >> greg: do you think there is a double standard here? >> i know there is a double standard. people are continually asking me, greg, what is your legal opinion about all of these things and i don't have a legal opinion about it because it has nothing to do with law. it's the exact opposite of law. when i go to contract on a regular basis, you know, so and so ran over so and so, you present facts, you have law, a judge makes a ruling. it's all normal, and then i see this insanity. this lunacy, where $500 for burning down a wendy's. look, maybe that's on target. it's a wendy's. if it was a jack in the box it would give him money and if it was an in and out he would have to be hunted for sport. but no. there is a complete double standard. i mean, there is some granny off somewhere that's doing hard time on a chain gang. $500 for my dad's trust fund. let's go. >> greg: it's an outrage, kat. have we become a country that now has political prisoners because that's what it feels like? we have people in jail because they were on the wrong side of an election. >> kat: i have never understood these kind of comparisons between, you know, setting a building on fire versus january 6 because going intereo a build is lot difficulty than setting it on fire and the capitol is a lot different than wanted's but looking at it individually, right? the wendy's $500 fine for setting it on fire, actually back in 2020 that was a fine could you face for bracing lockdown rules. covid lockdown rules would be $500. going out with your friends or having a restaurant that's opened should be treated differently than burning one but also i have talked a lot on this show and elsewhere about, you know, overincarceration of nonviolent crimes and i would be a total hypocrite to talk about all of that january 6 was bad, bad decision to go into the building for sure but to say an appropriate response, what you're being charged with, the highest thing is, what, disorderly conduct in the capitol, to be picked up by fbi agents at the airport and taken to jail, that's obviously a punishment and being treated in a way that does not fit a handful of misdemeanors. >> greg: it doesn't fit at all, tyus. it took them three years to nab this guy. what were they doing? they had people devoted to finding this guy. >> yes, greg, it does fit. it fits perfectly. what we're seeing in this country is we have two court systems, and how it works was, it used to be rich and poor. like if you had money for a real expensive lawyer, you get a couple of lawyers. now all you have to do is your crime has to fit the narrative of who the d.a. is, so if you're a left-leaning criminal, you don't [ bleep ] in alabama. you do it in towns where you know the a.d., the attorney general or district attorney are left leaning because, they are not going to hurt the cause because it used to be when you got arrested and went to jail it was a deterrent not just for you but for everybody else, and they are saying they just burnt down a wendy's, no, it cost about 45 people their jobs, property damage in the millions, who is responsible? if i hit a baseball and broke the win doe i would pay for the window but as long as it's in the purview of whoever is in power and we saw that in the george floyd trial if it's a left-leaning judge he's going to protect the narrative instead of the people so we'll seeing a change in law and your point was a hundred percent. it wasn't law. it was there on the right side, so that d.a. will give them a $500 fine but you know what they did? they just inspired the next group. so if i'm sitting there with a cocktail in my hand and i go to lie and my friend goes, don't do that. why? >> they are going to pay my $500 for me. they are saying as long as you're in line with blm and these left leaning, in the 60s it was on the left, as long as you're in line, you're good and that's the part that's scary. >> greg: that is scary. all right. [applause] >> greg: we shall move on. is joe only stay hi, i'm kevin, and i've lost 152 pounds on golo. i had just left a checkup with my doctor, and i'd weighed in at 345 pounds. my doctor prescribed a weight loss drug, but as soon as i stopped taking the drug, i gained all the weight back and then some. that's when i decided to give golo a try. taking the release supplement, i noticed a change within the first week, and each month the weight just kept coming off. with golo, you can keep the weight off. why do i do this work? it's just so inspiring to do research that impacts human lives. stand up to cancer has been a critical partner in advancing research for cancer. so please help us fight in this battle against cancer. [applause] >> greg: thank you. thank you. biden says farewell to sanity while trump chills with hannity. during a fundraiser in boston president biden admitted he may not have sought re-election if trump wasn't in the race. said joe, "if trump wasn't running, i'm not sure i would be running." joe, for the sake of your hip i'm not sure you should even be walking. forget the campaign. joe barely has the strength to run a fever but after those wise words the president concluded with thank you, chicago and he said he hoped the dolphins would win this year's stanley cup. in iowa trump was trump and by that i mean his usual hilarious self. unlike biden he was hilarious because of what he said, not because he kept shaking hands with casper the friendly ghost. when it comes to biden lasting until the election i wonder if trump personally thinks he makes it. >> i personally don't think he makes it. i think he's in bad shape physically. remember when he said i would like to take him behind the barn. if he took me behind the barn and i went like this, i believe he would fall over. i believe he would fall over. who knows, who knows. >> greg: i'm surprised there is no headlines that read trump wants to blow biden behind a barn. [applause] terrible. sick people. but did he ever watch him at the beach? >> i watched him at the beach. he wasn't able to lift a beach chair which is meant for children to lift and mentally i would say he's possibly equally as bad and maybe worse. >> greg: trump also touched on the indictments he's facing, once again likening himself toal capone but was he one of the greatest of all time. >> al capone, he was one of the greatest of all time if you like criminals. scar face, they called him, and he got indicted once. i got indicted four times. >> greg: classic trump. you know the famous gangster of all time? you got one? i got four. then there is this moment when trump was asked about the media painting him as a dictator. >> under no circumstances, you're promising america tonight, you would never abuse power as retribution against anybody? >> except for day one. >> sean: except for day one >> meaning? >> i want to close the board and drill. drill. drill. >> sean: that's not retribution. >> i love this guy. he says you're not going to be a dictator, are you, no, no, no, other than day one. we're closing the border and drilling, drilling, and drilling, after that i'm not take at a time for. >> sean: it sounds like you're going back to the policies when you were the president. [applause] >> greg: of course it wouldn't be trump if he didn't say something to make heads spin like a barn owl on met but mark my words the media will interpret him -- speaking of wetting themselves, anything to add, joe? >> you heard him. he's a dictator. day one, dictator. he's going to close the border. i opened the border. i did that on day one. good guys open things. dictators close things. everybody knows that. i like opening things. windows, refrigerators, car doors. can't open jars, though. they are too tight. i have jill do it for me. she's tough. jill, she got her doctorate in kung fu gripology. it's a true story. that's not a joke. [applause] >> curt, how do you see this going forward over the year? just listening to trump, when you get a dose you can't help but laugh. >> look, if i was an insurance underwriter i would be very depressed about biden. he's old. a dinosaur old. an old pervert who was stupid to begin with and now he'ssen nile and that's kind of going easy on him. he's a terrible person in every way, and this stuff about trump being a dictator, it would be terrible if trump went out, i don't know, persecuted his enemies that would be awful. trump would launch an attack on democracy. i'm not -- look, i'm from california so i don't understand democracy because we have gavin newsom. i'm just worried that, you know, joe biden is going to wander off chasing an imaginary squirrel and be replaced with gavin newsom and he's going to run on the slogan i'm going to make america just like california, and have a hobo in every pot. >> greg: yes. i hate hobos. tyus? i'm a hope bo sexual. i'm a hobo phobic and hobo sexual. >> you were right the first time. >> we literally have a guy on the show every other week with glasses. >> i thought you were talking about me. >> a medium little guy. listen, this is a brilliant scheme by biden, which, for me to say that hurts my face but he's saying i have to run to stop trump. so he's creating the monster, even though i'm old, i'm tired, i'm senile, i have to, to save this country and all the surrogates are out there. s hitler 2.5 and he's going to accuse them of all the things ironically that they do. i'm not debating a dictator. i'm not debating trump. he's a criminal. he's not going to be in the basement. he'll be in the sun room. we'll be able to look at him through the window, no, not doing it because look who he is. i don't know who came up with it. they must have is hired an angry republican, but this is their plan, and this is how he's going to lay it out so there will be no debate because he can't debate president trump. what? he would have to arrest trump for abuse if they had a debate which they might do and he won't have to go around the country. because he has to stay and protect the white house. trump can show up any time and try to take it on his watch so he's got to be there so this is -- this is their plan. this is what we'll see. you'll see gaffe newsom on the trail. kamala on the trail. he'll be at the white house guarding it to make sure none of trump and his mignons and maggot try to get back in. it's scary enough. what scares me is it might work. >> greg: kat, he says we can't let him win. is that the bat signal to tell everybody that everything is on the table. >> kat: the funniest thing that trump said by far, everyone is talking about, kennedy, is the dumbest guy in the senate and he said it was joe biden but the funniest part to me is he said who is the smartest part and the guy gave me a name but i don't want to share it because i don't like the guy at all. [laughter] >> kat: because every guy in the senate now, who is around during that time is like, was it me? was i the smart guy? did kennedy think i was the smartest guy? they probably all think it was them. but that's one of the moments where it's so clear that trump has this background in reality tv because that's exactly the kind of thing you would see a producer plant on a bravo show before they all get drunk. >> greg: we don't deserve him. >> kat: he gave me a name but i'm not going to tell you because i don't like the guy. >> greg: tyler, how do you think trump felt after this? do you think he was proud at how it went? >> he's getting funnier by the day. love him or hate him, give him a netflix schedule. it's getting hard to make fun of him or jokes because he's getting funnier. >> greg: i want you to do one now though. >> frankly, just a tease, a little tease, but just, a little tease, day one tease, a little tease, but this is the first time in history, i'm not sure our candidates are going to make it to the election. one of them could be in jail and one of them could be dead, you know. biden could be assassinated by the stairs at this point. you know what i mean? and if trump goes to jail he'll still run from jail. he'll make it sound cool, we're going to jail. nobody was gone as quick as me, two days. el choppo couldn't do it. al capone couldn't do it. the zodiac killer, it took him eight days. i did it in two days. he'll have to do a little shackle hand. >> greg: very good. all right. up next, the squad kayaking is my thing. running is awesome. but her moderate to severe eczema would make her skin so uncomfortable. i was always so itchy especially when i was hot. now my skin doesn't itch as much. now we're staying ahead of her eczema. there's a power inside all of us to live our passion. and dupixent works on the inside to help heal your skin from within. it helps block a key source of inflammation inside the body that can cause eczema. so, they can have clearer skin and less itch. serious allergic reactions can occur that can be severe. tell your doctor about new or worsening eye problems such as eye pain or vision changes including blurred vision, joint aches and pain, or a parasitic infection. don't change or stop asthma medicines without talking to your doctor. healing from within is a wonderful thing. ask your child's eczema specialist how dupixent can help heal their skin from within. >> a simple together in one place. the greatest segment in cable television. trends tuesday. but it identify as a wednesday. [applause] >> greg: that's why i wore the sweater. outspoken swimmer riley gains. joins the call defending female athletes with balls. women's sports advocate and forger collegiate swimmer is making waves. see how i did that? making waves, after her recent congressional testimony irritated house democrats who preferred dissenting women to shut their traps while celebrating women who wear jock straps. the so-called party women sure doesn't like women who won't do what they are told. specifically far left squad member who tried to have riley's comments struck from the record. >> it implies a much-needed discussion, we're likely going to be forced to listen to transphobic bigotry. >> if my testimony makes me transphobic then i believe your opening monologue makes you misogynous. thank you. >> i move to have her words taken down. >> she's engaging in personalities. >> i just asked how it's fair to be called transphobic. >> i would say men disguising themselves as women are engaging in personality. >> letters get a ruling. >> i move to withdraw the point of order. [grumblings] >> greg: it was withdrawn. what you're smelling is a roasted squad member. gaines used her own tactics against her like when i told my own doctor to take off his pants. if riley keeps bringing that heat leah thomas will end up with toasted nuts. also during the hearing, aoc spoke with progressive gender activist, jumping to the insane conclusion that all women will face general exams if men aren't allowed in women's sports. listen to this. >> we're talking about opening up all women and girls to genital examinations when they are under age. >> that's right. >> potentially just because someone can point to someone and say, i don't think you're a girl? >> that's correct. >> greg: all this gender confusion is surprising to hear it from aoc. wasn't she a bartender once? and did she have to ask for genital exams when she was pouring drinks for ladies night? what an idiot. you don't need genital expectations, just have everybody line up and write their namestnikov in the snow. that's who my coach did. meanwhile, job of yen genital examiners has been flooded with resumes from fans of women's sports. tyus, as a father of young women, what is your take on the hearings? >> you know, okay, i feel like if this was a horse, please stop beating it. we keep going in circles and we keep having these arguments and no one's opinion changes. i hate to break it to aoc but they already do that it's called a physical. you have to get one before you participate in sports. all of us parent know that we always forget the due date and we have to run our little babies around to get their physical on time, okay? the boys have to cough and the boys don't. it's just stupidity, okay? in my book, enough said. in one of my chapters i talk about boys need to be with boys. here's the deal. if you're a biological male and you decide to compete in women's sports, that really is the most massagistic thing a man could possibly do. i'll just leave it at that. it's bad that people are arguing this stuff that don't like competitive sports. like the squad members don't care about sports. they don't participate in sports. they are virtue signaling. if you're an equity hire competition is the last thing you want, so understand where that stuff is coming from but the transcommunities don't want to be part of this. they just want to player their sports. riley gaines has made the same speech over and over again we don't need to hear it anymore. they just need to protect title 9 and move on. it's distraction for all of us. they keep -- she comes up. they insult her. try to get five-minute talking bits for msnbc and christian christian, she was smarter than they were on this day so they are going to bring her back again and keep bringing her until they get something. the american people, we're tired of this. we don't need to watch this anymore. >> greg: i'm not tired of it, tyus, because i got a segment out of it. kat, what i don't get is the same people that are arguing against riley gaines were arguing for safe spaces for women just like maybe a couple of years ago. >> kat: there is no such thing as a safe space. but what aoc was saying was actually a weird provision that was removed more than a year ago in ohio saying you need internal and external exams if somebody questions your gender. my gender has been questioned in the past wind not want to have to show my vagina every time that happened, there are a lot of easier ways to do. this for me, look, the venn diagram of transphone and people who are concerned about biological men competing in women's sports, it's not a issuing isle. there are a lot of scientific reasons based on what male puberty does to your body and research that doesn't automatically make your a transphobic if you have those concerns. if we keep like hurling insults, while never solve it. i don't think they want us to solve this, you don't want to solve this because you wouldn't have any more segments but they also would have fewer tv opportunities themselves if they cut out this lobbying and insulting matches. >> greg: i think it's a serious issue tyler and it's a perfect timing to promote your new film "lady baller." >> i can't believe that. >> greg: how does it relate to this topic? >> riley is in the movie. awesome, person, human, but it was pretty surreal to see her competing against a man in the movie. so the movie is essentially about a bunch of low life guys who dress up as women and we start dominating male sports and it's not an anti-transmovie. it's just a bunch of guys who are taking advantage of these new rules. >> greg: right. >> so we win a lot of money. i start playing t ball because i'm small, you know, the only thing we can compete in is jockey -- jockey sports, right? >> greg: that's true. and horses don't like me because i made that film in tijuana in the 1970s. >> it's a great flick. great flick. >> greg: you don't even know what it's about. >> don't ask. >> but it's a fun movie to just kind of poke fun at what's going on. it's not about trans. this is a movie adam sandler would have made 10 years ago. >> greg: then you can do a sequel where you guys go to prison and identify as women and ge to a women's prison. >> as genital examinees. >> greg: why have they advocated their role defending women? >> i have no idea. if women just said we're not going to do this anymore, this would all stop. and there is something i would like to bring up for aoc because she seems really concerned about these yen genital examinations. it's something called a birth certificate. in the little corner it says mof and in the last five years you might find a question mark but traditionally these would eliminate the necessity of the dreaded genital exam, which frankly. >> dana: - when you're ready to begin treatment for chronic lymphocytic leukemia, calquence helps you do the fighting. and you can do the exploring. you can do the splashing... ...the sightseeing... ...and the playing. calquence is an oral targeted therapy for cll. more patients begin with calquence than any treatment of its kind, and calquence is proven to work better than chemoimmunotherapy in patients with previously untreated cll. calquence may cause serious side effects, which may lead to death. these include serious infections with fever, chills, or flu-like symptoms; and bleeding problems that may increase with blood thinners. decreased blood counts are common and can be severe. new cancers have happened, including skin cancers. heart rhythm problems with fast or irregular heartbeat, dizziness, feeling faint, chest discomfort, or shortness of breath, have happened. tell your doctor if you have bleeding, heart rhythm, or liver problems; infection, or if you are or plan to be pregnant or breastfeeding. calquence helps you do the fighting. and you can focus on the things you're loving. ask your doctor if calquence is right for you. ♪ [cheers and applause] >> greg: yes. greg's romance corner. so our homes in robock are do you for some paybock. they had a famous affair -- good morning american anchors, holmes and rowbock are reportedly dating. you may recall abc canned both of them last year after their off the air relationship became a public scandal. now they are in romantic relationship of their own. apparently they bonded over the traumatic experience and found a real connection. this might be the biggest plot twist since we found out brian kilmeade was neither a fox nor had friends. [laughter] >> greg: kat, i mean, wow! their common ground is that they hate the same people. is that strong enough to keep they will together, to bind themselves based on hate? >> kat: yes. could be. because i think there is still more they could do with it. if they started a podcast i would listen to it. so then it was like they got fired. they lost their jobs in broadcasting, whatever, media, and now they have the jobs in media. i feel like there is a lot further they can take the revenge. it's definitely based on a shared hate, though, and i wonder if the original couple are upset about it. >> greg: yes. but it's all done to tweak them, basically. >> kat: i think it's great. >> greg: you love infested kids, tyler, what would jordan peterson have to say about this? >> well, let me meshed all my impressions. it's so great. we're building a wall, you know. >> i mean, i'm just mostly mad that the tall guy is taking tiny woman because she's in my bracket. and i'm single right now so any time anyone is in a relationship and you're single, i'm so angry. i see people holding hand down the street and i want to karate chop them and push them aside. i did just meet somebody, greg, and i want to announce there is a super model in my neighborhood who i've been seeing for about four weeks, and she hasn't seen me yet. so, i'm down here. let them have love, you know. >> greg: can revenge romance work? >> absolutely. and i know because i married a cuban. look, first of all, i want to get this out there. i would like to give my heartfelt congratulations to this group of people whom i was not aware of before today. i don't know who they are, i don't care who they are, i just look at, this is what happens when you get a marriage counselor referral from gavin newsom. >> greg: do you think this is a real relationship or orchestrated? >> spite love only goes so far. both of them were cheated on so that means whenever the other one answers the phone, who are you talking to? where are you going? >> do you love me? >> i think so the paranoia won't stop because each one of them is doing this to get back at the one who hurt them, which means they are only a phone call away. back in the day, many, many, many, many, many years ago before i was married i might have dated, we know i dated two or three people at the same time because again i have three 12-year-olds. but what's really funny is i had six and i got caught. they will come back. three will try to fix me. so, you know, they are not sweating that. the only thing they are probably looking at is who is getting more likes. i feel like, you know, we retired our podcast but i would be willing, we produced this reality tv show. >> kat: i agree, yes. >> we do interviews and stuff. this is great reality tv. >> kat: sponsored by tyus -- you. >> throw in a couple of teen moms. >> dump truck money. >> kat: these four and then a smattering of team moms from around the country. >> greg: in the final episode they go on a double dealt. >> chaperoning. you're going to do the questions at the end of the season. >> greg: exactly. i'll be that guy on bravo. what's his name? >> anderson cooper. >> greg: no, andy something. cohen. that's coming in my ear. the producer (sfx: crowd noise. ref whistle) sarah, you got this. ok? (sfx: referee whistle) ♪ say, what you wanna say ♪ ♪ and let the words fall out ♪ ♪ honestly, ♪ ♪ i wanna see you be brave ♪ ♪ with what you wanna say♪ ♪ and let the words fall out ♪ ♪ and let the words fall out ♪ but they lost ♪ and let the words fall out ♪ not really. ♪ what you wanna say ♪ not where it counts. ♪ i wanna see you be brave ♪ ♪ just wanna see you be brave ♪ [birds chirping] [female narrating poetry] and just like that, she starts to grin a special flame's been lit within the spark of something new begins there's something in the water. on her own, she's in the zone determination can't be thrown resilience building in her bones there's something in the water. with her gaiter on and her waders on she can tackle anything till dawn [shhh]. [whispering] there must be something in the water. on and off the boat she flies the sky's the limit she's soaring high she's a force of nature on the rise there's something in the water. [fast paced music] [music fades out] >> a story in five words [applause] ♪ >> greg: americans aren't adults until 30? kat, a new survey found one in four americans don't feel like adults until they are nearly 30. did you feel that way? >> kat: no. i felt like an adult way sooner, but that's because i had to deal with a lot of adult things that weren't necessarily funny. i left home pretty young. also my mom died when i was pretty young so i was not doing that much swinging on the swing. >> greg: that's an honest answer. she's right, that's not funny. tyler, we're living longer so it makes sense. adulthood might come later. >> tiny men live longer. we have less cells in our body. the heart is close to everything. >> greg: exactly. >> like one pump of blood. >> the downside is you're easier to kill. >> that's true, that's why i'm sitting over here. >> greg: but if we fall and hit our head it's a short distance to the ground so the contusions aren't concussions. >> better for the environment. i don't know, politicians, media, are treating adults like children and children like adults. during the pandemic, you want a cheese burger, you've got to get your booster shot and a 12-year-old is like i want to cut off my genitals. take the car, do your thing. i've got you. it's all reversed. >> greg: are we dealing with arrested development, curt? >> just look around you, okay? look at these people. i'm surprised it's only 25% of people saying, i don't feel like i'm an adult until i'm 30. i would be happy with 75%. i grew up on the mean streets of san may tao. >> dana: grew up hard and early. >> me, too. >> but, you know, all i can say is this just proves i'm right about my deep desire to raise the voting age to 48. >> greg: i would support that tyus, has social media pulled people down into adolescent brain function because everybody is worried about what other people think? >> that's a really complicated question, greg. we only have two minutes left so we won't go there. listen, this is bulldozer parents. you let little johnny live at home until he's 29. you are filling out his job applications for him. at 30 -- i'm an adult now. no, like i said, i was raised by the sea turtle method, once i was out, good luck. i can't relate at all. this is more about parenting, letting their kid stay home longer so there is less time to be an adult. the average is 29 before they leave home which is really scary because i told my kids it was 14. >> greg: yes. >> sea turtle. >> greg: all right. don't go away. we'll be right back. believe it or not baby... you could earn your... master's... for under 11 thousand! master's degree for under 11k in less than a year. earn your competency - based master's at university of phoenix. >> we are out of time. saturday 2023, i am jon scott, thanks for watching. ♪