And thought he had to hide his illness fearing its revelation could cost him everything his career his position is germanys 1st choice goalkeeper but hiding the illness was not a long term solution. Nov 10th 2009 and had committed suicide because germany teammates found out why they were having dinner together when they were among these what was suddenly everyone in the room was nervous. Showed us his phone and said somethings happened. With you know what i told them the news you could sense this really Strange Energy and nobody knew how to respond because i was through these. Robot nko was afraid of revealing his illness a fear that had fateful consequences around germany and the whole world many people who suffer from depression. Also suffer from the fact they condition is often not recognized as an illness. Depression is a mental disorder that affects the brain it involves changes to particular of my or chemical processes for intent for 25 years professor florian holds bush who was president of the Max Planck Institute for psychiatry in munich where he researched chemical interactions in the brain he treated germany and blew his legal star sebastien dyes lawyer for depression holes bo is among the campaigners who call for depression to be recognized as a malfunction of the body not dismissed as emotional distress. We also have to recognize that depression is not a weakness of character or something that can be overcome by pulling yourself together. This is and its a disease just like pneumonia or a slipped disc. Like many people suffering from depression but ankle is only ill in phases in the periods in between those who suffer from depression can be in good health and highly motivated. To lisbon in february 2002 i was a Sports Reporter for a german newspapers in spain at the time and portugal to some point i heard there was a young talented goalkeeper from germany that. Benefit. And hes goalkeeping coach about a young hans had noticed after hed had an impressive season at mimicking glad that. I went there on regular reporter duty and we spent a very nice day together he was one of those people you get along with right away. Then 25 was glad to have a friend in a foreign country the 2 men communicated frequently over the years to come primarily fire text message. And what Ronald Reagan didnt know was that i had been suffering from panic attacks as soon as hed arrived in portugal. As asked and that was the 1st time when i really noticed somethings wrong. But. I went to see them and told me he had to get out of there immediately it was panic and escape us. It would be several weeks until ankle returned to lisbon but he then managed to settle down and had a happy 3 years at benfica. His goalkeeping feats make him a hero of the club. Meanwhile fixed rituals helped to make him feel that seeds. That i dont want to allow more that in my heart would always poop on the one tree that robert would say that made him feel good to me because he knew you could. Try to always use the same tree to hide in mine it seems crazy to me but he said it gave an insecurity inconsistency that may so they stand and that is what his life was like so was i he was always wary of anything new. It was a younger troubled goalkeeper in lisbon he was actually very happy with his wife and their 7 dogs it looked like he was captain of. But at the same time hear that constant pressure a professional athlete feels to reach a higher level sport. The next level fangirl was boss a lot of the club he joined in 2002. He was recommended by gilles seymour to be used to be able brits coach up and fico it was july 2nd 2002 hed been there just a couple of weeks we were sitting outside in the sun at a cafe and he told me he wanted to stay at barcelona for a long time he was really happy but all that changed in a matter of weeks when he realised he was. 1st pick for barcelonas coach louise from the one that was for. Me. Here in the office of his former agent. And because barcelona jersey takes pride of place. The 1st big setback was him coming to barcelona and then the young Victor Valdes was suddenly playing he was on nobodys radar. When the downward spiral began when he apparently entered a really deep clinical depression with. Robert anker blamed himself for not making the number one goal the sport his own already having a predisposition for depression he now suffered an acute outbreak of the illness. As a professional footballer youre obviously in the public spotlight and you have to accept that with a predisposition youre more likely to suffer this kind of depression and so he puts on. A spanish cup game against 3rd division of elder looks like an opportunity to stake his claim but the underdogs pulled off an unlikely 32. 00 victory the shock defeat was not the reason for increased the question but it was the trigger for the illness becoming a cute. As. It was a Decisive Game even before he left he told me terry with this match i can only. Digs his own grave read one newspaper headline from to poor publicly handed responsibility for the defeat to anchor whose condition subsequently went from bad to far worse what an awful place god is sometimes he wouldnt get out in the morning and that he put the blinds down close the door and not come out how problems getting dressed. He couldnt get out of bed he couldnt move due to anxiety and his depression because youre. Asked him to help me understand how he felt and he said that its horrible and magic being in a tunnel and theres a light in the distance but then i live on. And you want to go there but its so dark and you just hope that this little late doesnt go out and others plan to list initial hours a Foundation Set up an anchors name has created a Virtual Reality project that incorporates anchors experiences participants a weighted vest and a 360 degree video visor to get an idea of the symptoms suffered by people with depression. Among the scenarios is a football dressing room based on anchors own personal accounts of his condition. Problems its a hear about. Kind. Often marshawn comic wish bush kind of guy saw an experience. I thought. This mission. The physical. People who watch and listen to it might become more sensitive towards those the fact. That i am gay and they aim is to give people a feeling of what its like. How it might be to have to pressure the current is what it is only an inkling of what it actually feels like. Realizing he had no real future at barcelona because next port of call was istanbul on loan to fenerbahce. But he wasnt prepared for the job at hand with the fanatical stadium atmosphere after just one match he fled is that all hoping to begin therapy. But it took weeks for him to find a psychiatry just in cologne so his desperate search would be easier over the last decade the robot and foundation has set up a network of Health Hotlines for athletes across germany. The man thats. Actually weve come a really long way. That makes me happy personally. Because we didnt have that back then. At the networks with all the phone numbers of people talking about the illness. And with so many sports psychiatrist involved. In 2004 anchor got a new start at 10 a reef after getting treatment for his depression he was healthy and happy. There were newspaper articles including a higher broadly about him supposedly being at rock bottom i visited him into really never seen him so. We sat by the hard. And watch the dock workers im hof he was a reserve goalkeeper return to refund the 2nd legal and he enjoyed going to training with group if he was just happy to be a healthy again. At the end of the season and who was recruited by evolved lean and have a back in germany also on the team was a young power. Who was at the beginning of his career. When he joined i had the feeling he already knew me inside and out of your pair and you did this and that that made such an impression on me someone who came from abroad and knew so much about a young player who had just started out. As a soccer saw no sign of any predisposition for depression on the contrary. He came across as totally selfconfident and you could sense it in every Training Session that he wanted to get more out of himself and his teammates were the males i. Think you can say that having come through this illness in 2003 made him a much stronger person and a much stronger goalkeeper. Robert spent 5 years in good Health Living in noise stepped outside how to. Get there with his wife and a whole lot of street dogs that picked up in spain and portugal. Wonderful dog food what a surprise. There was always fun to be had we formed a bond and just enjoyed life and football by experience the complete spectrum of a fun loving person by the information i lived i mean its an illness one that can be treated and that you can come back from as robbie often demonstrated and then hed be himself again. The general public later belief that anchors slide back into clinical depression had been caused by the death of his daughter lara from a heart defect but he emerged from the tragedy in good health. Larose death didnt make him he was stable. Until then he might not have understood how important life. But then he became aware of it and it was. Robert encouraging a Training Session 4 months after the loss. One can. Just spend all day grieving and was sitting in a corner and saying theres no future life has to go on i have a responsibility towards myself and my wife and the fun. Of holding. The anchors spent their beloved daughters 3rd birthday at her grave. We tried to stay optimistic that we stood there dressed in colorful clothes and basically celebrated our daughter. Last. 6 months after lauras passing robert made his debut for germany. Just or im very proud of my 1st car but its a shame we feel to get at least a draw for me but of course im glad about my 1st International Car for you with us the national. And International Team he found himself playing with his old friend metz a sector again. Strong. Team would meet up the 1st thing we do was call and see whether the other one was already there it was great but. By now the big question in the germany team was who would succeed against lehmann in goal and already after. That i thought it was a by the kind neither of us was interested in rubbishing the other guys in the media need to know there was this general rule of the game this battle to be german goalie i go but we always got on really well this company thought i was wasnt i weve got the number one was a favorite chance among the hanover fans but anka suffered for a time from the tabloids stating their preference for the younger rennie adler but in the end and himself the jersey germanys goalkeeping coach andy cook picked him for the upcoming world cup in 2010. At the beginning of 2009 and corrupt his wife a poet. For your birthday what would you like a diamond huge and pure cats horses dogs i know thats going too far. One self how all things continue on our journey through life together. Its very moving to read this now it still really moves me to this day. And. Im not worried today is here tomorrow is just around the corner only one thing is for certain i need you now and i love you. Important i cant believe how positive that was that he was fine and was thinking about the future. When i read this i cant believe that he killed himself half a year later. The illness was just lying in wait you cant say when itll come for you. In the summer of 2009 his bill this resurfaced. That was a very difficult time we had to play a cat and mouse game with the media because it was terrified that hed never again be able to do the thing he loved the most play football with. The National Team trained without him on the advice of his therapist thank you for again keeping a diary. Ask September September 1st 2009 i lay in bed half the day until terry phoned me and told me i had to get up. That september 3rd 2000 and i didnt sleep everything seemed so pointless im finding it difficult to concentrate and thinking about ending my life. Instead of speaking about his problem anchor told people he was suffering from a virus under no circumstance would he go public with his depression. We said he had some virus that wasnt yet recognized it was a huge burden on him for. His therapy sessions with his psychiatrys think being conducted via telephone. When the maktab i noticed that one point he never mentioned how he really felt. He had pretend and make jokes that in then one time i listened. How closely should i watch over him and how much freedom do i allow him so that he can still be an individual and still have a little room to breathe so he doesnt feel completely at someone elses mercy. For. The antidepressants he was taking werent having the same effect they were 6 years previously. The meds werent working anymore so it was time to try therapy so i told his club little robot has a psychological illness and is now undergoing treatment in the house as we drove home from the clinic a couple of days before he died he said im not doing this i couldnt believe it. Because i was just about to call you and inform him but corbett was so afraid he stopped me. But i think the clinic would have saved him he is. An anchor wanted to keep up the facade and he was soon back in goal for an hour. A game in cologne following 2 months out. In retrospect forced hospitalization would have been the right thing to do well never know if would still be with us today if wed done that but it might have given him a chance. On the sunday evening against hamburg and played his final match. He embraced National Team a pure try to kosky 2 days later his friend 20 ring called him. I called his hole only theresa was in and i talked to her for a long time she was in a good mood because she felt will be was on the road to recovery he was laughing again today we know why he was thinking i know how to get rid of the disease for good ill be dead soon. But. When a sick person decides to put an end to his suffering the decision by itself can bring a sense of liberation because he knows the suffering will soon be over. At half past noon i called or he was in his car and he was insanely stressed he said to me ill call you back this evening now i know why he was stressed because he was on his way to kill himself. Decision to hide his condition would prove to be fatal. Even after i was what we were bonded so close together we thought our love could conquer anything. But it doesnt always work like that. It still has a hold over me for. Him to the minute i saw it as my duty to protect this young man. And i failed. As kava but now must not have his death there was no structure in ways no network or charity for athletes. That he was alone and his illness wasnt ever really addressed as it happens i understood why he couldnt just come out and say i have depression or. It wasnt like it is today after his tragic death i would always recommend for people to open up and seek help off. During the Funeral Service it was clear that depression was a to do subject. Story inspired other athletes to go public with their own suffering Marcus Miller was one such case. You dont want to just stand there in light of people. Who want to stop playing hard to see. Skiing star lindsey vonn spoke up about her depression. To make that worse the next one i had to take myself to open up and speak to people about these things. In 2018 danny rose an england Football International opened up about his battle with depression. He recovered to make the world cup squad. If someone in the public eye someone whos achieved so much someone so strong can be affected by this illness than someone like me just a regular joe can be affected too. And its no ones fault. But i think that plays such a vital role opening up and talking about your feelings can really make you feel normal again. And his story has also inspired friend and former teammate. Today he runs the Arsenal Youth Academy helping to mold a new generation of professional footballers he wants his players. To be honest and open when they experience problems. I know it isnt easy even so i try to be more open i remind the Young Players that we all have problems sometimes and they were allowed to share them and also. The. Mets a 2nd himself suffered from panic attacks and self doubt as reported by german newspaper desh beagle last year. According to the former defender the time has come for people to be more open with one another. When he has nothing to do with being weak its about working on things to make life easier and learning from our experiences and the thoughts one. Can because each of the message is clear its time for us to take depression seriously and to do Everything Possible to help people seek medical assistance. Today is living in hanover and happy again despite having once expected to grow old with robert. Was at his dream was to one day become the goalkeeping coach at benfica to live in. Their day and i think that had he managed to get through those issues he now be leading a happy and satisfied life. And then. He can no longer be by my side but he remains in my heart and that thought gives be strength. In my every day life memories of bluebird laughing come to mind how dylan credibly beautiful laugh you can ask other people who knew and worked with colberts laughter. Often comes to mind and thats still the case after 10 years is that the case of the memory is still strong still fresh or no model but the memories are just painful as they once were a visit with him as a. Live only one things for certain i need you of balfour and i love you forever. Clinton. Should. Be. Glad. To. Get. More. Women of i guess. We told you a lot of people i cant even tell you how many. My name is ayesha is my real name and i says they call me gaga. 10 women who actively supported i am as they were merciless terrorists but were they also victims. In 15 minutes on d w. Are those some of the 7 percent speech obama. Thanks. It wants to lift the nigerian dream up. To quadroon studios conspires fans from. Animation the future of nigerian sentiment. 90 minutes on d w. I subscribe to g. W. Books you mean your favorite writer didnt like to see myself as the kid style in the strange grown up world to the studio where you are new to. Not nothing out of the jet. Just sometimes out but most end up in winter that the german thinks even for german culture of looking at a stereotype aquatics it is think is most of the country that i not. Needed to be picked for this drama down to you thus its all about. Bob im a joker joins me from the agenda sunday w. Post. The worlds isnt calculable. Their egos consentual up their rivalry deadline. 3 princes. Dream of the arab world. Their power and boundless ambition have plunged the middle east into a crisis saddam was princes of the gold stocks november 27th on t. W. Odd. This is news live from Berlin Police and protesters clashed on the streets of hong kong officers to use tear gas and Water Cannons against the demonstrators earlier some of the protesters occupied and set up barricades at a University Campus well get the latest from our correspondent in hong kong also coming up. An ultimatum for the czech Prime Minister sell your biz
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