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I don't know where to turn with this one. Since hitting menopause three years ago, I've hardly had sex with my husband. I have a good marriage and I love him, but sex became painful to the point that we stopped having it altogether over 18 months ago. It has changed things between us, and I feel like I'm no longer the person I once was. He is being patient, but I don't know how long he can be patient for. I have no answers - do I resign myself to never having sex again?
Mary replies: It seems to me that menopause often has very negative connotations - we hear lots about hot flashes, thickening waistlines and painful sex. But this should not be the case. Instead, I feel it should be seen as something positive, and, in some ways, a new beginning. After all, there are no more painful periods, no more worrying about getting pregnant and usually, with a family reared, more time to devote to the woman herself and her partner, if she has one.

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