Is part of our brandname Virtual Event series pretty were so excited to continue the work of bringing authors in the ratings to our communities during these unprecedented times. Every week will be posting events here on our stage and just like always carbon schedule work appear on our website and you can sign up for email newsletter. It this coming monday joining us for our next event discussing his latest book submissively acquired. This event, will conclude with some time for your questions. If you would like ask the speaker something, go to the app are as the question button at the bottom of the screen weakens and that your questions. We will get through your questions. Also the bottom of the screen during this presentation it was a link to purchase a copy of i dont want to die poor. All sales are through this harvard book separated a huge thanks for your generosity. Your purchase and contributions make this new virtual possible and no more than ever, truly enjoy. Thank you for sending and credit and harvard bookstores virtual space. We sincerely enjoy your support now. Im so pleased to introduce tonight speakers. Michael arceneaux. Family race and other reasons that i put my faith and be on site. He is currently creatively and twitter rated previously he was working for near amazing rated his other writings have been published widely in the New York Times. Time magazine and numerous other publications. And we will be discussing his book i dont want to die poor brain and epic love to survive the roots, be specific and trauma of financial insecurity. In essence than are relatable. And they are sincere. To form a life among the most pervasive. But the 16 praises of the book observing that the arsonist, brilliance lines and how quietly events us to our own empathy forcing us to examine what it means to exist in a world that makes it increasingly difficult to predict were so delighted to host the event tonight. Without further ado. Alternate over to michael arceneaux. Members question, is you wrote a book that people loved and it was critically acclaimed New York Times bestseller and all of that stuff. What went on in your head lets try to do it again. Is that terrifying. Are you trying to meet expectations from original or and you had we already kind of write books plural. Michael if i would have had my way i wouldve written the book a lot sooner. I had a vision in my life and career. In a lot of ways, i wanted to be specific and literally earn but i knew how to early on how much that impacted my life. And this someone you know you work in a very clear about what the narrative is. And always compelled was something new. And about Student Loans. And i would still like to think that learning, youve gotten better the traditionally, i mean. I didnt know sincerely how even the book would go. I didnt know if i would get a big deal. But, i knew if i got this out and i get to write the book i wanted to, it would do well enough to where i can self this. And then i had another idea. We will see. I dont know anything in this economy. Benjamin this writing something about Student Loans is hard to you. You cant get too far away from it. Was impressive like writing about it by equal parts sugar and therapeutic or doesnt like, over me as someone who also has a number, and amount of Student Loans that is so large, it doesnt even, but you know. Its. Michael i have accepted in the something crazy happened in my life. Disability and pain until i am like 80 rated as one of the things. Like dealing with it headon. What was that process like. Having to think about that pretty youre already thinking that they just dont disappear but to write about it. Does that add to the stress. Or anxiety. Michael i dont, i would was content but i probably that i would just never really paid off until i was 80. I just didnt have an option. No, i just wont go play this print then and remove the option pretty so i had no choice but to really kind of face it. Generally dont type like talking about money or debt. Any kind of writing or admitting the problem, i knew everything that i needed to get into the book by the time i wrote it. Otherwise i would not have put it out there. I knew it would be more revealing than anything. Talking about money is personal. Especially if you dont grow up with it. Because frankly, to some extent in the book, a lot of things that were as in life, was an accident to become writing it created i show a lot more than i thought i would. So its a nightmare to write it and this is that it while knowing that you and in honest honestly, most of it right now, the fragility of it. How much is beyond your control. Or the fact that no matter how much you get just a little bit ahead, if you dont really have like financial base. Not only was that familiar in the book but its our jake but i guess but mostly it was a pain to get it done because i got an advance for the second book and i needed to get in the first book. I think it was super interesting to read. And i dont know if i fully impact myself is like the kind of connection between you know, the decision of night teens and early 20s and later. It is not a crazy that when you think about college and in being one of the Big Decisions of life. Itself romanticized version of it. Like where you go. That campus, determines a lot. But besides from the other part which is the financial thing that you a lot of times are 19 yearold is deciding. Not only unilaterally but you know like, you dont really know what you are getting yourself into especially if you come from a family where money is not a casual thing like theres not a flush fund. Is so interesting to read, and i think we will relate to a lot of people to pick this up. Michael i didnt grow up with a lot of money but my mom was like her folks, she was liking journalism. Theres no money in that. I didnt even know that i would do that i was the first one who to go to college. It was always presumptuous. I didnt realize it was a big deal. I didnt really go into it i knew you didnt make a mock lot of money at first. Media as we all traditionally put it, and then i also graduated when that happened in the Great Recession happened. So he virtually had the job. So in some ways, it didnt completely know but even when i was 17, irony. I did a lot. I didnt have blinders i guess i just didnt realize that so much of what i thought existed just was not going to be there anymore. And the fact that i was born in 1980, but regarding the reagan and trump and this is a locomotive tied together. In his missing with all of us who are all under 40. Nobody can on that. The shame as i felt like, i didnt want to let my mom down. And she literally did not think that. But as my own guilt. To the point of the larger part of the book, for things that are not fair. Literally, you kind of just you kind of going against the system. Im going to take a quick pause. If youre watching this, and on downpour. That is a true friendship. Theres a button at the bottom if you like. Thats what we are talking about. And i think also this is a very tidal very good title. Whoever did to recover, they did a fantastic job. Michael i love the cover. Benjamin i think is the Second Chapter in the book if you havent read it. I will try not to spoil it but i want to talk about points in the book is youre talking about reality tv. A world in which all of this became some on camera talent. Which is funny because there is actually, there was a reference in that chapter but there was a point when we were both almost on camera people. [laughter]. So moving on, that chapter did everyone because something that so many people have to deal with. It goes against everything you know. It is this idea of turning down the wrong money. If you dont, are you in a position where you dont have a lot of money, you know about these loans and just kind of float overhead and never disappear. And then opportunity shows up that even while youre at a point where any money, that idea of still saying no. Like a particular type of lunacy. An delusion in your own loan game that you built in her own had no idea that its actually going to pan out. Talk me through but that is like because it is something that i think about a lot predicting people take, what was obviously the wrong money but i was jealous of them but they also knew that they had about nine months to do the most with his money. We just kind of what you are talking about we talked about survey from real housewives of atlanta. Lets talk about that for moment because i think its a real poignant point. Michael i was going to do a lot of things that chapter and expected everyone who has read the book, i use cultural references. By realizing the need for references. In my case, and that year, i did it at that part of the book because that was distracted and i will talk about it later but i would you say that there were some things that happened to me professionally that was out of my control and was fortunate that kind of really should alter the trajectory of my career. So wasnt in a place of as gracious in particular. So i really did need money. But the thing was, i really truly believe, i will make sure that i will make good with it but i think it is important to, i have a larger purpose. I had nothing. If i thought that maybe it would be a means to an end, then i could get through it. But ultimately, like we reviewed that type of thing. It is the right in the book, they are literally on the whiteboard talking about me. And the television and it was like, theyre trying to explain to you about black homophobia. But also as i mentioned in the chapter, applied to me because of a black man to write it i saw the show on youtube. They were actually silly people into it. Black culture, tran culture rated theres other shows that not really. So, i think it is funny how they get money that we all created. And then you at the show. And there on youtube. And again, i think it is great but the fact that the gay black man, and these executive values. Advised me to predict not poor but my publisher dont value people like me the way that other industries dont value like me. So i was try to speak to the lines of that and recognize the fact that i just personally think it was worth it. Id one person that i probably shouldnt mention my name. Like she would not like that. It was worth it. They would like me. It just wasnt worth it. It was not worth it. Benjamin i will say that being and current of the criticism and occasionally taking a healthy painter approach to things they can be called out credit does provide a certain amount of checks and balances. When your life changes. Its like things pop up pretty lightweight, if i got this thing that i called courtney for five years, mike if i feel like im about to do that, thats pretty much my indicator to say no. Because i think coming up especially in the industry, you want to do it your way that you are blocking people little bit older than you pretty take checks and worth you are just a roth 27, that ical could you do that pretty and you become like 33 and you thinking but okay i get it. But i still cant do it. Michael you know that it would make me look bad. It wouldnt look crazy. I know in my heart. The thing about that is ill be different. You think youre special. We are all special but no one is special. As i think you but no. Benjamin so as someone who knows you and who is also a black man from the south that shares lots of cultural references, when youre writing a book, something that you hope could be consumed widely. There is a world in which you tone down some of the referenc references. And then theres a word that you not going to handhold basically like older white people who might not know like the people i am talking about. And it also kinda feels like when you are working with white editors in journalism and dont know what youre talking about. Like when you are writing this, whether moments that you are like, should i, am i to an trend getting to referential pride or you want to double down. Michael i literally never think about that. And theres nothing wrong with you think about it. I dont think its right or wrong but if you do thing that is fine. But my thought about that is i read a bunch of stuff from people of all types. I dont know theyre talking about. A google i figured out freighted its really not that hard. Im not going to like, i guess it comes with consequences but i look for references or previews. Im not going to go through the lens. I think ultimately i trust the reader. I dont mean to sound an think e very nice white people in their 70s. Many would say, i havent completely understand everything but i really at the heart of the story. They did what i do. They lifted up their like, i get it now. And that might have introduced them to something that probably wouldnt have thought about. No, i refuse to rated its not that i dont care about black people or white people. So often, they are going to center whiteness. We talk about the writing about blackness. Your writing about being black and white. And how white people react to me. Which is fine if thats what you want to write about but is not same. If you like it, you do freighted if you dont know. Benjamin but would you say was, going back and reading your own book. What would you say is the antidote or the story you enjoyed or rereading the most. Not necessarily like you enjoyed writing the most. Sometimes that is not real because its fresh. Soft and hard stuff. I said dont do it. [laughter]. Sorry, keep going. Benjamin like what is the story. Is there in this book that really sums up, while the whole thing is about new york is a one story here where you are like, i am going to open this book and show you one story here that i think is going to get you in this book. Like what is that. Michael so the book is actually, really kinda funny funny but if i guess i had a big something for somebody to read, i think the best to know me is the chapter t essay then a right to my mom. That was actually, i cried writing that. I was in a coffee shop in harlem. It was really hard to get out. I cried reading it in the audiobook. I didnt hate writing it. It was really painful. I think it kind of speaks to the core of who i am read like the anger, i think it reveals fundamentally what is like to come from this kind of chaos. And at the same time to have a heart and compassion. So probably that one. But otherwise, maybe less chapter. Benjamin ive been waiting for it. Finally. There is something in writing that you write, i feel like there is a lot of it that is kind of inspiring to me because i find myself when i think about books or essays or things that i want to write the field super personal, as an excuse to not do it, and run straight to the like how someone feels about like this when it comes out. And im thinking why did i run to the end before. Like as soon as an idea comes up at the top, i cant do that because soandso might be offended by it. And then i step away from it. In reading this, it is a reminder that just write it. Write it and then get it out first and then make that decision. Like writing about for you, how has the process been for writing. I dont want to write all of my personal stuff about my life after everyone is dead. I want to write stuff that people are alive and can see. And that is difficult rated and you are talking about people will then read it. Michael im always cognitive of the fact that that when you are writing your story, your also putting people story, so it is very important pete to be considerate. And not only how much of the other peoples story is included but whether or not you mean to even include sometimes that may be in the case, there was some things that i just think if something truly happen to somebody else, just think that maybe we got out. Maybe add to the book in other ways perhaps. Not perhaps, he would have prayed but was at the right thing to do freighted now. And is not in there. And that way. And that could be something different. But the momento was if i am talking about anybody, like family, it needs to be respectful. My parents are read my book but my auntie said to be honest was successful. I try to be honest and respectful but also because of the fact that i have stories about me that i can speak to about other things with other people. If the individual person, does not feel right to include for what other reason. Then dont. I think there are other ways to fill in the larger point. Benjamin and also i think for someone that feels like writing would be part of their life, for a long time. I think it is also, you dont have to force everything right then. By holding onto some stuff like maybe, very out the right time to tell that story. I feel like it is also helpful there is a link very i think awesome that you said at the end of the book. It really informs why the book exists outside of the financial things that come with writing a book. In writing a book being your job. You did your job. But this idea of learning to forgive yourself which is something you say that you would be on the last page but it is very interesting because of think about my life like my 30s are making up for the sands of my 20s in terms of like financial irresponsibility and those moments were the recession and you like do i go to this party pay my phone bill. So as those moments where you just like confronted with do i do that think that a need for my mental sanity or do i do the thing for my financial stability. And then not being always the most responsible decision and then you look in the future like well, i just like, done this or that, things would be different. But also just like learning to be like, thats what you needed to do and thats moments. Dont just features of doubt about that. In his a very really good amazing thing for someone to read because it is a chance whoever is reading that, has beaten themselves down about that. How did you get to that point. Even, do you find that you are practicing what you preach. Or is it still kind of hard to forgive yourself at times. Michael honestly, i generally, mention what i think. I meant it. Because i needed to believe otherwise. One thing, and he came to jesus. And hopefully like a lot of people pickup from that. Is about Holding People accountable. It is also being kinder to other people and also shows this book. I am forgiving myself for things that i really didnt need to. But even if there are things that you need to be forgiven for, and mistakes that i made but, we are also harder on ourselves for so many things that just dont need to be. And i think is more so, i decided that we are precious we are bound to eventually, but you know, im still going to email some people dont even kind like selfish saying. It is really your fault. It are blah blah blah. And i hit to get a major loan to go to columbia because im already going there and i thought i could not go there. It is not a compromise and became actually like the decision had to be made. Given that had access to a life that black people, only existed on tv ads. So if i had not done any of that. Tuition i had taken private loans or government routes or less attractive recruiter, and told me your before. Probably in virginia running far prayed for something. Even if you do not have liked, the darker path, so many people, all i wanted to do was to do better by my family and myself. And just like everybody else. Not just watch tv all of the time. You can do this and do that. So no, the bigger question is to me, not if i would go back because thats what people keep asking. When i go back in time and change it. No. Because i would not be here. I should not have had to do that. My niece shouldnt beginning back to be a doctor. Thats the bigger point. Hopefully this pandemic im really glad, they were able to meet together. People need to be less selfish. Ill stop now. Benjamin alike and i was about ready to play the organ right now. Mac i wanted to read a quote that i really appreciated it. I did my due diligence. I did underlining. I have a section of my own wishes to bookshelf of people on my friends in the box. Its a beautiful thing. In all of your books. I think, there is this quote not related to everything but its a very real kind of like truth and power moment that you can speak to brian its about from land. Feel like it hit differently in this moment that we are in right now. A lot of us into very heavier and moment of questioning what americans built off of which is like smoke and mirrors basically. So the court is, acute corporate term that translates into when going to work you is if you are a fulltime or but we dont want to pay you for your health insurance. So if you get sick, take robitussin or whatever does the poor people use treat yourself. That stuff like basically quote about america. Speedo what is happening to me and people like me, a lot of black people. Michael maybe people will change their minds now bhagat, is so interesting. Also thing people, the Great Recession, you cant control how you start. It impacts everything. So windows for the time for me to get offered a fulltime position, were not paying enough to pay off my private loans. And i was doing fulltime contract for print and sometimes they were doing the work and then, now, now i am budgeting. And even some folks that i known now today and one thing that i will say in the book because i have seen it on social media. More often than not, no matter how much you are making, youre probably being underpaid unless you are the person who is taking advantage of you. So instead of you like looking down, maybe some people looked at me because i freelance. Look at you now. You have to be considered that we are all in this. Benjamin before we go to questions. One thing i do want to say that if you are listening to, youre watching this, the two of us are two people that came up and entered a adulthood and what we thought was going to be, like the worst moment of our lifetimes, was a recession. [laughter]. With kind of where and as a badge of honor. Like being in recession can, is like a generation to itself. In the millennial world. What i will say youre watching this and you know somebody is a good College Senior give them this book. Because a lot of this debt that comes out of the book and a lot of the being forgiving to yourself theres going to be a lot of 20 and 21 yearolds who enter a very similar world that you talk about in this book there is a level of, there is no script. There is no one who can prepare you for what is about to happen. Be kind to yourself. As the process happens. They feel that comes through in this book. And i think, instead of trying to give advice to that 19 or 20 or 21 yearold in your life, tell them to pick this up. If there is something that you could tell to someone who is currently bummed out, not going to graduate art walk across that stage while trying to figure out the world. What would you tell them. Michael my nieces a senior i gave her the book when i was new orleans when i visited her in march. I literally have no idea what that means. I graduated in chaos but folks with loans i think, potentially some of them might be more forgiving than others. Particularly if you had federal loans. I know that you will be less forgiving. Realistically, actually what happened to me in the minimum month i only got a year, or 26 month deferments and thats it. I had to use those immediately. I didnt have any money. Thats unfortunate. If you have that option, thats what you can do. Thanks six to 12 months. And frankly, it just wasnt anything. It wish i had a magic wand. But if you dont have it, you cant give it. As a going to hurt you. Yes. Its going to make you feel bad. Yes. I go myself crazy. I harmed myself, not intentionally but in the stress, try not to give that credit to these loans and almost killed me. I will say this not worth it. Its a comforting but it seems to me where in the midst of some really difficult times. So in terms of credit. The worry about perfection but i get it. But if you cant deal with that right now, a lot cannot, just do the best you can to get through the day know that none of this is your fault. And do the best you can. It will be all right. Benjamin i think the one piece of advice i would give just in terms of my thinking about some of my mistakes is i think it is healthy to not think about the phone all the time but dont never pick up the phone. Because every now and then, that person on the line is not a bad person. Theyre just doing their job. Its been a couple of years being like i dont answer the phone, and i dont have to deal with it and then when i finally answer the phone because they like down to where i lived. Then they were like, now or at your house. Metaphorically. I think it is or was for a long time, important for me if i even started thinking about this the rest of my life is going to unravel. I had to do that but at the same time, at some point get to a place we can have that conversation is not going to be fun but its better than running. Running forever. 110 but had a couple of questions. And you both can hear me well. Great. So it looks like we have one question and then an observation. So for the first question, rick is wondering now that you have written about religion sexuality and death and religion do have other things in mind for your next book. And that is a followup lets note if you cover urban tempted by fiction. Michael before this, unfortunately i lost people posture so i kinda wanted to to talk about death and getting older. I was kind of likable. We will see how this goes. Fiction, yes. And one television but i am open to fiction. I have been thinking about stuff print my knees, my other nieces 11 and she wants me to write something she can read. So i think i will write something if i have time. Within the question. Benjamin that is it for and then for i think this is great. But we are running short on time. This one says amen. And i think that is, left feeling that really kind of sums up what were all feeling after this. If that is the last of the questions, feel free rated oh it looks like we have another one that has come in. Perfect. And then alyssa just want to say yes, if youre interested. Wheres the money at. [laughter]. Michael i have thought about it. [laughter]. Benjamin i think that is all of the questions we have time for right now. Are there any closing comments or discussion points from either of you. Michael thank you. Ive never been to boston. You have never been to boston. Wow. Michael thank you for asking questions. By the book. I really appreciate it. I am done. Inc. You. Benjamin i just want to say that i, is a beautiful world to see folks like michael go from blogging with no twitter or anything to amplify themselves to having a following to freelancing, having columns, in writing from places who do not pay him to having multiple clocks. Out in the world. I just think it is an awesome thing and you know, when i think about 18 yearolds, that there seems to be space for like one or two folks to talk about the world. And love the fact that theres a lot more space for a lot of People Like Us to tell stories. I am really happy and really thrilled this book is out rated i am proud of my friend. Michael that was a really nice evening. [laughter]. Thank you. We are together. In light of the pandemic, great, once 20 take this moment to thank our speakers and all of you for spending your evening with us. And supporting authors, and publishers in our incredible staff. Harvard bookstore writing thank you for your patience during summer technical faculty sprayed we sincerely appreciate your support now and always in place make sure to check out the link below. Im good to harvard bookstore. And its also important to read the contemporary writer rated thanks again, for your time, your purchases and your patience. Have a great night and everyone please try to do best to sing well. Thank you so much. Michael thank you everyone. It. Good night everyone. This week in a bikini, saturday, 7 20 p. M. Eastern, in his book, the splendid and the bio arc loss looks at Winston Churchills during the blitz. Talks about global politics. And the covid19 pandemic. The latest book is my heart. And on sunday, and 9 00 p. M. On afterwards, timmy founder joe ricketts talks about his book that are in your book, the luckier you get. Watch book tv, this weekend on cspan2. Seventynine on q a, journalist susanna discusses her book, the great pretender about a 1973 experience loved by a stanford psychologist testing the legitimate of psychiatric hospitals. He had such a wide influence on so much of the Mental Health crisis that we see today. As such in some ways by this guy and a lot of Public Opinion about psychiatry and about the institution spring they were in part shaped by the study so i think and questioning it, we have to go back and question some of our functions and i hope that this gives us an opportunity to go back and to reassess in a way to move forward. Because you cant
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