Document for the 1st story we listen to after the war saying you know europeans go build the United States or we will but we will not be with you when we meet with global news makers and talk about the stories that matter on the aljazeera. Platter or to a walk and a string of her letters and how to talk about simply ask intimate ask jeff and wheeling in june at the local pandemic modern woman at Difficult Conversations show you our not an easy you half us. On much but if on one at that. And just sitting down to us explaining what the scene was about as good as virus death. And one last night nicole jumped on and told us that a lot to me went to see did not touch. Anyone and should not go. Home the last few needs of his life i comfort myself with the fact that im not alone. In this its. Own zone feel lost. And since an intimate. Connection. A loss and much of your. I guess. In. What we see me out jess has seen markets disdain tell me who my. Yes so thank you for having me on the show 1st of all of my name is has seen as im on i run compression a few knows in east london a few most i was from a Diverse Community and its such a time each. Movie. Thank you so much for me for having me back on my head are they so i am a clinical psychologist in mumbai india and im quarter of the book the could all know why just what you need to know about the global pandemic. Coming in. Thank you so much for having me my names kayla about why im a chaplain at mount sinai hospital in new york city and im also a presbyterian minister. Will occur. In some ways and so far as im working with patients families and staff my days have not changed and in others obviously theres an increased amount of distance that i have to keep from my patience and moments that are so internet in that otherwise i would intentionally be very close with them. You know when were going out at death we have a loss we always encourage patients and families we were families to touch the body to be with their loved one to hold them to sing to them to pray for them and were having to get creative and think about new ways to marc klaas and to create new rituals with people that. Are meaningful for that moment and meet people where theyre at. Can you design teams. Since not trying to do even some of these. And not. That we need. The. Money soon that needs you. The most. When we dont. So the grieving process for me involves of 5 stages you know as a list as Elizabeth Ross has mentioned and that involves denial then theres anger around the situation where one cannot come to terms with it then that is bargaining where people fear they could have done more in the situation to help. You know prevent the loss of their loved one then comes the stage of sadness and grief and loss and depression finally with acceptance so in this lockdown the lack of being able to or the lack of being able to sometimes even see a close one gone. Increases that your addition of denial and of anger making it so much more difficult to create and believe the process. Im just looking at your website we knew again contortionists you noticed i was an update about the criminologists a lot. Of people that they can still know how this you know how did he have 2000 when he cant be cleansed until. People. Yeah so. You know we are very aware of the grieving process and i was saying we dont necessarily see them in the. Stage but we have had to. Get more training. When we organize our spring so we can still allow a loved one to go out and do their walks with you know making sure where. There is a safe to bring. And even the deceased you know pass on. The virus to us so we had to take on certain procedures. To cope because initially we was doing what everyone was doing were saying no no no we cant do we cant do anything and we just felt like tyrants and it wasnt part of who we were compassionate you know that all of our in compassion in times of death and dying and having not some contact and connection engagement and then we literally overnight we saw about crumble away so i think we just did whatever we could. And then. And then we said lets lets lets find out what we have to do to move through this. The worst of this mess is in. People losing their loved ones and not being a. Problem still. You know i would i would echo that tweet its incredibly painful i mean its. I dont think i could have ever imagined anything like what were seeing right now. And as far as people dying alone and not being able to say goodbye i think its really important to help people find ways to say goodbye and to help people figure out how to maintain a relationship with their dead. I encourage families to just say out loud the things that they need that they need their loved ones to know and to hold hope and hold faith that in some way or another that that message is conveyed to them you know i think about the losses ive experienced in my own life and i maintaining a relationship with my own death relatives is something that is so intrinsically important and that has really shaped shaped my life and shapes my days still. And so i we find different ways to do that ive filmed outside of rome so people can say the rosary aloud or sometimes i will write family members theres a muslim family recently who i brought a crime to and wrote on a post to know everything that there are that their loved ones wanted to be said to them and i asked the nurses to read that post ringback it over and over and over again when they went into the room to coster their care so that the family could know that whether they could be there or not that their loved one heard their words and. The messages that they need them to know are said aloud. Yes absolutely and i feel that Palliative Care is very critical in these moments because as difficult as it is for the families to deal with the loss of someone whos gone and thats a more Long Term Plan that we need to prepare for well for those who are realizing that the hope is to be are. Time a shot and technology can come to create advantage over europe even our you know probably looking be your interest killer in the film terms even are looking at Mental Health concerns the psyche can help sucked in and ease the situation for those who are in a way and succumbing to overt 19 i want to tell you only once and guess about this gentleman his name is joe copping t. M. Cos back in march he was. We cannot own that hes releasing i think 72 year notch he was not. Wanted an ounce hours late he done it and his family isnt much notice about what to do and have. For his funeral and he still insists in the study not to sing with us on the screen when it was much wanted very some doing and then it is yes. We were permitted to have 10 people at the viewing that we needed to enter the funeral home in small groups of 2 to 3 people so many of our family and friends were not able to join us to pay their final respects. After the funeral home we processed to the cemetery where we were able to watch the casket be laid to rest at the grave site but we were not permitted to get out of our cars we were not allowed to have flowers we could not have a priest to give a blessing let alone have an actual funeral it was very difficult and it remains very difficult my mother and brothers are also sick with the virus so at this point i have still yet to hug my mother at all since my father has passed. I have been with my immediate family which my husband my son which im very grateful to have them here with me but i have not been able to see any other family members really so the grieving process has been very different than what you would consider to be typical. Its. Just an instant sense that garner the number of. A few. Months right. So what weve been doing is just working with the guidelines and being and being creative so weve been weve been saying to the news you can actually so weve actually bought some tripods so we set phones are one phone is just actually filming the whole video and another one is another child separately is life changing the videos and people can be. So weve been using technology. But then also theres some 7 inches that just allows only 5 members and then they dont even allow any filming so. You know its really some places a really really tough and some places are just much more relaxed and you know you can have they have their own streaming this so what i did want to mention is the same as what cindy was saying about our fathers who know so the back in early april we did a funeral for. His young gentleman who died in his early fortys of bangladeshi missing 4 children and the age of under the age of 12 and so what happened is that you know we said that the fear could happen because as men mentioned you know one of the 1st thing that sets in in terms of grief is denial so you know the families would say well how do we know its that person are saying you know you know youve got a point how do you know its you that says ok i can take a picture well how do you know you havent taken that picture from some rose so i knew i arranged the wife to come and hearing and at the at the end the loss at the last minute she turned around and said no shes not going to because come and doing hearing because her children have said that. If they call if she goes and she dies and then they wont have anybody that you know no have anybody said i would have not but its their parents so in the end why ty did is that just video called the. And showed her husband and it was really really distressing because he still had all his lines lines in he had just doubled and i was doing my best to you know put soft soft material around me so i wouldnt know as you know horrifically so thats just just just as one of the many many you know. If you know. The signs and. What i am seeing that in the times of these locks now and the biggest challenge is a conflict internally between a lot of things of it shows one of the logic where you understand why theres a social distance although you may logically be able to process why youre not being allowed to meet why youre not being allowed to see the emotional aspect and dealing with that is so crucial as well and in these times for most they are fortunate enough like a scene i was mentioning to have people around them to let the logic prevail over the emotions but thats going to do that a lot of people are dealing with it by just suppressing these emotions and that needs to be dealt with and we need to create in a way to ways its a lot of the work like athena dont allow them or to knit of stu grieve you know its very unfortunate if you look at a lot of people dont even have the fortune of seeing their you know close one who has passed away if we look at countries thats a part of the research for the book that we had written in china that was a lot independent of which religion you belong to youre not all the bodies were cremated because they feared that the widest would spread if there was a body or and that was despite conflict despite systems from the families it was almost like the body or the one who espoused if im cool with one thing became state property and always will cost against it so these are difficult times and difficult situation. Sions just to add even yoda in india initially they had refused to barrios we have a Large Population of hindus of muslims of christians and for everybody and for some form or the other i think funerals are no more the same that they were their rights and it should do not proceed the way they use to and its a its a difficulty you know that we have to morph and deal with in these times we need. Some recent change rituals about what each junes the. Almost seems like doesnt mum teach. Me seeing in you. You know i cant speak so much to the burial processes in new york right now i know that its complicated i know that there have been a great deal of barriers and and also the people who were doing the very best they can to accommodate the structural. In a way that is can grow Public Health priority is listening listening to my colleagues talk i just im reminded of the importance of storytelling as something that is so as such an essential part of all of these are actual grieving process these and its something that im really encouraging families that i work with to figure out how to end rather than suppressing those experiences rather than its so easy right when were all a home to for that to not to mark the change in time what happened the era that were all this morning looks the same way as your world this afternoon except theres been this mess of whole ripped in your heart somewhere between then and now and i think it is so deeply important to you ive heard of assume wakes and zoom ship and i think i think its really really important to have sacred space and sacred opportunities for people to share stories about their dead and to speak to their beloveds and to do that in community because its its not something that can be done alone. He says he wakes in. Digital morning greeting. Home too. A few 100 and theyve seen i watch. And teach you how to maam to read on a device that can move around and in the relatives can actually be part of that due process michigan one other thing is you mentioned zoom and this is saying that hinted to the thousands you know in this fleet 100 people whats one of them why. Its not something. You can see thats if you know. You choose one of the things that were actually seeing is that some of our audience are not finding these Digital Process is actually very comforting im just not this and alan im sudden anger when mixed up together we just leave the most they are. Not. Sometimes if you was the most best time you can have but youve got me coming through all of the welsh you comforting youre remembering the great life its a very seeing process and you got an i pod on a roll. And thats that thats you know. When you do even though absolutely i agree with you know him you know as ira could Big Community experiences for many of the traditional communities and you know even the Young Community they come together they they reunite they connect or talk the person has passed away you know there is a really really strong bond that brings the funeral together. And now were seeing theres this virtual virtual fear north taking place. I just think its better than nothing as much as you know it may be really surreal it may be really upsetting that you cant be physically there after glitch or come up with you know now and i was only allowed 10 people so so i dont have. Our theres another 818. 00 got through the gates and then even then they were saying they kept saying that this this would have had about 500. 00 people on it and it was being filmed by every Single Person i dont know what they were doing because it was no restriction. You know you know i just think that you know we have to make the best possible situation of what we have and. I mean to where ive got a few you know where theyve actually the whole thing was going to be live stream so you know the family asked can they drive into the actual crime and toria and watched and be part of it and straits whether its the star said no that cant you know thats going to. Keep this on there so and then so i know what theyre going to do theyre going to sit outside the crime and torment parts of it in a farmers doing whatever they cant to be to be part of that funeral because its in the sensual part of you know of saying goodbye its the final right so its the last right so its an extra its and. People are going to do whatever they can and as kevin was saying that you know to create these stories keep that person alive whether its in your heart for your prayers or its true talking about that person for moralization and even thats thats becoming quite big and people having memorialization. Zoom or one of the other media platforms and they are very very you know the very very popular because it means instead of just ending now its becoming a global attendance. Is new is he strange that suddenly something that was very uncouth to do a few i teach is stream it to get out seems to be the way that were all. Through one more test and hes. Not this mean. To try to greet each even though not. In a sense not once hes. Personally i must have handled close to 5 or 6 covert related and as us and we have performed a moment as the dry illusion on those people that passed from coded so our traditions and our rituals are being practiced but at a very minimal level as a hate group the words that i offer to those who are grieving their loved ones is to know that it is ok to be sad and to sit with that sadness and to fuel it and similarly as difficult as it may be know that your absence may be helping someone else not suffer the same fate as your loved one so i pray you are able to live a very empathetic life and one which we heal from and we get through after he stuck to his. And thats been a lot of funerals and im just the words of when you can give them an ask you or all to do so if you ate into its needs recently money does. Shop so in providing comfort to those we care about there sometimes right now is a lot of kill for individuals who are not being able to make it to these funerals and to them i would say you know try and have more or use more technology to have smaller force no meetings we need to acknowledge and understand that the way of physical meetings to work with 10200 people can not translate the same way with technology the groups need to be smaller and we like it going with say we need to allow people the opportunity to also share their stories and join into the grieving process so not only is it important for friends and relatives to see the grieving process but to help the family and the close wife go through it if we have the time permits i would like to share a story which has a message for all of us in your. We are at the end of this young. Man and he just uses words just comes and. He signed the story. Without me. It is hard to see it is you you do this professionally. As you do. So the main thing that we say to the families at the moment is you know the really a self we have feelings in mom said we did a lot of time and it was initially so its a tough call it was a tough time to be enough so it was like i was going to like carnage i was exhausted or so i watch in those athirst few weeks and just say you know be kind itself kind to. Be trying to do other things. In one of the into the show but i give you the final and in sentence for. Example. A colleague texted me a hoodie the other day that said if you have a sapling in your hand it seems like the end of the world is near planted and i think that that is that is my hope and my prayer for all of us right now that these losses that these stories that this pain that we will planters outlines and we get together and we find ways to be together and to share our stories and to remember that our matter junkie thinking. And. Thinking watching on the cheek come to us he makes to keep going. When the news breaks or the night of the dumping of garbage in the river by the government has wrecked our lives when people need to be heard and the story needs to be told there are many coming through this make it the only chance they have to eat at least once a day with exclusive interviews and endeavor to me its obvious reasons that the world battled them to make will bring you the latest developments from around the globe aljazeera has teams underground to bring you the only documentaries and live news. He had it all. The fashion the success and the popularity. And then he gave it all up. For the love of his homeland. Football rebels delves into the realm of footballing legend rashid look through free. To fool the Algerian National liberation front with his feet rashid macleish and the f. L. N. Team on aljazeera. A city defined by military occupation theres never been an arab state here at the capitol of jerusalem everyone is welcome but this depot structure that maintains because on a project thats what we refuse it was one of the founders of a settlement with this and the story of jerusalem through the eyes of its own people segregation occupation discrimination injustice this is in the 21st century jerusalem a rock and a hard place on aljazeera. Aljazeera where every. Making sure people are staying at home russia toughens up patrols as coronavirus cases keep climbing. Hello im down jordan this is al jazeera live from our World Headquarters here and also coming up millions more joined the jobless cues in the u. S. As a Coronavirus Crisis bites leaving people Like University graduates facing an uncertain future. Are you going to hire the kid whos like fresh out of school or are you going to hire someone whos been on a desk for flight 5 years shelling by everything have task forces closed the diplomatic areas in libyas capital