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By Alexa Rodriguez
Apr 21, 2021
As a developmental psychologist who helps parents and children learn best practices for maintaining caring relationships, Lele Diamond thinks a lot about what adults should and shouldn’t say to kids. And yet, when her nephew loomed over her niece with a lightsaber, she heard herself say: “Oh, no, thank you!”
“That is absolutely not what you want to be saying when you’re warning somebody off of physical violence,” she says.
Don’t get her wrong—it’s a 
good thing that parents these days recognize the need to be positive and warm in their communication with their kids. What’s not so great are the verbal tics we’ve developed to take the edge off when trying to correct undesirable behaviour and be effusive in 

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